rate_review Reviews

i don't like the use of OCs because they eventually turn into mary sues and explanations of those OCs usually sound farfetched... why would an Uchiha AND a Hyuuga be so negligent to the existence of the girls? It doesn't work because the two are prestigious families and would make sure the secrets of their bloodline will not be revealed. Its already OOC cuz you have that girl a sharingan master and despite it being a natural ability, I doubt she'd be a pro at it without guidance as all great weapons usually happen. But whatever.. I'll give you a chance but next time try not to give it away so much cuz you lose interest with readers.

continue. PLEASE!!!!!

more!!! this story ids awesome ^_^ cant wait for him to be an assasin and plz say u shall get rid of his ugly huge oarnge articles of clothing -gags- i swear its to bright!! lol

Wow, that sounds kind of cool...I've never reviewed before so be honored.....I just thought that your ideas were good and the story was funny and well written out...but...It's kind of hard to know the characters...I mean the OC's...maybe you could be more descriptive So I could get a better idea,Its just a thought so yeah, It was funny when Naruto pushed over Iruka! LOL...so not bad I'll check this story out again, if you update...

Peace out...
-Gizmo

Hmm.... interesting beginning. Looking forward to the next chapter. Ja!

kind of confuse as to how old the girls are and where it's taking place. thought naruto was already in konoha.

Please keep going man it's getting good now!!!!

hey, eto.... first of all I think you've got quiet some talent to write. The story reads quiet fluently. However, why do you have to have so many original characters? I usually love to read SasuNaru fics, but one thing that makes me turn of every story are original characters! Most readers feel like this. Naruto has many wonderful (and also annoying) characters, so actually there is one type of character for everyone, so I really don't understand anyone who adds more. Especially so, if they are some long-lost relative of any of the other characters who naturally have quiet some power. Makes them sound like Mary Sues from the beginning away. Also note that if someone reads a Naruto story (especially SasuNaru) then I don't want to read much about other characters much less OCs. Anyway, I wrote this review cause I think you have quiet some potential, but try to leave out the OCs (Mary Sue's) please.

What I think? Hm... interesting.

i'll give your oc's a chance and i can't wait to see the story