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August 20, 2012 at 12:00 AM
This is a great story. I love how you're working a pseudo-crossover thanks to certain Bleach elements in addition to how Naruto is trying to manipulate the Elemental Nations into a lasting peace with the help of his jinchuuriki brothers and sisters plus other orphans Naruto grew up with. Of course I am a little disappointed that you are keeping the whole of Naruto's plans hidden to such a degree that we can't even guess what he is planning to do next as he is setting assets in place among the hidden villages.
Speaking of assets in the many different villages, I would love if Naruto could manage to get Guren under his thumb so he has some way to keep an eye on Orochimaru. Given how the Snake Sannin's plans have been shot out six different ways from Sunday with Kabuto's death and Konoha not hosting the Chunin exams, Oro is certainly going to be on a tear. Considering that he sent 2 different teams to Tetsu no Kuni and only one of those teams mattered to him(likely members of the Sound 4), it would be safe to assume he'd send his strongest Jonin as one of senseis for his teams which would be Guren. The high focus you're put in this story on seduction for a major asset in a shinobi's arsenal, it would be very nice to see you use it in a confrontation-like situation such as an assassination, gaining a new asset, or information gathering mission.
Moving on to the citrus elements, I love how you're working this. You do a great job on keeping the plot moving while still allowing for multiple lemons with different people. Of course I'm pleased that sometimes you just allude to some lemons, however I am disappointed in the fact that every time you have stated one would happen with Kurohime it was never shown. I really would appreciate if you could give something here sometime soon, since she will also be one of Naruto's wives. Also I like how you are not discriminate towards yuri pairings either, but am surprised that you haven't attempted to write out a threeway given this. Another thing that pleases me, is you are taking sexual experience into account. This was most prominently noticed during the Sasuke/Sakura lemon. Of course the lemon I'm most looking forward to at the moment is the Kiba/Kurenai lemon you have hinted at and I do hope that you go through with it even if Kiba doesn't make Chunin. In fact, I'd like that even better if you include Hinata, but I'd prefer Naruto gets the first threeway if you intend to write such citrus scenes.
Another thing I'm surprised at is that you haven't had Naruto get his 'graduation gift' from Yuugao yet. Given how this was mentioned way back after Naruto had his time with Suzume, this is very shocking. Although given Yuugao is a member of ANBU, maybe she just hadn't had a chance to 'visit' him as she also has her sick fiance Hayate to keep company and who knows whether she does Hiruzen any favors(Which I wouldn't mind seeing him get a blowjob while some team is coming to get a mission, even old people need it sometimes. Why else would he read Jiraiya's books?). I also look forward to a lemon with Naruto and Azula(and maybe her friends as well?) while they are visiting Tetsu no Kuni since you seem to have hinted at Azula having romantic feelings for Naruto. Of course her friends are wild cards since you haven't mentioned them before now, but maybe in the future if not right away? Of course I also wonder if you plan on having Naruto get a citrus with Kushina, Mei, or Yugito, in the future given one is his mother(but you don't seem to have a problem with incest, so maybe), however all 3 of them are much older then him. Still I am curious on whether you may bring Karin Uzumaki around sometime soon or whether you may make Tayuya also a member of the Uzumaki clan. There also is the thought that Karui might be an Uzumaki whose mother was kidnapped much like Kushina and forced to be a breeder. Of course I'd also hope that you make an OC Uchiha girl for Sasuke to be paired with that is recovering from Danzou's mind**** training, maybe a daughter of Shisui Uchiha would fit best?
Anyway, I like how things have been shaping up with the Akatsuki as well. You did a great job with Danzou being assassinated by Naruto and the extent of his crimes being released for public knowledge to shake things up for the group of rogue ninja. Of course this was somewhat altered, because for some reason they never found out that Itachi was ordered to kill the Uchiha clan so I guess the village must have kept this fact known only to the council for now while Jiraiya uses Itachi as a spy. However I do like that Nagato is curious about Itachi's motives after he learned that there are members of the Uchiha clan still alive. Also I'm rather interested in what Nagato may be thinking now that he knows that Uzushio has been resurrected, although he doesn't know whether they are members of the Uzumaki clan.
All in all, this is a great story. Of course as I said, I wish you would foreshadow more on future plot elements so we have some idea of what Naruto may be planning overall once his people are in position but I guess only time will tell. I do look forward to the finals in the exams and I wonder if you might have some of the matches end in ways that females would see the true horrors of being a kunoichi. Given how you have given Konoha a way to watch the exams from their stadium, this would certainly cause some civilians to not put their children in the ninja academy however this is something every kunoichi should worry about. I guess the best option for such a victim would be Team Bee from Kumo, since they have two kunoichi and their male teammate isn't exactly the greatest to truly help should they be overpowered especially by a team with all males, such as the second team from Iwa that you hadn't done anything with or the team from Ame. Though there is the second team from Suna, but I'd hope that you might have Pakura on this team. This is all up to you I guess.
Thanks for writing and please update soon:)
Speaking of assets in the many different villages, I would love if Naruto could manage to get Guren under his thumb so he has some way to keep an eye on Orochimaru. Given how the Snake Sannin's plans have been shot out six different ways from Sunday with Kabuto's death and Konoha not hosting the Chunin exams, Oro is certainly going to be on a tear. Considering that he sent 2 different teams to Tetsu no Kuni and only one of those teams mattered to him(likely members of the Sound 4), it would be safe to assume he'd send his strongest Jonin as one of senseis for his teams which would be Guren. The high focus you're put in this story on seduction for a major asset in a shinobi's arsenal, it would be very nice to see you use it in a confrontation-like situation such as an assassination, gaining a new asset, or information gathering mission.
Moving on to the citrus elements, I love how you're working this. You do a great job on keeping the plot moving while still allowing for multiple lemons with different people. Of course I'm pleased that sometimes you just allude to some lemons, however I am disappointed in the fact that every time you have stated one would happen with Kurohime it was never shown. I really would appreciate if you could give something here sometime soon, since she will also be one of Naruto's wives. Also I like how you are not discriminate towards yuri pairings either, but am surprised that you haven't attempted to write out a threeway given this. Another thing that pleases me, is you are taking sexual experience into account. This was most prominently noticed during the Sasuke/Sakura lemon. Of course the lemon I'm most looking forward to at the moment is the Kiba/Kurenai lemon you have hinted at and I do hope that you go through with it even if Kiba doesn't make Chunin. In fact, I'd like that even better if you include Hinata, but I'd prefer Naruto gets the first threeway if you intend to write such citrus scenes.
Another thing I'm surprised at is that you haven't had Naruto get his 'graduation gift' from Yuugao yet. Given how this was mentioned way back after Naruto had his time with Suzume, this is very shocking. Although given Yuugao is a member of ANBU, maybe she just hadn't had a chance to 'visit' him as she also has her sick fiance Hayate to keep company and who knows whether she does Hiruzen any favors(Which I wouldn't mind seeing him get a blowjob while some team is coming to get a mission, even old people need it sometimes. Why else would he read Jiraiya's books?). I also look forward to a lemon with Naruto and Azula(and maybe her friends as well?) while they are visiting Tetsu no Kuni since you seem to have hinted at Azula having romantic feelings for Naruto. Of course her friends are wild cards since you haven't mentioned them before now, but maybe in the future if not right away? Of course I also wonder if you plan on having Naruto get a citrus with Kushina, Mei, or Yugito, in the future given one is his mother(but you don't seem to have a problem with incest, so maybe), however all 3 of them are much older then him. Still I am curious on whether you may bring Karin Uzumaki around sometime soon or whether you may make Tayuya also a member of the Uzumaki clan. There also is the thought that Karui might be an Uzumaki whose mother was kidnapped much like Kushina and forced to be a breeder. Of course I'd also hope that you make an OC Uchiha girl for Sasuke to be paired with that is recovering from Danzou's mind**** training, maybe a daughter of Shisui Uchiha would fit best?
Anyway, I like how things have been shaping up with the Akatsuki as well. You did a great job with Danzou being assassinated by Naruto and the extent of his crimes being released for public knowledge to shake things up for the group of rogue ninja. Of course this was somewhat altered, because for some reason they never found out that Itachi was ordered to kill the Uchiha clan so I guess the village must have kept this fact known only to the council for now while Jiraiya uses Itachi as a spy. However I do like that Nagato is curious about Itachi's motives after he learned that there are members of the Uchiha clan still alive. Also I'm rather interested in what Nagato may be thinking now that he knows that Uzushio has been resurrected, although he doesn't know whether they are members of the Uzumaki clan.
All in all, this is a great story. Of course as I said, I wish you would foreshadow more on future plot elements so we have some idea of what Naruto may be planning overall once his people are in position but I guess only time will tell. I do look forward to the finals in the exams and I wonder if you might have some of the matches end in ways that females would see the true horrors of being a kunoichi. Given how you have given Konoha a way to watch the exams from their stadium, this would certainly cause some civilians to not put their children in the ninja academy however this is something every kunoichi should worry about. I guess the best option for such a victim would be Team Bee from Kumo, since they have two kunoichi and their male teammate isn't exactly the greatest to truly help should they be overpowered especially by a team with all males, such as the second team from Iwa that you hadn't done anything with or the team from Ame. Though there is the second team from Suna, but I'd hope that you might have Pakura on this team. This is all up to you I guess.
Thanks for writing and please update soon:)
schedule
August 14, 2012 at 12:00 AM
absolutely loving ur adultfanfic continue soon and quickly
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July 21, 2012 at 12:00 AM
well, there's shock parentage for you. How will keshi cope knowing that Rin is still alive.
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July 19, 2012 at 12:00 AM
oh my god i love this story especially with the sex on it as i havent had any in 3 months after i dumped my last boyfriend, he wasnt that good at bed so he had to go,
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July 19, 2012 at 12:00 AM
Nother great chapter and love the story happy that he got with hanata and thout the back stary for Tenten was cool and like it. and like that Rin's back cant what to see what hapens next and looking foward to the finals too hope next update is soon.
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March 12, 2012 at 12:00 AM
one of the best naruto fanfiction I ever read so please continue this story in regular intervals.
Cheers
Haroon
Cheers
Haroon
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March 4, 2012 at 12:00 AM
It looks like the mibu's plans are rolling along nicely. It'll be interesting to see how Sas snakey new friend plays into things. And our fave 'Roche makes his first appearance too. Can't wait to see where things go from here.
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December 7, 2011 at 12:00 AM
I have to say that I have thus far enjoyed the hell out of your story. I look forward to reading the rest of it and the others on your profile.
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November 19, 2011 at 12:00 AM
ty for the update. been a while and i love seeing what you come up with next. ^^
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September 18, 2011 at 12:00 AM
thank you for sharing this fantastic chapter please continue a.s.a.l.a. but please dont take to long