Hard Love Life

Hidan awoke in the shower, Kakuzu holding him up. With a pop the jutsu released. “I like my penis you know?” he said off handedly, slightly loopy from blood loss.

Kakuzu rolled his eyes. “Bye the way, the whole marry me thing, I didn’t mean it.”

“When you do mean it, my answer will be the same.”

“How do Jashinists marry?”

"We don't. Chastity, chastity, chastity. No marriage at all." Hidan said, "There are partnerships but it's only for those who need to be cared for. Older followers."

"So, I'm pretty much sending you to hell by having sex with you?" Kakuzu asked, raising a brow and looking at him.

"Yup. Pretty much." Hidan said, "I'm still not going to stop worshiping him however. To much fun."

"Then we should stop having sex," Kakuzu shook his head and continued to wash up. "Though, I suppose heaven is too good for you."

Hidan stuck his tongue out at Kakuzu. "I'm not stopping. And I doubt you could go without fucking my tight ass." Hidan licked Kakuzu's chest, "Can you use your threads to put my shattered hip together? They'll fuse nicely if you do."

Kakuzu plugged the drain and started up the bath, opting to start taking a bath with his lover instead. "I'm sure I could go a week without fucking you." Kakuzu sat down in the tub and pulled Hidan in-between his legs. "I can't stitch bones."

"Not with me tempting you at every turn." Hidan said, "Have you ever tried doing it? I don't think so. They can go threw rock after all. How is bone different?"

"I'm a man that can resist temptation very well," Kakuzu murmured, kissing the top of Hidan's head. "Fine, I'll try." Kakuzu attempted to sow together Hidan's hips.

"Oh really? How did this all start out? Me seducing you into having sex with me. Remember?" Hidan flinched as Kakuzu sewed his bones. Bone pain was the worst.

"I remember, you were practically begging me to have sex with you," Kakuzu said, trailing his fingers down Hidan's chest. "You're so sexy." He reached out and turned off the water.

"I never actually asked you to have sex with me." Hidan said, sighing in pleasure as Kakuzu touched his chest, "You're sexy too."

"You were begging with your eyes," Kakuzu said, sliding his fingers over Hidan's thighs and pushing them apart. "I'm not sexy."

"I wouldn't know. I can only see my eyes in a mirror." Hidan said, turning to look at what Kakuzu was doing, "You're sexy to me."

"You have pretty eyes," Kakuzu murmured, kissing the top of Hidan's head. He slipped his hand around Hidan's member, pumping it slowly. "I'm glad I'm sexy to someone."

"You have nice eyes too. They glow at night. Did you know that?" Hidan asked, squirming a bit as Kakuzu pumped him, "Ah~! I'm glad your glad." Hidan ran his fingers over his own chest, playing with his nipples.

"I've never looked at myself in the mirror at night, so I wouldn't know," Kakuzu replied, picking up the speed at which he was pumping Hidan's member.

Hidan shivered in delight. "Mmm. Kakuzu, I like your hands... They're so rough. It feels wonderful." Hidan murmured, reaching down to touch himself as well.

Kakuzu sighed slightly and rested his head on Hidan's shoulder, watching his and Hidan's hands pleasure him. "You like everything about me."

Hidan smiled, his fingers focusing directly under the head of his member. "Not true. I don't like you yelling in front of the kids. It really scares them."

Kakuzu began to fondle Hidan's scrotum, tugging on it softly. "I try not to yell in front of the kids. That was a one time thing."

Hidan started panting, his orgasm approaching fast. "You better not... It really does scare them..." Hidan grabbed Kakuzu's other hand and wrapped it around the tip of his member, "Pump it really fast."

Kakuzu licked up the side of Hidan's neck before pressing a kiss on Hidan's temple. "I love you." He began to pump Hidan's member vigorously,

Hidan squirmed, his cum squirting into Kakuzu's hands as he came. "I-I love you too." he said softly, "Would you marry me?"

Kakuzu rinsed off his hands in the tub, making the water a murky white. He looked to the side when Hidan asked if he'd marry him. "I don't know... I mean... We've only been together for what, a week? Not even?"

"Would you some day?" Hidan asked, rolling over and kissing Kakuzu softly.

"Of course I would. Some day," Kakuzu replied, kissing Hidan back.

"May I ask why you asked me to marry you in the first place?" Hidan asked again, rubbing Kakuzu's chest, "It seems like an odd thing to ask."

"I only asked you because I was caught up in the heat of passion. Like when you first said you loved me, but you meant that you loved my dick," Kakuzu said, stroking Hidan's hair.

"I see." Hidan said, sitting up. "Ow... Hips still hurt a bit. Want to rub against me? Like uh... Hump?"

Kakuzu nodded and closed his eyes, relaxing in the bath. He cracked open his eyes and gave Hidan an odd look when he asked if he wanted to hump him. "Uh… No, I'm not a dog."

"I saw it in that book. You rub your dick against mine." Hidan said, scratching his chest.

Kakuzu blinked. "That just sounds awkward."

"You’re boring some times. It's not." Hidan said, grabbing both their members and rubbing them together, "Is this really all that bad?"

Kakuzu smacked Hidan's hand and then covered himself up. "Yes it really is that bad."

"You're boring." Hidan said again, "You hardly try new things. Things you may like. How stupid."

"I'm not boring, I'm old-fashioned, there's a difference," Kakuzu grumbled.

"What's so old fashioned about doing that?" Hidan asked again.

"I don't like trying new things because I like the things the way they are. I'm old fashioned because I think most sex acts too taboo to try. You're lucky that we're not only doing it in missionary," Kakuzu said.

"You having sex with a man that's sixty-nine years younger then you is taboo." Hidan said.

"I try not to think of the age difference when I'm having sex with you," Kakuzu retorted

"I'm still a man. If you’re as old fashioned as you say then you wouldn't want to have sex with me. So you're not wanting to try new things is stupid."

"Fine Hidan, you want to try it, go ahead, but I, in no way, will be getting any pleasure from it," Kakuzu uncovered himself so Hidan could do what he was doing earlier.

Hidan huffed. He was intent on making Kakuzu enjoy it. He rubbed the two organs together, hardly letting them touch before rubbing them together a bit firmer.

Kakuzu just closed his eyes and resting his head against the back of the tub.

Hidan continued, trying his hardest. He knew it was working; Kakuzu was growing erect, however Kakuzu didn't react. He rubbed the undersides of the glands together, knowing that was a very sensitive spot.

Kakuzu sighed and looked down at Hidan. "This isn't working, only my body is reacting, not my mind."

"You're a jerk... Can't you try to like this?" Hidan asked, sounding hurt.

"Fine," Kakuzu muttered, relaxing and pretending to like it.

Hidan started again, now adding extra stimulation just to Kakuzu. He really wanted Kakuzu to like this, but in the back of his mind he knew he wouldn't.

Kakuzu let out a fake moan, arching his back up slightly for added effect.

"You're a jerk!" Hidan snapped, roughly pulling on Kakuzu's member, "I said try to like it! Not fake it!" He slapped Kakuzu before twisting Kakuzu's member. "Why can't you like it?!"

Kakuzu hissed in pain when Hidan pulled on Hidan member. "Let me go!" He pulled at Hidan's hand when he twisted his member, thin tears of pain welling up in the corner of his eyes. "Why can't you let go?!"

"You don't deserve to even have this! That's why!" Hidan said, twisting the organ even more, "You're a bastard! An old, smelly, nasty, greedy bastard! Why won't you like it? I'm trying so hard!"

Kakuzu heard a crack and lost all voice and reasonable thought. He could barely move from the pain.

"There. That's what you get. I'm going to play with the girls." Hidan stood up and walked out of the bathroom.

Kakuzu was able to move a little while after and he walked into his and Hidan's room. He picked and chose most of his stuff and dumped it off in his office before moving his bed into his office as well. Hidan had crossed the line when he had broken his penis, so now he wasn't even going to bother talking to him. Kakuzu looked down at his member, sitting on the edge of his bed. He knew he was going to have to go to the hospital now, so he threw on his clothes and headed off to the hospital, very slowly and painfully.

Hidan went to the girls and explained to them that he and their daddy we most likely breaking up, to which neither seemed to understand. He left and went to the only hospital that he knew Kakuzu would go to and told them he would be coming in and paid for the treatment; A healing Jutsu, which was far more expensive then the surgery and left, moving the girls things to his room when He go back to base.

Kakuzu finally made it to the hospital, and found it odd that his treatment was already paid for. He shrugged it off and got the treatment, being able to walk back to the base normally. Slowly, he went back to his new bedroom and sighed, curling up on his bed, He was still so pissed off about Hidan breaking his penis, and wasn't sure if he'd ever forgive him.

The door opened and Seiun and Acheron ran in. "Daddy! Did the treatment momma pay for work?" Seiun asked.

Kakuzu rolled over and pointed to the door. "Out, daddy just wants to be alone right now because your mother did something unforgivable," Kakuzu growled.

Seiun recoiled and grabbed Acheron's hand. "We're s-sorry daddy. We just wanted to know if you were betterer." she started crying, "Living with my grandma was better then you being my daddy. At least momma is nice to us!" She dragged a confused Acheron out the door.

Kakuzu sighed and rolled over, burying his face into the comforter and wondering how today could've gone so wrong just because Hidan wanted to be whiny and hurt him just because he didn't enjoy something.

“I thought you said you wouldn't make the girls cry again."

"Get out! I moved in here to get away from you because you're a brat and broke my goddamn penis just because I didn't enjoy something that you want to do!" Kakuzu threw a lamp Hidan.

"Yeah. And if it wasn't for me you would have had to have gone threw surgery." Hidan said, letting the lamp hit him, "What is it with you and making your daughters cry? Do you enjoy it?

Kakuzu rolled to look at Hidan. "No, I do not like making my daughters cry." He growled. "You owe me one hell of an apology."

"Then why are they crying?" Hidan asked, "I think I already did. I used up every ryo I had so you didn't have to have painful stitches, your foreskin lobbed off, and scar tissue."

"I just told them to get out, I want to be alone, it's understandable." Kakuzu said and sighed quietly, "Come here."

Hidan slowly walked over to Kakuzu, standing just out of arms reach. "What?"

Kakuzu motioned with his arms. "Closer."

Hidan stepped up to the bed. "If you’re going to break my penis I'll just like it."

Kakuzu wrapped his arms around Hidan and pulled him closer. "You know, I have to forgive you because you paid for my medical expenses."

"I see." Hidan said, sitting on the mattress, "You’re not trying to get my guard down?"

Kakuzu shook his head. "No, I'm not trying to get your guard down. I'm still very pissed though, I can't stay mad."

"That doesn't make much sense. You are still mad even though you can't stay mad?" Hidan asked, rubbing Kakuzu's chest.

"It makes sense in my head, and that's all that matters," Kakuzu leaned up and kissed Hidan. "Go get the girls, I want to apologize."

"Alright. I'll get them." Hidan said, standing up and leaving. He returned a while later, Acheron dashing in, "Only Acheron wanted to come."

Kakuzu picked up Acheron and placed her on the bed next to him, whispering something in her ear to make her giggle. He began to tickle her slightly. 'You go tell your sister that, okay?"

"Ogay." Acheron said, skipping out the room.

"What did you say to her?" Hidan asked.

Kakuzu looked at Hidan. "That is a secret between me, Acheron, and Seiun."

Hidan crossed his arms, pouting. "No fair. I’m their mother.”

"Daddy?" Seiun asked, poking her head into the doorway.

Kakuzu looked over at Hidan. "You didn't squeeze them out, you're not their mother," he said teasingly. He looked up at Seiun when she entered and motioned for her to come onto the bed.

"I am so their mother! Don't joke about that!" Hidan snapped as Seiun trotted to Kakuzu, "It's not nice."

Kakuzu ignored Hidan and picked up Seiun. "I'm sorry." he said, nuzzling Seiun’s cheek and tickling her.

"It's okay Daddy." Seiun said, kissing Kakuzu on the cheek, "I'm sorry too."

Kakuzu pulled Seiun closer and hugged her tightly. "Daddy won't yell at you ever again."

"Okay. Daddy, can me an' Acheron go play with Tobi?" Seiun asked, hugging Kakuzu back.

Kakuzu nodded and let her go. "Stay away from the evil plant man though. He'll eat you."

"Okay. We will. Bye Daddy, bye Momma." Seiun grabbed Acheron's hand and left, humming.

"I'm not their mother?"

Kakuzu looked over at Hidan. "Oh, calm down, I was just kidding."

"It was mean." Hidan said, walking over to Kakuzu and sitting in his lap, "Fucking sexy Heathen."

Kakuzu wrapped his arms around Hidan's waist. "I know, I'm sorry."

"I forgive you." Hidan replied, his legs wrapping around Kakuzu's waist, "I love you." He rested his head on Kakuzu's shoulder, huffing. "Has my hair grown back a bit?"

Kakuzu pulled Hidan closer and stroked his hair. "I love you too." He looked at the top of Hidan's head. "Yes."

"Oh good. I'm still mad about you setting it on fire."

"You deserved that one though," Kakuzu said, trailing his hands up and down his back. "I need a smoke, but I'm not supposed to get up for a day or two,"

"Good. No smoke for you. Did you know smoking could make you incompetent? No erection." Hidan said, kissing Kakuzu's neck, "Not that you want it right now. I'm just warning you and al."

"Smoking is the only reason I'm still alive. It keeps my blood pressure way down." Kakuzu muttered, detaching his hand and searching under the mattress for his cigarettes. He found them and lit one up.

"Tantric massage does the same thing." Hidan said, taking away the cigarette, "What's so great about these?" He took a deep drag from it, only to start coughing. "Shit that is crap!"

"But I can't have you giving me a tantric massage in the middle of the street." Kakuzu frowned when Hidan took his cigarette from him and reached for it. "Give me it back."

"We're not in the street. We're in your office." Hidan said, taking another puff from the cigarette just to piss Kakuzu off, "I'm lucky I can't get addicted to drugs." He exhaled the smoke in Kakuzu's face.

"Whatever, just give me back my cigarette," Kakuzu muttered, grabbing at his cigarette. He inhaled the smoke that Hidan blew in his face. "Ah, that's nice..."

"Open your mouth and breath in when I exhale." Hidan said, taking a third drag and placing an open mouthed kiss on Kakuzu's lips.

Kakuzu did what Hidan's wanted him to do and breathed in the delicious smoke.

"There. Is that enough for you?" Hidan asked.

"No I want my cigarette back," Kakuzu huffed and reached for it.

"What? Is the Hidan cigarette not good enough for you?" Hidan asked, stuffing it back in Kakuzu's mouth.

"No, it is, but I don't like to make you inhale the smoke," Kakuzu said, taking back the cigarette hastily.

"Bah. I’ll get over it. Still tastes like shit however." Hidan said, kissing Kakuzu's neck, "Does it taste better from me?"

Kakuzu shook his head, "It doesn't taste like shit, it tastes delicious." He continued to smoke his cigarette. "Yes, it tastes much better from you."

"It does to me." Hidan said, gently sucking on Kakuzu's neck, "Then why not smoke me?"

"I guess smoking is in the eye of the beholder," Kakuzu moaned at Hidan sucking on his neck. "Because that... I don't know."

"Is it because you don't want me to be..." Hidan paused to bite Kakuzu, a bit of blood dribbling down the elder’s neck, "Unhappy?"

Kakuzu growled when Hidan bit him, not liking the sensation. "Yes, that is exactly why."

Hidan softly sucked on the bite, lapping up Kakuzu's delicious blood. "That's sweet of you."

"If I have a hickey, I'm going to kill you," Kakuzu muttered.

"I can leave hickeys if I want." Hidan said, "The shirts you wear have high collars."

"I don't want hickeys though," Kakuzu said, pulling Hidan's head away from his neck.

"Hickeys are bruises. You're bleeding where I'm sucking. No hickeys." Hidan said, returning to Kakuzu's neck.

"So I'm going to have another scar?" Kakuzu growled, and pulled Hidan away again.

"It's not even big. It's like you were nicked by a razor." Hidan said, moving back, "Stop worrying. Besides you cut your arm for me. Remember?"

"Yeah, yeah," Kakuzu muttered, "but that was before you broke my penis. I'd scar myself for you before that."

"I made it all better. It doesn't count anymore." Hidan said, "And this won't scar. Do you want some sort of retaliation? Fine. Break something of mine. Something I won't like you breaking."

"It will always count, you don't believe the pain I went through," Kakuzu said, "Anything I break you'll enjoy, you sick masochistic freak."

"I don't like my bones breaking. Break every bone in my body. Bash in my skull." Hidan said, pouting softly, "Do what you used to do to me. I never liked that."

"I'm not that cruel," Kakuzu grunted, rolling away from Hidan and groaning, his member still sensitive.

"Do it. If it will make you feel better. But you'll need to fix it." Hidan said, "Why'd you groan?"

"See, I'll need to fix it. It's not worth my time if I have to fix it," Kakuzu said, "I groaned because it still hurts."

"Fuck my mouth. I... I hate that." Hidan said, "After you're better of course."

“How would you know if you'd hate it or not? I've never done that to you before." Kakuzu asked.

"Well... Uh... Maybe not you." Hidan said, picking at his arm.

"... Oh... Did they... Do that to you?" Kakuzu looked over at Hidan.

"Yeah... They did." Hidan replied, resting his head on Kakuzu's side.

Kakuzu took Hidan into his arms, "My poor Hidan."

"Don't pity me like that." Hidan said, changing the subject quickly, "Why do you still hurt? The jutsu should have healed that up completely.

Kakuzu let the subject drop, "It healed the torn ligaments, but there's still bruises everywhere."

"I paid for the full treatment! Bruises and everything!" Hidan said, "We're going back and getting it all fixed!"

"Actually," Kakuzu said, looking off to the side, "I asked her to keep the bruises there."

"What?! Why? I paid for it! I lost money! Kakuzu how could you?!" Hidan asked, obviously hurt.

"Because! It gave me an excuse to refuse sex!" Kakuzu said, covering himself so Hidan's wouldn't hurt him again.

"You didn't need to put your self in pain! I would have understood! You should have gotten back fifteen hundred ryo! That was everything I ever had! My live savings!" Hidan buried his face in his hands, shaking his head.

"I've tried to refuse it and all you do is whine and bitch to me about it! You want fifteen hundred ryo back, go into my safe and take back fifteen hundred ryo," Kakuzu turned around and wrapped his arms around Hidan.

“Yeah well those other times you hadn’t been hurt before hand and the times you were hurt you totally wanted to have sex!”

"Actually, I think I prefer it this way, not having sex until I heal. And your money didn't go to waste. I had her heal my hip in place of fully healing my penis," Kakuzu said, shaking his head and thinking about not having sex for a while

"I'm not saying you should have sex! Rest! That's what I'm saying and what I would understand." Hidan threw a tiny fit, "Who cares about the hip, it was healing just fine!"

Kakuzu growled and pointed to the door. "Get. Out." He glared. "If you don't care about my hip, then you don't care about me."

"I'm not leaving." Hidan said stubbornly.

"Leave,' Kakuzu said, pushing Hidan slightly.

"No. I care about your hip, but I don't care that you got it fixed." Hidan said, crossing his arms over his chest, "It, as I said, was healing fine."

Kakuzu just turned away from Hidan and then slowly pushed himself out of bed, walking slowly to the door.

"Fine I'll leave! Just know if you get hurt again I'm never helping you." Hidan snapped, shoving Kakuzu away as he left, "And you need to work hard to get me, because as of right now you are my ex."

Kakuzu fell on his ass when Hidan pushed him away, but he quickly stood up and shouted out the door to Hidan. "Good, I'm glad, because I never wanted to be with you anyways!"

"Yeah, right. You wanted to be with me enough to get kids!" Hidan snapped, "The girls are staying with you! I don't want them any more!" Hidan stormed down the hall, wiping away tears brought on by what Kakuzu said.

Kakuzu slammed the door and slid down it, running his hands through his hair, letting a few stray tears drip down his face. He hit his head against the door and opened it once more. "No one would ever want to be with a slut like you!"

Hidan started to cry even harder, his heart breaking. How dare Kakuzu call him a slut, he didn't ask to be raped, it wasn't his fault. "I hate you! You better sleep with one eye open because you're now at the top of my list of heathens to kill!" When Hidan got back to his room he tossed all of the girls things out of the door before slamming it closed and locking it up tight, crying hysterically.

Kakuzu tucked his knees under his chin before standing up and going to Deidara's room, asking him to take care of the girls for a little bit. He took all of the girl's things and dropping them off at Deidara's room. He walked back to his office and closed the door.

Hidan continued to cry for a long time. Finally stopping as he started performing a ritual that soon turned into a desperate attempt to end his hurting. He ripped out his heart and stabbed it over and over. He finally stopped moving all together and sat in the large pool of blood, staring at nothing.

Kakuzu sat on his bed and began to pull out his hair slowly. He let the hair fall from his hands and turned over, falling asleep.

Seiun hesitantly opened the door to Kakuzu's office. "Daddy? You okay?" she asked, crawling onto the bed and shook him softly.

Kakuzu turned around and looked at Seiun sadly. "I thought Aunty Deidara was going to spend time with you?"

"He did. You've been asleep a while." She said, rubbing her eye, "I was too, but some scary wailing woke me up. Where's momma?"

"I thought he'd take care of you for a couple of weeks," Kakuzu said, rolling over. "I don't know where your mother is. And honestly, I don't care."

"Why can't you take care of us Daddy? Do you not love me and Acheron anymore?" Seiun asked, hugging Kakuzu's side, "Don't not love us like momma."

Kakuzu sighed and hugged Seiun. "I still love you. I'm not a horrible person like your mother."

"What did momma do to make you mad at him?" Seiun asked, hugging Kakuzu back, "It looked like you made up when I came in."

"Your mother is just ignorant, not bothering to care about anyone but himself," Kakuzu growled, looking off to the side.

"But what did he do? Did momma hurt you again?" Seiun pouted, "Didn’t momma use all his money to make you better?"

"No, your mother didn't hurt me again," Kakuzu explained, "He just got mad when I fixed the thing he hurt partially and my hip completely. Because if I didn't get my hip fixed, I'd be crippled permanently."

"What's a slut?" Seiun asked, "I heard you call momma that."

"I'll tell you when you're older, right now you shouldn't use that word," Kakuzu said.

"Is momma one of those?" Seiun continued to pry, "Why did you love momma in the first place?"

"No...Your mother isn't one of those," Kakuzu sighed, "I still love him."

"Then why did you call him that? It sounds bad." Seiun smooshed Kakuzu's face in her hands, giving him fish lips, "You said you didn't want to be with him. I don't get it. Why say those things? It makes momma cry."

“When you're an adult, you say a lot of things you don't mean just to hurt people because it makes you feel just a little bit better," Kakuzu said, taking Seiun's hands off his face gently.

"Did saying all that make you feel better?"

"No... It made me feel worse."

Seiun kissed Kakuzu's nose. "Poor daddy. What will make you feel better?"

Kakuzu hugged her tightly, "You're making me feel better, but I'd like it if your mother came back."

"Go get him then." Seiun said, pouting, "I'm not."

"Ha," Kakuzu laughed, "I'd probably have my head chopped off if I tried."

"Momma wouldn't do that." Seiun said, "But if you want to stay safe then talk to him threw the door."

"You don't know him, he would, because he's violent and stupid," Kakuzu said. "He wouldn't listen."

"Your a ninja right?" Seiun asked, "Do something to keep him still."

"I can keep him still but that doesn’t make him listen."

"You can't not listen. And Momma loves you. He'll listen, now go." Seiun pushed Kakuzu gently, urging him to go on.

Kakuzu smiled and nodded, "You're stubborn kid, you should teach your sister to be like that."

"Trust me, Acheron is stubborn." Seiun said, pushing Kakuzu with a little more force.

Kakuzu began towards his old room and stood outside the door for a few minutes before knocking. "Hidan... Can we talk?"

Hidan turned to the door. "About what? Go away. Fucking bastard."

"Hidan, I'm sorry, just hear me out," Kakuzu pounded softly on the door.

"You just want sex, but lets hear your lame meaningless shit." Hidan said, stabbing his heart again, the removed organ still twitching.

"I didn't mean what I said and I take it all back. It's just that... When you said it was over, I needed to make you feel like I felt. I didn't mean to," Kakuzu said and slid down Hidan's door.

"I said you could get me back. Now I'm not sure if I feel the same." Hidan replied coldly, "How do I even know you love me?"

Kakuzu sighed. "You don't, and I guess I could never convince you again that I love you. Especially because when I first said it, I was lying to you."

Hidan started crying again, standing and going to the door. "Show me that you love me now. I may forgive you..." he said as he unlocked the door.

Kakuzu stood up when he heard the door unlock and swung he door open, taking Hidan into his arms and placing feather-light kisses everywhere. "I do love you."

"Show me." Hidan said again, not responding to Kakuzu's actions, "Not threw sex.”

“Will you marry me?” Kakuzu asked, sinking to one knee and taking Hidan’s hand.

“I will marry you.”

Kakuzu sighed and stood up. "I will get us real rings, but Pein-sama will be angry if we use ours."

"Will you sleep with me?"

Kakuzu looked at him. "Sleep with you, as in sex?"

"No. You're not up to it." Hidan said, pouting, "Cuddle with me in bed."

Kakuzu nodded and moved over to Hidan's bed. "C'mon."

Hidan walked to his bed and laid down, pulling the covers over himself. "Sorry that I smell like blood. I did some things."

Kakuzu nodded, "It's okay. And you have some apologizing to do the girls, just to let you know." He crawled into the bed next to Hidan.

"I didn't say anything to them." Hidan mumbled, clinging to Kakuzu, "I'm not a slut."

"You threw out all of their stuff, I think that sent a message to them," Kakuzu said, pushing Hidan away a little to look in his eye. "You're my slut."

"Fine, whatever." Hidan said, looking at Kakuzu sadly, "I'm yours but I'm not a slut."

Kakuzu nuzzled against Hidan, "Fine you're not a slut. You're a whore."

"Stop it... I didn't want to be raped. I'm not a slut or whore, I'm just me." Hidan whispered, pushing Kakuzu away from himself.

"I mean it in an endearing way. Because you're mine... And only mine. My whore, my slut, my... Wife... Husband. Fiancée. Significant other... What ever," Kakuzu said, pulling him closer.

"You can call me anything but those." Hidan said, "It makes my chest ache."

Kakuzu stroked Hidan's cheek and nodded. "Fine I won't call you that."

"Thank you." Hidan started sucking on Kakuzu's neck, licking it from time to time, "Your skin is irresistible."

Kakuzu sighed and rolled his eyes, rolling on his side so he didn't face Hidan. "You're just odd."

Hidan whined softly. "No! Come back! Hold me please."

Kakuzu rolled back over once more and took Hidan into his arms. "No more sucking on my skin. It's a turn on and if I get hard I'll be put through excruciating pain."

"M'sorry. I didn't know. When will you be better?" Hidan asked, nuzzling Kakuzu's chest, "Sorry I threatened to kill you.

"Couple of weeks," Kakuzu said, running a hand down Hidan's chest. "If you need it, maybe I'll let you borrow my vibrator."

"That's not what you said. You said you just have bruising now. That stops hurting in a few days. I know that because I wasn't always immortal." Hidan glared at Kakuzu.

Kakuzu glared back at Hidan. "You also need your punishment of no sex for breaking it in the first place. Even if you did pay for it, I still had to feel it. Not to mention walking was unbearable."

"Stop pissing me off or I will kill you." Hidan snapped, rolling over and away from Kakuzu.

Kakuzu sighed and kissed up the side of Hidan's neck, "I love you. Now where are we going to get married?"

"At a cheep place of course. We'll be doing it in three days. I know a place we can go to be alone." Hidan said, shivering as Kakuzu breathed on his neck, "It's hidden and quaint."

Kakuzu sighed and rolled over, folding his arms behind his head. "I won't be ready in three days."

"Fuck you then. Marry me in three days. You're ready enough. You asked." Hidan said.

"I asked to get back with you, I thought it'd at least be in a month," Kakuzu muttered.

"Nope. I love you more then Jashin-sama. And I love him a lot." Hidan said.

"Have you ever thought that I'm not ready? Why are you being so selfish?" Kakuzu asked.

"Not ready for what? I'm independent." Hidan said, clinging to Kakuzu's side.

"To get married? I asked, but that was because I thought we were going to wait," Kakuzu said.

"What to be ready for? We already fight like we're married and we have the kids. I've... Kinda been loyal and you have too." Hidan said, pouting, "We already covered the big stuff. Not much else to prepare for. I don't want a reception or after party."

"Marriage is a big step. 'Til death do us part. You're immortal and I'm practically immortal so, death isn't very easy to come by," Kakuzu said, kissing Hidan's forehead. "We'd be together forever."

"Is forever such a bad thing?" Hidan asked, "You and me, sex, more kids to take in, a companion, and the sex. Yes sex gets two."

"Speaking of the kids... What are we going to have them become if they do in fact have Chakra in them? We don't know who their parents are," Kakuzu said.

"I don't know. Ninja? Medic ninja would be more helpful." Hidan suggested, "Why are their parents important?"

"Yes..." Kakuzu nodded in agreement, "Because we don't know what their parent's skills were."

"If they had any. It doesn't matter. If they have any they will show up." Hidan said, kissing Kakuzu's lips.

"That's true," Kakuzu murmured, leaning into the kiss.

Hidan sighed and crawled on top of Kakuzu. "You're really warm. You always are." he yawned, kissing his lover's chest as he fell asleep.

Kakuzu sighed and rubbed Hidan's back when he crawled on top of him, "I try to be really warm."