rate_review Reviews

Ooooh! Sounds very promising! I look forward to reading more about it!! :D

that is a pretty good start,
please update soon.

HEY YOU! i liked it! sry i couldn't be on the phone and read it @ the same time (^_^) the lemon was pretty funny though....you might wanna add more detail and check spelling & names...AND IT IS SHIZUNE! in you face! lol...u thought i was stupid...
but i luved it! if u need a beta! u know who 2 call (^_^)
LUV YA!
Charm

i can't wait for the next chapter ;)

Well it has a good premise so far. Just pay close attention to grammar, be consistent, and make sure to have good character development. You can't go wrong with that. Update soon.

Not a bad start, the idea your going with is an interesting one and you could really work this into an entertaining story. I do have a suggestion though. . . I would suggest you would look into finding a beta to help you out. AFF's beta group is a great place to look, everyone is very nice there and it's not that hard to find the right person to work with. While we all make mistakes; trust me I make plenty of my own, it's just the story was a little hard to get through because of the errors. Hope you stick with it, thanks for sharing your story. Take care.

Cool first chapter! Please continue!!