Who Am I Really(COMPLETE 5/4/10)

Chapter one: I'm not Crazy!


He woke to the sound of a steady high pitched beeping, the feel of starchy cotton on his skin, and an odd smell of stale antiseptic mixed with lemon. His eye lids felt heavy and sore against his eyes, his heart beating a heavy drum rhythm in the temple of his head. Placing a hand to his pounding head he slowly opened his eyes to squint and see that everything was white. He didn‘t remember the recovery area being so blaringly white, this quiet, or even this smell but he figured he couldn‘t be any where else. Opening his eyes a bit more he noticed that things were more blurry than he figured they should be, and there was a foggy image looming over him.

"Sakura-chan?" He croaked in question the sound making his head hurt more. The hell had happened during that last fight?

"No, Samuel it's me Ann, you’ve had another psychotic break." She replied placing a hand on his shoulder to push him back into the stiff mattress and dusty smelling pillow.

Everything in his mind came to a halt, the headache that had been there pestering him causing him pain was quickly pushed to the back of his mind. What the hell had she just said? Who the fuck was Sammuel anyway?

"Hey lady you have the wrong guy,” he answered shoving her hand off of him and trying to sit back up again. Gawd, his body ached, like he’d been laying here for awhile. “I'm Naruto Uzumaki."

The woman sighed in annoyance and stood up straight leaving his line of sight. He knew she shouldn’t be that blurry, he should be able to see her just fine but even squinting couldn’t bring her back into focus. The hell was up with his eyes?

"Sir it’s what we feared, he’s regressed.” She called out to someone and Naruto could hear foot steps come closer to his bed.

A low male voice chimed in with a displeased tone. "And we had made so much progress to."

Naruto listened intently to the scratching of pen on paper as the ass hole wrote whatever it was he was writing down. Naruto growled annoyed with the whole thing.

“Where am I? I will be released back to my friends or there will be hell.” He said matter-of-fact.

The man made a disappointed click of his tongue and sighed sounding more frustrated than Naruto felt. "Mr. Tanner I'm so very disappointed in you. You were making the most progress out of all my patients too."

"Look buddy, the name’s Naruto not Tanner, or Samuel, or whatever. Where the hell is Sakura? Or even that Bastard Sasuke?"

The doctor 'hmm' in disapproval. "Sammuel, those people you just named, they were all in your head."

The man leaned forward and placed a set of glasses on his nose, suddenly he was able to see everything rather well. The doctor was a short man five feet and five inches at best. Dark hair cut short to his head and grey eyes. White coat, blue tie, dark blue pants. The nurse was an older woman late forties, light brown hair up in a bun pink slacks and shirt with flowers. The man lifted a mirror to his face and Naruto's eyes widened. Sandy brown hair and brown eyes? He was almost about to believe what the man was saying until his eyes landed on three scars on both cheeks.

"Stop fuckin’ with me, I see the Kyuubii whiskers right there on my cheeks." He replied with an ‘ah ha’ like attitude.

Another sigh then the doctor opened a file in his hands and handed it to Naruto, pictures of him cutting his face were plain to see. Naruto’s brows knit into a frown as he flipped through the pictures. Him breaking glass, him picking up a shard of it, him pressing the shard against his cheek, each picture showing up with one more bleeding mark on his cheeks. By the end his room had been destroyed sheets and mattress ripped apart chair and table in a shattered scatter mess across the floor. His frown deepened as it all started to make a cruel sense.

"You see Mr. Tanner? You did them yourself when you separated apart of you and gave him a name. Kyuubii is your alter ego."

Naruto tossed the file away from him as if trying to deny what he had seen. The folder slid to the bottom of the bed and the picture fell out to the floor sliding further away. His arms quickly wrapping around him and he looked to the white tiled floor the frown still in place. It couldn’t be real, but it was the proof was right there. No it couldn’t, so many people, so many lives, so much hard work….

"Sam, everything you thought you were is all a lie that you made up."

"My friends?" He asked in a shaky voice.

"If you mean the imaginary ones in you head? That's exactly what they are, imaginary. You’re a bachelor and owner of a multi billion dollar enterprise." The doctor explained.

His heart sank at those words. "So I am alone is what you’re saying."

The doctor nodded. "We've been working on your issue with you this for a month now, I thought we were out of the water, but it appears that this loneliness is a bigger issue than I first thought."

The doctor said while picking up the file and photos, jotting down something he felt important to add to it as he stood up.

"What was my name again?" He asked in a whisper still not looking up at the doctor at the foot of his bed.

"Sammuel Tanner," came his reply. "The whole ninja thing, you becoming Hokage, your friends, and the demon within you were all made up because you were no longer able to handle the solitude."

Sam nodded heart aching in his chest, he was starting to get vague memories of there discussions from before. Right, all made up, he'd put himself here. He'd hurt countless people to get to the top, to be rich and powerful, and then he'd snapped. He had been at work at the time, some woman had walked into his office and broken his things. Yelled at him that he would always be alone, that no one would ever love a cold heartless bastard like him. He still couldn’t remember her name, even now, even though she had been the start of his break.

"How, how long was I in this time?" He questioned as he could feel his heart break, he closed his eyes against the harsh white reality to stop from tearing up.

The doctor seemed relieved, Sam was accepting this faster than previous times. This was a positive thing for Sam, maybe he would finally be able to go home soon.

"Only a week this time. Any new characters?" The doctor asked in turn.

Sam tried to think back. "I remember I was fighting someone again, trying to keep them from hurting my friends, some sort of rogue nin. And the color red..."

He couldn't remember the significance of the color red though. Something in him told him it was important, but still nothing came to mind as to why this was.

"Maybe you had injured them and it was blood?" The doctor inquired.

Sam shook his head in the negative ash brown hair swishing with the motion. "No, it couldn't have been, I've remembered all the other pervious times when I had injured someone."

The doctor nodded for this was true. "Well with some therapy I'm sure we can sort that out."

"Doc?" He inquired meek.

"Hm?"

"Will I ever be okay?" he breathed out.

The doctor contemplated for a moment. "With time, and help, I can have you back out there living the life you made yourself."

Sam nodded, right the life he'd made. How depressing of a thought was that? The lonely ass life he’d made. Life was wonderful at the top when you’d squashed every one and everything to get there. He thought to himself angrily.

"You should get some rest, we will have a session tomorrow morning." The doctor replied placing a comforting hand upon Sam’s shoulder, a small smile gracing his face.

"Aa." He replied.

Sam laid back into the pillows and stared out into the night. City lights flickering as people lived there lives. One day he would get to too, but where did one go when there was no one to share that life with?


~TBC~


Author Note: Okay Chapter one is finally done. I had this whole story written out months ago. But it was far to short and skipped over a lot of things. I had a friend read it and asked her opinion of what she felt it needed. Thanks to her I’m well on my way. I hope she likes this revision of it and I hope all of you enjoy it as well. I’m pretty sure this is as original as it can get currently, but I could be wrong someone might have already tapped this idea. *shrugs* I haven’t a clue, so if some how this seems familiar to anyone it is completely by accident I assure you.

Thank you MangaMistress!!! Aka writer of “How Orphan Boys Play” here on aff.net. Go check it out I found it to be a fun read, but be aware that it is WIP. Tee hee Sai is so much fun in that story. Anyway I’m off to re-write my next chapter!