The Restricted Section

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. I do not own the basis for the story idea “The Restricted Section”.


The Restricted Section
By 11


Chapter 18

“I love you.”

The kindest smile he’d ever known and that pale hand brushed through his own dark feather-black hair.

“We’ll always be together won’t we?”

He laughed, amused, “Of course. After all, you and I are very special brothers. We need each other.”

He smiled in response and attempted to snuggle closer into his arm. The other laughed kindly and placed that stronger arm around his shoulders hugging him close. He’d thought that this was contentment. He’d thought that this was permanent.

He thought he knew his brother. At that time he had known such kindness from him. He didn’t understand the cold words.

“There is nothing. You cannot help me.”

He wanted to, there was nothing that he would not have done if his brother had only asked it of him.

That laugh was so warm and so kind, that affectionate and friendly gesture turned so harsh and cold it became like poisoned knives thrust into him with every syllable with every mirthless laugh and every cold and mocking grin.

He knew how cruel his brother could be, even then he knew. But he was never like that toward Sasuke. Never ever… they were brothers, they had a special bond – his brother said so.

“Foolish child.”

His body seemed to tear apart as his brother moved away, the sleek black metal body of the car bearing him away.

He remembered screaming, he remembered crying. He remembered how numb his fingers became, gripping onto the window sill.

Then his brother’s warm and loving hands, once so kind and so comforting to him. They became hard and cold utensils peeling him away and shoved him aside.

That smile once so bright and joyous became something cold and cruel, heartless and demonic. Those dark eyes so like his own bore a tint of red, and he couldn’t hardly look at them for the malice and uncaring found there.

“Foolish little brother.”

He refused to take him with him, and he hit the concrete, his head struck somewhere hard. And he heard his last mirthless laugh as his brother left his life for so many years. Years and years, that he would never know him, never see him.

His mother would find him later on the driveway. She’d wash his feet and head and hands. His father hosed down the driveway, but for a few weeks more the stain of blood where Sasuke fell remained.

The rest of events form there blurred together and faded away, until he could live his life entirely separate from his brother.

He entered high school about the time he began to live without, at that time he lost his virginity, and pursued others for the same.

He thought he knew his brother so well back then, but he didn’t know him at all, probably not ever. Even now, all he really knew of him was that every smile no matter how seemingly kind, was false and cruel and cold.

Every deceptively friendly word was a poisonous curse in disguise. He had accepted that his brother’s potential for cruelty had somehow turned on him, for whatever reason, and he moved on without him.

He never wanted to meet the other again.

Dark reflective eyes pooled over with tears, and no matter how much small pale hands tried to wipe them away, they just kept falling. He couldn’t stop them. “Why?” he cried.

A cold cruel laugh echoed malice in his ears to spur the child’s whimpers, and ruby black eyes stared back in pure delight. “Because I could.”

Sasuke hated Itachi.

More than anything he hated him, and this kind of hate was only possible because he had loved him once, more than anything else. His brother, his world, at first he thought the reason he himself existed was just for his brother.

He worshiped and idolized this putrid scum of the earth, and so now he could hate him with the same fierce intensity of being with which he had loved him. And in an instant that hate could consume him as wholly as had his love.

`

“What’s this?” his brother tilted his head with a smile considering his younger sibling, “No greeting or welcome for you older brother?”

“I have no welcome for you.” Sasuke told him icily. How dare he, how dare this guy… how dare he say that, after he was the one to abandon ‘him’.

Itachi seemed to wince and his arms crossed over his chest as if in protection, “That hurts, though I guess we haven’t seen each other in a while.”

Sadness… no. Even now there was that twist in his tone, and a taint in his voice - mocking, cold, and sinister. He would never fall for that kind of act – not again.

“You tried to leave with me too, didn’t you?” Itachi wondered aloud, “Am I no longer your beloved big brother?”

“Yes,” Sasuke practically snarled, to make his message clear, “and my ‘beloved big brother’ shoved me back to the drive way and sped off.”

Itachi grinned, and Sasuke scowled back at the almost weasel expression. “Yes, I do suppose such an action could be considered cruel…” he seemed to sigh, as if he was at all regretful.

“Suppose?” Sasuke practically growled, “I had a concussion for a week! I could have bled to death!” he snarled.

“But you didn’t.” Itachi smiled pleasantly.

“Why did you even do it?” Sasuke asked. “You were a scourge to our parents. I was the only one who even cared about you in our entire family! So why would you do that? To ‘me’?!”

He didn’t let him respond, any response would have been a lie any way. But there was no guarantee he’d answer truthfully anyway, was there?

“And now you just show up! Out of the blue?!”

Itachi regarded him carefully, “You want to know why?” he asked back the twist of a putrid smile pulling at his lips.

“Why? Because I could.”

The same answer as back then. Concerning all the others. Why he would pick fights with their parents, why he’d fist-fight with their cousins. Why he purposely began to start looking for trouble and cause misery.

“You seem happy now.” Itachi’s eyes appraised his brother. “Something to do with that pretty blond thing?”

“You know nothing.”

“I know what you are, I know what you do.” Itachi smiled pleasantly enough, “I know that happiness won’t last forever. So do you.”

“I despite you.” Sasuke hissed and turned away, he went a brisk pace, and his brother didn’t seem to be following him.

He walked a few block before turning around and heading back around the long way to his apartment. Naruto was probably already back, but he wanted to make sure his brother wasn’t following him. Though he certainly didn’t appear to be.

Satisfied that he had no tail, Sasuke headed to his apartment complex and let himself into his now shared appointment. He felt so drained, he just wanted to sink into Naruto’s arms and just hold the other for a while, and breathe his familiar smell in.

The scent of cooking noodles and soy and miso assaulted his nose when he opened the door.

“Sasuke, welcome back!” Naruto’s friendly familiar voice called from the kitchen, and he followed it. The blond just finished slurping a noodle past pink lips when he looked up with a grin. “The noodles are almost done.”

This was okay, this was what he wanted, this was contentment, and still was, probably always would be. Naruto, bright blond and colorful, sky blue eyes focused on him, cheerful and bright.

Just seeing his face grinning at him made him feel better, but… it felt too much like the poison in him was still there. Naruto cocked his head at him lips pressed shut.

“You okay?” Naruto wondered. “I’m making the noodles the regular way – no microwave this time. So it counts.”

“No it’s not that.” Sasuke shook his head, looking over the countertop and the different frozen vegetable bags with substance yet unused.

Ed was on the counter chewing on the unused bits of onion with the same distaste that bratty kids sucked on lemons.

“Then what is it? You look like you saw a ten foot roach or something.”

“Ed’s eating onions.” He stated simply, unable to think of something more witty or clever to say.

Naruto glanced down as well, “Yeah. Better be careful with that stuff, it’s like crack to him.”

The blond swept his hand over the counter, taking the bits of onion into his hand and tossing them into the sink and the disposal.

Ed looked up and started running! Just a little faster, useless tiny legs! No!! The onions!! His one true love found at last-!!

And the harsh grating gurgle of the disposal signaled the end. Ed stared down in dismay at the black pit.

He would have shed a tear if geckoes tear glands worked when they were sad. Currently genetics provided no such feature.

Curse them onion-killers!

“You already ate Ed, and you can’t be too hyper tonight.” Naruto warned as he headed back for the noodles and strainer.

Sasuke still stood useless in the doorway, a dour expression marring his face, eyes staring darkly at the floor deep in thought. Naruto frowned, he knew he was on edge about something but he couldn’t guess what.

“Want to help set the table? I’m just going to mix in the greens and sauce after this.” Naruto suggested with a smile. Sasuke nodded, and picked out a pair of plates, forks, cups, and knives. It didn’t take long to set out.

Sasuke caught the reflection of dark hair and eyes, pale pasty skin in the reflection of steel. He glared down at the knife, and he felt a shudder of revulsion.

With a few minor differences… they looked too alike, even now, after spending so many years apart.

He suddenly had the insane urge to pick up the knife and cut off all his hair or add a permanent scar, just something to drastically alter his appearance from that man’s.

He really did despise him. What an answer, what an answer, not even an explanation – because he could?!

But he recognized that thought. Because he could, because their misery gave him pleasure. That was how he used to justify hurting others, if he ever justified it. He felt like he would vomit.

But the bile never came, and he hated him, he hated the mirror. Because he was just like a mirror, like looking back into the mirror of months ago. He used to be exactly like that. He swallowed back down the acid taste.

Sasuke was fine now. He was better, he’d never become that; and his brother hadn’t changed at all. He would be lonely and unhappy forever. Sasuke gave a short snort of laughter, forced just to clear his head.

What a piece of work that guy turned out to be.

Sasuke smiled as Naruto set down the noodle dish, it smelled good and the warmth wafted over the table and breathing it in purged the poison instantly. Now he would enjoy dinner with Naruto, and not worry about that guy any more.

Itachi couldn’t be in town for long anyway.

`

He didn’t feel like starting a conversation. It wasn’t as if the redhead made it easy to do so either. He only came over to see Ed anyway, there was no reason to attempt uneasy communication that the redhead would wind up killing anyway.

The gecko crawled over the redhead’s hands and Gaara sniffed him delicately and his nose wrinkled slightly, but he didn’t say anything.

Sasuke’s shoe scuffed the floor slightly. He wished that Gaara had met him out somewhere instead, so he could occupy himself while the silent kid spent time with his reptilian not-personally-owned pet.

But this was fine, except that Naruto was supposed to be back five minutes ago. Ah, but it was only five minutes, that made it okay. The key clicked in the lock, lizard and red the first to look up.

The door opened, “Sasuke? Do you know if Shino has the notes from last Tuesday? Apparently I was asleep for half the discussion on that one article on the--! Oh hey Gaara!”

Naruto stumbled in and stopped himself when he saw their guests. Gaara cocked his head to the side regarding the blond.

“It was so quiet in here, geez, Gaara what about practicing keeping up a conversation?” Naruto chided tutting his tongue as he went to their room to drop his school books off to the floor.

The redhead frowned and didn’t respond. “Ignoring me now huh?” Naruto wondered walking back in.

“I’m not.” Gaara stated simply.

“Yes you are.” Naruto sighed, “I asked why you aren’t trying to talk to people.”

“I don’t want to.”

“Not even Sasuke?” the blond prodded with some irritation. “He’s looking after Ed for you afterall.”

“You’ve been feeding him onions.”

Sasuke snorted, and turned aside. Listening to the two of them was utterly absurd. Neither of them could speak sanity, really.

“I’m sorry to report little Edgar, has become an onion addict.” Naruto said seriously, “If we’re not watchful with him he’ll need rehabilitation soon.”

Gaara only nodded.

“Did you ever feed him onions before?”

“Once.” He admitted.

“And?”

Gaara paused to consider it. “He ate the whole thing.”

“He ate a whole onion.”

“Yes.”

“So is it strictly off his diet?”

Gaara’s eyes didn’t leave the floor. “I don’t know.”

“So you’re trusting us with his dietary needs and hygiene and affection – most of the time – and general well-being.” Naruto shook his head. “It’s okay. We won’t let him turn into a crack addict.”

“You’ve fed him crack too?” Gaara wondered mournfully.

“No! Onions are crack!”

“They are?” Gaara seemed seriously shocked.

“Not really! For Ed they are!”

Gaara didn’t respond, green eyes falling back to the floor.

“You didn’t know that? Didn’t you ever take ‘Health’? I thought that suck-fest was mandatory or something.” Naruto seemed truly astounded.

“So you’re living with Sasuke now.” Gaara changed the subject. “The two of you are ‘together’ now.”

“Yeah,” Naruto started and frowned slightly, glancing at Sasuke as if for confirmation, “Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

Sasuke only shrugged. As far as what they’d tell people Sasuke would leave that to Naruto. It didn’t matter so much in title anyway; they were living together and Sasuke was happier than he’d ever been – that was the only thing of consequence.

Gaara glanced up at Sasuke. “You know your brother’s in town?”

His muscles stiffened involuntarily, and Sasuke couldn’t even nod. “I know.” He answered.

Green eyes turned away and the boy focused his attention back on the tiny scaly creature in his hands. Taking a moment’s reprieve for his nonexistent social and conversational skills.

Sasuke leaned back with his arms crossed, staring to the side. Naruto was looking at him, but he didn’t feel like meeting his eyes. If he met his eyes, then the blond would ask him. He didn’t want to have to answer.

Naruto frowned slightly. It had been a while since he’d known Sasuke, but never was it mentioned that he had a brother. He wished Sasuke would look at him, but the raven-head seemed adamant on not doing that.

He asked anyway. “You didn’t tell me you had a brother.”

“I don’t consider us related.” Sasuke responded curtly.

Naruto glanced over at Gaara instead, “They’re on bad terms for some reason?”

Gaara shrugged.

“You can tell me, you know.”

Sasuke glared.

“Not with him here I can’t.” Gaara said not looking up from Ed. Maybe if he just didn’t say anything they’d leave him alone. Maybe he could pretend he was going to the bathroom and take Ed with him until he was ready to leave.

Naruto glanced up at the paler boy’s scowling face. “Okay, let’s go outside for a bit then.” He suggested with a grin, attempting to steer the redhead out the door.

Sasuke’s hand shot forward opting to grab the blond’s arm to prevent him from dragging the redhead outside.

Gaara frowned, and rubbing his thumb absently against Ed’s belly as the gecko watches the exchange with large intelligent eyes, displaying the tiniest bit of annoyance.

This was his time with the red-hair but there was no hair, which was fine since these fingers were here just for him, but still these humans were being so troublesome!

Gaara eventually turned toward Sasuke offering Ed back. “I actually have to be somewhere soon.” He said and Ed sat at attention at this troublesome transfer – human drama! If not for that he could have enjoyed himself a bit longer!

First the onions, now red’s hands! Would the injustice never end?!

“Thanks for taking care of him for me.” Gaara nodded before quickly detaching himself to make for the door.

“Gaara, wait!” Naruto called after him, “I’m sorry! Come back! I won’t ask again! Aw… crud.”

The door shut behind him and he turned to Sasuke sourly, “What’s that about anyway? Was there a knife-fight involved or something? Honestly.”

“No.” Sasuke released his arm, “I’m going to go see people at the diner for a while. You have to get to work too don’t you?”

Blue eyes looked up at the clock and he frowned. “Not for fifteen minutes. It’s not that far from here.”

“Well I’ll head out then,” Sasuke said picking up his jacket from the couch just in case, and got his keys from the countertop before heading for the door. “I’ll drop by the store to see you a little later.”

“If you catch up to Gaara drag him along with you!” Naruto suggested as Sasuke headed out the door. “Hey don’t leave Ed here! I thought you were taking him with you!”

Not today, he finally got a shower since he thought Gaara was taking him for the afternoon, he didn’t want to mess up his hair that soon!

Sasuke couldn’t even see the redhead anymore, and good luck dragging that kid anywhere if he wasn’t Naruto. Down the stairs though, he spotted the kid at the crosswalk, he waited a short ways from him for the light to change.

“You should be careful.” Gaara said quietly, and Sasuke glanced over. He was talking to him right?

“Since you used to be just like him – you should know what he’s planning, why he’s here.” Gaara continued idly.

Sasuke faced front, and sighed. “It’s not good.” But he had no idea what he could do, he didn’t even know where the attack might come from. Where was he vulnerable right now? He couldn’t think of anything.

The light changed and the two crossed the street, Gaara drifting away to somewhere while Sasuke made his way on toward the diner. From the outside window he could already see Shino, Shikamaru, Temari and Hinata seated at a booth table.

“Are you sure they were closed?”

“Positive.”

Sasuke took a seat in the middle of a rather heated discussion concerning the shortage of coffee at midnight on a yesterday.

“And the one down the street was closed too?” Shikamaru wondered.

“Do you think I would have stayed up at 12am and caffeine deprived, if there was a single one on the planet that was open?!”

“But seriously where else can a person get their coffee fix? It’s like the only place in the universe that does caffeine…” Shino wondered idly. “I can’t think of one.”

“I thought they made a news announcement that they’d be closing all stores though.” Hinata considered, “And it was only for three hours.”

“So why did midnight, their busiest hour have to be one of those?” Temari seethed slightly annoyed.

“Well you have your coffee now don’t you? So don’t complain.” Shikamaru eventually sighed, giving up on the possibility of getting coffee somewhere besides a specific haunt.

“Sasuke do you normally get coffee at 12am?” Shino wondered as the raven-head took a seat.

“I can’t say that I prefer buying to my expresso machine.” He responded.

“Lucky bastard.” Temari muttered, “And where did you afford an expresso machine anyway?”

“It was a gift, for my last birthday.” Sasuke responded curtly. “Get your relatives to buy you one. Or ask Hinata. Neji has one.”

“Neji’s in Germany now.” Temari whined.

“So? He didn’t take his expresso with him I think.”

“No, he did.” Hinata corrected. “He was really worried that they’d only have tea over there, so he had to bring coffee with him.”

“Wow. That’s overkill.” Shino whistled, “I mean, even for him – way too much. I’m sure they have coffee in Germany.”

“They do?” Hinata wondered.

“Probably. Somewhere…” Shikamaru shrugged.

“You don’t know, do you?” Temari frowned.

“I don’t know.” Shino relented.

“Figures.” Temari sighed. “And that is why the apocalypse occurred yesterday / this morning at 2400 / 0000 hours.”

“Really? Is this about the coffee deprivation last night?” Karin chirped as she waltzed in and took a seat, “Like killer right? No caffeine! But thank goodness it was late! I don’t know what I’d have done if I couldn’t get my latte this morning!”

“Good morning Karin,” Shino greeted, “What’s up?”

“You mean you don’t know?!” She gaped in shock.

“That was a rhetorical question-…” Shino started but the red haired girl cut him off almost immediately.

“Of course not! That’s why I’m here! To tell you all!” Karin grinned and flipped her hair back over her shoulder. “So here’s the latest!”

“I just heard this from Sasori! – Who by the way is screwing Deidara, who knew, right?! – Itachi was actually dating Kisame a few months before he died!”

Karin paused briefly, “No offense, Sasuke! But we all know what kind of person your brother is.” She continued, “So anyway--!”

“He’s in town.” Sasuke muttered.

Karin gasped! “How did you know!! Did someone tell you already?!”

“I saw him.” Sasuke admitted with some disdain.

Karin reared back as if Sasuke had just spat out a cockroach. “How long is he in town for?!” she asked in utter disgust. “Hopefully not for long!”

“What does he want around here anyway?” Shino scowled.

Sasuke shook his head. Karin frowned, “No idea!” she waved it off, dismissing the whole sordid affair with apparent ease from her mind. “I really hope he leaves soon! He’ll stink up the whole town otherwise!”

“Sasuke! Have you told Naruto about him yet?” Hinata suddenly gasped, dismay marring her soft features upon reading his blank expression.

Shoot.

“You should warn him, since he’s never met Itachi.” Temari suggested, “You have his cell or something, right?”

But before she was done speaking, Sasuke was already bolting for the door. Karin groaned, “Oh he’s in town?! Ugh! Just the thought makes me feel icky!”

“Ditto.”

“Same.”

`

The bell of the door dinged slightly, and Naruto shut his book with a grin, “Took you a while to get here. How far is the diner anyway-?” He cut himself off and did a double take. It was… not Sasuke.

Looked a bit like him, walked a bit like him, but definitely wasn’t him.

“Ah, sorry about that, for a minute I thought you were somebody else.” Naruto grinned, “Feel free to browse, we just got a whole new section in for the wet ‘n wild scene, if you’d like to know.”

And it had taken forever for Jiraiya to watch them all before putting them on the shelves. Geez. The man couldn’t have been too much older than Sasuke though, maybe four or five years, tops.

He was definitely graduated, though he didn’t look like he was in any particular profession yet. Dark eyes glanced around the shop before landing back on the blond. “You are… ‘Naruto’?”

“Yes,” the blond nodded, “Anything I can help you with? If we don’t have it here or on reserve, we can get it on the list. I suppose one of our previous customers recommended us?”

“Not really.” The man approached the desk, watching the youth intently. Naruto fought the urge to frown and snap at him. For all the creeps they got in here, this guy was much creepier.

Suddenly he smiled, “Oh I’m so sorry!” he excused himself, “I don’t mean to be weird or anything. Hi, I’m Itachi.” He introduced himself sheepish to be regarded with whatever slightly cold eyes Naruto had turned on him.

The blond hadn’t thought he’d actually given any sort of facial expression away yet though. Good intuition maybe, or perhaps he was just always aware of how he came off. Strange guy.

“I’m only here in town for a short while, and I believe you know my younger brother,” he explained, with a smile.

Naruto cocked his head to the side, now that he was close enough this guy’s eyes weren’t completely dark, there were bits of red in them too. “His name is Sasuke, you are acquainted with him?”

Naruto nearly choked on his tongue – but hid it artfully with a short cough. “Oh sure, I know Sasuke.” Naruto grinned in greeting – of course he knew him! He was living with him!

So this was the brother that Sasuke didn’t care for. He didn’t seem like such a bad guy, though. “Yes, well… I don’t suppose it’s any of my business but um…” Itachi looked away and coughed, his hand motioning in the air searching for the term.

“You aren’t… ‘involved’?”

“We’re friends.” Naruto shrugged, “I’ve known him a pretty long while now.”

“Less than a year?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you fucking?”

What the hell? “What the hell kind of question is that?!” Naruto asked incredulous, “Even if you are his brother – it’s not like that’s your business! Was the first thing I asked you ‘when did you lose your virginity?’? No.”

“I was fifteen, and yes I realize this is rather out of the blue and probably would be considered inappropriate under most circumstances, but,” Itachi appeared to cower before Naruto’s anger.

“But if you are, I just hope you aren’t doing anything you’d regret… I assume you know his reputation, or…?” Itachi frowned.

“Yes I know. He’s not like that anymore.” Naruto rolled his eyes, “So you don’t have to worry about that.”

“He’s been known to go to great lengths to get his quarry.”

“I told you, it’s not like that.” Naruto snapped, his nerves starting to fray horribly. This was almost worse than when Neji tried to tell him. What was up with this guy?!

Itachi blinked and then his eyes widened, “Oh, you’re in love with him, aren’t you?” he said suddenly.

“What?!” Naruto started-

-Itachi cut him off, “Were you originally attracted to men then?”

“What the-?!”

“Are you attracted to men now?”

Naruto’s mouth clipped shut.

“Or just Sasuke?”

He couldn’t bring himself to respond. Anger was there, but so was truth. He’d told the same to Neji. He wasn’t attracted to ‘men’, it was ‘just Sasuke’.

“I don’t mean to pry, I’m terribly sorry if I’ve upset you,” Itachi backed down and looked away sheepish. “I just worry… about my brother and the people he… uses. And even if it’s as you say – well… nothing lasts forever.”

“It would be a shame to be in confusion as far as sexual preference thanks to him.” Itachi sighed, as if he was remembered previous cases. Naruto wanted to hit something – really hard.

Itachi glanced back at him. “Perhaps you’re too far gone. Maybe you’ve been manipulated already.”

The back door the viewing room and back office opened. Jiraiya’s feet stamped over the carpet. “Are you buying anything or not?” the old grouch snapped.

“I’m sorry I was just-”

“If you’re not buying – get out!” Jiraiya practically snarled, “I don’t take to loiterers! Go on, get out!”

“Excuse me then.” Itachi nodded his head and turned for the door. Dark eyes flecked with red glanced back just once, and old toady eyes caught the slight turning of the man’s lips as he vanished down the sidewalk.

Jiraiya snorted and crossed his arms. Naruto’s arms were tense, and his back was rigid, jaw set. Anger set in every nerve, but beyond that anger was the reason – the reason he was angry.

There were two reasons, one he had said bad things about Sasuke. But also he had brought to surface doubts that Naruto himself had tucked below the veneer of this period of his life.

He wasn’t gay, it was just Sasuke. But if he wasn’t gay, and he fell in love with a girl for real… he didn’t like to think about leaving the other boy. But he could imagine it, later on in life. What did that mean for now, when he wasn’t entirely sure of it?

“Look out for that guy!” Jiraiya barked brusquely. “He’s bad news. You see him in here again, you shoo him back out that door!”

Naruto nodded. “Yeah.” He agreed.

Jiraiya frowned, “Don’t listen to that shit he said about Sasuke.” Jiraiya told him, “I assume I don’t have to tell you about that, right?”

“Of course.” Naruto laughed grinning back at his employer. Sasuke he didn’t doubt, in so many ways Sasuke had become surer than he himself was. Naruto was doubting himself, and that was going to bode very ill for the next few days.

`

The next the bell rang in the shop, the blond was not at the front desk. “Naruto?” Sasuke called, “I realize I’m early – where are you?”

“The RS!”

“Oh – but I’m not ‘allowed’ down there!” Sasuke snickered at the sign, “It’s ‘restricted’ remember?”

He heard Naruto snort a laugh – “Never stopped you before.”

“True, that.” He ducked under the sign and continued down into the basement of the store.

The familiar rows of shelves full of colorfully labeled dvds and films, a few empty boxes, some open, some folded shut and tucked against the wall. Third row over and dark eyes surveyed his lover’s backside.

This too was a familiar scene, the blond’s back to him as he fitted the films onto the shelf for storage between Jiraiya’s viewing and the store’s rental shelves.

However this time, he had no hesitation about stepping up behind the blond, his arms wrapping surely around the other’s waist, leaning forward to nuzzle against his neck, breathing in the sweet smell of sun and brightness.

“Sasuke!” Naruto started, a smile in his voice, “I’m still working, you know!”

“You can take a small break though can’t you?” Sasuke wondered fingers slipping under the edge of his lover’s shirt. His fingers turned golden with happiness against the bronze skin.

Naruto sighed, and his hands fell to cover Sasuke’s as he stood back up, back resting to Sasuke’s chest, “Well since Jiraiya’s out picking up a new shipment… I guess I can take a short break.”

“Glad to hear it.” Sasuke grinned pressing his lips to the blond’s neck. The warm and comforting presence of the other made him so at ease.

“Why are you so early anyway?” Naruto wondered, fingers stroking over pale hands around him.

Sasuke breathed against his neck, he didn’t even remember why he’d rushed here so quickly – it must not have been too important if he forgot this quickly. “I must have just missed you.”

Naruto snorted, “We live together.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t miss you.” Sasuke stated petulantly, pressing a kiss to Naruto’s neck again. Naruto’s breath hitched as pale lips teased the skin below his ear.

Lips moved across his vein, and Naruto sighed at the feathery feel of the other’s mouth caressing his skin. His tongue dawdling slightly over the skin, flickered out to taste and mark.

Sasuke’s hands moved under his shirt, and Naruto’s hands followed his as a pale hand snaked upwards to his chest. The other limb’s fingers delved slightly past the line of the blond’s pants.

Naruto started, and arched back against Sasuke’s chest, twisting his body away from the offending appendage, turning towards the dark-haired youth. Sasuke’s grip loosened to allow the motion, catching blue eyes as the blond turned to face him.

Then soft lips devoured his, limbs twisting and twining against each other. Their hips met and with a cry from each fires lit. The rough of hands gripped tighter, pulled closer.

The pits of his stomach began to bubble and broil, a burning heat spreading through every vein, as skin rubbed up against skin. Lips met lips, and tongue twisted against tongue.

“Now here’s a good reason for restriction,” Sasuke smirked against Naruto’s throat his tongue scorching across the blond’s collar.

Naruto laughed despite himself, his body shaking between arousal and momentary amusement. “Yeah. Live porn.”

The blond moaned as their bodies pressed closer, and his hands stroked into dark hair, fingers pressing along the scalp. It felt good. There wasn’t anything wrong with it, but something odd and unsettling placed a lead bullet in his brain.

“Were you originally attracted to men?”

And it was boring a disturbingly dark hole in his head.

“Are you attracted to men now? Or just Sasuke?”

No. He already knew – it was just Sasuke. But there was nothing unnatural to him when this flat chest was pressed to his own, or when his strong lithe arms wrapped around him.

There was nothing terribly disturbing to him now when Sasuke’s hardening shaft ground into his own. And he moaned, but that bullet was boring deeper. “Perhaps it’s too late for you – you’ve already been manipulated.”

No. This… had been his choice. He trusted Sasuke, and he felt safe with him. He grimaced and his throat felt sick.

He couldn’t even concentrate on the warm satisfying winding as Sasuke’s hand cupped his erection, lips and teeth assaulting his neck and shoulder.

He didn’t want to be thinking about anything else but this – Sasuke, and now – but the bullet wouldn’t drop out of his skull. It stayed and it ground against his skull scraping and echoing doubt.

He felt safe with Sasuke. But he wasn’t calm, the hurried aroused thumping he normally felt like this was cold and hurried – anxious. His arms gripped around the paler youth but they were spoiled by tremors, he hoped the other wouldn’t notice.

Tsunade was also safe. She’d never ever hurt him in any way. Sakura was safe, Sakura hurt him before, but never because she’d meant to - neither had Sasuke. Naruto had hurt him.

But Sasuke forgave him, this was fine. Sasuke was safe. Sasuke was safe. Sakura was safe. Sakura…

He loved her, not the same as Sasuke, but she calmed him so much. Blue eyes slid shut, and her slender warm hands cupped his face, her pretty angelic face smiled at him, and he relaxed against Sasuke. His fingers circling again in dark strands.

Her mouth smiling pleasantly, green eyes kind and calm. His body relaxed, and when Sasuke’s lips touched his own he sighed against it and moved his hips against him slower.

Sasuke’s hand replaced hers, and his was real, not hers. But that was okay, she didn’t need to be there. He wasn’t going to think about it anymore – he was calm now. This was fine. This was Sasuke.

Thanks, “Sakura.”

Sasuke started at the whisper, he probably wasn’t meant to hear it, the acknowledgement barely a breath from the blond’s lips. But that didn’t prevent the name from jarring him horribly and making his skin crawl.

He thought the blond was ‘over’ her, at least in the sense that when making out with him he wouldn’t be randomly saying ‘her’ name!

Sasuke’s jaw tensed and his fingers unconsciously dug deeper into the blond’s skin, his mouth moved to cover the blond’s. Naruto wanted him, right? Naruto even threw away that box – he didn’t need to be thinking about that girl.

He felt Naruto whimper into his mouth, and his tongue twined around Naruto’s lips pressing him insistent and demanding. He’d make him forget about her – he’d make his mind completely blank.

Naruto’s hands tightened in his hair and began to pull. Sasuke hissed and pulled away, “What?!” he barked, his voice angrier than he’d intended for it to be. It sounded like he was furious – and he was, but he didn’t mean to shout!

“That hurts – jerk!” Naruto frowned, squirming against Sasuke’s grip, hands gripping tightly past the skin and sinew to scrape nail to bone.

Sasuke scowled and released him stepping back. His member was still pulsing slightly, but it had effectively been killed several moments ago when he realized his lover’s mind was somewhere else.

“What’s wrong with you?” Naruto wondered in some agitation.

Sasuke sighed, breathing out the anger, attempting to be calm. He may as well explain himself, communication was best in this sort of situation, right? “You said ‘her’ name.” he growled.

“What?” Naruto started. He cursed and grimaced, he hadn’t thought he’d said her name aloud! Sure he’d been thinking about her – but only to make what that jerk said earlier go away!

“You said Sakura’s name!” Sasuke told him, “I think I’m in the right to be a little upset about that.”

“No need to start digging your claws into me though.” Naruto frowned, “I mean I was thinking about her – but, I was just feeling anxious. I only thought about her to calm down.”

“We’re making out and you need to calm down?” Sasuke felt a muscle twitch and he felt like screaming, or laughing, or both.

“I said I was anxious.” Naruto scowled.

“And we were making out? Why were you anxious?” Sasuke asked, “Was I doing something wrong? If I do anything that bothers you, you know you can just tell me?”

“No it wasn’t you,” Naruto sighed, “just this jerk said some things, and it’s stupid, but anyway it made me anxious.”

“Right. We’re making out and you get anxious.” Sasuke calmed his voice, but inside he felt like lashing out at something. “So you think about a ‘girl’ to get your mind off it and say her name. Because I’m not enough to keep you distracted? What?”

“Yeah pretty much.” Naruto frowned. Of course Sasuke couldn’t keep him distracted! Sasuke was the source of the anxiety indirectly related to that jerk’s comments from earlier.

Comments which were scarily accurate although he really tried to doubt the truth it implied. But if Sasuke was acting like this…?

“I see.” Sasuke fumed, his voice twisting out as something cold and violent as he turned to head back upstairs. Maybe today just wasn’t a good day.

“But not entirely!” Naruto called after him, realizing how that last part must have come out sounding, “Hey wait! There’s a whole story to this that happened hours before you got here!”

Oh a ‘story’! Great!

“I don’t want to hear it.” Sasuke told him, not stopping, he reached the stairs. “I’ll see you later, we’ll talk then or whatever.”

“Sasuke!” Naruto shouted after him, but the paler youth was already upstairs and within seconds he heard the shop door open and close – and his lover was gone.
Naruto cursed and whacked his hand against the shelf cursing again at the sting.

He’d tried to be completely honest, and somehow it had come out insulting and half-the story. But the story was probably fairly confusing. Maybe if he’d just said he saw his brother everything would be fine?

Naruto sighed and turned back to his cataloging. He’d finally gotten it out of his head too and was all set to continue when ‘that’ had to happen. Maybe today just wasn’t a good day. What a pain.

Sasuke slammed the shop door shut behind him when he left. Still fuming angrily as he stalked down the street in quick hurried strides. This was ridiculous! It didn’t make any sense!!

Maybe he’d stormed out prematurely, he considered as he calmed down, maybe there were other things going on that Naruto would have to tell him first before he understood – because as it was the pieces didn’t fit.

Making out, Naruto got anxious, needed to be calm, but Sasuke wasn’t enough so he thought of Sakura…

Nope, didn’t fit. There wasn’t a reason, at least not one that Sasuke could stomach – unless Naruto’s body was finally trying to reject the fact that the blond wasn’t actually gay? He’d told him that before too but… Sasuke loved him.

Naruto loved him too, right? So that shouldn’t even be an issue. So what was Naruto was going to tell him? But he left. He cursed at himself. He’d done it again – he’d been an idiot.

He’d probably hurt the blond too – he wondered if his hands had left marks because of that now. But he was hurt too… though it was likely his own fault for not staying calm and getting an explanation.

Shit. Idiot.

`

“What?”

“I want a cheeeburger.” Sasuke frowned at the bodacious woman.

“I got that. Why do you look like you rolled off a moving train?” Tsunade wondered, “And sitting all the way over here?”

The opposite end of the diner to where he usually sat with his friends.

“None of those guys are here now. I can sit where I want.” Sasuke looked away. Truthfully he picked this spot since it was pretty far from the main of the open diner area which meant he wouldn’t be bothered by people coming and going as much.

“I see.” Tsunade decided not to question him further. “I’ll bring you some water too, looks like you’ll want it.”

Sasuke didn’t even respond and laid his head down on his arms. This was stupid… but he’d clear it up whenever he saw Naruto next, given that the blond wasn’t angry with him now for being a pig-headed jerk.

Really stupid, and he’d felt to embarrassed to go back to the shop to try and apologize right then too so nothing was resolved yet. Hopefully Naruto wouldn’t be too mad, Sasuke’d managed to cool off, maybe the blond would too.

Tsunade grinned as her favorite brat walked in and sat down at the bar area upon noticing that the regular group wasn’t taking up their usual booth.

She walked over to him, if he wanted to know where Sasuke was, he had only to walk to the other side of the bar area.

“Tsunade,” Naruto greeted with a smile.

“Hey brat, you doing allright? Been a while.” Tsunade was about to start with ‘if you’re looking for Sasuke-‘ but the tired look on the blond’s face made her ask something different first. “What happened to you?”

Come to think of it Sasuke had looked a bit upset too. She already knew – they were fighting already! That idiot Sasuke!! What had he done now!

The woman knew it had to be his fault! Naruto hardly ever did anything wrong! At least most of the time! Which mean liklihood was higher that Sasuke was the cause of this!

“Nothing.” Naruto shook his head.

“Come on, you can tell me. Something to do with Sasuke?” she wondered, “What did he do now?”

“No, I uh-” Naruto’s face screwed up in a grimace, “I kind of said Sakura’s name while we were making out.”

Tsunade erased her previous assumption. “That was a pretty shitty thing to do. He heard you I imagine.”

“Yeah. He got pretty upset,” Naruto nodded, “Which is understandable, but it’s like this – I’m not normally anxious when we do stuff; really I’m not.”

Tsunade frowned – so far this didn’t make much sense.

“But this time, because his brother said some things, and I was thinking about it and it made me anxious and because it was about Sasuke I couldn’t exactly concentrate on what we were doing you know?”

“So I thought about her and it calmed me down but I guess her name slipped out somehow.” Tsunade stared. “I agree, it was pretty shitty of me. But he wouldn’t even hear me out!”

Nevermind – this was totally Naruto’s fault. Or slightly more Naruto’s fault. “I mean his fingers started digging in and it kind of affected his kissing when he got angry…”

Too much information Naruto!! Wait – what?! “He hurt you?”

“Not too much.” Naruto shrugged. His hips still had his fingermarks though, but they’d probably be gone in a few hours. Probably.

That bastard!! Tsunade fumed angrily. “Are you okay though?!”

“Yeah.” Naruto cocked his head to the side, was she jumping to conclusions or something? “I’m fine really. There’s no real damage. It wasn’t anything! He didn’t ‘hurt’ me.”

Geez – what was she thinking? Sasuke didn’t hit him or anything.

“He just got rough.”

“In the tiniest most fractional fraction of the tiniest bit… maybe.” Naruto emphasized. Fingerprints were nothing – honestly.

“Right, that’s good then.” Tsunade sighed, “So did you want anything?”

“Water please, and maybe a ham sandwich.” Naruto nodded. Tsunade wrote it down and turned back to the other side of the bar, handing the boy’s orders to Shizune to get ready.

“Shizu’s getting your food.” Tsunade told him setting a glass of water in front of Sasuke. He only nodded and sipped the cold liquid.

“So seriously, what happened? You don’t look too great.” She mused, “Something with Naruto? Or Sakura?”

Sasuke nearly choked on the water. “Your intuition is surprisingly good today.” He noted with a bit of suspicion.

“Oh so I’m right? Well spill, punk.” The woman demanded leaning on the counter. She really was interested, how did Sasuke see this?

“I really don’t think you want to know.”

“No I do.”

“We were making out.”

Tsunade paused, and Sasuke gauged her reaction. Normally she didn’t’ care to discuss anything like that. “Good start. Doesn’t explain why you look upset. Continue.”

Sasuke frowned, “He kind of said Sakura’s name… in the middle of it.” Sasuke said slowly.

“And? How did you react?”

“I got a little angry.”

“You hurt him?”

Sasuke flinched, “Not bad I think… mostly I just yelled at him I think…” there were where his fingers dug in and left a mark… but she didn’t need to know that much right? “That’s justifiable though…”

Tsunade clucked her tongue in something like dissatisfaction. “Did he explain himself?”

Sasuke shifted uncomfortably. Since when did he talk to Tsunade about his problems? Really? “I kind of stormed out before he could. I was too upset, I acted irrationally.”

Would she leave him alone now?

“Well I think it’ll be fine. Just talk to him when you next see him. Let him explain himself – I’m sure he has a reason.” Tsunade sighed as she turned to Shizune and took the cheeseburger for Sasuke.

Then sent her employee to the other side with the ham sandwich and water. Sasuke nodded in agreement, even though he couldn’t think of a single reason… not one that he could be happy with…

Tsunade left him and wandered over to her surrogate son, and pulled up a stool to sit. “Well I think it’ll be fine. He should be cooled off next you see him, so you can sort things out and explain yourself. It’ll be fine.”

With that she gave herself a pat on the back for helping patch things up without really doing anything.

Naruto made a ‘hm’ing sound in agreement. “It’s a little embarrassing that I said her name. I didn’t mean to say it aloud – but I’m not embarrassed that I thought it.”

Tsunade looked up again.

“I really can’t take it when it’s him doing that.” Naruto mumbled to himself. “At least sometimes… and especially then.”

“Are you really not okay with it?” the woman wondered.

“No I-!” Naruto stopped himself. Yes he enjoyed it, and yes he was mostly okay with it but… he knew how Sasuke felt. He thought he felt the same, at least a little. But was a little enough?

“I’m still not entirely sure.” Naruto gave a short mirthless laugh, “I know I like him but,” he paused searching for the words, “this is still… really new.”

`

Sasuke paid Shizune given that Tsunade wasn’t back yet, and he headed back out into the world. He could understand where Naruto would think about Sakura if ‘this’ relationship of theirs still bothered him on some basic level.

Which was why he’d wait to talk to him later this day, to give the blond time to sort it out. He did love him, and it wasn’t as if he expected Naruto to just forget about her after so many years.

Which was why this was fine. Tsuande was probably right, the blond had an explanation – in fact the pieces were probably glaring him in the face he was just being foolish and not noticing.

Maybe the blond had given him all the necessary information and he just had selective hearing and had to have it all spelled out for him or something.

“Oh my, you don’t look well at all.”

Sasuke tensed and turned stiffly to face the speaker. He already knew who it was and it made his whole relaxed persona shift into something cautious and tense. He hated him – he hated this guy so very much, now and ever!

Itachi looked back at his brother serenely. “Are things not working out between you and that little golden-haired thing? Already?”

Sasuke growled, “You! You’re why he was-!!” he cut himself off. The sparkle of interest in his brother’s eyes disturbing him too much to satisfy the other’s desire to hear of the dispute he caused.

“You talked to him didn’t you?” Sasuke hissed, “What lies did you tell him? What did you say to him?!”

“Lie?” Itachi cocked his head as if puzzled, “Why would I lie? Why would I do that? Why would I ruin my precious little brother’s happiness? I only want you to be happy brother. I want you to be realistic?”

“Yeah I’ve had it with you!” Sasuke snarled. The honest look of surprise and hurt on his brother’s face not stirring him for an instant. “And drop the act. You don’t need it with me.”

“True I suppose.” Itachi agreed his expression falling into placid disinterest, “Although it seems there was no violence involved.”

“My, my and what happened to you?” Itachi shook his head, a strange demented smile snaking it’s way onto his face, “Wouldn’t you normally strike those girls who cried out my name instead of yours?”

“Shut up.” Sasuke hissed. Truth – but no longer. Not anymore. Sasuke didn’t hit him – he’d never strike Naruto. Not again – he’d done it once, and it had done nothing to alleviate the pain he’d felt then. Nothing.

Itachi grinned at the tremor of his brother’s arm. Sasuke willed his body to calm, and his heart to slow to pace itself – he was too rigid, too disturbed. He couldn’t let the other under his skin like this!

Gaara was right, he knew exactly what he wanted. He knew what he wanted all those times he thought he saw his brother’s shadow somewhere and never saw him, he’d met so many who knew his brother when he did not.

It’s how he still knew him – not his brother, but this man, this Itachi. This sick twisted sludge of fleshly human scum. This viper that would weasel itself to his side, and demean him, and target those closest to him.

Because Itachi ‘could’? Because Sasuke’s misery made Itachi happy?

“Don’t be so grim!” Itachi laughed suddenly, “I’m just playing with you, little brother! Nothing serious!”

Why was he here? Why now, of all the times, was he showing him his face? Why, when he’d kept to the shadows for so long? Why when after so many years he finally seemed to disappear completely from his life?

Why now? Why was he here?

“You’re too tense! You shouldn’t take life so seriously little brother,” Itachi told him quietly, venomously, “You’ll never get out of it alive anyway.”

Sasuke refused to reply. Instead he turned and walked away, lost in the crowd, his brother far behind, but breathing right down the back of his neck.

I know what you’re doing, Itachi….

Sasuke’s feet padded along the sidewalk and he glared straight ahead.

… and I won’t let you get away with it.

---

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