True Directions

True Directions


A/N: This is based off the movie 'But I'm A Cheerleader!' In this chapter I used a line or two from the movie but the upcoming chapters won't resemble the movie at all...for one the movie is told from a girl's perspective.

WARNING:There will be bad language!The subject is rather volatile so if you have a real problem with homosexuality-bashing and stereotypes I suggest you go read something else. It's one of those 'well I'm gay so I can say it' situations because the kids are interacting with each other in this matter.

Otherwise, I hope you have fun and comments are appreciated!

*True Directions-Chapter One*

Step One- Admitting You Have a Problem

“But I’m a football player.” Naruto said, feeling his stomach drop down to his ankles. “I have a girlfriend…I…right, Sakura?”

Sakura frowned in that sugary sweet way of hers and then smiled.
“Honey, we’ve been together for five months and you haven’t even tried for second base.”

“And, uh…” Kiba scratched his head and blushed, “You’ve got pictures of half-naked guys pasted all over your locker, dude. That’s not exactly normal.”

“And you suck on your pens.” Konohamaru made a face, as if it pained him to even bring the subject up. “A lot.”

Naruto looked to his parents for some kind of support and his dad held his life-sized pillow of Wolverine, frayed from long use as a comfortable body pillow.

“It was okay when you were ten,” Minato sighed, looking very tired, “You’re nearly seventeen, Naru.”

His mother put a hand on his knee and leaned close, her eyes shining with unshed tears.

“Darling, we just want the best for you.”

“We all want the best for you.” Sakura interceded, looking a little misty-eyed herself as she flipped long, pink hair. Konohamaru and Kiba looked over Naruto’s shoulder and murmured something that sounded vaguely supportive as Naruto stared at them all in total bewilderment.

“But I’m a football player,” He insisted again, searching for an understanding face. He found none, only his parents smiling grimly and looking determined.

“There’s a program,” His mother said, taking Minato’s hand. His father sighed again and looked away from them all, the slump in his shoulders making him seem very old. “We can fix this, Naruto.”

It was the look on his father’s face that finally sealed the deal, and even though every part of him continued to protest Naruto nodded and then bowed his head to conceal his own, watering eyes. There was an uncertain guilt running through him, and a heavy dose of betrayal that took the will to fight out of him in one sucker punch of emotion.

All he’d ever wanted to do was make his father proud, and now Minato wouldn’t even look at Naruto, not even when Naruto whispered, “Dad, please-”

Minato just stood and left the room, taking Naruto’s stupid stuffed toy with him.

“Come on.” Kushina patted him again and took Naruto’s shoulder in a painful grip, pulling him up from the couch. Even his loving, gentle, mother had been pushed too far, Naruto realized miserably, and he didn’t even really understand what he’d done wrong. Like his father, his former teammates wouldn’t make eye contact, but Sakura looked up briefly, and what Naruto saw there was enough to make him take a step back in shock. He had never imagined that her beautiful face was capable of such blatant disgust and hate.

His mother just dragged him forward, opened the front door, and practically chucked him out. Naruto was left to stand bewildered on the front steps as she shoved a duffel bag into his hands and pushed him not so gently down the steps.

“If you love us at all, you’ll come back normal.” She whispered softly, eyes hard. “Any more of this…perversion will send your father to an early grave. Do you understand?”

“But-” Naruto was ashamed to find his voice choked with tears. Real men didn’t cry, did they? His mother’s eyes narrowed and she whispered harshly, “That’s not going to work anymore, Naruto. Go with these people and get fixed, or don’t come home.”

Then she grabbed him by the arm to stand in the driveway in front of a van Naruto could barely see through the haze of tears. And when she left she left him alone, slamming the door behind him.

The van door opened and a man stepped out, peering down at Naruto’s slumped, shaking body with disdain clear on his face.

“Well, get in.” He snapped. “I don’t have all day.”

The man took the bag out of Naruto’s arms with a quick wrench and Naruto was left with nothing, standing defenseless in front of what used to be a sanctuary, his home. He stepped in side gingerly, his hands shaking too much to even fasten his belt as he stared forward in shock, feeling as if he were walking through a nightmare and hoping to god he was.

Just before the door was slammed shut behind him Naruto took one last look at his house in time to see the curtains of the front room swing shut as his father’s form turned ephemeral through lace and Naruto’s quickly blinking eyes.

And then they drove away and everything was gone. Just gone.
Four hours later Naruto found himself stumbling out into the middle of nowhere, brush and dirt roads surrounding an old Victorian house that was both surreal and alarming. The house was painted in lines of bright blue and a nearly electric pink that made Naruto wince and wish he still had his duffel bag to cling to. He’d tried to keep his eyes on the road signs, but could honestly admit that he would be hopelessly lost were he try to escape back home. But was that even home anymore?

A woman walked down the driveway dressed in the blinding pink of the crazy house and smiled like she was actually glad to see that Naruto was there. Naruto returned her smile weakly and followed her firm grip inside, happy to get away from the driver’s scowling face as he leaned up against the bright blue van.

The woman’s office reminded him of Tsunade and Naruto felt such a fierce stab of loneliness that he hugged himself and bowed his head away. He wondered if anyone would tell his principal why their star quarterback had suddenly disappeared or simply blame his absence on mono.

“…and until you do, you must wear these instead of regular clothing.” The woman continued, being firmly friendly as she shoved over what looked to be a green hospital garment. “The first step is the most important. Neji!”

A guy about Naruto’s age came into the office and stared for a moment before gesturing Naruto to follow, his scrubs and confusion in hand.

They were in finals at school and he’d been nominated as homecoming king…how could his parents and his friends explain Naruto’s absence with anything but the truth? Neji didn’t speak as he took Naruto on a wandering tour through the grounds, only murmuring the most basic of instructions.

“This is where you will sleep,” He said, his voice nearly hollow as he gestured to a room of monochrome blue. “No inappropriate behavior is allowed.”

Naruto took in the five beds, neatly made and wrapped up in plastic like a Twinkie and clutched his new clothes to his chest. There was already another boy in the room. He was lying on his back and smoking with a gaze of extreme boredom.

“Inappropriate…Like swearing?” Naruto asked. If he had to go through with this mess, he figured, he might as well get the rules down and do it as painlessly as possible. The boy on the bed finally looked over to them both, his dark eyes flashing in the twisted mockery of a smile.

“Inappropriate like fucking,” He drawled, taking a long drag, “Get caught gobbling cock and it’s au revoir, idiot.”

Naruto blushed so hard he felt a little faint looking into the boy’s dark eyes.

“Oh.” Naruto whispered, swallowing. “I…oh.”

Up until this point it had all seemed a dream, but this stranger’s casual bluntness brought Naruto spiraling back to the reality where he was in a creepy Victorian house because everyone he loved thought he was lacking, perverted, and fundamentally wrong, when Naruto still really had no idea what he’d done.

The dark-haired boy just rolled his eyes and pulled a magazine out from under his pillow and Naruto wanted to cling to him, he wanted to ask ‘do you see it? Can you see the wrongness in me?’ but Neji grabbed Naruto by the arm and shoved him in the bathroom with a curt order to just get changed.

Naruto laughed a little then, with his head pressed up against the closed door, because change, well, that’s why he was here in the first place wasn’t it? And he’d do it too, he’d change in a second if it meant he could be back home sharing dinner with his parents, playing catch with his friends, goofing off with his dad, but how could he change when he couldn’t understand what was wrong with him?
Naruto indulged in a few more frustrated, angry tears before sloughing off the shell of his old life and donning the new, antiseptic green.

-

They sat around him in a semi-circle. Four boys, five girls, Kurenai, and all of them were staring at Naruto like he was something fascinating; like a new species of animal at the zoo. Neji was there, looking as uninterested as usual, and the boy from the bedroom, Sasuke, was tucked into a chair and staring along with the rest. There was a redhead, Gaara, all decked out in chains and goth paint, and Lee, whose bowl cut and eyebrows were strangely captivating. The girls introduced themselves as Ten Ten, Ino, Hinata, Tayuya, and Moegi. Each of them stood up in turn to give their names before stating an interest and the fact…the fact that they were homosexuals.

“Nice to meet you.” Naruto replied, even though it wasn’t. He’d rather be anywhere in the world but under they eyes of such a hungry looking group.

“The first step is admitting your problem.” Kurenai said, leaning forward. She looked a little like a rabid Barbie doll in bright pink and ridiculously high heels. “So, Naruto, it’s time to follow all of these wonderful examples and admit that-”

“But I’m not,” Naruto sat a little straighter and looked her in the eyes, “I’m not a…I’m not gay. This is all some sort of misunderstanding. I like girls. I’m a foot ball player.”

“And I’m sure they love you.” The one named Gaara looked him up and down and winked, licking his lips. Naruto felt a little violated. “I bet you’re the perfect gentleman.”

“It’s easy to be a prude when you’re not interested.” Ino said wryly. She elbowed Hinata and the girl squeaked, “Isn’t that right, Hina?”

“Y-y-y,” Hinata took a deep breath and then looked away, “Of course, Ino.”

Naruto had nothing to say to that because it was true. Sakura was possibly the last virgin on the cheerleading squad due to his slightly squeamish disinterest. He just couldn’t imagine putting any of his body parts near…that place…but that didn’t really help his case as a straight guy, did it?

“It’s called morals,” He snapped back, a little surprised when Hinata cowered away. “Uh, well, I mean-”

She nodded and then blushed, obviously hearing the apology thick in his voice.

“And what do those morals say about checking out guys in the locker room?” Sasuke’s rough voice took control of the room as he watched Naruto with those dark eyes. A smile played on his lips, “Do those morals include checking out your teammates while they shower, watching them while they slip off those jerseys to reveal hard. Toned. Muscle?”

Naruto flushed all the way to his ear tips, as he whispered, “How…”

“I was a jock too. And I can tell you,” Sasuke did smile then, and it was possibly the most lewd thing Naruto had seen in his life, “no one has a better ass than a hockey player, that’s for fucking sure.”

Naruto looked down at his hands, terrified to catch himself agreeing in some smug, sadistic corner of his mind. Worst of all, these words were coming from the mouth of an admitted not-straight-person, and if Naruto’s mind was agreeing wholeheartedly that yes, hockey players generally had the hottest…Naruto realized very suddenly that he might have a bit of a problem.

“I…I…”Naruto whispered, wiping the cold tears from his cheeks, “Doesn’t everyone think like that? I mean-”

He looked up helplessly to see the male side of the group nodding enthusiastically and the female side looking bored and unimpressed with Naruto’s big gay epiphany. Kurenai leaned in and smiled like a cat with an excess of cream, and said, “You know what to do, Naruto.”

And to his horror, his utter dismay, Naruto did know what to do. He looked down at his shaking hands, at the body that betrayed him, and whispered in disgust and profound guilt the secret his mind had been keeping from him for seventeen years.

“I’m a homosexual.”

**Step Two – Finding Your Root.**

Real clothes didn’t make Naruto feel any better. Surrounded by the plastic blue and pink and the gender-specific activities…street clothes felt more like dress up, really, than a privilege. Day two found Naruto feeling like some sort of Ken doll trapped in the endless horror of Barbie’s mansion.

“Hey, Idiot.” Sasuke hadn’t been awake more than five minutes and he already had a cigarette hanging off his lips, “Don’t make the fucking bed. The dykes do that.”

Naruto flushed and dropped the pillow he’d been fluffing.

“You shouldn’t say that.”

“It’s true.” Sasuke smirked. “Fag.”

The heat of Naruto’s blush turned into something else as he stood.
“You better be asking for another cigarette.”

“Or what?” He took another drag and blew the smoke in Naruto’s face, “You’re going to make physical contact? Put your hands all over my body and roll around on the floor?”

Sasuke took a step closer and Naruto’s anger dissolved into an odd thrill, the fluster of not knowing what to do but wanting to do something. And Sasuke, the bastard, seemed to know it too. The apathetic line of Sasuke’s lips tilted into a smirk as he leaned forward, close enough that the hair on Naruto’s arms stood up when another smoky breath ran over his jaw. Naruto tried to back up but there was nowhere to go. The back of his legs hit the edge of the bed so suddenly that he had to put a hand down to not fall over.

Sasuke’s dark eyes turned sharp and terribly knowing, and the weight of his regard was like the run of cold fingers against Naruto’s flesh, making him shiver as he arched away. 

“What’s wrong, straight boy? Do I get you worked up?” Sasuke murmured. “Make your heart race and your dick-”

Naruto grabbed the corner of his pillow and slammed it into Sasuke’s face hard enough that Sasuke overbalanced, hit the side of the bed, and sat hard on the floor.

“Ha!” Naruto threw the pillow in Sasuke’s stunned-but-bordering-on-homicidal expression and left the room.

And he made a point of stubbing out the cigarette as went.

-

It turned out that as far as roommates went Sasuke was only the beginning of Naruto’s troubles. They were waiting for their instructor to arrive and he’d changed seats three times before finally ending up next to Neji who made a point of not speaking to him which was really, really fine as far as Naruto was concerned.
He’d started out next to the redhead, Gaara, but that had resulted in way too much creepy staring and a question about handcuffs that said more than Naruto ever wanted to know about Gaara’s sexual habits.

He’d tried Lee next, making casual conversation that rapidly degenerated into alternating sobs and self-motivating slogans. After clawing his way out of a very wet hug Naruto looked over to Sasuke, wondered if he was going to live through the night, and took the seat by Neji, who looked like he was made of stone. Naruto was telling himself that nothing could really be worse and then their instructor arrived…every spandex-covered inch of him.

“WELCOME MANLY YOUTHS!” He flashed a twinkling smile, gave a thumbs up, and announced, “I AM GAI!”

Naruto clapped a hand over his mouth just barely smothering the hysterical laughter. Neji twitched. Gaara continued staring, and Lee smiled like god had just descended to earth and given him a free pass to heaven.

“No fucking kidding.” Sasuke scowled, flicking a smoldering butt into a pile of dried leaves and looking highly put out when it didn’t burst into flame.

“Today we’re going to participate in SPORTS!” Gai continued, ignoring the comment, “MANLY men play a variety of SPORTS including FOOTBALL, SOCCER, and BASEBALL!”

Lee squealed, waving his hands up in the air.

“Today we will concentrate on…” Naruto prayed for football, he knew football, but the same god who had so blessed Lee blew a great big raspberry in Naruto’s face.

“WRESTLING!”

Stupidly, confused by mindless horror, Naruto’s eyes went directly to Sasuke who was already looking in his direction with wide eyes and a pale face. Naruto looked away and kept his eyes on the grass as Gai explained how in Greece young men would shave themselves, oil each other up, and then proceed to ‘pin their youthful opponents to the floor in the spirit of camaraderie and vigorous exercise’.  They wouldn’t be oiling each other up, Gai explained, and they would also not be naked, but Gai planned on doing the second best thing which was…a skintight spandex suit.

Neji stood up, walked back to the house and never came back, leaving Naruto to not-look at Sasuke and pray to avoid Gaara who looked way too interested in teaming up.

“Now,” Gai continued, “find a partner and-”

Naruto was up out of his seat and sitting next to Sasuke before Gai could even finish his sentence, muttering, “I’m sorry about the pillow thing. Truce?”

Sasuke looked like he might decide against homicide, “Whatever.”

“Ah.” Gai looked a bit disoriented for a moment but his grin never faltered, “Youthful enthusiasm! My heart delights in the sight of COMRADERIE and PASSION! Your first step towards success will be a result of those two flowering emotions!”

“Right.” Sasuke sighed and fished out another cigarette, “The last thing any of us needs is more damned passion.”

Sasuke shoved the pack back into his pocket and following the movement Naruto noticed a silver Zippo shining in the grass.

“Oh, I don’t know.” Naruto smiled as he carefully palmed Sasuke’s lighter, “If we concentrate on a goal in sports maybe it’ll help us forget…you know.”

Their instructor kept on with his ‘stoking the fires of hardy young MEN’ speech while Sasuke stared at Naruto until his own smile felt a little plastic. Those eyes…just like the first day they seemed to strip Naruto down until his every thought was exposed to scrutiny.

“I mean, well,” Naruto cleared his throat but didn’t look away, “maybe if we concentrate on sports we won’t have the, um, need to. Uh-”

Sasuke rolled his eyes and pulled out what was apparently a back-up lighter. He stuck the cigarette in his mouth and took a deep drag before exhaling right into Naruto’s face.

“And if I spend enough time sucking down smoke I’ll forget what it feels like to have a dick in my mouth, right? Wake up idiot, this is real life.”

The emotions that the statement produced were varied. There was the annoyance that Sasuke seemed intent on being the most foul-mouthed, insulting bastard Naruto had met, the anger that he was starting to recognize as the precursor of vehement denial, the disappointment of being unable to fool even *himself*…and a stab of unfamiliar emotion that stemmed from the line of Sasuke’s jaw to his pursed lips and the way his thin fingers were stained with nicotine.

Real life, Naruto realized in a whisper of a breath, sometimes provided compensation for all the other awful shit that seemed to be attached to anything worth having. Anything worth wanting.

When Kurenai showed up and cancelled the lesson, Neji fuming by her side, Naruto had to work pretty hard to not look disappointed.

And this time when Sasuke exhaled the air stayed clear.

-

Naruto was busy digging into mac n’ cheese lunch and taking surreptitious glances of Sasuke’s glowering self when something hard was shoved into his back. He nearly choked in a shout of surprise when a sudden, sharp pain hit his skin. He turned, fully prepared to knock his assailant into the floor when he was met by Ino’s mocking smile as she dropped some kind of device onto the table.

“Aversion – Shock therapy.” Her eyes flit to Sasuke and then back, “Keep those thoughts clean, you naughty boy.”

Sasuke looked up from the mess on his plate to Ino, his eyes then sliding to where Hinata was trying to make herself look small at Naruto’s side. Ino followed his eyeline but while Sasuke looked away her eyes stayed, a little of the harshness evaporating out of her expression.

Then she screamed, her hand going to her side in surprise as Naruto put the shocker back down on the table with a glare he felt all the way down to his toes.

A corner of Sasuke’s lips lifted but his smirk was more smug than mocking as he drawled, “Glass houses, Yamanaka.”

Ino looked like she wanted to scream again but all the yelling had brought Kurenai’s errand-boy Ebisu around the side. He peered and they all went silent, attending their food rather than their rivalries. There might be scuffles or harsh words, but when it came down to it everyone knew who the real enemy was.

-

Naruto raised his hand with trepidation as Gai scanned their little group for volunteers. The sports section of their training had been nixed after Neji’s interference so they were on to the next task which, thankfully, he knew something about.

“Ah! Young Naruto!” Gai grinned, easily ignoring Ebisu’s constant glare, “Your youthful fires burn brightly, my friend! You know something about the manly art of a lube job?”

“I, uh.” Naruto did his best not hear the snickers as he blushed, “I fix old cars with my dad.”

“EXCELLENT!” Gai looked a little relieved, “There is nothing more MANLY than engaging in physical labor with an older mentor!”

Lee grinned and pumped his arms in the air, “Yosh!”

Naruto began to regret raising his hand.

“Automobiles are a perfect example of many manly attributes.” Gai sparkled in enthusiasm, “They are POWERFUL, DEPENDABLE, and QUICK to FINISH-” The group winced, “the most CHALLENGING of races! What sort of automobile are you working on Naruto?”

Naruto smiled and for the first time since he arrived at the school it felt real.

“We’re working on this sweet little two-door Mustang. It’s going to be that Ford blue ‘cause that’s the stock color and everything is there. We’ve got the original gas cap, the radio works…” Naruto’s own smile dimmed as he remembered the grin that had lit up his dad’s face at the car show.

“All that’s left is the bumper. My dad is looking for that online,” Naruto’s father who had looked like he wanted to cry as he turned away from his only child, “He had a car just like it when he was my age.”

Naruto ended with his eyes on the ground, blinking away the sting in his eyes.

It had been a really stupid idea to volunteer.  

“Thank you for sharing.” Gai’s voice was a little softer and his smile didn’t quite ping. “Does anyone have another car story to share?”

There was a long silence before an unlikely voice said, “I crashed my brother’s Ferrari into a police station.”

Sasuke flicked his ash in Gaara’s direction with a scowl. “Didn’t hit anyone.”

Gaara looked disappointed.

“I fire-bombed a Honda dealership.” He blinked his green eyes in Gai’s direction, “Hybrids are annoying.”

Everyone looked to Neji who glared and offered a clipped, “We have a driver.”

“I use public transportation!” Lee announced proudly, “We must do our best to safeguard mother earth! Did you know that carbon dioxide levels-”

“Very good Lee!” Gai cut him off, clapping his hands together, “Today we will be working on a truck! Trucks are driven by very manly men! Like FARMERS! And FIREMEN! And CONSTRUCTION WORKERS! And BIG GAME HUNTERS!”

“Extra points if you’ve got dogs in the back and a gun rack” Sasuke muttered. “Fucking rednecks.”

Naruto winced. He’d nearly died in excitement when got his dad’s old F-150 for his sixteenth birthday. The extra space had made it way easier to go camping up in the mountains and since Kiba was his best friend Akamaru was usually in the back trying to catch tree branches or barking his greetings to wide-eyed drivers at the stoplight. And because Naruto had a firearms permit and a love for venison…

“ALSO,” Gai grinned broadly, placing his hands on his hips, “While we work on our TRUCK we will be listening to COUNTRY MUSIC!”

Even Lee’s smile dimmed down into a grimace, and as expressions of disgust rounded the group Naruto wondered what the problem was. As long as you listened to the right artist Country music could be pretty cool. With that in mind…Naruto raised his hand again.

“Can I pick the music station?”

-

“What’s up with the pillow biters?” Tayuya didn’t bother lowering her voice as she elbowed Ino in the side, “Those assholes look like someone broke their hair dryer.”

“Shut it, rug muncher.” Sasuke slammed his tray onto the table with little regard to the food on it. There were little black fingerprints all over the plastic, just like Neji, Gaara, Lee, and even Naruto. The orange soap had mysteriously run out so they had been stuck with an Ivory bar and a butter knife.

Apparently real men didn’t use nailbrushes.

“And what the hell is wrong with your hands?!” Tayuya pushed Sasuke’s tray back and it dumped into Lee’s lap, “You faggots been hitching rides on Hershey highway again?”

Lee stood, shrieking about dry-cleaning and Ten Ten said, “It’s grease. They got to play with the junker in the garage.”

She looked a little wistful, looking down at her own manicured nails with a sigh. They matched the house in pepto bismol pink and had small rhinestones running down the center. The delicate attention to detail looked incongruous up against the girl’s calloused hands, worker’s hands, and they already had chips at the tips.

“Don’t mind Sasuke,” Naruto smiled and got a small smile back, “They took away his cigarettes because of the gasoline. He hasn’t had one for five whole hours.”

“Don’t mind Tayuya.” Ten Ten shrugged, “We had tuna for lunch and she’s jonesing.”

Tayuya raised a finger and left the table with Neji and Lee following close behind. Sasuke rolled his eyes and stuck the complementary toothpick in his mouth.

“Tuna?” Naruto frowned, “What’s fish got to do with anything?”

Ino stared at him for a moment, searching, and then broke out into high peals of laughter. Naruto looked over to what was left of the boy’s section in confusion and was stunned by dual expressions of bemusement; any expression on Gaara’s face was disturbing and Sasuke was about a breath away from a smile. Even Hinata looked a little pole-axed, her pale eyes wide as she made direct eye contact for the first time.

“What?!”

Ten Ten smiled and blushed a little, “That’s what a vagina smells like, Naruto.”

It took a moment for his brain to force those words together into one image, but unfortunately it managed.

“Oh, gross.” Naruto pushed his own tray away, feeling a little sick but still a little fascinated, “Really? You’re not just messing with me?”

“Nope.” Ten Ten took a bite of her sandwich. “It’s the truth, scout’s honor.”

Ino smirked, “Missed the bullet on that one, didn’t you Naruto?”

“Seriously?!” Naruto had never been really squeamish, but ugh, “That’s disgusting. You’ve ruined tuna salad for me forever.”

The visual added with the new olfactory element…just ugh, he’d never appreciate fishing again.

“Don’t let Miss Bitch hear you say that,” Ino warned, her blue eyes sparkling, “Or she’ll have you eating it out of the can.”

“Please stop.” Naruto felt himself going green. “I am happy not knowing, thank you very much.”

“Naruto, you’re adorable,” She grinned, “I’m sure that you’ll make some fag hag very happy. But...” Her grin turned a little evil, “That means you’re a complete virgin, aren’t you? I mean, if you’ve never even gone down on a girl-”

“But why would I do that?” Naruto blushed, “I mean, if I…y’know.”

“If you’re a complete poofter?” Ino leaned forward teasingly and winked, “How do you know you can’t do something if you don’t try? Lots of people can get through it if they’re thinking about something…or someone else.” She looked to Naruto’s right, “Right, Uchiha?”

Something crunched and Naruto turned to see Sasuke spitting out two halves of what had been a whole toothpick, a look of disgust on his face.

“As if I care.”

Then Sasuke stood, walking off into the bushes without even taking what was left of his lunch.

“Drama queen.” Ino muttered, but she looked oddly pleased, whether that Sasuke had gone or that she had caused a reaction, Naruto couldn’t tell, but he did know that he wasn’t ready to hear the end of this particular conversation. He didn’t want an easy way out, a sour make-believe, he wanted to change and listening to Ino certainly wasn’t going to make that transformation any easier.

“Whoops.” Naruto snatched a fruit off the table, “Looks like Sasuke forgot to eat his orange…I’ll just take this to him.”

“Whatever, Blondie.” Ino called to his back, “Give it a couple more days. You’ll understand!”

-

When they went to group therapy Naruto had orange rinds in his pocket an odd, bottomless feeling in stomach. Even though he had ‘admitted’ in their first session he hadn’t actually believed his own words, but like Ino said, with every passing day his future was looking more and more unstable. In high school everything had been simple; he’d graduate, go to the local university on a football scholarship and then marry Sakura once he had his business degree. He’d never once dreamed he’d be sitting in a circle trying to pin down a single event in his life that he could blame his sexuality on.

“I…I can’t think of a root.” The group looked hungry again, but this time Naruto had nothing to give. “I mean I just…maybe I don’t have one?” He looked at Sasuke for some kind of help but Sasuke’s face was unreadable again and he had the eyes of a stranger when he said, “I think the moron knows what his root is…he just doesn’t want to man up.”

The sting of betrayal was alien but it didn’t make the words hurt any less. Just like the buzz of the aversion therapy device Sasuke’s words made him want to lash out and protect himself. With all the frustration and angst surrounding the whole situation anger came easily.

“Well, then what the hell is your root then, bastard?” Naruto leaned forward with a growl, “Inquiring morons want to know.”

Sasuke’s hand came up to his mouth and then hung there when the brunette realized it was empty. There was a moment, quicksilver, that Sasuke looked exposed, staring at his fingers, his hand empty with no cigarette to distract. Then he blinked and it was gone. Sasuke turned the moment into a fist and smirked back.

“Don’t change the subject Naruto,” Sasuke leaned back just enough that the line of his neck was backlit by their campfire and smirked.

Naruto had been enough games to know when he was being goaded, but that didn’t make not reacting any easier. His hand fisted on his knee, and Kurenai said, “No, Sasuke. Perhaps you should remind the group why you are the way you are.”

Sasuke backed down, his body relaxed, his fist splayed into an open fan, but the challenge was still in his eyes.

“All-boy boarding school.” He drawled glibly. “Not a single breast to be found for at least fifty miles.”

Kurenai looked to his right and nodded.

“I was born in San Fran.” Ino added with a shrug, elbowing Neji in the side.

“My father let me wear my hair long when I was a child.” Neji snapped, looking like he dearly wanted to elbow her back. Ino made a kissing face and he recoiled, nearly knocking his neighbor off her seat. Ten Ten shoved back and they both went sprawling into the leaves, with Ino shrieking all the way.

“I watched Ninja Turtles instead of Care Bears.” Ten Ten winked, “Gotta love those nunchucks.”

Gaara stared at them all for far, far too long before intoning, “Prison.”

“All men are dirty rotten scumsucking pigs,” Tayuya glared, “Fucking assholes. I’d rather fuck a goat.”

Sasuke smirked, “Only a goat would have you.”

“Suck my dick, faggot.” Tayuya looked like she was going to leap, teeth bared, but Gaara reached out and casually yanked her back by the hair.

Kurenai clapped her hands together and cleared her throat pointedly and the group calmed down enough for Lee to announce, “I engage in the MANLY art of BALLET!”

The visual was staggering, and even though they must have known it was coming the group blanched. Gai was bad enough but the idea of Lee in a leotard and point shoes was significantly more disturbing.

“Lee…” Kurenai’s voice trailed off. Lee sagged and his eyes drifted towards the fire, much less enthused with the edited, “I used to engage in the womanly art of ballet.”

Naruto’s disgust slid effortlessly into pity at the expression on Lee’s face. Lee could be tiring with his enthusiasm but he looked unnatural without his wide smile and energetic attitude; he looked normal, but in a bad way.

But Naruto’s mind rebelled. Normal was good, never bad. Never ever.

Only normal would help let him see his family again.

“I…” Hinata’s voice nearly got lost in the crackle of the fire, “I…,” Her eyes were downcast as she poked her fingers together in a steady rhythm. Across the campfire Ino leaned forward and the look on her face…it was yearning, for what Naruto didn’t know. Could it be-

“I never want to be touched like that!” Hinata finally spit out, slivers of light falling from her bowed head only to dry up on the ground, “Never again!”

Ino bowed her head, her knuckles going white as she squeezed her knees, and because he was already reeling from the power of such a confession, the emotions it demanded, for a moment his heart was free to beat, to tell him…it was love. It was a fierce love that made him feel very young and his own worries insignificant under the weight of suddenly knowing that it was possible to look at someone of the same sex and yearn, to want to adore and protect; to love even while surrounded by a world that insisted otherwise. The proof was in the shine of Ino’s eyes as she tore her eyes away from Hinata to stare at the fire.

Naruto dropped his head as Hinata cried, as Ino despaired, and realized that there was a difference of what should be normal and cruelty of reality.

It was too much. Naruto was already walking away when Kurenai dismissed them all to bed. He listened to the hum of conversation, the banter of cursing, and knew without a doubt that were he to turn around Ino and Hinata would absent, hidden somewhere in a helpless embrace.

He took a left to head towards the garage, but before he could step off the porch he found himself turned violently and pinned to the wall by a weight that was becoming familiar. All Sasuke had to do was look at him and Naruto was helpless to move. Sasuke braced his arm over his head, and with those eyes coming so close that were Sasuke to blink Naruto would surely feel the brush against his cheek.

The night was warm but Sasuke’s breath, the way he settled a hand on Naruto’s hip made him shiver, and as Sasuke’s hand lowered, as his fingers splayed at the small of Naruto’s back Naruto couldn’t forget that look of longing in Ino’s eyes.

Sasuke laughed in a catch of breath and stood up, his body betraying no tremble as smirked and began to throw a silver object up in the air again and again.

The Zippo. Naruto crossed his arms and turned his face away to the sound of metal against flesh.

“Don’t take my shit, moron, or I’ll give back shit doubled.”

Betrayal, twice in a single night, and Sasuke embraced it with laughter. Naruto didn’t let the emotions show on his face. That act was becoming normal as well.

“Whatever. Get lung cancer.” Naruto started stepping down the stairs again, but his purpose made him heavy, made him slow enough that Sasuke grabbed him by the shoulder and yanked him back, the smirk twisted into a rage.

But Naruto knew, just from looking at Sasuke’s fisted hands, that the reason for his anger was confused by something else.

“Don’t walk away while I’m talking to you.” Sasuke hissed, reaching to grab Naruto by the front of his shirt. To push or pull? Sasuke’s frustration grew as looked at that hand, until he was shaking, and his lips twisted, and when he finally decided, when he started pulling Naruto in, Naruto did the best thing he could for the both of them and socked Sasuke right in the face.

Naruto looked at Sasuke down on the ground with a hand on his cheek, and said, “I’ll walk away if I want.”

And then, turning away, he did just that.

***UP NEXT- Step Three- De-mystifying the Opposite Sex