rate_review Reviews

aww sasuke and naruto are so cute! so i take it naruto can see ghosts

Awww, no praise necessary. But that doesn't mean I'll refuse it. ;))

Lovely continuation of the complicated nature of Sasuke and Naruto's partnership. I love how Sasuke inevitably protected Naruto from the skepticism and ridicule should he have been found out with that extra power. I love that Naruto is seemingly oblivious to its true nature. It seems so like his character, both from the manga nad in this story. I love how you pulled in Chiyo and in such understated almost desperation. I felt sorry for her despite what she may very well have done to Sasori, well, before his presumed death, and despite the fact that she seems to mistrust strangers so much given her reaction to finding Naruto out and about at night. I happen to think there may be more to it, perhaps that she has some idea of what may be living in her Inn besides her.
I really enjoyed that there was still some understated suspense, so indicative of all great suspense/horror writers/directors. 'You shouldn't be here.' thuogh so simple a warning, is so chilling. And the fact that Naruto doesn't fully understand the meaning because he doesn't fully understand his gift is a grand foreshadowing effect. I also enjoyed Sasuke's refusal to believe in the full impact of what Naruto could do, even when faced with it in his own house adn with his own mother, instead choosing to think of Naruto as some untrustworthy snoop. heh heh
One last thing before I end my evaluation. I have every confidence in you both in being able to continue with the light-hearted ribbing between them and the growing arousal of Naruto and his burgeoning discovery fo his feelings. I am interested, more than interested considering how I feel about this story and your prowess with supernatural/suspense/horror, to see if Sasuke recognizes the growth and either answers in kind or even just seeing how he reacts. So, without further flounces, ribbons or bells, I'll leave you two to write, and write fast. Please?

Cupricanka, I'm dying for an update @_____@

*bows to you*

Liiked the sparring.tempoès slow;y building.Leans towards hyperbole a bit.

;____; noooooo
I need moreee!! This is such a good story! I'll admit that I was skeptical at first, but you totally won me over.
I really wanna read more. 9-9
Update?

oh, this is going to be good.... :) waiting :)

Loved it!!! You got the tension between Sasuke and Naruto so perfect that I grinned the whole time and I could imagine them acting that way towards each other while still being partners. I loved Tsunade's insight and attitude, not too soft and all about tough love, but kinda disappointed that she's not covertly taking part on the drinking bet somehow. The little spar that Naruto and Sasuke had... for some reason I kept imagining some sort of erotic pose (down gutter down) I liked reading Sasuke's very detailed insight on Naruto's actions (really, that should be a give away to him that there's something there). The game in the rain, usually when that happens, I imagine some cute teenagers laughing all the way to the door but thinking about two policemen doing it... ouch. DX

This quote made me smile so much - "She couldn’t tell her employees ‘because, although we know it’s not exactly ethical, we all just want you two to fuck and get it over with’." - cause seriously, with how much they do go after each other's throat, it'd be easy for everyone in the force to see how much they want to jump each other's bones. XD

Waiting with anticipation to know more about the case they're working on (WTF ebil Asuma and Konohamaru?!) and who'd act first, and how you guys would handle them being "unwilling" lovers. Also... ahaha... Sasuke... your Naruto-sexuality is showing already. Xd

Can't wait for Sasuke to describe Naruto's physique or vice-versa. Curious on what details he'd pick up. And I wanna know why Naruto doesn't want anything on his record... :\

Some corrections/suggestions:

-of course, but not even one child was ever found.- This last part sounds so awkward for some reason. >_<
{{but not a single child was found? but not even one child was found? but not one child has ever been found?}}

-but no proof {was} strong enough to prosecute.

-as if to say that he would have done that, too. - don't think there's a need for the last comma. :)

-The cash of the day was taken, but also some products which they thought could be sold later, - change 'but' to 'and.'

-so that must be the case now, too. - I don't think too is needed?

-He took off the pads and threw him at Naruto one by one. - threw {{them}} at Naruto

-but it didn’t erase Sasuke’s face that was flickering on and off in front Naruto’s eyes, like broken light.-
{{didn't erase Sasuke's face that was, flickering on and off in front of Naruto's eyes, like a broken light.}}

-Maybe it was the downpour and the lack of sunlight and gloom that always went with such weather.-
{{Maybe it was the downpour, lack of sunlight, and gloom that always went with such weather.}}

-Naruto stretched back to reach one of our suitcases, and Sasuke did the same. From the fugitive little glance Sasuke let escape Naruto had pretty good reason to believe he was just as aware of how their arms brushed against each other in the small space. -
{{Naruto stretched back to reach one of their suitcases and Sasuke did the same. From the fugitive little glance Sasuke let escape, Naruto had}}

- In was all so crazy and they had to get used to the idea of sleeping in the same bed it if they meant to catch any sleep that night.-
{{It was all so crazy and they had to get used to the idea of sleeping in the same bed if they meant to catch any sleep at night.}}

LOL sorry for the long list. And can't wait for the next chapter. ;)

Ooh, interesting... I like it :) Good lenght of the chapter, and good spelling, and such an interesting story. :) like it.

heylo!!


this was an interesting start. i loved the fight scene! wow, you guys can really write action well!! *jealous* it was perfect. the tension between them was funny and hot.

though can i ask one question? if they are so against (pretending to be at least, lol) going undercover as lovers, why aren't they just disobeying tsunade. like agreeing with her and then doing the opposite once they reach? the only reason that she gave them was so they got along better but neither she nor anyone from their department is going to be in that town.. so no body will know right? how come they haven't thought of that? or did i just miss something?

hm, thats all. im sorry for bringing that up..*hides* update soon or i will hound both of you on y gall.. *be very afraid..lol*

Ah, it's here! Just when I was getting bored with ff.net too. Lucky! And thanks for the compliment and the fic rec.

Whee, so a review. I love the Naruto/Sasuke banter. I especially loved the fight scene. It was spot on the best I've read in a fanfiction. There was no confusion as to what was happening when and the style was very realistic in their reactions to each other and their movements, but I've said that before. And, that ending, from the light, witty banter to that suspense, was classic horror tale greatness. I felt like I was watching a great noir film, or Hitcock, the only master of all things scary. I can't wait to see how this tale will develop, from an afficianado standpoint. I also love that the characters, Sasuke and Naruto, suddenly realize they may be way out of their depth in that they went in expecting to face a standard psycho and now may be dealing with something entirely different. And the factor of at least Sasuke's sexuality coming into question adds an aggrivating twist, for him, and a delightful mix of drama and horro for me. Can't wait for more.

PS Now it's my turn to spoil YOU, it seems. ;P