rate_review Reviews

I know I've been wearing it out reading, reading, reading your D/s and not commenting. I should be ashamed of myself, really, but wow, you're probably comment-sore from a story like this one! I just wanted to say that this particular chapter seriously gave me chills. Incredibly sweet. GaaraxShikamaru is so perfect. I love the relationship you've built for them. The way you put all the little interesting details in your writing just makes it so damn good. I'm having a ball reading your work!

Also, although I didn't comment on the last chapter, I laughed my ass off. Somehow it hit my funnybone! Naruto and Sasuke and the big ruckus and Itachi was the instigator of the whole shittin' mess! And the way Genma choked on his cinnamon stick was priceless! I really enjoy a little comic relief in these stories. You are just such a master storyteller. I'm in awe of You!

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE UPDATE REALLY SOON. I can't wait to see what happens next.

What I hate about AFF is that I can't email you what would like to suggest, so I'm going to stick it in this review.
Basically, I must admit first of all I did not want to read this fic, I DID not want to be sucked into it. I thought GOD NO HELP ME, and now I'm addicted and I hate you so MUCH, because secretly underneath all of this I like it, I really really (cannot stress enough) love this story. Although I can't read some bits, but anyway. That's beside the point.
What I wanted to say was concerning the plot with Naruto's dad you could always go with the classic died in childbirth scenario, and Naruto's father blames Naruto for it and was really in love with his mother. Maybe he didn't want a kid, maybe they argued and she didn't tell him. Maybe she had cancer and wouldn't take Chemo because she was pregnant and after the baby was born the cancer killed her. And Naruto's Dad took out his anger on Naruto and abandoned him because he wanted his wife to abort but she wouldn't.
And as for Sasuke and his I cannot cum, problem, perhaps you should 1) write that sex scene in another closet/dressing room and 2) you've written some perfectly beautiful sex scenes before when Sasuke couldn't cum, specifically the one when Sasuke talks about feeling loved for the first time ever. I would do, two or three scenes over the week and then jump it. Summaries it and let it push forward something about the relationship. As in, do they move in together? It's not JUST sex, I mean, this has to be a working relationship so, if Sasuke's really frustrated, how is he going to take it out on Naruto? Would he make Naruto pay for it? You can play around with it a bit, I mean Naruto is going to want to come in and make his mark and so is Sasuke. So we're moving into really intimate ground here....that would be fun to play around with?
:'3
Please email me if you think I could help at all, I need more of this fic, it's so addictive!

i don't know who's happier? YOu or my inner yaoi feind! YAY! oh and for the files what if you ust posted them seperately in a diff fc you know like D/s 'deleted' senes and what not?

I really like the old epilogue. It still seems to work with the story for the most part. I think you should see if you can still use it. :D

I love where you were going with the whole HiaKimi relationship in the lost chapter. And I'm not saying that you should replace the old one but, it would be super special awesome if you would finish and post the HiaKimi chappie. I could promise some fanart for HiaKimi and mabye more later. XD Anyway. . . Your awesome keep it up!

I liked both of of the missing chapters. I liked the re-make of the Gaara/shika chapter. The original....i love you. I would totally like to read the continuation of the Hia/kimi story. I'm glad the it didn't end. So many couples would not have gotten together if it did. We all worship you. ^_^

as for the chapters i like the ones you already have up.

i wouldn't skip the whole week because that skips for everyone and you would end up needing to say what each person did during the week. i think mainly Gen/Rai/Ibiki <3 and Gaara Kank and their subs would work. but maybe a day of naruto and sasuke so it's not a huge gap (and i'm shure some people wanna see sasukes suffering >.<)

I'm so glad that you got your hardrive back! How the hell did that happen anyways?! Things to be thankful for, huh? Onto the unfinished chapters. [I]Personally[/I], I liked where you were going with the HiashiKimi old version chapter but I also sort of like the new version too. I would probably say finish writing the old version and see if it leads you in the same direction as the newer version or just combine the two someway. As for the GaaraShika I didn't care too much for the old version. It was like I was reading a completely different story. Shika seemed too romantic and gave in way too easily to the dress and pearls. Gaara seemed a little soft too. I would have thought that he'd punish Shika if the only reason he was unchained was because he was laughing (I hope that made sense). [U]Did.not.[/U] like Shika's old whiny, naggy mother either. I loved how in the new version Shika's mom was a real ball-buster. I think Gaara and she could come to really get along and respect one another, maybe Gaara could even share some pointers on whipping techniques, but they really should butt heads in the beginning. And the garden party, mooncakes and finger foods seemed too fluffy, something more suited to Deidara or Kimimaru. For Naruto and Sasuke, what about it they actually [I]dated[/I] while Sasuke's healing or just getting to know more about each other. Maybe drop some hints of Sasuke's past to Naruto or some other drama such as Naruto thinking he sees his father on street one day, and after deciding on why his dad left him (something paltry like a whorish woman who ended up steeling all his money or something from Judo tournaments only to find out she was really in love with a rival and she ruined him?) he actually will run into him on street. Or maybe Naurto's business booms and he hires an apprentice and is caught up with that while Sasuke deals with the finer workings of Naruto's foundation. I would really like to see some more of Ibi/Gen/Rai and it's been quite awhile since we've seen KisIta, maybe get more into HiaKimi and what's going on with NejiSai and KankShino. Sorry if this wasn't any help to you, but you should know that this story has invaded my very life. While Thanksgiving was underway all I kept thinking about was Sasuke with a ball gag, blindfolded and tied up with rope in such a way as to have his legs drawn up and splayed while being stuffed like a turkey. I don't really think stuffing would a good thing to use but I didn't really think of what would be good. In your "epilogue" Sasuke didn't seem to know about the Prostate Popper maybe that would be suitable. Also, have you ever considered putting Sasuke in the rope bondage that is tied around the neck and forms triangles over the breast area and ends up tying the hands/arms behind the back? I haven't really explained it very well (I'm sure I have a pic somewhere),but I'd love to see him in it. I had him in this during that stuffing situation I was talking about. Sorry this is so wordy I just really wanted to express myself tonight. Sorry, sorry!!

P.S. Keep up the great work!!!

well congratulations on your hard drive finding it's way out of the black hole!
you must be so happy!!!

have to tell you, your second renderings of "the lost chapters" were much more engrossing.
a thousand times better when you were put on the spot and produced sexier and funnier chappies the second time around:)

your epilogue however, was right on the money!!! Perfect! Wonderful! but I'm a little saddened to have read it now.
OK...you can put it in after (or maybe before!) you get everyone to the wedding. we are going to the wedding?

so take your time, how you want this to unfold will come to you:) no worrries:)