rate_review Reviews

oh yeah, and someone was trying to correct your spelling but they are also wrong - its chakara.

Wow that was HOT. Please be careful about your spelling though. There have been several times that you have misspelled Itachi's name as Itashi.

First off, I see you as a mature person. I am speaking to you as someone I respect as a fellow author, so don't take anything I say as negative.

Constructive Crit:

Well, it was kind of a slow start, I had a hard time getting into it. I knew it had to be good with the amount of reviews its recieved in such a short time, plus your other story was awesome. But once things got moving, it was really good! Aside from a few typo's - which were words, so spellcheck didn't catch them, i.e. redundance rather than redundancy (which I may have spelled wrong, no spellcheck, but you get the idea) - everything seems to be in good order. One other thing stuck out at me, you mentioned Sound a few times as if Itachi/Akatsuki was associated with Sound - they are not. Overall spelling, grammar, punctuation, tense usage, etc are all very good. Keep up the great work!

Ideas(possible suggestions):

I don't think Sakura should just roll over and give up to Itachi this easily. Sakura is a strong character. While she is not as strong as some, like Naruto, she is still strong. She is physically strong, she is determined, and while Sasuke is her weakness, I think in the light of morning, Itachi would be surprised to see some of that strength and determination surface. I'll concede that Sakura does have a lot of weaknesses, but Tsunade has taught her for several years to focus on her strengths so her weaknesses will no longer be a liability for her.

Remember to give Itachi some flaws. While he is hot & seemingly perfect, he is human. (The suggestion of his arrogance in thinking he has completely moulded Sakura to his will, only to find that she's not as completely malleable as he first thought could potentially show a flaw in Itachi's thinking.)

In closing, this story looks great and I can't wait to see where you take it (with or without my suggestions) I look forward to updates and any other stories you will be posting!

I don't intend to get into a lengthy argument over how to spell Japanese words in English. Since Japanese is written in an alphabet that is NOT roman lettering, there is debate over how to spell what. There is no right or wrong way to spell Japanese words, only what is commonly accepted. I quote this from Living Language's Conversational Japanese. I have always seen and always spelled the word Chakra. HOWEVER, whatever way YOU choose to spell the word, is UP TO YOU.

wow, I have to see whats gonna happen next.

Awesome, I can't wait for the next chapter!

An awesome story, you definately have a nack for storytelling. I can't wait for the second chapter!

Wow, I really like this so far. It has a great mood, and I love the plot. I can't wait to see what happens next. Thanks so much for writing, and please update soon.

WoW this fic is great .very well written no ones Ooc. please update soon!

awesome start! I'm dying to find out what happens next!