rate_review Reviews

Chapter 47 was awesome. If you make a sequel to it I think it should be Hinata, Hanabi and Hitomi.

Liked the use of clones in 43 and 44, but I'm disappointed that there was no DP. Why is this story tagged for several things that never seem to come up, like DP and Anal? That's what I'm looking for!

you should turn this chapter and the first one with tamari into its own story

This is a general review for this fic and your HP(brainy girls) fic; I've noticed you started using an AU/real-life setting for some of your new chapters and all I can think is that your are running out of ideas (pretty reasonable all things considered).

Another thing is that your chapters seem to be slimming down, there's no mini-build-up anymore , now it's just straight to the sex and nothing else.

Some of the newer chapters are kind of lacking for the most part. Sure, delivery complete on who Naruto is paired with for the chapter but the dialogue is poor and the descriptions are nearly verbatim of almost every other chapter in both fics when it comes to the actual sex.

I hope you are able to gain a new sense of creativity to bring a little bit more to these chapters. Perhaps creating new scenarios in which Naruto ends up having sex with the chapter-girl

fix your fucking line spacing. srsly.

How about an obscure Kunoichi suggestion...

Karenbana from the third movie...

Well so far I'm enjoying these little one-shots of yours the only complaint I have is try to refrain from character bashing as that's one of the chidish things to do while writing and I hate that. Also I skip chapters with characters like Hanabi mainly because they are WAY too young generally for this kind of thing unless it's when they are older.

If you take requests how about a few teaming up ones like with Sakura/Hinata, Sakura/Ino, Sakura/Hinata/Karin with Naruto? Plus I don't think you did Karin yet and I think she could be a nice one. For plots how about he has to rebuild his clan (which can be used for several girls) and is trying to get them pregnant during sex. I forget if you've done any light bondage with either the girl in charge or Naruto. You know like tied to the bed while being teased (blindfold optional so the person has to guess what's happening to them). Maybe even a few role play chapters.

seriously, everytime I read your stories it reminds me of how much I love the inspiration it gave me. also, why not do a Naruto/Shizune/Tsunade chapter? everyone loves that one. or maybe Tsunade could give Sakura some extra lessons

Awesome! Love it! Get Naruto to have a threesome with Anko and Kurenai!

i think naruto should try it with karin since she is an uzumaki