My WHore

Disclaimer: Okay, once again, I must say that Naruto and all other associated characters do not belong to me. The proof of this is that Naruto and Sasuke actually manage to get stuff done. Were I calling the shots they would be too busy having hot steamy monkey sex to go on any missions.



Pyrus: You’re starting a new chapter… you must have been in the shower just now.

Pucky: SHUT UP!!! Don’t make fun of my creative process.

Orishi: Well, it’s weird…

Pucky: SHUT UP OSHI-CHAN!!! I thought of you two in the shower, so NYAAA

Pyrus: No you didn’t, you thought of me while you were doodling in Calculus class when you should have been learning about limits.

Orishi: YEAH!!! And you thought of me one night after reading like 15 different dirty Naruto fanfictions and you had a hot dream about a story idea.

Pucky: The dream wasn’t hot… it was just about a character… and I know I came up with some character in my shower…

Oshi and Py: KASEY!!!!!

Kasey: No… I was the product of a funny idea of his when he was sitting on the side of the highway getting a speeding ticket.

Pucky: WHATEVER!!! Maybe I don’t come up with characters in the shower, just plot lines. ANYWAYS ON WITH THE SHOW!!!!!

Cairn: *Bounces in* YAY!!!! SHOW TIME!!!

Pyrus: GOD!!! hide the chocolate…

Pucky: -_- it’s bad when the figments of my own imagination don’t listen to me. *starts fic*



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Sasuke sat coolly in his seat at the back of the classroom. He was wearing his mask of emotionless detachment to hide the fact that he couldn’t stop staring at the dobe in the front row. He hated that blonde, but he knew that wasn’t true. That idiot was the symbol of his one weakness, and he wanted to know why. He was a perfect example of what an Uchiha was supposed to be, except he couldn’t stop the lust filled thoughts that raced through his mind about that one, delicious, fuckable blonde.



Naruto sat talking cheerily with his friends as he waited for the class to start. He thanked god that none of them knew what he did to stay in school. He simply told them that he had scholarships to attend the prestigious Kage College, one of the best known and most expensive colleges in the country. The scholarships line wasn’t a lie, he did have a few, but not nearly enough to keep himself in school, thus he was forced to find ‘other’ means of support. That is why four nights out of the week, he found himself, back on the stained sheets taking some random guy’s dick while being called those dirty names. He didn’t let it get to him though. He always wore his cheery façade even if it was just his own mask.

“OI hey Naruto, we’re all going out for a movie tonight, wanna come?” his shaggy haired friend Kiba called over from one row back. “It’s gonna be a good one.”

Naruto turned back to look at Kiba and noticed the obsidian eyes fixed onto him from further back. “No, sorry, I can’t come, I have to work tonight.”

“Ugh, work? What a pain. It’s a Friday night, you should be out living. I know, how about we come see ya at work?”

“NO, I mean, no, it’s okay, I’m not really allowed to have visitors.”

“OI… well, when are we going to hang out?”

“Uhmmm, I should be off Sunday.” the whiskered boy replied.

“Fine then, Sunday night, you, me, and all the guys, we’re going out to play paintball. Agreed?”

“Troublesome” the lazy kid next to Kiba with his ponytailed head down on his arms said.

Naruto chuckled “We all know that means yes Shikamaru, and sure, I think I can do that. But it can’t be too late, I have to prep for my lab on Monday.”

“This shall be a most YOUTHFUL weekend indeed.” came the cry from one Rock Lee who was sporting his usual bushy brows, green spandex, and bowl cut. “YOSH”

Kiba nodded “Then it’s agreed. And Naruto, haven’t you ever heard of the saying ‘All work and no play…’?”

Naruto shrugged “Ya gotta do what ya gotta do.”

Kiba shrugged “Well, I’m not letting you out of Sunday, even if I have to march into your work and drag you out.”

Naruto gulped imperceptibly. “Uhh, okay, I promise.” Naruto shifted feeling the gaze of the raven still upon him. He would never admit it to anyone, but he had a thing for the dark and moody Uchiha. That was simply another reason to keep his job a secret. He doubted that the ultra elite son of perfection would ever think about a hooker in a way that Naruto hoped for. But Naruto refused to be like the slobbering fangirls that hounded him constantly though.



Sasuke had been so engrossed in watching his blonde ‘Wait… where did that his come from?’ that he didn’t notice the pink haired girl approaching like a tiger stalking his prey. “SASUKE-KUN!!! “ Sakura cried as she got close and latched onto his arm.

Sasuke let a minute scowl mar his face “What is it Sakura?”

“Well, would you like to go on a date with me?”

“No.”

Sakura frowned “Ah, you must have so much homework. That is what I like about you, so diligent in your grades. Well, perhaps some other time then. Bye Sasuke-kun.”

Sasuke shrugged and went back to dobe gazing.

Just then, the eternally late Kakashi decided to make his appearance and begin lecturing on the finer points of the Punic Wars.



Late at night, after a grueling day in classes one pissy and horny raven prowled around his apartment. He was torn. On one hand, he was an Uchiha and Uchihas never paid for sex. On the other hand, he did not want to get entangled with someone which would involve emotions.

Sasuke sighed and picked up the card from his dresser. He quickly left his apartment and headed to the Red Light district of Konoha. He walked down the street trying his best to avoid touching anything. On every corner he could see the signs of depravity. Women walked in clothes that had obvious intentions. Many tried to gain his attention but he would spare them no mind. He wouldn’t tell them, but the reason he took interest in Orochimaru’s establishment was because the card advertised a specialty in male delicacies.

Sasuke approached the run down building and sneered. ‘It seems impossible that anything worthwhile could be in this building, but perhaps they have a blonde.’ Sasuke smirked as he walked into the front door.

“Ah, Uchiha-san.” Orochimaru purred with a slight hiss, “So glad you could come to see us. How may we cater to your fantasies tonight?”

“Blonde. Blue eyes if possible.”

“Ahhh, perhaps we have the perfect thing, but he isn’t cheap.”

“Whatever, just give him to me, and keep my name out of it.”

“Ahhh, yes, discretion is a cornerstone of our business. You need not worry. Kabuto, go inform our dear blonde kitsune that he has another client before he can go home.”

“Yes sir.” The silver haired man in the glasses replied before walking down the hall and up the stairs.



Naruto laid back fighting his tears as he stared at the ceiling. He didn’t’ want to be there, it had been a hard night. He’d had three clients in two hours and two of them had been at the same time. His only comfort was that he only had another hour before he could go, barring an extra client. A knock came at his door and Kabuto let himself in.

“You have another client, and you can’t let someone else take him. He requested a blonde specifically, with blue eyes.” Naruto gulped but nodded as he took a deep breath to steady himself. Kabuto turned and left the room to notify the client that his fantasy was ready.



Naruto looked up as the door began to open and the client walked in before he saw the man.



“YOU!?!?” Both men shouted as their gazes met.



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Muahahaha I have put up the new chapter. Now, I just want you all to know, that just because I have put this chapter up quickly, I can not promise this same speed with every chapter. In fact, I am not setting an update schedule because life is unpredictable, and I have other projects to work on. Most of them are just for a class, but still.



Pyrus: Stop bitching, your life isn’t that hard.

Pucky: Why aren’t you fucking Deri?

Pyrus: Heh heh, I kinda broke him.

Kasey: Must you talk about your boyfriends? I am miserably single over here.

Orishi: Well, he paired me up with Kiba at one point… I hope I get to be with him again!!!!

Cairn: WHERE IS THE CHOCOLATE!!!

Pyrus: YOU CAN”T HAVE ANY!!! You get too crazy with it.

Cairn: *pout* fine.