AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for LOVE WEDGE

by hydeholic

schedule December 29, 2010 at 12:00 AM
your tenses are all mixed up. It makes it very hard to read.
person Cyborg18
schedule September 10, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Hey it's been awhile, when are you going to update?! please update!? This is a really awsome fic it would ashame if it goes to waste. I know why don't you give it up for adoption to another Author? Please reply!
person hisoka
schedule February 4, 2009 at 12:00 AM
what does bibiri mean?hope you can update soon
person Vague
schedule February 28, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Hey there, I was reading your story and found that you have amazing talent as an author. This is why I am taking some time to invite you over to my website Laefe E-Publishing. I’m looking for young talented authors who have it in them to make creative original works.

I know that you will automatically think that this might be a scam so to help ease your worries you can either check out my own profile on this site so you can see that I am the real deal, or you can add me to Windows Live Messenger that you can ask me any questions that may come to your mind.

Laefe is a new online epublishing and you are among the first group of authors invited over to the site. I hope that you will consider it. You can find Laefe at http://itsuwari.com/bookstore/. My name is Emilia Baptiste, you can call me Emi when we talk on msn @ waterempath@hotmail.com. All the information you will need will be on the website and anything that is not clear you can ask me.

All I ask is that you give Laefe a look and see if it might be where you would like to further progress in your quest to writing your ultimate story. Thank you for your time and I do hope to hear from you soon.

Emi Baptiste
Admin of Itsuwari.com and Laefe Epublishing.
person Arichan
schedule January 13, 2007 at 12:00 AM
God, it's AWESOME ^.^ write more *__* you're great!
person sasunaru4ever
schedule November 12, 2006 at 12:00 AM
ok i know ive only read the 1st chapter and i hope i don't regret saying this afterwords but man you need to learn how to spell and build up the tension! =p
person Yuri
schedule October 17, 2006 at 12:00 AM
PLEASE UPDATE SOON!!!!!
person Takaouto
schedule October 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I like it, I think it's cool.

But very diffucult to read. With the speech and everything else moving so fast, my eyes are going crazy trying to read it all at once. The page seems very busy. Some grammatical indecencies going on out there, nothing to worry about just yet.

Note though: Whenever a new character speaks, that's a new line. And if the character already speaking starts on a totally new vein, that's a new line as well.

Keep at it! XDDd
person shishio
schedule September 3, 2006 at 12:00 AM
-Blinks- Ok, I've been reading this in silence for a while, I think... It's been so long I can't remember if I've reviewed or not... Heh... Well! I especially like chapter 4 and 5, 4 because Sasuke was so nice to Naruto, and 5 because he's still going after him! Also, I like how you're weaving the Anime together with this story, most people don't do that that do AU stories, and it's pretty annoying... Like, in chapter 5, I noticed that the team of 5 consisted of the same 5 that went after Sasuke when he went to Orochimaru. It's super genious, and then there's the Itachi thing. The only thing that I didn't quite like is that Sasuke is above Kakashi, even though it's fact, I still don't like it, though nothing against you, and I'm certainly not telling you that the story would be better with that change, I'd never do that, just stating something that I've been telling every one as of late.... -Is a total big-mouth-

I can't wait for you to update!
person Hestia
schedule September 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Well for someone learning a new language, this is pretty darn good. I couldn't write in any language, but the one I grew up with. It might help if you could get a native speaker to edit out some of the problems. I like how you get all the main characters in there. You have an interesting way of translating Naruto into an AU that's very appealling. Please don't let the hamster be involved with sex, however, that's too cruel to Naruto. Your Naruto is so loveable! I hope he turns Sasuke into a mushy ball of emotion!