schedule
February 5, 2006 at 12:00 AM
THE MISSPELLING IS GONNA KILL ME.
it's JIRAIYA by the way.
and you need spellcheck.
words yoou repeatadly misspellled-
bastard, Kaiten, actually, kuinoichi, miserable, thought, rise, dramatically, shopping, person
THAT'S NOT EVEN ALL OF IT. OR EVEN REALLY SOME.
do you even re-read this??
it'a a great plotline, though.
just revise (&continue!!)
it's JIRAIYA by the way.
and you need spellcheck.
words yoou repeatadly misspellled-
bastard, Kaiten, actually, kuinoichi, miserable, thought, rise, dramatically, shopping, person
THAT'S NOT EVEN ALL OF IT. OR EVEN REALLY SOME.
do you even re-read this??
it'a a great plotline, though.
just revise (&continue!!)
schedule
February 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
great story keep it up :D
schedule
January 27, 2006 at 12:00 AM
If you want a program that has spellchecking, I'd recommend downloading OpenOffice (www.openoffice.org). Tis free, and is open source. Mostly compatible with Office, too.
Good story, nice plot, and I'm willing to give you some leeway on the grammar/spelling due to the Wordpad thing >.>
Ero-sennin = Jiraiya
Hinata's father = Hyuuga Hiashi
Hinata's sister = Hyuuga Hanabi
Good story, nice plot, and I'm willing to give you some leeway on the grammar/spelling due to the Wordpad thing >.>
Ero-sennin = Jiraiya
Hinata's father = Hyuuga Hiashi
Hinata's sister = Hyuuga Hanabi
schedule
January 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Looking forward to more
schedule
January 9, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Okay good story would like more. The name o f Hinata's father is Hiashi. update soon later
schedule
January 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
You have a nice story going but your forgetting a few things. First of all Hinata's mother died so why is she here! I didn't think you would forget the Hyuuga's head's name, it is Hiashi of course, let me repeat HIASHI. Please don't get me wrong I think you have a great story and you should continue just put my info to good use.
schedule
January 2, 2006 at 12:00 AM
the Hyuga clan leader and Hinata and Hanbi's father is Hiashi
schedule
January 1, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Nice! Please write more !
schedule
December 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Sorry bout previous review about comment on the pricing. 298,000 yen is 2,980.00 which is more than reasonable for custom made formal wear.
schedule
December 29, 2005 at 12:00 AM
This is rather well written, besides some small errors that could be fixed through having a beta'er or some such. Just one thought though....298,000 yen for a hiori (sp), that is roughly $29,800.00 (if this is normal pricing for formal wear, dont hurt me, just thought that I would bring it up, since if it was that much, Naruto might have made a comment on the price). Besides that, near everything is perfect.