rate_review Reviews

Hey I love this fic and have been visiting this sight regularly to see of you've updated. I can't wait to see how it develops but I guess I'll have to! I love that Naruto seems really dark and I'm looking forward to see where he and Hinata go on from all this.

Please update soon!!

Okay, it's official--I cannot STAND you or this story.

One, I can't stand you, as the author for STOPPING AT DAMN CLIFFIES!!!! XD and Two, I can't stand this story simply because...well, it's TOO GOOD TO END AT DAMN CLIFFIES, rotflmao.

Bet you thought this was a flame, didn't you? NEVER!!!!!!!!!! Okies, seriously though, looking forward to the next chapters!!!! Can't wait!!!!! Keep up the great work!!!!!!!!!! And please don't be mad at me for almost giving you a heart-attack! Much loves!!!

Hey the chapter was a bit unneving but it seems like ur heading into a very dark passage for Naruto

nice chapter, it's getting good, can't wait for the update.

this Chapter is not bad or anything. I don't think it is a filler more than it is a teaser. Check out my profile. My Email should be there. If not, I'm at gmail.com. Same name

Nicely done. If I go with het pairings on stories like this, Hina/Naru is a great one. Can't wait for more!

This is a good start, and I'm wondering why you haven't updated in so long. It's okay, though. Take your time and don't give upon the story, for you have a good concept going on.

One thing I will suggest is getting a beta reader. Your spelling isn't bad at all, but your sentence and paragraph construction could certainly use some work. If you would like, I can help you out on that. This story has a LOT of potential, it'd be disappointing if you gave up because of lack of reaction.

Anyway, keep up the good work.

Ok, for a first chapter that was very nice, especially how you have interwoven a nice background story for the younger years of Naruto.i was quite astonishd that you described another shinobi prodigy who should become ANBU captain at age thirteen other than Uchiha Itachi (who if Naruto is 8 has already committed the Uchiha massacre.) wonder what he is able of. The order of Named in japanese is the other way round, so Hyuuga Hinata instead of the other wa. I am interested in katsuragi too, I wonder whethe Kakashi (Kitsune ANBU!)will try something there, but a family sounds nice for Naruto. I really loved how you displyed the Sandaime reding Icha Icha. Making Morino sweat!! I hope you update sooner than in a monthe for this is one evil cliffie.About the Jutsu names..., if existing jutsu`s are used, then you can find their names on Narutopedia.com (I think, just google). Otherwise I wouldn`t mind betaìng the story. though reading the first chapter, I must say I never reall saw much of any mistakes, other than one, two smallish things. Your stle is nice though a bit aprubt, but these are personal opinions.

This is certainly an interesting beginning to a potentially good story. I am not sure what kind of rating I could really give it as of just the first chapter, but so far I think it could turn out very well. I have to say that I will give you points right off the bat for having good spelling and grammar. I believe that I would enjoy the continuation of this story. I look forward to your future chapters. Good luck.

This, is, superb. I sit up and beg for more. I'm not too sure if I like your medic-nin OC yet. Some of the methods of development you've used for her so far, I'm sorry but I found them cliche. I think it would've been more interesting if she'd known about who Naruto was and how he was commonly hated, and, indifferently, chosen to help despite the fact, because that's her job, you know, professionalism.
And then of course there's the random nameless guy hitting on her, mega cliche.

But I liked the rest, a lot, really. You handle pre-academy Naruto excellently. And Sarutobi reading Jiraiya's crap made me snort. Oh, on the other hand, I do like the other OC so far, the ANBU. Even though I didn't see his name given anywhere yet, so he might as well be a stock character like that random guy that hit on Yume. I don't like stock characters, except as quick cannon fodder.

I'll be anxiously checking for updates,
Chiao