rate_review Reviews

Fight scenes are among the most difficult things to write even without supernatural elements such as in Canon. I was able to visualize the aborted back breaking scene, but only a vague picture for the rest. I was able to use my imagination to fill in the blanks, but you might want to consider looking into how screenwriters write fight scenes.

As for the boy while there was a part of me hoping it would be Ranmaru given the title for future chapters and the fact that he checked to see what Zabuza was doing I'm guessing it's Haku. Oh well at least I get to keep that market cornered.

You describe the fight much better from outside looking in than from either of the competitors points of view.

Chapter 23 This chapter above everything else really emphasized how messed up the whole cat thing is. I hope you were going for that. By emphasizing how casual it is really drove that point home.

Chapter 24 started off well enough, but once the violence started to break out it got confusing and not in a good way.

I never thought I would see the day when Haku had a change of heart over Itachi. Itachi, the man who made him dress up like Sasuke when they fucked, and who cut his throat for no reason and left him for dead. This is a miracle.

I have a stunningly sexy visual in my head of Itachi dancing the tango with Haku. Thank you for putting it there!

My hero~! You saved Itachi. And with a Tango. Go you~!!!!!

Every time I try to picture Itachi and Haku dancing the tango my brain malfunctions. How in the world can you picture something so amazingly epic.
The threesome was an amazing idea. I wouldn't have wanted Ita-chan to be left out :)

.......wow...i'm speechless..this is...really good...as always i wait for your next wonderful update

Man this chapter made me cry....good of Haku to speak of redemption...

Ok you've gone and made me cry. I love that Itachi is being given these chances to redeem himself. And I feel so bad for him but Haku is right. This story has really come along way and gets better and better with each update. =D Love it!