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June 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Whoa, you changed your penname! No wonder I couldn't find you on the search-for-authors... XD
Your latest two chapters were absolutely- totally- hot. Perfect. If this is what you were hoping for, then you got it bullseye and through. =D You still do a good job of keeping us in the dark about Konan, while giving us a idea of what happened to her and the kind of character you're making Madara (and Deidara) out to be. I'm impressed, pleased, and in love with your writing. I've taken to reading over previous chapters while waiting for the latest. =D keep up the excellent work.
I notice that you do a good job in making the story go at a nice, even pace. You've gone form making Kakashi a reclusive, socially and emotionally withdrawn Jounin into someone who's learned what love and affection can give without making it seem rushed or forced (well, Pein did initiate it and that was a quick movement, but you still made Kakashi hold back and recoil- retaining a bit of his withdrawn edge at that moment. Which was excellent, really.) So far, you've done a really good job at keeping the characters in-character while also manipulating them to your will- something many authors have a lot of difficulty with, escpecially with characters like Pein and Madara. A lot of other authors often make the fall-in-love bit too sudden, to unrealistic in a way- a kiss, then they're both all over each other. But here, you built it up so that Kakashi spent a lot of time with Pein in a neutral environment, then worked in the ground rules for Pein.
excellent!
Your latest two chapters were absolutely- totally- hot. Perfect. If this is what you were hoping for, then you got it bullseye and through. =D You still do a good job of keeping us in the dark about Konan, while giving us a idea of what happened to her and the kind of character you're making Madara (and Deidara) out to be. I'm impressed, pleased, and in love with your writing. I've taken to reading over previous chapters while waiting for the latest. =D keep up the excellent work.
I notice that you do a good job in making the story go at a nice, even pace. You've gone form making Kakashi a reclusive, socially and emotionally withdrawn Jounin into someone who's learned what love and affection can give without making it seem rushed or forced (well, Pein did initiate it and that was a quick movement, but you still made Kakashi hold back and recoil- retaining a bit of his withdrawn edge at that moment. Which was excellent, really.) So far, you've done a really good job at keeping the characters in-character while also manipulating them to your will- something many authors have a lot of difficulty with, escpecially with characters like Pein and Madara. A lot of other authors often make the fall-in-love bit too sudden, to unrealistic in a way- a kiss, then they're both all over each other. But here, you built it up so that Kakashi spent a lot of time with Pein in a neutral environment, then worked in the ground rules for Pein.
excellent!
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June 7, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Oh my god! You naughty, wicked girl!!!! That was beautiful. Lovely! I'm not sure how hot you wanted that to turn out, but by god, it was hot as hell! I'm gonna miss these guys together sooooo much. I know there's still alot to look forward to, but Kisame was amazing. I loved his perception of Itachis fate. Thanks so much for all you're doing with this. Can't wait for more. Love ya bunches...Beth
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June 3, 2009 at 12:00 AM
So sorry I haven't been able to review- nearly the end of school, so busy, so many things to do, and all that stuff.
I get it- it the plot part of this just reared it's ugly head. It wasn't planned. But hey, I actually like it better this way- five times more interesting and opportunistic. I like!
I stil can't quite figure out where you're going with this- which basically means 'good fucking job!' from me, because if I can accurately predict, then the story probably needs some originality. =D So keep it up, it rocks!
The meeting between Kakashi and the /real/ Pain was to be expected, but I was surprised by the way kakashi reacted. He reacted the way I hadn somewhat predicted he would two chapters later when he went to apologize to Pein, (you caught me completely off guard) =D
But honestly, you never DO make things easy for your characters, do you? It's like a game of Boshaft and lucky breaks. Which is what I love about your writing, because all stories I read with pairings usually have sappy sappy romance junk that makes me want to puke. I mean, where's the real conflict? So basically, I love that you torture your characters a bit, but that you don't make them entirely miserable. Just the right balance. ^_^
Basically, keep going, and I'm waiting desperately for chapter 49.
=D
I get it- it the plot part of this just reared it's ugly head. It wasn't planned. But hey, I actually like it better this way- five times more interesting and opportunistic. I like!
I stil can't quite figure out where you're going with this- which basically means 'good fucking job!' from me, because if I can accurately predict, then the story probably needs some originality. =D So keep it up, it rocks!
The meeting between Kakashi and the /real/ Pain was to be expected, but I was surprised by the way kakashi reacted. He reacted the way I hadn somewhat predicted he would two chapters later when he went to apologize to Pein, (you caught me completely off guard) =D
But honestly, you never DO make things easy for your characters, do you? It's like a game of Boshaft and lucky breaks. Which is what I love about your writing, because all stories I read with pairings usually have sappy sappy romance junk that makes me want to puke. I mean, where's the real conflict? So basically, I love that you torture your characters a bit, but that you don't make them entirely miserable. Just the right balance. ^_^
Basically, keep going, and I'm waiting desperately for chapter 49.
=D
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May 30, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I have such a hard time with your Kakashi,
that's what I like about this story:)
thanks.
that's what I like about this story:)
thanks.
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May 28, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Oh bloody hell! I have been waiting for this for weeks. It turned out so effin hot! I didn't expect a lemon! I was glad to see Nagato being able to use his hands in the manga the other day. So he was able to touch Kakashi. This was so sweet. I'm going to be re-reading this and probably thinking about it for the rest of the day. I felt a pang of anxiety when Pein told Kakashi he would be leaving soon as well. That is going to be one tearful departure. So, we need just a little more of the awesome foursome to help us make it through to the end. Love ya sweetie! Look forward to talking with you soon.
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May 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH! Kakashi was NOT supposed to do that!!!!! Oh well, I know it will all work out. I guess turn-about is fair play. After what Pein said to him about Itachi and Kisame. I am so glad to see Itachi care so much. I know you don't think you have him in character, but you really do. He's a man of little words. And he accepts no bullshit from others. He saw a problem, and he's getting to the heart of the matter. Itachi really hates trouble in the only family he has now. He just has to protect his precious people. And he would never blame Kakashi, he just knows that the communication lines have to be opened again. Thanks for all your hard work, and I'm glad to see that you are still safe and sound. Love ya girl! Beth
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May 24, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Yes, this is it! I was mistaken earlier today when you asked if I had read the latest chap...I hadn't read this one yet. So good! How awful and painful were the words said to Kakashi. I wanted to cry. I'm so glad they made up, and it was a brilliant touch to have Itachi "screech" anything. I loved it! Thanks for all your hard work. I will be worried about you till I hear from you again. I hope everything is ok on your side of the world. Love ya girl...Beth
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May 23, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I'm almost, just almost very slightly, disappointed with the threesome, but not by much. I was sort of hoping for something with a foursome or a little kinky, but it was still very good. Nevertheless, probably one of my favorite chapters, next to 17 and 32-33. I thought the way you portrayed Uchiha Madara to be a little strange, since you've so far done a good job in keeping people most In-Character, but it was still pretty good, and the direction you're going intrigues me. I'm bouncing on the balls of my feet waiting for the next chapter! Keep up the good work. =D
I'm also wondering if you'll have another scene between the three/four of them again? I'm hoping so, because I've never found a single kaka/pein/kisa/ita anywhere else on the internet - except for one kisa/ita/kaka, but the writing was awful.
Again, keep up the good work! =D
I'm also wondering if you'll have another scene between the three/four of them again? I'm hoping so, because I've never found a single kaka/pein/kisa/ita anywhere else on the internet - except for one kisa/ita/kaka, but the writing was awful.
Again, keep up the good work! =D
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May 23, 2009 at 12:00 AM
oh and Yuki - Kakashi did more than think about it! cool, ne?!
---
Well, I can't deny that and we all knew it was coming (XD), but it was with his Lover's consent. And it didn't include Hidan, Kakuzu, Deidara, Sasori (that would be weird, but hot, even though he's already dead by this time. =/ I know, I'm a freak.), or even one of the kitchen maids (sorry, bad humor, bad humor.) It only involved Kisame and Itachi, and that was really after Pein drove Kakashi nuts in the cave with those vivid descriptions. Right?
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May 23, 2009 at 12:00 AM
I look forward to the conversation:)
thank you.
thank you.