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March 26, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Make Kurenai next and what are the pairings here? Make it a harem
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March 25, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Excellent chapter, cant wait to read more. Please tell me if you can or wont write a small lemon for me. But keep up the good work
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March 25, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Great chapter. It's good to see this updated. Naruto has added Tsunami to the rotation. Now I can't wait to see Tenten and Tayuya. It would be hot if Naruto had Tayuya as a live in maid/pet.
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March 25, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Your really good to you take request or commissions?
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March 25, 2015 at 12:00 AM
I honestly hope Naruto gets a second time with Hinata when she's awake and willing, he seems to enjoy his time with Hana and Tsunami more than his times with Ino and Ibara and regrets his actions with Hinata.
I'm loving the Thief style of Naruto, lifting everything he can. Will he keep the bow and arrow Tsunami gave him and start making trick arrows like in the games???
I'm loving the Thief style of Naruto, lifting everything he can. Will he keep the bow and arrow Tsunami gave him and start making trick arrows like in the games???
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January 10, 2015 at 12:00 AM
Hn. Got to say good porn. Terrible villain protagonist development. Your justification for them run hollow both in the poor set up for their allowance, and the poor use of criminalistic justifications that run counter to canon character development that you have going on in the background.
He's also got this string of hypocrisy in here and your other story that's poor in how obvious it is and more importantly how easily it can be destroyed by people he respects by relating things to his nindo, knowledge of psychology and basic equivalency.
I mean here it's more than obvious that way too much of how village veiws was solidly earned and justified. I mean his victims start out with a nice girl who was never mean to him. Friend whose scorn was earned and justified. And someone utterly powerless to fight back even if he'd done it while she was awake. The last one is bad and it cracks you're saving throw but he turns in traitors to show his loyalty in half.
Building a good villain protagonist out of a hero requires a gentle escalation crimes, good justification, and utter lack of sympathy to the victims until investment is developed and a fall from grace moment won't rip you from his side.
I don't think you managed that here. In the other story it is somewhat more forgivable and less. More in that that naruto was manipulated in his youth by an authority figure (who probably shouldn't have gotten the chance but porn) And less because he ran into other authority figures at times to raise red flags and who had ways to easily break his argument with things like "I guess your nindo is meaningless and loyalty worthless." I mean a keep your word nindo is worthless when you regularly betray the trust of comrades and help them break their marriage vows and take potshots at people who like and acknowledge you. Ya know?
But here he start with a Hinata who was being nice to him and fainted. Continues to an ino who calls him out on bullshit from pure knowledge and not bias that he admits and move on to someone who does have bias but who has it more than supported and in this specific case is more than kinda in the right when it comes to appearances. What happened to naruto did not just appear to be favoritism it kinda actually was a text book definition of it even taking in the extenuating circumstances that basically boil down to him being too gullible without sasuke's serial mindfucks.
He's also got this string of hypocrisy in here and your other story that's poor in how obvious it is and more importantly how easily it can be destroyed by people he respects by relating things to his nindo, knowledge of psychology and basic equivalency.
I mean here it's more than obvious that way too much of how village veiws was solidly earned and justified. I mean his victims start out with a nice girl who was never mean to him. Friend whose scorn was earned and justified. And someone utterly powerless to fight back even if he'd done it while she was awake. The last one is bad and it cracks you're saving throw but he turns in traitors to show his loyalty in half.
Building a good villain protagonist out of a hero requires a gentle escalation crimes, good justification, and utter lack of sympathy to the victims until investment is developed and a fall from grace moment won't rip you from his side.
I don't think you managed that here. In the other story it is somewhat more forgivable and less. More in that that naruto was manipulated in his youth by an authority figure (who probably shouldn't have gotten the chance but porn) And less because he ran into other authority figures at times to raise red flags and who had ways to easily break his argument with things like "I guess your nindo is meaningless and loyalty worthless." I mean a keep your word nindo is worthless when you regularly betray the trust of comrades and help them break their marriage vows and take potshots at people who like and acknowledge you. Ya know?
But here he start with a Hinata who was being nice to him and fainted. Continues to an ino who calls him out on bullshit from pure knowledge and not bias that he admits and move on to someone who does have bias but who has it more than supported and in this specific case is more than kinda in the right when it comes to appearances. What happened to naruto did not just appear to be favoritism it kinda actually was a text book definition of it even taking in the extenuating circumstances that basically boil down to him being too gullible without sasuke's serial mindfucks.
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December 31, 2014 at 12:00 AM
hey! I'M loving the series a LOT! would you mind adding Konan as well at some point? And a bit more anal action?
Keep it up!
Keep it up!
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October 31, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Nice! I look forward to the next chapter. Have you thought of doing a story that features mainly on Anko using Naruto and the other genin as her playthings?
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June 16, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Don't you think that Hana will brag about Naruto's talent which would allow him to sample several curious and high Level Kunoichi? Heck, some of them might even do him simply to have a breeding stud and get pregnant. What? Same couple relationship exist too.
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June 5, 2014 at 12:00 AM
Non-smut parts were just as good as smut ones. Have you thought of making a separate fic that would be a bit more consistent on the matter of sneaking, stealing, pranking Naru-thief?
I am a bit disturbed by your latest victim decision, not only because canon Haku was cross-dressing male, though, well, you couldn't help but think that something wrong with her even before reveal. While male Haku could be forcibly saved and befriend of Naruto(-ko, if straight smut is necessary), female Haku would be crushing on Zabuza, the only being that matters in her world, straight to the point of dying with him. FemHaku with Naruto would be like Hinata with Sasuke(there are such fics, though). And I couldn't guess how this Naruto could get a drop on sleeping Haku beforehand, as no matter how good he is, Haku is still better by this point.
Tsunami would be all right, though.
I am a bit disturbed by your latest victim decision, not only because canon Haku was cross-dressing male, though, well, you couldn't help but think that something wrong with her even before reveal. While male Haku could be forcibly saved and befriend of Naruto(-ko, if straight smut is necessary), female Haku would be crushing on Zabuza, the only being that matters in her world, straight to the point of dying with him. FemHaku with Naruto would be like Hinata with Sasuke(there are such fics, though). And I couldn't guess how this Naruto could get a drop on sleeping Haku beforehand, as no matter how good he is, Haku is still better by this point.
Tsunami would be all right, though.