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January 11, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I think that you need to redo this paragraph.
She then tore off Naruto’s pants and boxers to reveal Naruto’s hard appendage. She eyed it like she did a new weapon. He was much nigger than Neji definitely. How she knew this was she snuck a peek of the Hyuga prodigy when he went to take a tinkle. He was adequate that was it though. She didn’t dare to even take a look at what Lee looked like. She already had a pretty good idea with him wearing that green spandex all the time.
Since you put "He was much nigger than Neji definitely."
She then tore off Naruto’s pants and boxers to reveal Naruto’s hard appendage. She eyed it like she did a new weapon. He was much nigger than Neji definitely. How she knew this was she snuck a peek of the Hyuga prodigy when he went to take a tinkle. He was adequate that was it though. She didn’t dare to even take a look at what Lee looked like. She already had a pretty good idea with him wearing that green spandex all the time.
Since you put "He was much nigger than Neji definitely."
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January 11, 2014 at 12:00 AM
I really wish you'd stop character bashing in your chapters because I consider that one of the lowest forms of fanfiction writing and I stop reading chapters at that spot like in chapter 60 that ruined the entire chapter for me.
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January 11, 2014 at 12:00 AM
The Sakura bashing ruined this chapter, which is a shame because it otherwise was above decent. Only massive cunts bash characters in fanfics, especially considering the Sakura chapters in your story are actually the better ones compared to the others.
You should rewrite this chapter to get rid of the bashing and Sakura a more plausible excuse for not being there, so you don't seem like a massive douchebag.
You should rewrite this chapter to get rid of the bashing and Sakura a more plausible excuse for not being there, so you don't seem like a massive douchebag.
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January 10, 2014 at 12:00 AM
You should do another sequel to this, this time with a time skip, around the time Naruto returns from his training trip and Sakura expecting him to greet her, instead he greets his three girlfriends.
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December 25, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Requesting RTN Hinata, Mito Uzumaki, and Mabui.
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October 21, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Hmm...you ever thought of doing one of these with the RTN versions of the good females? Heck, you could even do that with Menma instead of Naruto as it IS an alterante world. But that's just an idea you are free to use if you want to.
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October 6, 2013 at 12:00 AM
I REALLY ant a sequel to this Chapter, It's one of my faves of all in this story.
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October 5, 2013 at 12:00 AM
Your quality has dropped so much. Last few chapters have been pure crap. Especially the orgy.
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October 5, 2013 at 12:00 AM
just amazing
could you make a chap with shion or shizuka??
could you make a chap with shion or shizuka??
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September 29, 2013 at 12:00 AM
You should do one for Kurotsuchi and more female kunoichi like Fu, Mabui or Shizuka