Disguised Curses

You know the drill, bold for our dear fox demon, '..' for thoughts, ".." for talking. i hope the wait was worth it....





CH 17: Secrets? What secrets??



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Naruto stood for a moment, watching Kimi walk away. He hadn’t really intended to react like that. Something vaguely feral and territorial rose in him when he saw her bring Neji down, and he followed the rushing instinct. But yet he wasn’t regretting it. He remember the slight rush from when she’d bared her throat. It confused him, but it’d felt good, heady. He was content with the results though. He’d won, maybe too easily, but he was soothed that Neji was okay /mine/.



Something slightly rough brushed against his leg and drew his attention downwards. A small sand shape was rubbing against him, and he picked it up. A crude fox shape stared at him before dissolving back into sand. He got the hint and headed toward Gaara.



“You fought well, Naruto.” Gaara’s voice was pitched low enough for just the two of them to hear. “But you seemed more feral than you should have. A normal ninja might not have held up so well. A civilian wouldn’t have had a chance.”



Naruto scuffed a foot as he looked sheepishly at his friend. “I overreacted, I know. I’m still trying to get used to some things.”



Gaara glanced back into the sparring circle; one of his ninja was getting creamed by Sasuke. As long as none of his people ended up gravely hurt, he didn’t care. Ninja challenged each other at their own risk. A gesture of his hand spun the sand into a thin wall between him and the rest of the audience. “Naruto, you’re reacting this way toward Kimi, but both times it’s been about the Hyuga. Why are you protecting him?” Green eyes leveled a cold stare, centered right into Naruto’s face. He squirmed.



“Look, it’s just something that happened after I got back recently, something I have to work out with Kyuu.” Gaara’s look didn’t soften any, nor did he look away.



“You’re treating him like a lover, or like prey. Shukaku may be gone, but even to me he smells like food.” He didn’t have to wait for a reaction, it was immediate and almost volatile. Naruto turned on Gaara, eyes blazing red as he growled out warnings.



“Mine, Gaara. He’s my prey to chase.” His hands twitched, fighting to reach out against Gaara, before the blonde ninja collapsed to his knees, hugging himself. His body quivered with the need to lash out, to do something, anything. He whimpered. “It doesn’t feel wrong when I act on it, Gaara. Mostly, I don’t even think, it’s just pure reaction. Just an urge stuck in my mind.”



“Kyuubi’s, or yours?”



Naruto shook his head. “I can’t always tell. Especially now.” He turned big blue eyes at Gaara, rimmed and lined with that deep crimson. “I know you’ve seen some of the changes, or you wouldn’t be asking me about this. I thought I could handle this, but now I’m not so sure. I’m finding the instincts aren’t necessarily safe.”



“Nothing is safe when you deal with demons, Naruto.” Gaara gave him that look- no longer blank, but way older than his years would suggest. It was somehow different than the ‘aged’ look most ninjas had even after years in service. “There was no way I could work with Shukaku like you’re managing to do with Kyuubi. Too much hate, blood lust, and rage.”



Naruto slowly uncurled himself from his spot in the dirt, but didn’t get up. He didn’t trust himself yet. “I don’t know what to do, Gaara. I can’t keep control like this, yet I can’t go back. Pushing this further...” He shuddered. “Gaara, if my eyes are just the start, what else will follow? Will I lose my humanity so much that I can’t hide it behind a henge? I can’t even hide my eyes as it is!! If it gets much worse...”



“Naruto.” The blond paused in his minor rant. “We can talk about this later. Your worry can be faced in a more private talk.” Naruto’s attention drew back to the other ninja, and returned to Gaara. “Later, then. I really need to talk, and you’re the only one who really understands.”



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Dusk settled slowly over the desert, casting the sand in oddly shaped shadows. Naruto relaxed in his room, having planned to meet with Gaara later, after true dark had settled in. He was meditating, or at least trying to, focusing on the fine lines between himself, as a host, and Kyuubi, as his permanent ‘guest’. It was easiest, and less incurring of consequences to start with his senses. He kept his eyes closed, starting with his hearing, before moving on to scent. The rooms, built to keep the occasional sandstorm out, were thick enough he could barely hear farther than the immediate hallway and rooms to either side. Sasuke was quiet to the one side, giving off his brooding, moody aura. The other room seemed empty, and the hallway had few travelers, none of them registering stronger than the average civilian. He let his hearing fade to the usual “normal” and then opened Kyuubi’s chakra to his nose, his sense of smell rocketing beyond average. He’d bet it was as strong- maybe stronger- than Kiba and Akamaru, because there was no reason that he should be still smelling the hawk girl on him. Shino’s lighter, dry scent appeared, and he quickly pinpointed the tiny, spicy scent of one of his beetles, perched by his door. Sasuke’s rank, scaly odor, tainted as it was, also lingered from his close contact with him. Both these, and the other teases from his comrades, he was used to and accepted. The wild, pine laced aroma puzzled him. He wouldn’t have imagined the girl to have that particular flavor to her personal scent. It teased him, the perfume of the deep woods- pine and rain and the faint traces of musk. It reminded him of Konoha, out where the big oaks and maple and smaller aspens gave way to the prickly evergreen towers. It drew him, unresisting, to the door. Eyes shut tight, he slipped into the hallway and tracked the trickling perfume, managing to avoid the walls, until he finally felt her presence and he opened his eyes.



Naruto found himself before a large door, a tiny plaque marking it as a training room. He pushed the door a fraction, red irises glinting in the dim light as he waited silently for several long minutes. Kimi was executing a series of kata, her body moving in swift patterns, turning simple taijutsu into an art. He’d seen Lee do something similar, but her style was obviously different, and there were motions where he knew weapons should have been in her hands, increasing the damage inflicted. He stayed hidden until she came to a slow stop.



“You didn’t use moves like this against me, earlier.” His voice was rough, and her scent was still flowing strongly up his nose. He was no longer feeling aggressive towards her. In fact, with it being his focus, he felt strangely calm.



Honey brown orbs flicked his direction. “I wasn’t the one acting like an animal instead of a human. There are other means to fighting than succumbing to a bestial, primal urge. You were walking the line.”



“Sorry. My control sometimes sucks.” He grinned a bit. “How about a different round? Nothing beyond taijutsu and basic ninjutsu. Just normal people out to have some fun.”



“Fun? You don’t seem the type to get fun from a simple spar. Maybe an all out challenge would be your type.” A sly look crossed her eyes. “You look just as wild as earlier, but yet, not as violent. I haven’t seen eyes like yours before.”



He blinked, reality coming back a bit. He hardly ever let other people see him anymore when he was casually playing with Kyuubi’s chakra, especially like this. He didn’t know that his eyes remained glowing red, cat slits dark within the bright swirl of color. “Sorry,” he mumbled.



Kimi stepped in close, not quite breaching his personal space but enough that he felt Kyuubi stir in his mind. “You’re different, Naruto-san. Don’t be sorry about that. Cherish your differences. Accept them; embrace what you are. Otherwise it’s only an additional problem in life.”



Naruto felt the chuckle escaping him, and he didn’t resist. Her words were ironic to him. “I know what I am, Kimi-san. It’s not me that needs to accept what I am. It’s everyone else that can’t tolerate me.” His voice grew cold, harsh, tones he hardly used. “At least you have a family that’s like you and can accept what you are. People like me and Gaara are different; finding acceptance is rare. Finding true friends is hard. Everyone wants to use us, turn beings like us, like me, into nothing more than a weapon. Ninja may be tools, but we’re treated less than even that. That is how our fate is, even if we try to make a new one.”



‘You’re being pessimistic, kit. You know better.’ Kyuubi’s voice whispered into his mind. The fox was right- those words didn’t sound like him. But he knew it for the truth, as how the outside world viewed him and other jinchuuriki. Naruto had fought hard, still fought to rise above those presentiments and doubts.



“What are you, in truth?”



Crimson eyes creased for a moment. “I know who I am, but what?” He shrugged. “I’m not so certain anymore.” ‘Liar. You know what we are.’ He sighed. Kyuubi wasn’t playing nice today. ‘Should we tell her, though?’ ‘If she cannot be trusted then we can take care of her. She is different, something that may be prey if I were myself. She may be a worthy adversary for us.'



“I accepted what I am a long time back. I’m a human that plays host to a demon sealed within. I had no choice in it, as most of the others like me didn’t. I’ve been considered the demon in disguise or merely trapped in human form.”



“What demon?” She was vaguely familiar with the legends she’d come across while touring. Sometimes people like her were considered lesser demons, but there were nine of legend, that contained unfathomed power and were feared above all.



‘Let me speak to her. Let me show my real face and see if she’s really so interested in knowing the truth.’ ‘Not a chance, Kyuubi. I know your tricks. You need to behave while we’re in Gaara’s territory, remember?’ A snort echoed through his mind, and he felt the big beast settle like a live weight. All things considering, the fox had been behaving, even though he’d been poking his nose into everything. He hadn’t tried to forcefully take over, and except for a few minor losses of control, Naruto hadn’t let anything get out of hand.



Naruto felt muted chakra before he answered, and postponed his response. He tried to identify the source, but his sensitivity had declined. “Whoever is watching us, come on out.” Almost immediately Sasuke and Neji appeared, frowning at his untimely disappearance from his room. Shino hid in the shadows further back, his glasses glinting in the light the only thing betraying his position. Naruto sighed. He didn’t want to deal with this yet, but it seemed all things were leading to this point, now rather than later. “Come in and sit down. We have to talk.” Sasuke stepped into the room, taking a place a few feet from him, while Neji and Shino kept their distance. Shikamaru slipped through last, nonchalance written over his features, even as he leaned almost tensely against the wall. Naruto sat on the floor, forcing himself to relax before addressing the last low-key presence in the room. “I know you’re here, Gaara. Talk with us?”



The sand nin came and finished the rough circle formed by Kimi and the young men around him. Sasuke was the only one that dared sit very close to the blond as he closed his eyes and stopped to think. “Most of you know, at least on a superficial level, why I’m so different. I was a newborn when the demon Kyuubi was sealed in me. The seal started cracking around four, maybe five years ago. Since then some of you have been witness to what happens when I lose control.” Shudders chased down his body at a few of the memories. “I know I’ve been acting even more different since the last mission. Tsunade is worried that I will suddenly lose all control and destroy the village and people I love and have sworn to protect. I can’t promise that there’s no chance of it happening, just that I’m trying to keep myself in check as much as possible. It’s not easy, and it won’t get better for a while, I believe. But I swear, I will do everything I can to keep the worst from happening.”



“You still haven’t explained why you’re acting so differently, or given a reason for Lady Tsunade’s sudden extreme concern. She would not have given those orders if this was just another flexing of the seal.” Shino’s quiet, critical voice asked one of the big questions left, coincidentally, also one of the ones Naruto really didn’t want to answer yet. He really wasn’t sure how to explain it to everyone, the merging between him and Kyuubi, because he didn’t know if he really knew himself. He had been dreading asking the fox for certain details.



‘You’re acting like a weakling, kit. These people claim to be friends, so tell them. If they can’t deal with it then they aren’t your friends, are they?’ Practical as ever. Naruto sighed. Sometimes the damn fox made sense but still annoyed him. 'You could always just let me explain to them...’



‘For the last time! I’m not letting you have control of my body!!’ Kyuubi growled, not threatening, just annoyed, and in a flash showed Naruto another way. Naruto blinked for a moment, trying to process the thought, then turned a hopeful face to Sasuke. The Uchiha glared for a moment, but as Naruto explained in a hoarse whisper, he nodded, then frowned. “Naruto, I could do that, but not without breaking a few rules set out by the Godaime and the council when I returned.”



Interested expressions went around at those words. The other three Konoha nins glanced at each other- noting there was a lot of that happening lately. Shino, as current questioner, had to ask the obvious question. “Which rules would what be breaking?”



“High level jutsu of any sort, any use of my curse seal, any usage of my Sharingan barring self defense. Basically, I’m restricted to Academy level stuff until further notice,” Sasuke grumbled. He had bent or broken the one about his Sharingan several times, sometimes from instinct, and then those times with Naruto. But Lady Tsunade had let those she knew about slide, especially once she understood what he was doing to help the fox bearer out. “What Naruto has suggested would be risky, not to mention breaking most of those rules. I have a substitute idea; it’d be as much of a rule breaker, but less risky.”



“Why would any of this need to be done anyway?”



“To let Kyuubi explain what I cannot.” Attention immediately turned on Naruto. “I want to give you answers, but it’d take forever for me to try and explain everything. So I was thinking, like a Q and A session with the annoying fox, in a way that won’t risk letting him out...” He shrugged, a hand scratching idly at his wild blond hair. “The best I could think of is when I can get into my mind and talk to him, and I know Sasuke can, and that maybe he could help you guys to maybe do the same kind of thing?”



“Baka.” Sasuke grunted next to him. “It’s risky as hell to take a second party with you into a third person’s mind.” He crossed his arms in front of him and slouched just slightly. “It’d be safer to use the Tsukiyomi or a variation like it, because it wouldn’t take all night, and plus, it’d be much easier to let it go and let people get out of the jutsu.”



“I thought that was a realm of pain.” Sasuke grimaced. Tsukiyomi was, indeed, the perfect setting to inflict pain and wear an enemy down. “Tsukiyomi is a variable genjutsu; you can use it for almost anything. But it doesn’t matter, it is a jutsu powered by a Sharingan stronger than mine. I have an alternative method that would allow the same results, but be much less… overbearing. You would also be able to escape the same way as from any other general genjutsu.”



Silence reigned for a few long minutes as the various individuals thought and mentally debated over the risks of an unknown jutsu, the potential answers, and the breaking of rules set out for the only Uchiha.



“You guys want to know what’s really going on, this is your best bet. At least right now.” Eyes blinked at the blond, responding to the soft order hidden in his tone. His own eyes were glowing that strange mix of blue and red, and slowly they found themselves nodding in agreement.



Sasuke smirked. Naruto wasn’t the only one about to lose his masks. He quickly went through the seals and flexed his hands, casting the jutsu room- wide, dragging everyone in the circle into a colorful copy. The light stayed dim, except for a little bit around each person. Gaara had an empty clay pot by his knee; Shino’s bugs could be seen crawling slowly along spots on his skin. A much smaller version of Kimi’s bird form perched on her shoulder. Shikamaru’s hands were covered in shadow, and a pair of snakes curled around Sasuke and leaned their heads on his hands. Behind him was a shadowy effect of his ‘wings’ from his cursed seal. But attention wasn’t on any of them. Everyone was glancing between Naruto and Neji, as their other true selves were revealed.



Kyuubi towered- if managing to be small enough to fit into the room could be towering- above Naruto’s head, an evil grin painting his maw as he stared at Kimi and then Neji. Crimson chakra swirled around Naruto, but he sat, once again looking out with clear blue eyes and a softly smiling face. There were no whisker marks on his cheeks, and his face looked fuller, more gentle without them. He was staring in shock at Neji. Suddenly, several things made a lot more sense.



A large black mound nestled in Neji’s lap. He was staring at it with something akin to surprise and a vague horror, like whatever it was shouldn’t really exist. A small bit lifted, and as everyone watched, a fragile bird’s head on a long slender neck appeared out of the bundle of darkness. It shook itself and waddled from the comfort of Neji’s body, displaying a sleek ebony swan with the emptiest, whitest orbs ever seen on a bird. They were blank enough to seem blind, yet the swan’s attention turned to each in turn. Huge wings spread wide and high, and with a start Neji shook himself and nearly lunged for his counterpart. It quieted immediately and he led it back to his side, softly stroking the silky feathers under his fingers. His glare challenged everyone to comment as a faint blush rose at the revelation of his secret.



“Hell. No wonder Kyuubi thinks I should pounce you.”



Jaws drop as Neji turns a shade of red to rival the aforementioned fox’s chakra. Kimi snickered from her position several feet away, and even Sasuke and Gaara are showing signs of amusement. All sounds stop and total concentration is ripped from the spontaneous outburst as a rumbling, almost gratingly deep voice laughs. “No. I said he’d make the perfect prey. ‘Pouncing’ is only a tiny piece of what would happen.”

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A/N: OK, so it took over a month to get this chapter out. not only was it a pain, i have a nine month old that is drastically limiting my writing time. *sniffles* so i promise i will keep up my writings, but darn it, the updates won't be so common. like they were ever. haha.

My thanks and loves to all my wonderful reviewers for the last chapter!! i do suggest going back and reading the end of the last chapter again, i edited it. oh, yes, conversations ensuing for next chapter. probably more Neji POV than anything (at least at first). umm.. that's it. R&R, You guys!! reviews feed the muse, and the muse is sputtering along hungry right now!! or rate! i will accept either (both??) lol. I hope you like this chapter, created with love. and a wicked mean streak. *chuckles* later y'all!