rate_review Reviews

*whibble*
that was gorgeous,
perfect gift
prefect (next) day
:p

could the gift be a glass fox?? i loved this story. really it's so sweet as well as sad at the same time. it's nice to see naruto so happy for a change. -nods to self-

I thought the gifts were a great idea they put a smile on my face and I was nodding in total agreement with iruka's thoughts on which would go to whom :d it was a nice fic Thanks for posting it ^_^

Hina xXxx

I hope you update soon =) I really really love this story..
greets stephanie

Oh jeez... I have NO CLUE what the gift is!!! I wanna guess though so you'll update. It's expensive, there are two of them, I'm going to rule out weapons cuz that would be just stupid, I wanna say something carved out of stones.

Yeah, I have no clue. Very very touching chapter though. I'm looking forward to the next. (sad that it's going to be the last!)

It's sweet :), I'll be checking tomorrow for the Epilogue.
Thanks for posting ;)

Hina xXxx

OMG that was so lovely!! so cute!! there were a few grammatical errors, but still the images were great, nyah! I wonder what the gift was... but you dont give lots of clues... you cruel author you! Update soon, ne?

this is a really good story. i would love to see the end of this story, i would love to see how you wind this story up, it's interesting. i was very sad though when i read part 4. it was good, it was really good. although, i would recommend a beta to make this story that much better. there were some grammer and spelling issues, nothing serious. email me at elf_hanyou@yahoo.com, i would be more than willing to help you out, if you would like.

other than that, great job my dear. very creative, very original and great job. i look forward to an update!
~hanyou-elf

Wah. I read through that chapter so fast. When it was done, I was like 'it's over?'. Heh, it had me captivated. The descriptions when Naruto let out his frustrations on the post were really good. I think any type of fighting scences are very hard to write, but you did a very good job.

Um... One thing has been bugging me. I know this is your first story, so it really doesn't have to be perfect, but sometimes, the use of inappropriate tenses really annoys me. It isn't that distracting, but I suggest you don't do it. Read through a book or two and you'll note that most are written in a sort of past-tense omniscient POV. When the characters are talking/thinking, it's suitable (and desireable) to use present tense, but when narrating, keep your tense consistent throughout, i.e, either use present tense or past. For example...

Unsurprisingly, neither Sasuke nor Sakura *has* taken notice of the difference in their normally loud companion.

That's from your first chapter. The sentence is grammatically correct, but *has* should be *had* so it will fit in with the tense you're using when narrating during the rest of the fic. An abrupt change like that can be distracting and it kinda sounds weird while reading.

'Kay, so that's just a constructive criticism, not a flame. I do absolutely love the way you write, I just think that using little tip might make you all the better^.^

Oh, by the way, I took your warning to heart and had tissues while reading (and subsequently crying). Hee, I think the fact your writing is able to bring out that much emotion in people is indicative of what a good and creative author you are^.^