AFF Fiction Portal

rate_review Reviews

for Training with Itachi

by botonchan

person Veja24
schedule May 2, 2009 at 12:00 AM
"Otouto" means "little brother", so don't use it as Sasuke's nickname for Itachi. Although "Niisan" means "brother", I have never hear older one calling his younger brother Niisan. Perhaps you should avoid making Itachi call Sasuke Niisan. Use Sasuke's name instead, or endearment "Otouto".
person Anon
schedule August 12, 2008 at 12:00 AM
dum dum dum!
person Maki
schedule August 6, 2008 at 12:00 AM
er nice story and all but you need to check you coding or something (bear with me i don't know how posting works) cause its really awkward to read. the middle is all italics not just the thoughts, you're missing ALOT of punctuations and you're mixing up your 'niisan', 'aniki' and 'otouto'(sp? whatever you get the idea) again. your other chapters were fine (well exept what i told you in my last review) so i know it's not completely you ^___^
person qwerty
schedule August 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Interesting...
Can't wait for the punishment!
schedule August 3, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Can't wait til Sasuke winning the little game! ^ ^
person Aikotina
schedule August 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
ne ne; its a good start and seems like a nice plot; but just so you know 'niisan' is japanese for 'older brother' so only sasuke would use this term for itachi and not vice versa. 'otouto' means 'little brother' but in an almost detached sense; like introducing him as your little brother and not actually speaking to him. just thought i'd let you know. please update soon!
person bowy
schedule August 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
A good start. I look forward to the next chapter
person maki
schedule August 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
great start hope you update soon so i don't forget all about this. in your last paragraph you made itachi call sasuke nii-san instead of otouto. no biggie ^_^
person qwerty
schedule August 1, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Very intriguing! This is very promising!
Update!