rate_review Reviews

Glad to see you have decided to complete this story.

Okay then, so if Naruto doesn't get pregnant from this encounter,then, how does he get pregnant??

-Damp *Yay!! You update!!*

fiu! thanks for the author note, guess what? before I read it I was raking by brains for a nice (less illogical) way for Naru chan to get pregnant but now am not freaking out anymore ^^
Nice work, Haruhi its just adorable

Yay! An update. It was a good chapter, but it felt like mostly filler as I'm waiting to get back to the present day Naruto and Sasuke. But I know it's important to see what happened to them in the past and I really like where this is going. I thought it was awesome seeing Naruto take charge like that, that was great.

Can't wait for more!

ps: Haruhi is just sooo cute!

I missed this story!
I love your portrayal of Jiraiya and him as a 'grandfather' is comical in a good way. Him just hamming it up.
And the scene... you know what 'scene' I'm talking about. WOW. Just wow.
Please more... soon. :)

I love this story so much that I don't understand how I didn't see this last chapter sooner! Really, darling, you're doing a great job.

The beginning was adorable beyond words. Really, that little girl is waay too cute in all her manipulative glory XD

Sakura and Neji? Really? Wow. I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around that one. I just...have never pictured those two together. But it's your story, so I trust you.

The last scene was sweet and so very them. I loved the slighly awkward feeling to it, because really, if it's both their first times, even with a demon fox guiding the way, it wouldn't be perfect. But in a way, that was perfect for them. That little kiss on Naruto's brow just melted me.

Great job overall.

On purely technical terms, you should try to expand your descriptive adjectives. Especially for Sasuke. You overuse (to the point of abuse) the term "raven-haired" before a noun, i.e. "raven-haired teen". Try: brunet, black eyed, the Uchiha, dark haired, pale, lean, or just plain Sasuke. At least you don't refer to him as "the raven" (for which I thank you!), but be on the look out for that.

I don't mean to sound presumptuous, but if you happen to be looking for a beta I'm totally willing to volunteer XD I really do love your story and would be incredibly glad to let you bounce ideas or just purely grammatical things off me, if you'd like. My email is mignonne422@gmail.com

Really though, great job, sweetie. I do love this story and hope you do update soon!

Not gonna comment on the rightness or wrongness of Naruto as seme. Personally I don't like it, I don't see Sasuke as someone who'd let himself be topped especially by his ultimate rival, but whatever floats your boat. I will say though, you'd should change the pairing in the description to SasuNaruSasu instead of SasuNaru.

I did like the new chapter though. Sakura and Neji is a pairing I've seen a few times and I actually kind of like. And Haruhi is an interesting child, kind of cute. Can't wait to see how she was conceived, and for the present meeting for Sasuke and Naruto. And of course for Naruto to finally make it to Konoha. I guess that all leads to: I hope your next update comes soon.

I love your chapter

It´s good written and has no errors(or none that I can detect)

But "see ya soon"!? I don´t want to insult you but it´s been almost THREE months.But I can understand you really I have a problem when I write something that I can´t post it quickly

So bya

I love this story! Please continue! it's been soooo long without an update!! I wanna know what happens next, please???

Love the story hope you finish, look forward to the next chapter....