Time for a change ...

hey guys ...
well that another chapter done, it doesn't contain much but some filler, but i hope you will read it anyways. it is needed for the story.

okey so for the updates it will take a wee bit longer than i expected cous i just had a look at my dissertation and the deadline i have a lot of work to do till 1st of may, i'd thought i was going to be slightly easy but no .... but then again i guess that could be expected when it is the final year essay ... how i'm going to write 10 000 words i'm not sure but i'll get there ... will do as much writing on the story as possible and well on the way with the next chapter so hopefully that will be done before i leave for HK next friday.

anyways i hope you enjoy this and thank you so much u guys for commenting and of cous my beta for her hard work ... goves everyone some norwegian chocolate cous the scottish one isnt good =P.


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chapter 18


It had been a month since Sasuke had walked out of the Uchiha manor and not looked back. He had been living at the temple with Tsunade and the old man. Sasuke could never seem to remember the guy’s name, not that it mattered cause the old man spent all his free time in the inner temple so he didn’t see him much and on the occasion when he did see him he never spoke to him only bowed to show respect. Over the days, he and Tsunade had several conversations about the days he spent in the institution and about his family. Tsunade had also told him that a man named Jiraiya had found information that said the boys were in the elite squad and if Sasuke wanted to he could get a letter to Naruto. Apparently, the soldiers had families and friends and like in any war the communication was kept strictly to letters. Much to Sasuke’s benefit Jiraiya was the postman, the one that went through the mail to check for anything suspicious. That was why Sasuke currently found himself staring at a blank piece of paper at the cashier desk in the bookstore; in the bin next to him lay at least 5 or 6 curled up pieces of paper with a few lines written on each.

Sasuke sighed, he was never the person to show any emotions and now he was trying to convey something onto paper in terms the blond would understand. His concentration was interrupted when a customer entered the store.

“Welcome, if you need any help ma’am just let me know.” The raven moved the piece of paper to the side and watched as the customer roamed the shelves of books. It was quite rare for the bookstore to be busy but since the last bombing in Midtown, the TV tower had been taken down making it impossible for people to watch TV, causing more people tended to come to the bookstore to buy books to read. The customer seemed to have found what she was looking for and was now standing in front of him.

“Will that be all ma’am?” Sasuke asked as he rang up her book.

“Yes thank you … awful with these bombing isn’t it,” the woman replied.

“Yes it is, I heard it was Midtown that was hit this time,” the raven placed the book in a small grey, paper bag.

“Yes I heard that too, apparently 10 people lost their lives, but there are rumors going around that there were more, the government is keeping it hush, hush on the numbers.” She took the small bag and thanked him.

“Well the government has never been an institution one could trust during a war,” he smiled at the woman who thanked him and left the store. Again, Sasuke found himself alone in the bookstore. He took another glanced at the empty piece of paper before deciding to place the new arrival books on to the shelves.

Itachi stood outside the bookstore, he watched as his little brother read the spine of the books and placed them on the shelf. It had been a month since he saw him last, he remembered getting a phone call from Sasuke then the phone call from his father to tell him to shut Sasuke out. He remembered the look on his little brother’s face when he told him Naruto and the others had been shipped out. It had been a look of fear, a look he never thought he would ever see on his brother’s face. Itachi sighed, he looked at the letter in his hand addressed to his little brother. It had arrived at the house earlier that day but had it not been for him walking in to the living room catching Sakura reading it he would not have known. Itachi sighed again before entering.

‘Ding’ Itachi pushed the door open.

“Welcome, if you need any help just ask,” Sasuke said, not looking in the direction of Itachi.

“Some help would be nice…” Itachi said. Sasuke recognised the voice immediately and snapped his head towards his older brother, narrowing his eyes.

“What do you want?” Sasuke sneered. The older raven sighed.

“Look Sasuke, we need to talk.” Itachi stated, looking at Sasuke who only glared daggers at him. “Please?” Itachi pleaded which was a first for him but then again there was a first time for everything.

“Fine, sit down and I’ll get some coffee.” Sasuke walked over to the counter and placed the remaining books on it before walking towards the coffee machine he had placed in the corner behind the counter. Itachi moved to the sofa and sat down. In front of him was a small table with some magazines and newspapers on it. He frowned when he saw the head line ‘10 soldiers dead in attack’ the war had just begun and the newspapers were reporting everything but the news was overshadowed with all the propaganda which had been forced in where ever there was space. His thoughts were interrupted when a black cup was held in his field of vision. Itachi looked up and grabbed the cup.

“Thanks…” Sasuke did not say anything but nodded slightly before walking around the small table and sitting down at the other end of the sofa. Nobody said a word, the air was filled with awkwardness as the two of them stared into their coffee cups. After about 5 minutes and several sips of the hot coffee, Sasuke was the first to break the silence.

“So … what was so urgent you needed to come here, in person, to talk to me?” The younger raven said. Itachi took a deep breath before he spoke.

“Well … I … I still owe you an answer to the question you asked at the institution.” The older raven did not remove his eyes from his coffee cup. “I just don’t know where to start …”

“How about the beginning?”

“I don’t even know where it begins,” Itachi sighed “but I guess I’ll start with when I was introduced to the institute.” The older took a sip of his coffee and leaned back, letting his head rest upon the sofa back. “I was 15 when father first took me there, it happened by accident really… if Orochimaru hadn’t called father back then, telling him that his presence was required that instance, I would most likely have been dropped by at home before he could go.” Itachi paused a little before continuing “Anyways, when we arrived, Kabuto greeted us by the door and lead us to Orochimaru’s office where he and father began talking business. Back then, I couldn’t fully comprehend all the words spoken in that room but the pictures, the videos, the sound of their screams as the videos were played, still haunt me. I don’t know what you have seen but that was something I wish no one would ever have to see.” Again Itachi paused, the images from the screen flickered through his head, “but as the good boy I was …”

“Still are …” Sasuke added quickly, Itachi ignored the sarcastic comment and continued.

“I never reacted, never said a word whilst looking at those things and when we arrived home, father called me into his office and told me that it was time I started to work for the family business. After that, I frequently visited the institution and was drilled with the activities and various other things needed to run the business. I hated every minute of it, but I had to do it because it was either you or me and despite how bad I felt, I couldn’t let you be dragged into this. I couldn’t let father control you life …” Itachi chuckled a little “but sadly, I failed, I couldn’t or more like since I can’t produce an heir that burden has fallen on you, marriage arrangement in the 21st century. Anyways, a year after I was introduced to the institute I met Kakashi, of course, I had seen him around and knew of his reputation in the business world. He told me he knew what my father and Orochimaru were up to, he even pulled out a file with pictures and reports on the institution and its people, things I didn’t even know… things I really didn’t want to know.”

Itachi felt sick again, “They used children, innocent children … Kakashi showed me the pictures of their dead bodies … I threw up in his bin basket.” Itachi chuckled, “he told me he worked with a group of people that tried to save as many kids they possibly could from the institution and possibly try to shut it down with any luck … that’s how the boys got out.” The older raven pointed out, “after my stomach had settled he asked me to help him …” Itachi fell silent again

“And …?”Sasuke asked curious.

“And I’ve been a spy in the family business. I’ve been trained to take over ever since.” Sasuke’s eyes widened a little. He hadn’t expected Itachi to agree to help, it was so uncharacteristic of an Uchiha to help others without getting something in return. Sasuke studied his brothe’rs face for any signs of deceit but there was none.

“Why did you do it?” Sasuke asked.

“I don’t know … their eyes, their faces were either so empty or full of fear. But as I grew older, I realised that when I looked at those photos I saw us … you. Sasuke …” Itachi turned to look at Sasuke, “our family is not a family. There is no love, no bond, just duty to uphold the honour of the family name… Sasuke don’t become like father or me, unable to love, unable to form a bond with someone. It isn’t too late for you … I saw you with Naruto, you smiled, your eyes revealed emotions I could only wish to feel … so promise me Sasuke never let him go because he can save you.”

Itachi placed the envelope with the letter, Naruto had sent to the house, on the sofa and slid it across to Sasuke. “This came for you after you left … I caught Sakura read it in the living room.” Sasuke looked at the white envelope that had his name and address written on it. Somehow, he knew Naruto had sent it to him and that thought made him feel warm on the inside. Suddenly, Sasuke felt the sofa shift a little and he noticed Itachi had gotten off the sofa.

“I’ll come around with more updates, but I doubt it will ever end because in order to gain knowledge of the unknown one has to break the rules.” The older raven walked towards the door but stopped when his hand had reached the handle. “Remember what I said little brother, don’t let him go…” with that said Itachi left the store.

Sasuke looked back down at the envelope and picked it up. His fingers traced the ink spelling out his name as he studied the hand writing. Sasuke was written in small but beautiful letters, it was like Naruto had taken his time to make it perfect but Sasuke could see the hesitation marks in the letters. The raven didn’t care, this was how Naruto wrote his name.

Sasuke took the letter out of the envelope, placing the envelope on the small table before taking off his shoes and curling up on the sofa. He unfolded the piece of paper in his hand and began to read.

Dear Sasuke,

How are you Sasuke?
I’m fine. Me, Shiakamaru and Gaara are sharing a room together with two other people. They are nice. Kiba seems to be very fond of dogs, he shows us pictures of his puppies all the time, they are very cute. I wonder what it would be like to have a puppy or maybe a cat. Here at base there is a black cat with a white spot on his tail, we feed it once in a while when it comes around. I even petted it once and it made a purring noise, Kiba said its the sound all cats make when they are being petted, it is their way of saying they like it. The cat is very soft. The other guy is named Choji, he always eats. Gaara said that he even eats when he sleeps. I asked once but Choji says he can’t be sure. We have been in combat for the last 3 weeks but according to the captain we have the upper hand. Me, Gaara and Shikamaru are part of a special group that goes on missions on the enemy’s side so we don’t go to the front line unless we are really needed. It gets a little boring not having much to do and the beds are not really that comfortable. They are very tiny so you can’t fit two people in it like the one I slept in before with you. I liked that. Maybe we can do it again sometime?

Sasuke chuckled as he read that line, he wondered if the blond knew what he was really asking with that question.

I hope you are not mad at me for not being there when you came to pick me up. I wanted to be, but Orochimaru said I was needed here and that we were the only ones that could help. Oh, can you tell Tsunade that I’m sorry we left the bookstore without permission, we will take care of it when we come back. Will you be home when we come back? Because Orochimaru said we get to go back to Tsunade when the war is finished and I’d like that, to see you again. I hope you aren’t too angry with me since I broke our promise, I feel very bad about it. Guilt I think Iruka called it.

Anyways this is my first time writing a letter so I’m not sure I have done it right. Choji says a letter should contain something about what I do here and feelings and other things I do here. I’m not sure how to do that, I never knew you could put your feelings in a letter. Iruka always told me that feelings are inside of me. But I did try my best to put some in the envelope.

Naruto xxx (not sure what the x means but Kiba said I had to put 3 down next to my name)

Sasuke felt a rush of emotions flood through him, guilt, sadness, happiness, love. He was happy Naruto had written him a letter, he loved the boy for trying, for thinking of him. But this also reminded him of how far away Naruto was, that he could not touch and kiss him, couldn’t claim him and he felt so guilty for not being able to save the blond from going, he had broken his promise, not Naruto. He pressed the letter to his chest and closed his eyes. Sasuke sat like that for a good 10 minutes, flipping through his memories of the blond, before getting up and retrieving the blank piece of paper and the pen from the cashier desk. He sat back down on the sofa and placed a magazine and the paper on his lap and began writing.

Dear Naruto,

I miss you ……..

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there we are, don't forget to comment please XD