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October 31, 2006 at 12:00 AM
I know this is late, but that was fucuckin' awesome! I love the way you portray an elder Naruto. He's whitty, satyrical, and 100% entertaining. You've probably scrapped this by now, but here's hoping you'll maybe get inspired to come back 'round some day.
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January 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
oooh! Update UPDATE GODDAMN YOU!!
Hellagoddess
Hellagoddess
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October 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Because you deserve a hell lot more than a few measely reviews.
Eh, so you might have an adoring fan on your hands, s'okay, I swear, 'cause I'm not the whole hostile, violent type. Just wanted to say you wrote another kick-ass piece of literature right here and, because fan like it when things are updated, that it would be a shame if you never updated again. I wish I could give you more of a decent review, you know, like how great you wrote out Naruto and Sasuke and everything in between... hm.
Good on you, un ^^.
Eh, so you might have an adoring fan on your hands, s'okay, I swear, 'cause I'm not the whole hostile, violent type. Just wanted to say you wrote another kick-ass piece of literature right here and, because fan like it when things are updated, that it would be a shame if you never updated again. I wish I could give you more of a decent review, you know, like how great you wrote out Naruto and Sasuke and everything in between... hm.
Good on you, un ^^.
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September 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Ach! You left it there!? You bitch! When do we get the next chappie? Huh? Sorry. That was good. Too funny and I like the way it's going. I hope Sasuke is alright. Great writing. Let me know when the next chapter is out, kay?
Snow
Snow
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September 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
So anyways, I don't know a think about the characters, storyline or anything like that...BUT! I did read the story (After all admin must support admin, no?)
So, first off, I'd like to say that I don't know who you used for a Beta...BUT IT'S MARVELOUSLY well edited. Not an error in sight (That I could see, but you always edit my stuffs anyway)!
Second off, first person is always hard to write in because of tense usage and such, but you seem to be going good. Let me know when you get to the smut and I'll come back and read that....Just kidding!
Apollo
(I wasn't really kidding cause I'll be lost in 2 more chapters....And I'm NOT going to get hooked on another series, people will kill me!)
So, first off, I'd like to say that I don't know who you used for a Beta...BUT IT'S MARVELOUSLY well edited. Not an error in sight (That I could see, but you always edit my stuffs anyway)!
Second off, first person is always hard to write in because of tense usage and such, but you seem to be going good. Let me know when you get to the smut and I'll come back and read that....Just kidding!
Apollo
(I wasn't really kidding cause I'll be lost in 2 more chapters....And I'm NOT going to get hooked on another series, people will kill me!)
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September 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Whoa, this reads like a young adult's novel. I very much enjoyed your word choice though.
Merry Christ, you're a limp-wristed sonuvawhore!
Merry Christ, you're a limp-wristed sonuvawhore!
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September 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Really well written! I loved the grammatical errors (that's the first time I've ever said it and MEANT it, not in some smartass sarcastic way but genuinely) and how they fit Naruto's style of speach. Awesome! I can't wait to see where you decide to take this.
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September 27, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I'd really like to see where this is going, how you develop it, and all that. Naruto's voice is great, strong enough to carry the story that you don't need to hear other perspectives. Hope to see more of this. ---a nonfood item