rate_review Reviews

lmao u kick ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahaha

*reads up to the end of chapter 1* ...NO LEMON SCENE?!?!? Dammit! What's the NC-17 for then? XD Okay, back to seriousness. I really like the ending of chapter 2--the part when Itachi touched the deer's muzzle as he calmly cut its throat was chilling and absolutely in-character. Great job; hope to see more soon!

Well for one i KNOW he is terribly OOC....but i am going somewhere with this trust me. dont expect him to stay to much in character cause i am really going to be doing my own thing with this.
and you have to remember itachi is the master of the art of the mind fuck....he loves it and you know you love it when he does it

and the sasuke thing...i caught it and it wont happen any more. if i'm feeling generous i may even go back and change it in chap. 1
if i am.....but im the master of the mind fuck too ne?

you want her to be a virgin? uuuh its a little late for that but i might try to find somthing to spark your interest...maybe have kisame rape some little red headed virgin out of frustrated lust....yay!

p.s
i can't refer to the flashback throughout the story due to the fact that she can no longer remember it OR sasuke, i baisically did it as sort of a transition from her having a memeory and then suddenly not.

Awesome writing! I can't wait for the next chapter! Hope it all ends well.

-Chelsey- AKA HisBeautiful

hmmm, lets see. First off, I believe it's spelled "Sasuke"... just a little FYI. I think you have great promise to be an awesome fanfic writer. For a first story, this isn't so bad. I've seen far worse. In fact, this is better than a lot of stories that aren't even first stories. With enough practice, you could be pretty fantastic. Now, I don't tink it's necessary to just "say" FLASHBACK in a story, thats distracting and unimaginative. since it was short, it might have been better to refer to it throughout the story, without actually saying it. We sort of got the idea of that scene anyhow with the first scene, which was a sort of clever intro. Also, I think Itachi is sort of out of character. Why the hell is he acting so nice, trying to convince Sakura that they're married? that's sort of odd. But then again, Ita/Saku stories are like way hard to do right. plus, this is probably a PWP so what can you do? But still, you should treat all your stories as practice and try to make them the best possible. A little more exposition would be nice. Draw some scenes out, explain everything that they're thinking and feeling. Why would they take this course of action? How do they feel about this recent turn of events? I hope you don't take this as a flame or anything, because it's not. It's a helpful artistic critique. I only offer these things to people who I think could really benefit from them. You have an extended vocabulary and a good way with words. Learn to use it to the best of your power. I don't say this so alot, LOADS of people are lost causes as far as writing goes. Keep reading, keep writing, and I'll come back later to read the rest of this.

its cool...i like it...normally i cant read storys adn the girl isnt a virgin..but i guess cos theres not alot of sakura/itachis around im gonna have to deal! --""

Hey great first chapter I really enjoyed it and even better i love itasakusasu pairings ( though even more Itasaku ^^ ) This si going really great I am a bit sad that sakure lost the baby (?) but it gives her a chance with Itachi <33 ^^ ( yay!!) lol so please continue this fic and hopefully update soon :.begs.: And pretty pretty please let it end as Itasaku *begs on knees and hopeful look* bye! ^^

Great story, and jelous Sasuke is the best. I like the plot and the Idea and I hope you update soon ^-^

Oooooohhh, is this a Saku/Ita fic? I LOVE Ita/Saku, my fav pairing (when done right). Ok, I always try to give a good, and constructive review, sometimes I end up babbling, so here goes: I noticed a few minor errors like the use of then instead of than, or maybe it was the other way around, either way, no big deal. Overall the plot looks good. (On a side note, I didn't like the fact that Sasuke bit Sakura to mark her, its too overdone, but that is me.) I'm sorry, I forgot to pay attention to if you did tense swapping (mixing past and present) so can't say one way or the other. No punctuation errors jumped out at me, thumbs up there.

Wanna let you know that it is Sasuke not Sauske. I know that phoenetically it would make sense to spell it Sauske, but that is one of the Japanese language's quirks - they whisper certain sounds. I was reading this one story of FF.net, the author thought that Sakura was calling Kakashi "Kaka-sensei" when Sakura calls him "Kakash(i)-sensei, whispering the i. But, for those who are not learning Japanese, how are you gonna know that? So anyway, enough with the impromptu Japanese lesson, hehe. Other than that, if there were spelling errors, I think it was prolly a case of an odd typo, cuz nothing stood out to me. (Mind you, I did an "enjoyment" reading, so I was not looking for errors)

I really look forward to seeing where you take this. Itachi is a hard character to write, I should know, I have my own Ita/Saku fic that is in limbo, cuz... well, Itachi is a hard character to write! lmao. This first chapter holds a lot of promise, I will definately be watching for updates. (Squee's in fangirl delight at having found a new Ita/Saku fic ^__^) And I will keep my soggy ramen noodle at ready, should you stop updating, and beat you with it, evil taskmaster that I am, "write for me my pretty, muahahahaha!" No, wait, your not supposed to EAT the noodle, your supposed to FEAR it! ^_^*