Tsunade's Secret Lesson

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto of course.

Rating: M – Very adult. TsunadexKakashi and some very adult situations.

A/N to all who reviewed:
roxnroll - Thank you. I'm a romantic.
countdown - Hmm... wait and see.
PotionsPet - Yes, I like cliffhangers.
Mrs. Cake - Thanks! Here you go.

Summary: Tsunade wants some special attention. She cons Kakashi into supplying it.

Notes: This chapter contains some slight yuri. Sorry if you are offended. Merry Xmas!

Tsunade's Secret Lesson by Yojami

Chapter 14– Mission Impossible

Jiraiya felt helpless being stuck in the village, but he had no choice. The Hokage had made up her mind to leave and he stayed behind-in case, the unspeakable happened and she lost and failed in her mission. While there was a chance that could happen, he had faith in her ability. If he truly didn't think that she could handle Orochimaru, he would have backed her up. She had beaten him last time even after overcoming her fear of blood and her injuries.

Meanwhile, he was stuck in the village, babysitting. He shook his head. None of the villagers knew exactly what she was up to. Not even Shizune. Not even Kakashi. Only Jiraiya knew, but that was because he had a penchant for eavesdropping.

It's not like she had a choice. Orochimaru had sealed Kakashi's Sharingan. The Mountain Sage had seen this before, back in the last great ninja war. It was a nasty curse jutsu that disabled any techniques related to a bloodline. It was deemed so devastating that it was categorized as a forbidden jutsu. Though technically Kakashi's Sharingan was implanted, it affected him the same nonetheless. The cure was lost in this new generation. Tsunade had to stop Orochimaru or prolong him enough to develop a cure.

Jiraiya moved on to lighter musings now. He wondered if the kunoichi had started their mission. From what he remembered, their mission was a very exciting and possibly stimulating adventure. He smirked at what he remembered from their briefing. He admired how Tsunade was able to keep her composure when she described the details to them. "You all have to play important roles in subduing Kakashi. You might think that this is overkill, having two jounins and a tokubetsu jounin, but I have to warn you, this is not your normal mission. You are not to harm Kakashi or render him unconscious. Your mission is to distract him, keep him occupied and prevent him from entering deep into the forest. It's no coincidence that I chose you three. You are all very attractive women with different strengths; use that to your advantage." Tsunade had said that with a straight face. Originally, Kurenai believed the Hokage was joking. To Kurenai's dismay, Tsunade was serious. Jiraiya almost laughed out loud.

Oh boy, what he wouldn't give to watch that mission. It would give him major research material for his next novel. He started to walk towards an area where he could watch the women in secrecy.

--------------------------------

"Kurenai, it's time, get ready." Shizune yelled. She had already gotten prepared and was gathering the team.

Kurenai hated this mission. If it was anyone but a Konoha ninja, it would be okay. Yet this time, it was Asuma's friend. It made it harder when it was someone you knew. In the past, she had executed these missions to perfection without protest, but this was extremely difficult-no doubt, probably the most difficult seducing mission yet. Kakashi knew all three of them and he would probably wonder why they were acting out of character. They had to sell this performance very well. She took once last glance at her reflection on the mirror. She looked gorgeous, and she knew it. She was ready.

She joined Shizune outside and they both walked towards Anko's house. From the corner of Kurenai's eye, she admired Shizune's getup. The medic had replaced her standard issue kimono for a more revealing one. Kurenai couldn't help but smirk when she recognized the sweet scent of perfume emanating from Shizune's slightly concealed breasts. It was always fun to see the conservative Shizune dressed that way. Shizune gave off that sexy, naughty librarian vibe. Shaking her head, Kurenai glanced at Shizune in disbelief, "I can't believe we're doing this. It's just so wrong, so very wrong. Why are we doing this, anyway? I can understand if we need to subdue someone to steal secret plans or something, but what are we preventing Kakashi from doing? He's part of our village. He's not a traitor. What's the angle here? Is Tsunade just toying with us?"

Shizune recalled Tsunade-sama's words earlier, "I've put Kakashi through some training but I need to ultimately test its effectiveness. Anko and Kurenai will distract Kakashi and see if he can take his training to another level... Shizune, in addition to providing backup, you can also provide medical support just to make sure that Kakashi doesn't get too overworked. Don't forget though, I just need you three to keep him occupied."

"Honestly, I don't know, Kurenai. She didn't give me the details, nor did I ask. She's the Hokage and we are supposed to do what we are told," Shizune stated simply. "Besides, I could think of worse guys to seduce. I mean, I do think Kakashi's attractive." She added blatantly. It had been a while since she had been on a mission since she was usually by Tsunade's side. She was actually looking forward to this.

The genjutsu expert stared at the medic-nin with mild amusement. "You have the hots for Kakashi!" she laughed. "No wonder you didn't argue against this mission like I did!"

"Well, I did see a picture of him naked with just the mask..." Her voice trailed off and her cheeks began to redden. "This seducing mission is not going to be easy, but it may be fun." She said winking mischievously. While Shizune was genuinely happy for Tsunade, there was a small part of her that was jealous. "Remember though, we are only to keep him from leaving his training grounds... that worries me. It makes me think Tsunade's got something else planned."

Shizune knocked on Anko's door as Kurenai yelled for Anko to get ready. They heard rustling from behind the door as their last teammate rushed to meet them outside. The three kunoichi looked at each other and nodded their approval. Anko was the sexy, wild one. Shizune was the pretty but conservative one. Kurenai was the beautiful one. Kakashi didn't stand a chance. Not one chance.

As they travelled to Kakashi's training area they recounted their plan. Shizune, as team leader explained, "I will be walking to Kakashi to give him some medicine on my way to a seducing mission and I will give him a healing massage. Kurenai and Anko, you will be training together but really having a girl talk discussion about a 'drunken incident' that will peak Kakashi's interest. Your training will actually start from far away but you will be nearing Kakashi's area when you are taking a break to gather up stray kunai. This way he won't suspect why I'm dressed this way and why we all happen to be in the same proximity."

The planned sounded solid. "Is the medicine for the Gedo Mark?" Kurenai wondered.

"No, we have yet to find a cure. This medicine is.... well… it's..." Shizune voice trailed off. She was a bit embarrassed.

"It's Spanish Fly isn't it?" Anko confirmed. She had always wondered if a potion that could make you sexually aroused really existed. She was excited to find out that Shizune could concoct it.

Shizune nodded. "Yes, but I added something which will also increase his sense of hearing so that he can overhear your 'drunken incident' conversation."

"When did you learn how to make that? And can I have some?" Anko teased.

Shizune rolled her eyes, "A long time ago actually. Remember, I'm a medic-nin and I was taught by Tsunade-sama. It was probably one of the first lessons she gave me in medicines and poisons. She's a perv in her own right. I mean, for her to have been teammates with Jiraiya-sama..."

Kurenai laughed. She just couldn't imagine having to deal with a pervy teammate like Jiraiya-sama. There’s no way anyone could remain naive and innocent in that man’s vicinity.

"So what's this 'drunken incident'? Something involving me and Asuma?" Anko asked confused.

Shizune shook her head. "No, not quite."

Kurenai gave a crooked smile because she was proud of her idea. "Well... it's something involving you, me, a drunken kiss, and our unresolved feelings for one another."

Anko's eyes widened and almost let out a snort. "I love it! That’s even better! Oh, man... Kakashi won't need those Icha Icha books after today!" Needless to say, she was totally on board with the whole idea.

-------------------------------------------------------------

The intelligence reports identified Orochimaru’s whereabouts to be surprisingly close to the boundaries of the Leaf Village in a deserted clearing. The forest surrounding the location was eerily quiet, as if the other living things instinctively knew to avoid the area. The crack of a wooden twig braking broke the peace.

Waiting underneath the branches, Orochimaru and Kabuto turned their heads in the direction of the sound. Purposeful footsteps announced the presence of someone approaching. This person made no attempt to hide, nor conceal her movements. The ninja marched towards them with a fierce look mixed with determination and anger. Without fear, the ninja stopped right in front of the Leaf Village traitors. Clad in black with the standard issue green vest was the protector of the village, the Godaime Hokage.

Orochimaru sneered as he eyed his ex-teammate dressed in the standard ninja battle uniform. He stared at her with his head held high and with an arrogant grin sneered, “You look more like the jounin Tsunade, rather than the Godaime today. Are you looking for a fight? Don’t you still want to negotiate?”

The corner of her mouth rose in a half smile as she snorted a little breath as a response to his question. Her eyes narrowed again in that dangerous look and said, “I told you ‘no’ before, and I’m not changing my mind. I am the Godaime Hokage and I will risk my life to protect the lives of all the villagers.”

Her strong words did not frighten Orochimaru. He looked to his partner Kabuto and they exchanged a look of understanding. After a moment the traitor san-nin spoke, “Well, it seems that I haven’t given you enough reasons to fix my arms. So, let me try again.”

He placed his hand out as Kabuto sliced into it to retrieve a portion of his blood. The bespectacled ninja performed a familiar ninjutsu and helped summon the King Snake for his master. The ground rumbled loudly as a large creature appeared supporting Orochimaru and Kabuto on his head.

-------------------------------------

Kakashi wiped his brow as moisture collected on his forehead. Kakashi was launching kunai and shuriken at various targets with the same dead aim each time. He was enjoying this training session. It forced him to concentrate on things that didn’t arouse him. In his sexually frustrated state, it was best to be alone. "I see you haven't lost your touch Kakashi," A seductive woman’s voice carried across the training grounds.

"Shizune?” Kakashi blinked. Damn, a woman. He was surprised to see her there. He was even more surprised to see what she was wearing. He took a deep breath to control his immediate reaction. “What brings you here?" He asked. He sat down, trying to keep his cool.

She handed him a flask. “I’m under orders to administer this medicine.” He looked at it questioningly but he swallowed it whole.

“So what’s with your whole getup?” Kakashi asked curiously. “You look very sexy by the way.” He wondered why he added that compliment. He was usually much more reserved. It must be because he hadn’t had any lately. He was being overly sensitive to his surroundings.

Shizune blushed. “Oh, I’m supposed to head out on a mission in a bit. I’m glad you approve of the outfit.” It looks like the potion is working already.

As he stared at Shizune, he started to feel a warm tingling sensation all over his body. The sounds of the forest started getting louder. He stared down at his arms and felt his neck. “I think something’s wrong. I’m feeling hot… and I’m hearing things.”

Pretending to be concerned, Shizune moved closer and leaned down a little to place her hand on his forehead. “Well, you feel a little warmer than usual.” She moved her hand to his neck in a gesture that was half diagnostic and half caress. She lowered her head further so she could whisper in his ear softly, “How well can you hear this?”

Kakashi gulped. From his angle, he could see down her kimono to her round breasts and her hand on his neck was making him extremely uncomfortable. He felt her breath on his ear and tried to respond calmly, “Your whisper was loud. I could also hear two women sparring, which is strange because I could usually sense their chakra first before I can hear people.”

Shizune faked more concern, furrowing her brow. “Really? You can hear sparring? I can’t. How do you know they are women? Can you hear their voices?” She could tell that Kakashi was close to being fully aroused. She hid the smile on her face as she noticed the familiar outline on his pants.

He tried to concentrate on his hearing but he felt very nervous with Shizune that close. He closed his eyes and heard a very interesting conversation. “It’s Anko and Kurenai. Anko just ripped a part of Kurenai’s dress and Kurenai retaliated by launching a couple of kunai at Anko. Anko dodged them both but her shirt got cut in the process…and…there… you hear that? I just heard the two kunai hitting a tree about 50 yards away.”

“Wow, that’s some hearing you got there…” She trailed off and bit her lip nervously to bait him into thinking something was wrong.

“It sounds like you weren’t expecting me to hear so well.” He guessed.

“Yes, the medicine I gave you has many side affects but super hearing isn’t one of them.” She lied. “Do you still hear them?”

He tilted his head in the direction of the kunoichi and said, “Yes. They are walking towards the kunai and talking. Anko just said that she’s pissed off at Kurenai for what happened. Kurenai is apologizing. Anko says that it’s not nice to play with her emotions that way. Kurenai said that she didn’t mean to…” He paused and his eyes widened with intense interest and desire.

“What is it?” Shizune asked. “Are you okay?”

“Yes…umm…Kurenai made out with Anko!” His voice and his ragged breathing betrayed his attempts at composure as he realized what he had just heard. He had half a mind to thank the gods for this wonderful blessing. His mind was racing with all the possible combinations of Anko and Kurenai kissing and groping each other. It was like one of his most perverted dreams come true!

Shizune was laughing inside at Kakashi’s reaction. There was no doubt that the coupling of Anko and Kurenai would be what he was imagining right about now. She knew that the men of Konoha and some women too had long been fantasizing about that. She figured she better go for the kill now. “Okay, that just doesn’t sound right, Kakashi. They wouldn’t be saying those things. I’m really worried that you are hearing things. I’m going to have to give you a more thorough examination now. Please remove your shirt.” She stated matter-of-factly.

For the second time that day, Kakashi blinked at her stupidly. In his lustful state, he wondered if Shizune ever read the Icha Icha books. She was acting like one of those raunchy nurses from the books. He quickly snapped out of it when he heard the ground shake. First, he heard Anko and Kurenai getting it on. Second, he saw Shizune coming on to him and now he felt an earthquake. He began to worry if he was losing it.

-------------------------------------

Tsunade made no move to summon her slug, which surprised Orochimaru and Kabuto. She watched as the large snake lowered his head menacingly towards her. The serpent hissed, “Are you going to fight me by yourself? Orochimaru summoned me just for you? What a waste!” The serpent was too prideful to fight just a lowly woman.

Arrogantly she placed her hands on her hips and retorted to the snake, “You do remember that it was I who placed that blow hole through your head, right?”

The King Snake wheezed angrily but backed up a little bit as he recalled the incident. A contemptuous respect shown in his eyes. He addressed the pale san-nin then, “Orochimaru, I demand to have 200 sacrifices for this insolent woman.”

Remembering how the snake acted disrespectfully towards Kabuto, Tsunade took a gamble. She interrupted, “You, Snake, you think Orochimaru summoned you? Think again. Look at his arms, they are devoid of any chakra and soul, he did not summon you. It was his servant that called you here.”

The huge snake rose up and jerked his head violently to shake off the two sound ninja. He stared at Orochimaru’s useless arms and his nostrils flared. His vehement eyes turned and faced Kabuto directly. His tongue forked out as he jeered furiously, “Who are you to summon me? You used Orochimaru’s blood to bring me! I have no pact with you. How dare you!” In uncontrollable rage, he lounged towards Kabuto.

Orochimaru yelled to his subordinate, “Lead the snake out of here. He won’t listen to me anymore. He might try to kill me now.”

Without a word, Kabuto obediently headed away from the village with the snake chasing him closely behind.

------------------------------------------------

Shizune inadvertently licked her lips as she watched Kakashi undress. She cursed herself internally for getting a little aroused, but she couldn’t help it. Ninja bodies were always so well-defined and rippled. She gathered some chakra on her hands and placed them on his broad shoulders and started to rub her hands in a circular fashion that was meant to build desire more than heal.

Kakashi took a quick intake of air as he felt her hands on him. Oh man, did it feel good to have a woman touch him again. If only she was Tsunade-hime, he wished. At that moment, he stood up abruptly and shook her hands off him. He announced, “I’m fine. I don’t think I need you to check up on me. I’m perfectly healthy…and really, all this attention from the medics is embarrassing.”

“But I’m worried about you. The voices you are hearing, you might be delusional.” She reasoned.

Kakashi thought for a moment “Okay, I have an idea, if we go 50 yards and find Anko and Kurenai, you’ll believe me right? Do we have a deal?”

Good, he took the bait. The plan all along was to bring him to the girls. She grudgingly accepted, “Yes, but if you are wrong, I have to give you a full physical.”

Somewhere in Konoha, a white-haired san-nin was having a nosebleed right now.

---------------------------------------

Things worked out better than the Hokage expected. She had gotten rid of Kabuto and now it was a one-on-one fight with her ex-teammate. She almost felt sorry for Orochimaru. She thoroughly embarrassed him last time, it was almost unfair. With a satisfied smile, Tsunade dared Orochimaru, “Is that all you got? How can you fight me without your right-hand man? Do you remember how I beat you last time? Do you want a repeat? Your cheap blood tricks won’t scare me anymore.” Without waiting for an answer, she rushed at him.

---------------------------------------

Shizune followed Kakashi as he led the way to the source of the ‘voices’. She was content to walk behind him and stare at his chiseled back. She contemplated ghosting her hand lightly down along the curve of his back to the small of his spine, down to--. Her reverie was interrupted when he turned his head and placed his finger on his lips to signal for her discretion. He crouched down and guided Shizune to sit beside him to spy.

The medic-nin gave him a puzzled look and poked through the bushes. Indeed, she saw Kurenai and Anko in a very heated discussion. From her view, she could see their tousled hair and their disheveled clothing. She watched Kurenai reach for Anko’s face in an adoring fashion as she mouthed the words, “I’m sorry, I never wanted to hurt you…but I do care about you. It wasn’t just the sake talking… my feelings for you are real.” Anko reacted by tearfully smiling and hugging her. Kurenai pulled back and looked deeply into her eyes and pressed her lips to Anko's lips in a slow and tender kiss.

Shizune let out a small gasp and looked away. Feigning her discomfort at watching such a scandalous display of affection, she turned to Kakashi and whispered, “Okay, I believe you. Let’s go back to the training grounds.” She saw Kakashi fully engrossed in the action and thought that this mission was easier than she anticipated. Maybe it was overkill to have all of them involved.

Kakashi wasn’t about to leave now especially when it was getting good and hot. “Not yet, I have to-.” His voice trailed off as his attention was diverted. His eyes widened and he licked his lips as he continued to watch the two steamy kunoichi french kiss. Anko started to return Kurenai’s kiss and tightened her arms around her sparring partner.

Awkwardly, Shizune found herself wondering if she needed to direct the women to slow down. She tried to send them a message with a look, “Slow down…at this rate, you’ll both be naked in 5 minutes.”

It was slight but Kakashi could feel his Gedo Mark pulsing, which terrified him. He turned to Shizune to see if she could hear it, but she seemed more engrossed in watching the kunoichi. His Gedo Mark was compelling him to leave. Not caring anymore if he would be discovered, he stood up and said to Shizune, “I’ve got to go.”

Kakashi’s sudden movement startled the other girls and forced them to action. “No, you can’t leave, Kakashi. You’ve seen too much.” Anko threatened.

“Anko, I’m not telling anyone. I’m going.” He turned to leave.

Kurenai blocked his path. “We’re serious, Kakashi. Not a soul. Not even Asuma.”

He raised his hands up, “Everyone, I’m not going to tell a soul, but I have to leave. I think Tsunade needs me.”

Shizune corrected him, “Tsunade-sama?” Only people who were very close or intimate with the Hokage could address her without honorifics.

“Yes, Tsunade. I have a feeling that she needs me right now.” Kakashi started to get impatient.

“No, she doesn’t.” Shizune said frankly. She began to feel anxious about how they could restrain Kakashi. Now this was going to be challenging. She knew that since they weren’t allowed to harm him, it would be almost impossible. With a ninja as skilled as Kakashi, if you didn't go all out, there was no chance of success. Her instinct told her that the best possible outcome was to delay him.

“This was all a rouse wasn’t it? You don’t want me to go to her.” The copy-genius figured it out. Suddenly, the surroundings started to change. He felt his limbs wrapped around with vines and he was suddenly lying down on a tree. He recognized the jounin’s signature move. “Kurenai, come on, stop this now.”

Kurenai appeared from above the trunk of the tree and stroked her hands down his chest. “Oh man, don’t tell me you are all going to seduce me too?” He started to worry when he saw Anko slowly climb on top of him.

Kakashi realized that he was close to losing control. He had to do something drastic. As he mentally blocked out their caresses, multiple strategies floated through his mind. He eliminated all of them and to make matters worse, he was running out of time. He delved into his memories, quickly assessing all his techniques, but they all seemed to be ineffective. In desperation, an image of Tsunade provided a flash of inspiration. A slow smile spread over his face as he finally had his answer for his plan of attack. He had to out-pervert them.

He transformed into Asuma. Anko laughed at this idea. She looked at Kurenai and teased, “Well isn’t this convenient, it looks like Asuma finally gets that threesome he’s always wanted!”

“Kakashi, did you think I’d feel guilty if you looked like my boyfriend? You silly ninja, Asuma understands all kunoichi have these kinds of missions.” Kurenai chided him.

“Care for a foursome?” Shizune asked innocently.

Kakashi almost died from excitement at that point. He started to bang his head back against the tree in frustration. They were so obviously not playing fair. Who could survive a real live harem?

Shizune then gave Anko such a smoldering look, Kakashi couldn’t think. For the third time again, he blinked in disbelief. Shizune licked Anko’s lips and slowly slipped her tongue inside. From his view, the medic-nin was exploring her friend’s mouth with a passion he didn’t know Shizune possessed.

Shizune withdrew from Anko’s mouth and started to move on to Kurenai. He knew that if any of them continued, he would be lost. He decided to transform into another ninja.

“Wow, I hope the springtime of youth does not fail me now!” He bellowed in his best Gai impression.

It was enough of a shock to make Anko jump 5 feet off Kakashi. “Damnit Kakashi, I think I threw up a little in my mouth.” Although Anko was a professional for these types of situations, she had been traumatized by Gai. She easily fell for this trick.

Without missing a beat however, Kurenai gave him an alluring look. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Anko. I think Gai is hot. Can you imagine his stamina Shizune?”

Shizune murmured in approval and continued her movements along his body to plant a kiss on Kurenai. Her every motion rubbed her warm body along his torso. He felt self-conscious because he knew she had felt his hardness through their clothes.

Okay, Gai wasn’t repulsive enough for them. The copy-ninja decided to use his last resort. He transformed into a dog.

Immediately both girls leaped off him in disgust and revulsion. This was a whole new level of perversity that they were not willing to aspire. They were no match for Kakashi’s perverted mind. Kurenai looked at the whimpering dog with respect, “Okay, you got us good Kakashi. You win.”

With a cloud of smoke, the dog transformed back into a very panting Kakashi.

Shaking her head in resignation, the medic-nin told him honestly, “Kakashi, our mission was to keep you subdued. It’s been 50 minutes. I hope that was enough for Tsunade-sama… but before you go, let me give you a different potion.”

Kakashi looked at her apprehensively. “What is it?” He eyed the small bottle suspiciously.

“This will negate the Spanish Fly I gave you.” She grinned sheepishly.

He swallowed it thankfully. “You know, you really didn’t need to give me the Spanish Fly. I’ve already fantasized about all of you before.” He teased.

Before Shizune could decide to slap him, thank him or blush, the pervert dashed off in Tsunade’s direction. Elsewhere in Konoha, the san-nin with a nosebleed fell off a tree.

-------------------------------------

There was no trace of worry in Orochimaru’s face though his body bore the marks of Tsunade’s barrage of punches and kicks. “How much more punishment can your body take?” She taunted.

As cold as ever, he appeared to have an answer to her challenge. “Such fighting words from The Legendary Kunoichi. Too bad my arms don’t work yet. I would have summoned your Hokage relatives, your grandfather or your grand-uncle to fight you. Or maybe I should have summoned Dan or Nawaki? They may not have been as skilled as the Shodaime or Nidaime, but it would have been amusing.”

Those twisted words strengthened her resolve, “You have just proven what I have felt. You are not human. There is no ounce of humanity left in you. How could you think of something so evil?”

Orochimaru’s face lit up as if he was complimented. “Oh? It’s easy. In fact, I have an even better idea… I can activate the Gedo Mark. In fact, if I’m within sight of a Gedo Mark victim, I could even control him.” He was pleased with this revelation.

Tsunade retorted, “Well, I don’t see any Gedo Mark victims here, Orochimaru. So you are out of luck.”

“That’s where you’re wrong.” His wicked laugh resonated throughout the forest. He uttered three words that terrified her, “Look behind you.”

---------------------------------------

AN: I did not get this chapter beta'd so let me know if you find errors. For those of you still following this story, yes, I do intend to finish it. Thanks for sticking around. As always, your reviews are much appreciated. Merry Xmas everyone! Please review.