Teach Me

OMG! I'm updating??? :D Yes indeedy. I've been busy with moving into my first house (well and finding it first) and with an HP exchange, but I'll keep pecking away at this one. I promise you, my lovelies. :)

A New Understanding

Sakura tapped lightly on Tsunade's office door. She'd been summoned a half an hour ago and despite being rather disillusioned when it came to her master, she couldn't ignore the call. After her two meetings with Shino and the roller coaster that her life was becoming, it was hard to look at her mentor with the same blind admiration that she had just a scant few months ago. However, Tsunade was still her master and her Hokage, and she had to obey a summons no matter what inner turmoil she was dealing with at the time.

“Enter!” came the muffled answer a moment later. That had been rather quick, so Tsunade probably hadn't been sleeping and probably wasn't drunk. That pretty much guaranteed that there would be a mission waiting for her. She didn't think she'd be sent out so soon...but in a way it would be nice to get away from her current life and submerse herself in whatever role was given to her.

She pushed the door open and peaked in. “You called for me, shishou?”

“Sakura,” Tsunade said, glancing up and then nodding. “Come in and close the door.”

“Yes shishou,” she said softly, closing the door and positioning herself in front of Tsunade's desk. “Did you have some work for me today?”

“No, nothing for the hospital or me; I wanted to talk to you for a bit and then I have a mission assignment for you,” Tsunade replied, dropping her pen and leaning back in her chair. “Sit.”

Sakura slid sideways into the chair next to her leg and sat, waiting patiently for whatever it was that Tsunade wanted to talk about. She was fairly sure it would have to do with the progress of her training and all that had happened since she'd joined ANBU.

“How are you doing?” Tsunade started, tenting her fingers under her chin thoughtfully.

Sakura blinked at her incredulously as her mind stuttered briefly to a halt. “Seriously?”

“Yes,” her master said with a blank face.

“How am I doing?” Sakura repeated slowly, utterly astonished at the gall of the woman before her. “I'm tired, hungry, completely disillusioned, and more than a little pissed about everything that has happened to me in the last few months, otherwise just dandy. You?” she asked sarcastically.

“Lovely, thanks for asking,” Tsunade answered with a snort. “I want to know how you're doing in your training, what you've been doing, if you're going to make it.”

Well at least that made a little more sense. “I've been sparring with Naruto and Sasuke nearly every day. They're making sure that I get faster and stronger. I've been doing the other training with Kakashi and Kiba so I should be ready for missions that call for that sort of thing. I even trained with Shino a bit a few days ago,” she finished quietly, wondering how the older woman would react to that.

The response wasn't quite what Sakura expected. “Shino?” Tsunade asked one brow going up, the only change in her expression. “That's a bit surprising. I didn't think you two interacted much.”

“You are mistaken. We used to be friends, sort of any way. We're not now, but he is helping me to learn how to get out of...unpleasant situations,” Sakura said looking her master in the eye seriously. “I haven't had a chance to thank you for destroying that for me too. I really liked Shino.”

“Ah, so you figured it out,” Tsunade muttered, scowling. “It was supposed to remain secret.”

“Yeah well you had a leak anyway,” Sakura scoffed. “Shino told me about you stopping Naruto from tearing him apart the next day. Naruto and Sasuke both knew about it and who did it before I did. Something went terribly wrong in ANBU's lines of communication and someone leaked information.”

“Is that how you found out?” Tsunade asked leaning forward. “If there is a leak I need to know the source so they can be...subdued properly.”

“No, I recognized Shino's smell at a dance club a few night ago...it's kind of earthy. We talked a few things out the next day and night, so I know it was him,” Sakura said with a small shrug.

“And he's alive?” Tsunade asked, clearly surprised at that possibility.

“Yes,” Sakura said with a nod. “I'm sure it will take some time and probably a few sound punches, but I might forgive him eventually...I think. You...I haven't decided yet,” she said honestly.

Tsunade winced slightly and nodded. “I can understand that. I'm honestly surprised that you haven't asked to be released from training with me. I have betrayed you just as much as Shino, haven't I? Perhaps more,” she mused softly. Almost as an afterthought she sighed, “It was for your own good though.”

“That's a bunch of bullshit,” Sakura growled, fury flashing through her the instant the words fell from her mentor's lips; the woman she once trusted with everything. “You don't need to send your elite teams out to molest their own to teach a lesson...shishou,” she bit out. “You're only breaking down the lines of trust and communication in the ranks.”

Sakura stood and leaned forward intently. “There is a disease in the ranks of ANBU, men and women who take joy in hurting their fellows and leaders who enable them. Shino took the mission so worse men couldn't, men like Ibiki. Shino is a gentle, sweet man that I am no longer able to look at without feeling a twinge of fear and anger, let alone feel that I can fully trust him. Are you proud of us now? We're a team of psycho's and mentally unstable victims. Congrats...shishou.”

“You're out of order Sakura and treading a dangerous line with me,” Tsunade warned, standing and staring back at the pink haired woman. “I think you've begun to forget your place, working so close by my side day in and day out.”

“Perhaps, but I'm also right,” Sakura returned stubbornly. “You could, just as easily, simulate attacks in a controlled environment. Hell, you could have done it all with a genjitsu and it would have felt real...but wouldn't have been in the end. You wouldn't have to kill parts of people to teach them something!”

“It's our way,” Tsunade sighed.

“Well it's wrong!” Sakura insisted.

“Perhaps,” Tsunade conceded, “But it is still the current way of things. Maybe a change would be acceptable. Not that it helps those of you who came before a change to our current system. ANBU is what it is for a reason. Do you think stable people could do what Ibiki does? Instability is sometimes necessary...as long as something is waiting to rein it in when it has served its purpose.”

She sighed, reaching for a scroll and handing it to Sakura. “Use your training well on this mission. Neji is the leader. You will act as his wife. Shino and Kiba will go as backup and trackers. Anko will also travel with you, as Neji's sister and your close friend. She will advise you in the ways of an ANBU kunoichi and what the job entails. You aren't a highly trained whore, I assure you. She'll show you that. Very rarely will you need to seduce anyone, but it is a valuable tool that you needed to develop. I'm sure with your relationship with Kakashi and Kiba, you will be sufficiently prepared. Anko can fill you in as you go, if necessary, for this mission.”

Sakura stared at her for a long moment, frustrated that she was being dismissed so out of hand. Another veil fell away and she crushed the scroll in her fist. “So that's how it is,” she said softly. She really was just a weapon to the older woman, one well loved, but still just a weapon. “Very well. As of now I will be what you ask of me, your sword, but only at a cost. I can't be your apprentice any longer...or your friend, Hokage-sama. I can't be both weapon and friend and do either effectively. I see that now, and I thank you for your past indulgence.” She bowed her head curtly and spun on her heel to leave, missing the hurt and disappointment that slid over her master's face as she slammed the door.

***

Sakura sat at the long table of their scheduled meeting room, idly twirling a kunai on her finger as she stared blankly up at the school room style chalk board. The room was still empty, so she had some time to gather her thoughts, which she was thankful for. Tsunade had said it to her before, that she was a weapon, but it hadn't seemed real until the blond had started talking about why ANBU were the way they were and then just jumping right into giving her a mission. No wonder Kakashi got out of ANBU so soon. Would he be as crazy as the rest of them by now; as cold? Sasuke was already half-way there, but he'd always been that way, so it wasn't ANBU's fault. Naruto was already uniquely odd, so hopefully he was immune from the cold, 'do what has to be done' way of thinking that prevailed in the elite group. He was more of a 'do what he felt he should do' kind of guy, and she hoped he stayed that way.

A scuff of a shoe caught her attention, jerking her head around. She flushed as Shino raised one hand in greeting. If she was so jumpy in ANBU headquarters, what would she do once she was out with the crazies of the world...or at least the ones that she didn't know. “She's rather cruel, isn't she?” she sighed.

He didn't need to ask as he sat down a few chairs away. “Yes,” he sighed. Tsunade had of course known he'd taken the 'mission' and had still paired them up. “Perhaps it's her way of making us learn to work together again...to make you trust me again.”

“Or she's just doing it because she feels like it,” Sakura said, dropping her kunai and rubbing her face wearily.

“Are you okay?” he asked softly.

“I'm just tired,” she muttered into her hands. “I fought with Tsunade a while ago. I told her I didn't want to be her apprentice anymore. She only seems to see me as a weapon as of late, so that is what I'll become for her.”

Shino was silent for a moment and then moved down the row until he was seated next to her. “She loves you Sakura, more than anyone else...well except for Uzumaki maybe.” He reached out and grasped one hand, pulling it away from her eyes. “You're not just a weapon to her. You're like a daughter or a younger sister to her. You know this.”

“Not anymore,” Sakura said standing and shaking his hand off. “Maybe when I was still young and naive and needed guidance, but not now. I've gotten too strong, stronger than her in some ways. After all, it's not like she was training me to be a friend or a daughter. She was always, in the back of both our minds, making me into the strongest shinobi that I could be. I was weak as a child and would have probably been dead by now if not for her training.”

“Sakura...” he started softly.

“It's true Shino,” she muttered, clenching her fists as tears welled up in her eyes. She felt him at her back and very slowly, hesitantly, his arms came around her waist, pulling her against his solid chest. “I hate this,” she sobbed out. “I'm so sick of it all. I'm afraid in a way that I haven't been in years and I'm so deeply tired. I hate that even now, you touching me makes me feel both warm and scared.” She turned in his arms and thumped a fist against his chest. “It wasn't supposed to be like this. It was supposed to be challenging missions and making friends with people that could actually challenge me on all levels. It wasn't supposed to be about fear and hatred and betrayal.”

“I know,” he said simply. “I understand.”

He pulled her close and tucked her head under his chin, relaxing as some of the tension flowed out of the woman in his arms. “I'm sorry for my part in it. I'm sorry that you can't be just you anymore. I'm sorry you had to change.”

He raised one arm and stroked her hair gently, “I always loved sweet, innocent Sakura,” he admitted. “I loved that way she'd beam at everyone so gently or nag them for stepping out of line. I loved the way she'd bring flowers to her sick or injured friends in the hospital and chat with them endlessly until they were able to relax and sleep.” He pulled back and pushed her hair back from her face. He reached up and tugged his glasses off to show her the sincerity of his words. “But I also love the Sakura that can bring down a mountain with her fist, and the Sakura who doesn't cry and faint when an enemy captures her. I love the Sakura who slices off her hair just to escape...to protect her friends. You aren't just a weapon Sakura. All of that is part of you still; it's just altered a bit to fit your changing life and situation.”

She sniffed and blinked at him, a small smile touching her lips. That was actually a rather sweet thing for him to say. Though, she had to admit, she hadn't really visited anyone lately, being so busy with training. She still nagged Naruto though, so maybe she'd be alright.... “Thank you Shino,” she said softly, drawing away slowly. “That was kind of you to say.”

He nodded and stepped back, sliding his glasses back into place, but not hiding the brief flash of disappointment in them soon enough. She cocked her head slightly and frowned. “Are you okay?”

Shino jerked his head in a nod and smiled slightly. “Yes, I'm as I should be.”

She frowned deeper at his cryptic response, quickly going over their conversation, stopping cold at the consistent use of 'love' from him. Did he love her, really love her? She opened her mouth to ask...well she wasn't sure what, but was interrupted by Kiba bounding into the room, followed by Anko and then Neji.

“Hey babe!” Kiba said, smiling broadly until he saw the tear tracks on her face and then Shino. His eyes narrowed at the young man and he growled softly. If he'd had hackles, they would have been standing up on end, she was sure. Neji looked on sedately as Shino straightened up and Kiba began to advance slowly. Anko simply flicked alert eyes over the scene and then leaned back against the wall to watch it play out.

“What did you do?” Kiba growled stalking his long-time friend slowly. Shino actually stepped back slightly in surprise.

“Kiba,” Sakura chided softly, wiping her tears away. “He didn't do anything. I was already upset when I got here.” She was surprised at the aggressive stance of the dog man, but then, despite being his friend, Shino had damaged her. She had a feeling Kiba was starting to regard Sakura as his territory, at least a little. “He was just trying to cheer me up.”

Kiba turned, studying her honest face, then relaxed and nodded reluctantly.

“Pissing contest over then?” Anko grunted from the back of the room. “Yes? Good, let's get this meeting going. I have things to get done before we head out.”

“I agree,” Neji said softly, heading to the front of the room. “We're leaving early in the morning, so let's get this sorted out so we're ready to go on time.”

Shino, Kiba, and Sakura nodded, taking seats, Kiba insinuating himself between Shino and Sakura with a soft grunt of annoyance. Shino accepted the arrangement without comment, though his shoulders where stiff with tension. Sakrua sighed softly to herself and shook her head, before turning her attention to Neji. Anko plunked down on the tabletop a few feet away and waved for Neji to get going.

Neji nodded and frowned thoughtfully. “Our mission is fairly straightforward as far as we can tell. We are going after a slave trader that resides about a week's travel to the south. He primarily deals in female slaves and young men, primarily for sex companions and decoration. The only reason he even made a blip on our radar though, is that he's recently taken on a nobleman's eldest daughter as his personal slave. He contests that she was won fairly in a tournament, but the nobleman insists that she was kidnapped and being held against his wishes.”

“So we're rescuing the girl?” Sakura asked. “Why do we need five ANBU for something like this? Genin could do a rescue mission.”

“Because we're actually taking down the whole operation,” Anko said swinging her legs lazily as she stared at the ceiling. “We're being paid to assassinate the slave trader and his advisors.”

Sakura blanched slightly. She'd been on a few assassination missions and they never sat very well with her, even when it was nasty men like slave traders and cruel warlords. “Who's going to do it?”

“You and Anko,” Neji said. “You will be my wife and Anko my sister, thus in my power to offer up to our host. Once he accepts your company you will question him and kill him. Shino, Kiba, and I will take care of his advisors and any who resist in the process.”

She swallowed, glancing and Anko, and then nodding. The older woman smirked at her, “Good girl. You can do it,” she said with a nod. “I'll be there to help if you slip up. She might be a royal bitch, but she wouldn't send you out without support your first few times,” she said mouth quirked up at the side. Though Anko didn't say who 'she' was, it was obvious whom she meant.

“What did she do to you?” Sakura blurted out.

“Nothing,” Anko said with a shrug. “We just don't get along. We too much alike I guess.”

Neji cleared his throat pointedly, drawing their attention back to the front. He pointed to the corner of the room, where boxes were piled. “Those are some of the supplies you will all need. Weapons are left up to your discretion. Shino and Kiba's may be visible, as they are our bodyguards, though Kiba you'll need to disguise your tattoos or alter them.” Kiba frowned and grunted, but nodded his understanding. The Inuzuka tattoos did stand out a bit and if the enemy was only a week away, they'd likely recognize them.

“Anko and Sakura keep your weapons discrete and carefully hidden. Anko, show Sakura which she would be best able to use in the situations you'll be in.” The older woman nodded and shrugged, and Sakura swallowed. Anko made her nervous and it looked like she'd be up close and personal with her for a while during this mission. Though, she couldn't think of many more women she'd trust to prepare her properly. Kurenai was nice, but not in ANBU and probably too big hearted to be of use in this situation. There was something innately sexual about Anko that made her a more appropriate teacher in this case. After all they were going after someone that more or less ran a sex trade and would probably have to use sex a bit at least to get to him.

“Gather the supplies marked with your name and memorize your mission scrolls,” Neji continued. “Anko, go to Sakura's apartment tonight when you've finished with your own arrangements and help her prepare. Kiba and Shino come with me and I'll instruct you both in your rolls as my bodyguards. That's all. Meet at 5 tomorrow.”

The group broke up, Kiba stalking after Neji and Shino, glancing back at her briefly as they left the room, but saying nothing. Anko remained seated for a long moment and then sighed and stood. “So you're the new kid on the block eh?” She dusted imaginary dust off her clothing and turned to look at Sakura appraisingly.

Sakura stood and took the inspection without a word, but nodded her reply.

“You're too cute. They'll never take you seriously,” the older woman announced with a disgusted wave of her hand. She didn't say if 'they' meant her colleagues or their enemies. Anymore, it was almost the same thing anyway, so maybe clarification wasn't necessary. “So...Princess,” Anko sneered softly, “What makes you ready for ANBU?”

Sakura frowned, eyes narrowing. “Because I am,” she growled. “Can you turn a wall into dust with your fist? Can you make a man feel like he's turned inside out with genjustu? Can you put him back together again when he really is? What makes you ready for ANBU...senpai?”

Anko gazed at her, expressionless for a moment and then grinned. “I like you kid. You've got a little fire in you, don't you?”

Sakura blinked, taken aback by the switch in attitude in the woman. “What...?”

“Don't be so uptight girlie,” Anko said patting Sakura on the shoulder. “You're good, I know that. You wouldn't be here if you weren't and you wouldn't have Tsunade's personal attention if you didn't have potential.” She stretched and grinned, “Now let's go get something to eat.”

Sakura stared dumbly for a moment and then nodded, hurrying to pick up her box of supplies, and then Anko's when the other woman made no move to do so, and followed her from the room. She was like a bizarre mix of Naruto's mischievousness and Kakashi's laziness, and just a little of Tsunade's nonchalance. Sakura was fairly certain that the older woman was going to drive her absolutely batty over the next several weeks.

***

“Nice place you've got here,” Anko announced, looking around as Sakura dropped both of their boxes on the table with a huff. She'd had to carry them both to the small tempura place on the corner, all the way to Anko's apartment to gather her gear, and then all the way back to Sakura's apartment. Apparently Anko planned on staying the night.

“Thanks,” she muttered wandering into the kitchen. “The bedroom is just down the hall. You can leave your stuff in there if you want. Want anything to drink?”

“Shouchuu* if you have it, beer if you don't,” Anko called to her as she carried her pack to Sakura's room.

“Beer it is,” Sakura sighed, opening her fridge and pulling out two Kirin and then gathering up two glasses for them. “So tell me again why we're having this little sleepover?” she called, wandering into the living room area and plopping on the couch.

Anko wandered back into the room, dressed only in her mesh top and shorts, making Sakura blink in surprise. The mesh top really left nothing to the imagination. “Because you'll probably need a little help getting into all of the crap Neji wants you to wear and I'll already be here to do it.”

“Can't I just pack it all up and put it on once we get closer?” Sakura asked, trying valiantly not to stare at the tiny rose nipples that were seemingly dancing right in front of her face. It wasn't like she'd never seen another naked woman. She and Ino went to the public bath almost once a week together, but Anko was so blatant about it. Without her vest on they were just...there!

Anko smirked knowingly at the direction of the younger woman's gaze, but ignored the opportunity in favor of answering her. There would be time to play with the girl later after all. “No, we're assuming our rolls from the start, so when we arrive we'll be fully prepared, and if we're spied on, we won't look suspicious.”

“Oh,” Sakura said, tearing her eyes away from Anko and concentrating on filling their glasses. Pushing one to the dark hair woman, she kept her gaze resolutely on her face. “So what's first tonight?”

“We need to figure out our relationship as fully as possible, so we can fill the men in on it tomorrow and then we need to make sure you know which weapons to take and how to hide them,” Anko said relaxing back in the chair across from Sakura. She sipped at her beer with a pleased sigh. “So, how do I know you?”

“You're my husband's sister, but perhaps we went to an academy together?” Sakura suggested.

“Do I really look young enough to be a peer?” Anko snorted. “They won't believe that.”

Sakura cocked her head to the side and mused, “Maybe not my age, but certainly young enough that you were at the same school as I. Perhaps three or four years my senior?”

Anko blinked and then laughed. “You're such a doll. I'm going to keep you around just to feed my ego. Perhaps we were simply neighbors and being somewhat close in age, were friendly with each other,” she said with a small smile.

“Alright,” Sakura said with a nod. “And then, when I married Neji several months ago, we became very good friends, as we were then living under the same roof.” She sipped her own beer and frowned, “But as a woman who’s older than me, why wouldn't you be married?”

“He was killed during a raid on our home, along with my parents. We'll say Neji and I were away at the time, visiting relatives in the north or something. His name was...Kenji. I've always liked that name you know,” she said with a strangely sad smile.

Sakura looked at her silently for a moment and then asked, “Anko, why aren't you married? Is it ANBU?”

Anko sighed and leaned forward, setting her glass down. “Partly I suppose, though men don't get close to me easily, from my end or theirs. They are a little intimidated by me and my past and I can't say I trust them all that much...not after him.

“Orochimaru?” Sakura asked gently. Anko had been one of the few to survive his curse, and Sakura wasn't entirely sure if the woman was lucky in that respect. Anko jerked her head in a nod. “He's dead. He can't control you now.”

“I know that,” Anko snapped, though little heat was present.

“So is there a 'Kenji'?” Sakura asked, grinning slightly.

“Maybe,” Anko muttered.

“Do I know him?” Sakura asked.

Anko looked up at her and grinned a little back, “Afraid so.”

Sakura laughed, “When you say it like that it's got to be Kakashi or Gemna or some other pain in the ass guy.”

“Not Kakashi, but you're not far off,” Anko said picking up her beer again. “Although I wouldn't mind taking another crack at him too. He's a real piece of work that one.”

“You've slept with Kakashi?” Sakura gasped, not sure if she should be a little jealous or dig for details.

“Sure,” Anko said waving her hand. “The town isn't that big after all, and we've been on loads of missions together, so it happens now and then.” She chuckled softly and shook her head. “We're getting off track. We should be figuring out our characters.”

Sakura sighed, pouting just enough to make the other woman laugh outright. “I guess,” she said reluctantly. “But later?”

“Sure,” Anko said with a shrug and a small smile. “Later.”

***

*Note: Shouchuu is a lovely drink I learned about in Japan. In the past it was primarily a poor man's drink, from what I've heard, though there are supposedly some high quality varieties now. Anywho, we lived on Kyushu for just shy of two years and when asked what you drank you should say 'shouchuu' and when asked what kind you'd better say imo (sweet potato). It's the variety that seems to be preferred in that area. Kirishima Gold was the one most seemed to drink in my area (Miyazaki/Miyakonojo/Kagoshima). Check out wiki, it's on the left (green) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sh%C5%8Dch%C5%AB. There was a Kirishima Gold facility in Miyakonojo and Kirishima wasn't far, so that's probably why. Local pride and all. It's a little like vodka, but not. I can't really explain it. It is drank straight, or mixed with water (hot or cold depending on the weather). There was this one bar we went to on occasion that had a whole bunch of 2 liter bottles already mixed (½ water, ½ shouchuu). My favorite bar was Booze though. It was a nomihodai (all you can drink for 2500-3000 yen). The bartenders were awesome and the atmosphere really relaxed. If you're ever in Miyakonojo, go to Booze. It's awesome! (Or e-mail me and tell me about you're time in Miyakonojo-little 'home' sick for it).