BREAK TO BREATHE
by Okami Rayne
Chapter Twenty One
The water felt like a splash of ice against his face – unlike the grim shower of blood that had struck him earlier.
Ugh…great start to the entry phase… Shikamaru blinked beads of icy water from his lashes, feeling cool droplets tracing along his neck to pool in the hollow of his throat, spilling a thin rivulet down along the lean contours of his chest. He shivered with a scowl.
Way too cold for this… Kneeling by the edge of the brook, he watched the water gush softly over the rocks. The pinkish tinge of blood had finally vanished and the water ran clear when he cupped it over his arms and face.
The blood hadn't been as bad as the rest of the crap he'd had to brush off his flak-jacket and tug out of his hair. Chunks of flesh and bone fragments, add to that all the other 'bird bits' that had seen Naruto flapping about dramatically further downstream.
Dammit. What kind of messed up attack was that? Shikamaru shook his head, cupping his hand back into the ribbon of running water, watching the gentle current wash across his skin. He'd waited for Hinata to finish before taking his turn to clean up; by the time he'd completed the bothersome task of dealing with his flak-jacket and clothes, the stars were already winking through.
Need to sleep... Shikamaru reached for his black top and whipped it against the air in a wet slap, dark eyes narrowing in irritation. He'd have to air it cold, as lighting a fire was out of the question. They didn't need any more reason to alert an enemy, although they'd doubled their watch.
If that's even gonna be effective against this enemy…how the hell did they see us coming…? The shadow-nin glanced skyward briefly, frowning at the moon before he dropped his gaze back to the brook, focusing on washing out his hair again. He tried to ignore the trickle of water as it chased along his spine. It was reminiscent of that chilling feeling he'd had back when the birds had fallen silent.
What the hell was'
that' about…? It had played out like a group deliberation. Coordinated like an illusion, only it wasn't…
Suddenly, another feeling prickled his skin.
Shikamaru froze as he leaned towards the brook.
He whipped his head around just as Hinata stepped into view, jolting to a stop on the spot. What happened next would have been hilarious if Shikamaru wasn't the one who'd provoked the ridiculous fluster Hinata jittered into.
One of the kunoichi's hands flew to her mouth, the other to her eyes. "I-I I'm sorry!"
Despite the deceptive light and the shield of her hands, it didn't take a genius to guess she'd turned that unique shade of red, which was about as trademark as Shikamaru's own expression when he arched his brow.
"Uh…" the shadow-nin glanced around, uncomfortably shifting his crouch, teetering forwards and back as if not sure what to do.
Awkward… It was only awkward because she was
making it awkward.
It's not like I'm completely…ugh…whatever… Choosing to just ignore said awkwardness, Shikamaru sighed and snagged a hand back through the thick strands of his hair, tipping his head to squeeze out the excess water before securing it back into its spiky ponytail.
"Making a habit of sneaking up on me," he teased, trying to ease some of her embarrassment. "Troublesome."
"I-I'm-sou-shi-ru-I-I-alk-tu-ou…" she stuttered from behind the mask of her hands, fingertips sealed across her face.
Shikamaru stared blankly for a moment. "Yeah, I really didn't catch a word of that."
Hinata cupped her flaming cheeks, averting her eyes. "I'm sorry…I wanted to talk to you."
"Right." Shikamaru folded a leg beneath him, rummaging inside his backpack. "What's up?"
Hinata remained hovering a short distance away but inched forward towards the stream, her eyes on the water, still mortified at her intrusion. "I…I've been thinking about…what you asked me to c-consider …"
Shikamaru cocked his head, tugging out a ration bar from his pack with one hand, squeezing out the sharp end of his ponytail with the other. "Right…?"
"I just…" Hinata hesitated, watching the water. "You asked me to think about what may have happened, at least t-two to three months ago with Neji-niisan…"
Shikamaru took a bite of the cereal bar and chewed quietly, swallowing the tough grain with a grimace before he cleared his throat. "Yeah?"
"Well I think…I think I know when it was that he started t-taking on more missions and avoiding home." Hinata nodded. "It was after his birthday."
Shikamaru stopped chewing, the bar poised at his lips. "His birthday?"
Hinata hummed, about to turn her head before she remembered how embarrassed she was feeling. "Y-yes…he t-turned eighteen in July. Two months ago."
Shikamaru narrowed his eyes, a speculative flicker playing in their depths. "Okay. Do you remember anything else about that day?"
Hinata raised a knuckle to her lip, brow furrowed in thought. "Not much…the elders wanted to speak to father. I think Neji may have been with them but I can't be sure."
Shikamaru watched her, his appetite forgotten as he shoved the remains of the bar away, moving to reach for his turtleneck top. "So a Main and Branch House family consult or something?"
"Well, I thought so but…" Hinata paused. "An ANBU representative was there."
What the hell? Shikamaru stopped dead in his tracks, his fingers curling just short of his clothing as he levelled his gaze on the kunoichi. "ANBU?"
"Yes, but…nothing seemed wrong…I mean, I didn't
sense anything was wrong…but it was after that, that Neji took up more solo missions…and s-stopped training with father as much. That's all I can think of."
Shikamaru slid his gaze away, his eyes darting with calculation.
The timing fits…that would have been shortly before that mission where he flipped…but there's no way that Tsunade-sama wouldn't have mentioned something like that…if Neji had involvement with ANBU then— "Shikamaru-kun?"
"Mn?" the shadow-nin hummed, distracted by his thoughts.
"Why did you…" Hinata frowned. "Why did you ask me about 4 AM?"
Shikamaru blinked, wringing out his black top before rising to his feet.
"I'm just curious," he shrugged. "I noticed Neji was usually up around that time."
Hinata nodded. "Oh, yes."
Shikamaru paused and turn more fully toward her, his eyes betraying his surprise. "Wait, you
knew that?"
Sensing his tone, Hinata turned a little, her eyes darting to his face. "I…well, yes. I mean…that's normal for Neji."
Shikamaru's mouth fell open a little. "Wait, what? Normal how?"
Hinata blinked, looking a little confused and uneasy. "Well, maybe not normal, but I just…he's always done that…it's when he meditates."
Shikamaru couldn't have stopped his snort even if he'd tried. "At
four in the damn morning?"
"I…" Hinata flinched, looking sheepish. "I used to get up earlier than that to train…when everyone was sleeping…it's quiet…I just…like Naruto-kun, Neji inspired me to work harder…train harder…"
Shikamaru sighed, slinging his damp top over his shoulder, ignoring Hinata's embarrassed fidgeting. "So he'd get up at 4 AM?"
"I…I don't know. I'd see him sometimes, but I only asked once…we never used to speak back then. He said he was meditating…conditioning his mind."
He's lying. Shikamaru frowned.
Neji does that meditation crap at around six in the morning, not four…it's kind of messed up that I know that…crazy Hyūgas and their crazy early-rising shit… "Shikamaru-kun?"
Shikamaru blinked, pulling himself from his mental cursing. "Why didn't you tell me this before?"
"I…I didn't think it was important…" Hinata looked ready to apologise. "I'm sor—"
"Don't. No need." Shikamaru shook his head, sighing. "I'm keeping you in the dark about a lot…sorry to be all cryptic. It's a drag…but it's gotta be that way."
"It's okay."
"No it's not, but at least you're not making things more troublesome for me." Shikamaru managed a smile. "I appreciate that."
"I know…" Hinata looped her fingers and smiled a little. "I need to get back on watch now."
"Yeah, I need to catch a nap."
Hinata made to walk away before she darted a glance at his face again. "Oh…Sakura-chan was asking where you were."
Shikamaru nodded, taking up his flak-jacket. "Thanks."
By the time he turned back, Hinata had already gone, leaving him with an uneasy feeling, but at least a few more pieces.
Why the 'hell' did I ever make this my problem…? Shikamaru sighed, brushed off the clinging jewels of water from his skin and made his way carefully over the mossy rocks, sneaking back towards one of the pitched tents.
He had a new plan now.
Sleep. Speak to Sakura. Strategise. Neji had set up a perimeter and had located an area where catacombs would be impossible given the density of rock beneath the ground's surface. Kiba and Akamaru were patrolling the canopies, leaving the ground beyond and within to Hinata's Byakugan eyes. Naruto had added clones to the watch and Lee sat like a squatting sentinel a short distance away from the tents, guarding the remaining supplies. He assumed Sakura and Chōji were resting.
We'll need to move again soon… Shikamaru draped his top and flak-jacket over a low-hanging bough. Turning toward the tent, he parted the canvas flap and slid inside, gritting his teeth against the chill.
"Crap
…" he muttered, crawling around until he located the bedroll, burrowing under the sheets with a hiss.
Just give me fifteen minutes… The tent flap rustled open, an unwelcome breeze drifting through.
"Ugh.
Why…" he groaned, tugging the sheets above his head.
"Sit up, Nara."
Shikamaru scowled beneath the sheets, his voice croaking out tiredly. "I swear, Hyūga…if you throw cold water on me again…I'm gonna murder you…"
He heard Neji snort, but the sound softened into what could have been a chuckle. This caused Shikamaru to pause. He felt his irritation ease a little and reluctantly lifted his head, the sharp end of his ponytail poking through the sheets before he craned his neck, just about cracking an eye open to glance over his shoulder at the Jōnin.
"Sit up," Neji said again.
Shikamaru had to squint to make out the other ninja, but when his eyes adjusted to the gloom he noticed Neji was holding something.
"Even if it's cold, please tell me that's coffee."
"Not quite."
"Not interested," Shikamaru muttered, burrowing back under the sheets. "Night."
He heard Neji set the cup down to the side. "How long do you need?"
"Longer than we've probably got," Shikamaru muttered, but he kept his tone lazy and light, rolling onto his back slowly.
He felt Neji's gaze tracking him.
"We'll need to move within the next hour or so…at a push, a half-hour to spare," Neji said. "We cannot remain stationary like this, even with our guard doubled."
"What a drag…" Shikamaru sighed, rubbing at his eyes. "Then give me fifteen crappy minutes."
"I'll give you twenty."
Shikamaru glanced up from under his hand, arching a brow as he traced his hooded gaze over Neji's face; the elegant contours looked shadowed, if not a little gaunt.
Shikamaru frowned, lowering his hand. "You slept at all?"
Neji offered a faint quirk at his lips, almost unperceivable, but Shikamaru knew what to look for without even realising it.
"You should. We need you alert, Hyūga."
"I'll be fine." Neji glanced towards the tent flap. "Besides, one of us needs to oversee things."
Shikamaru followed his gaze. "Wanna have a little more faith in the others? They don't need a babysitter."
He almost chuckled at the look Neji shot him, but he kept his own gaze shuttered and amused, inviting the Jōnin to share the humour rather than take offense. Neji must have been too tired to be troublesome, but still too proud to be compliant, because he settled half-way with an eye roll – not surrendering a laugh just yet.
Shikamaru convinced himself he wasn't disappointed.
Besides, there were more pressing things to be concerned about; not to mention figuring out a way to phrase a few choice questions. Questions that might just obliterate the Hyūga's sense of humour all together.
Great… Yawning loudly, Shikamaru rolled onto his side, his half-lidded gaze tracing Neji as the Jōnin shifted away to lay on the opposite bedroll. The Hyūga settled rigidly atop the sheets, draping one arm across his stomach with fingers curled into a loose fist.
Try as he might, Shikamaru couldn't stop the words from slipping out. "Relax, Neji."
Neji glanced across without turning his head, humming. "If we survive the night, I'll be sure to attempt that."
Shikamaru arched a brow, his mouth hidden behind the sheets, face only visible from the bridge of his nose upwards. "No one's gonna die. Relax."
"Two Byakugan users were blindsided, Shikamaru. Do not ask me to relax."
"No one is going to die. Like I've told you before…that's not an option."
The lack of response drew a sharp edge of tension through the air. Shikamaru immediately moved to soften it, not wanting to put in twice the effort later to make things less turbulent, despite the fact that he'd soon be rocking the boat with all the questions swirling around in his head.
"Besides," Shikamaru let the word drag out on a yawn. "You don't lose, remember?"
Neji smirked. "I lost at Shogi."
Shikamaru's chuckle puffed against the sheets, forcing him to nudge them away from his mouth with his nose. "Yeah, several times…you're pretty crap."
To Shikamaru's surprise, the Hyūga's lips tightened, but not with irritation – judging by the lift at Neji's cheekbones, the stubborn bastard was fighting a smile.
"At some point, Shikamaru…" Neji turned his head, glancing across. "I will beat you."
Shikamaru arched both his brows, maintaining his drowsy gaze. "You sound pretty sure."
"I'm certain. As of this moment I'll make it a goal."
The minute the Hyūga dropped those words, Shikamaru saw an opening. He took it.
"Oh yeah? Looks like Lee was right when he said you were destined for greatness."
He watched Neji's expression shift, the amused glint in the Hyūga's eyes turning a little dimmer. "Lee said that?"
Here we go… Shikamaru shrugged. "Yeah, I was surprised."
The shadow-nin expected Neji to fall into a tense, brooding silence, but it seemed the Hyūga was on a roll with surprising him.
"I suppose it's to be expected," Neji said quietly, his melodic tones falling to the side of contemplative. "He believes that whatever you work hard at determines the outcome…I suppose you could call that a self-defined destiny…"
"No one can deny that you work hard."
"I wish I could say the same for you," Neji returned with a snort.
"You're just full of cheap shots, aren't you?"
Neji closed his eyes. "Then stop talking about destiny…"
"Lee's words, not mine." Shikamaru rolled onto his back, tugging the sheets up over his mouth and nose again, keeping as much of his face as warm as possible without completely vanishing under the covers. "So does it stop at Jōnin for you?"
"Excuse me?"
"Your progress or whatever…apparently you've got some final goal."
He heard Neji shift and turned his head, watching the Hyūga prop himself up slightly, using his black-and-tan bag as a makeshift pillow.
"And I suppose Lee told you this." Neji's lips twitched, betraying a hint of a smile.
"He said Jōnin wasn't your final goal…had me wondering if you'd shoot for something crazy like ANBU." He drawled the words lazily, rolling them out like dice across a board, waiting for the outcome.
Playing this game with Neji, he stood to lose more than he could hope to gain if using the ANBU card turned out to be a disaster. Just when he thought Neji wasn't going to deign him with a response, the Hyūga cleared his throat, his voice falling quietly.
"Would it matter if I were to do that?"
Shikamaru tipped his head back, already planning the course he hoped the conversation would take. "Yeah, it's not exactly the best career route if you can avoid it."
"Too much effort for you, Nara?"
"I'd start losing more sleep than I'm comfortable with…and for reasons I don't really wanna think about."
"I thought you didn't waste your time with guilt," Neji said. "The zone that ANBU operate in is just a deeper level of the world any shinobi operates in."
"Yeah, but would you seriously wanna operate in
that zone?"
"Why wouldn't I?" Neji growled.
As the Hyūga's tone hardened, Shikamaru carefully manoeuvred his words into position, aiming to pursue the thread of insightful direction the conversation was heading in.
"There's a difference between killing in battle and killing in cold blood."
"Tch. Grow up, Nara."
"Wake up, Hyūga."
"I
have woken up," Neji snapped, an abrupt and sharp twist of his head causing Shikamaru to freeze. "I woke up to the reality a long time ago. I can entertain a far-fetched dream like Naruto, or I can get real and work with what I have. That is what I'm doing."
Shikamaru had a wealth of responses to
that, mostly concerning what Neji was doing to his health, but he slammed a lid on any sarcasm and opted for the safer route. He propped himself up on an elbow, his dark eyes gaining an edge of intensity as they lifted from their lazy shutter, slicing across to meet with Neji's glare.
"By putting yourself into the damned Black Ops?"
"If that is what I have to do, then so be it."
"Why the hell would you
have to do that, Neji?"
Neji flicked his gaze away, a tired, irritated sigh rasping from between his teeth before he drew a slow, controlled breath, shaking his head. "Go to sleep, Nara."
Screw playing this safe. Shikamaru stepped over subtly with his next words.
"Unless ANBU have already recruited you…"
Neji stiffened at that, his pale eyes widening a little before his face calcified into a mask too stony to read and too hard to yield under the pressure of further probing. Shikamaru sensed he'd lost the opportunity to glean anything further off the other ninja.
If ANBU recruited Neji...why the HELL didn't the Hokage mention that? Shikamaru let his elbow slide and flopped onto his back again, tugging the sheet back up to his throat with a yawn, pretending to slip into nonchalance again.
"Whatever…I guess if it's in the cards, it'll just happen, right?"
Neji eased off his glacial glare, frowning slightly instead. "Are you deliberately trying to irritate me by speaking like that?"
Sensing it was time to steer them onto safer ground again, Shikamaru let a hint of amusement play behind his words. "Hey, Lee's the one who mentioned destiny. I don't give a crap about stuff like that."
"Lee seems to feel the need to give that word a better meaning when he's around me." Neji frowned. "I don't know why he bothers."
"Makes sense." Shikamaru let his eyes flutter shut. "He's probably trying to ease the tension. And let's face it, you need to relax."
Neji barked a short, sharp laugh that came out too harsh to be amused. "Wonderful. He wants me to be his rival – and you want me to relax."
Shikamaru frowned at that, cracking an eye open. "You know, sometimes when people are around you, it's just for the sake of being around you…they don't
want anything from you."
"I don't completely understand the point of that."
Shikamaru rolled his eyes and turned his head to respond.
He cut himself short when his gaze settled on Neji's face.
The Hyūga's brow had furrowed into a knot resembling an almost childlike confusion. He looked as if he were in the middle of solving an equation that had no place being in his mental catalogue. More than that, he looked troubled by it, and not in the way that was causing him frustration – in fact, those pale eyes seemed oddly lost, distant.
Like when his guard was down without him realising it.
Shikamaru's gaze softened a little, a twinge of something uneasy tightening in his chest. He steeled himself with a snort, shaking his head against his own reaction.
It's not personal. "So don't try to understand it. Just accept it." Shikamaru rolled over, needing to end the conversation. "Night."
"I don't think that I can accept it."
"Then tolerate it. Go to sleep."
"I don't know how," Neji's voice fell quietly.
"Close your eyes and shut up for starters."
"That isn't what I meant, idiot."
Again, a hint of something deeper played behind Neji's voice – that pained confusion. Shikamaru tensed up, wishing it was the cold. His unexplainable urge to reach out and respond to Neji fired off all sorts of panic in his system, leaving him scrambling for a way to avoid the situation.
Shit… Too tired to think strategically, he fell back on the sure-fire method of provoking the other ninja onto standoffish territory. Shikamaru heaved a growling sigh.
"Are you getting stupider, Hyūga, or is it just me?"
Neji's tone hardened instantly. "Do you want another concussion?"
Shikamaru resisted the urge to smother himself, snorting at his own stupidity; maintaining equilibrium was impossible. He needed Neji to be guarded with him to create distance, yet also needed to bridge that distance if he was going to make breakthrough with the stubborn bastard.
Shit. I'm fucking this up…I can't fuck this up… As if burying his head under the threadbare sheets would make the situation less troublesome or
real, Shikamaru did just that, snorting beneath the cocoon of thin fabric.
"
Both of us being brain-dead won't help," he muttered, hearing Neji shift from across the tent.
"Abandoning your 'two geniuses being stupid together' strategy?" Neji uttered beneath his breath. "The smartest thing you've done yet, Nara."
Shikamaru snorted. "File a fucking complaint or shut up. I'm trying to sleep."
A solid crack of Neji's heel into the small of his back had him jerking around with a growl, his elbow jarring against the bedroll. "What the hell, Hyūga!"
Neji arched a brow, his lip curling in a smirk. "Consider my complaint formally filed, Nara. Your twenty minutes are up."
Oh fuck that. Shikamaru scowled, waiting until Neji had turned on his heel before he shifted his elbow and jabbed it hard into the crook of the Hyūga's knee, causing it to buckle.
"Watch your step," the Nara drawled.
Neji just about caught his balance, saving himself an ungraceful stagger out of the tent. He wheeled back around with a murderous flash in his pale eyes. Shikamaru simply shrugged, unable to keep his mouth from curving. However, he dropped his smug expression when a sly smirk slowly laced across Neji's lips.
Shit. Shikamaru's eyes widened as the Hyūga's fingers settled on the sheets.
"Oh don't you fucking dare, Hyūga."
In the split second it took for their eyes to meet again, both reacted at the same time. Two sets of fingers gnarled into the sheets, jerking in opposite directions until the angry rip of fabric tore through the air.
A beat of silence followed.
Shikamaru gaped at his end of the shredded sheet while Neji stared at the other half hanging from his slender fingers. To the Nara's utter shock, Neji choked back what sounded like a laugh.
Shikamaru glared.
He watched as the Hyūga's face tightened into the most sobered expression the Jōnin could command, his voice coming out strained in the effort to remain serious and not sound satisfied.
"When you're done behaving like a child, Shikamaru."
Shikamaru grit his teeth, grinding down against the chill prickling along his skin from the cold. Any chance of sleep, even forty-damn-winks, was shot to hell.
This was worse than a concussion.
"A child, huh?" Shikamaru flicked his gaze across to Neji's bedroll.
They shared another glance.
Neji's eyes widened. "Don't even think about it."
This time, Shikamaru smirked.
A heartbeat later they both bolted for the Hyūga's sheets.
They crashed into each other in the process, jarring shoulders and tangling legs. This launched them into a tussle as graceless as the first fight they'd had two months ago. Shikamaru attempted to get the upper-hand, using his elbow as the weapon of choice in retaliation to Neji's attempt to shove him.
He felt the hit brush along the Jōnin's jaw without impact. "Dammit."
"Hn." Neji taunted, almost smiling. "Still too slow."
Shikamaru smirked, arching a brow. "Oh yeah?"
Getting a grip on the sheets of Neji's bedroll, he feigned a kick towards Neji's stomach, forcing the Jōnin to curve to avoid it. The second Neji leaned forward he snapped his arm up and a sharp jerk of his wrist roped the sheet around the Hyūga's neck.
Got you. He tugged, only to curse as the leeway of the fabric snapped taut, caught under their bodies, foiling his attempt to jerk the Jōnin sideways.
Shikamaru blanched. "Ah, crap."
Neji snorted, easily slipping free from the noose to counter.
In the last ditch effort to defend himself, skill didn't enter into it – which is why five seconds later Shikamaru ended up on his back with Neji's fingers locked in a familiar grip around his throat.
"Serial strangler…" Shikamaru growled out, but before he could try to move, the Hyūga's thigh brushed across his hips as the Jōnin swayed to straddle him.
He felt his head smack back as Neji pinned him firmly by his throat.
Dammit… Shikamaru attempted to buck the other ninja off him, but Neji's free hand latched at his hip, pressing him down hard enough to grind bone. He winced audibly. Neji's grip adjusted, pinning him with less force, but granting him no leeway to escape.
"Give it up, Nara. You lose."
Shikamaru cursed beneath his breath, the lean planes of his stomach tightening. He twisted around in an effort to dislodge the Hyūga. But the more he shifted, the tighter Neji held him down.
Too soon, he found that movement of any kind while pressed this close to Neji was working rapidly against him. Their bodies were grinding in a way that was maddening enough with his clothes
on, let alone being half-naked.
Fuck. They were in a dangerous position here and it suddenly had nothing to do with Neji's hand around his throat.
He had to stop this now.
"Whatever," the shadow-nin muttered. "Get off me, Hyūga."
"I'll take that as your graceless surrender."
"Move already, I'm too tired for this crap…" Shikamaru swallowed thickly.
He blinked as he felt the ball of Neji's thumb drag along the edge of his jaw, hooking under his chin to force his head back a little further.
"What are you doing?" Shikamaru frowned, his dark eyes flicking up to the pale ones tracing over him.
"You're shaking…" Neji said quietly, his tone disturbingly unreadable.
"Because it's fucking cold…" Shikamaru growled, but he couldn't tell whether it was adrenalin playing through his system or something else, because he sure as hell wasn't cold right now.
Neji arched a brow, reading the lie.
The Jōnin's thumb dragged back down along his jaw and Shikamaru released a slow breath, tensing up to keep from reacting. It was total treachery on his body's part to respond this way. To be
moved this way by the heated hands of a troublesome, inextricable attraction.
Get a grip… Apathy was one hell of a selective bitch. Of all the things
not to give a crap about, now would have been the moment to be unaffected. But for all his lackadaisical inclination, Shikamaru couldn't stop what Neji was stirring up inside him.
"You're normally better at lying, Shikamaru," Neji said, the drop in his tone feeding into the humidity building between them.
"Yeah? Well, you're normally backing off at this point."
"
You should have backed off a long time ago."
I know… Shikamaru frowned, watching the moon-like irises trace their gaze along his neck. The grip at his throat loosened, then he felt the slow but deliberate drag of Neji's fingers over the bruises marking his skin from the last few times the Jōnin had gripped him.
"Does it hurt?" Neji murmured, his breath stirring the bangs framing his face.
Shikamaru felt his voice fray slightly, falling hoarse. "No."
He watched Neji through his lashes, trying his damnedest to gauge what the hell the Hyūga was doing. It didn't make sense. Part of him guessed it was payback for the last time anything this physical had played out between them.
That can't happen again. His breath snagged low in his throat as Neji's fingers slipped around to his nape. He could still feel a phantom grip at his throat, a lingering sensation that tickled his skin like the sweep of Neji's bangs when the Hyūga dipped his head.
Shit…move… Shikamaru dug his elbows into the bedroll, preparing to shift his hips sharply to jolt Neji off him before that heat pooling in his groin could start to burn.
"I won't lose to you, Shikamaru…" Neji's voice caressed the shell of his ear, the words chilling in comparison to the heated breath that carried them. "…and I won't give it up…"
Shikamaru fisted his fingers in the sheets, his jaw tightening. "Give what up?"
"Whatever you're searching for…" Neji murmured, drawing back enough to slip his lips along the shadow-nin's throat. "Whatever you're trying to do…"
...Shit. The only thing Shikamaru was presently trying to do was
not react.
He could feel Neji's mouth tracing the fading bruises at his throat, the barest scrape of teeth pulling a hiss from him. He closed his eyes against the sensation. It was like being branded
beneath his skin.
Fuck… The play of Neji's lips tugged his heartbeat into a rhythm that caused his head to spin.
…
Hell…Stop this before it goes too far. "You know…" The Nara swallowed a growl, his voice grating out huskily. "You're still paranoid…"
The grip at his nape ceased.
Neji drew back enough that their noses brushed and their gazes levelled through the low sweep of their lashes. The shadow-nin could taste Neji's breath, drawing it in like a toxin – more addictive than he imagined smoking ever would be. And just as hazardous to his health if the Hyūga's next words were anything to go by.
"I mean it, Nara…if you push me…" Neji slipped his fingers back around to brush his thumb along Shikamaru's throat, dragging across the damp chords as if mimicking a blade. "…you'll regret it."
Shikamaru blinked slowly and shook his head; the motion caused their mouths to brush, their noses bumping. "Not trying to push you."
"Then what are you trying to do every time you blur the lines?"
I'm trying to pull you back… Shikamaru clenched his jaw, not offering a response.
He watched Neji slant his head questioningly, the opal crescents of his eyes flickering, searching for an answer. Shikamaru had no intention of giving him one and instead relaxed a little, letting the tension bleed out from his muscles. But inside, he felt as tightly wound as a damn spring, a coil of arousal knotting up in the pit of his stomach...the pressure caused another telling judder to run along his spine.
Dammit. Neji didn't miss it.
Shikamaru jerked when he felt a cool palm sliding along his stomach, the lean ridges of his abdomen going rigid. His lips parted slightly beneath Neji's mouth, sucking in a breath against the hair-raising touch.
"Neji." Shikamaru snaked his hand between their bodies, catching Neji's wrist before that hand could slide south. "What…the hell are you doing…?"
The Hyūga's mouth brushed softly against his, speaking low, hypnotic words against his lips. "Giving you another reason to push me…"
Shikamaru blinked hard and snatched at the heated air rising by degrees with every shared breath. "Why?"
"Do it, Nara." Neji shook his head, the mocha strands of his hair framing both their faces. "Push me."
Shikamaru tilted his head, frowning now as he tried to scramble for sense; he wasn't the only one struggling. He could see it in the silvery eyes trying so hard to deaden the fire rising in them.
"Why, Neji?"
"Damn you…" Neji snarled, reaching up his free hand to dig his fingers into Shikamaru's nape – his voice rasping out. "
Do it."
Shikamaru lifted his shoulders against the uncomfortable grip but he fought to keep his head as level as his voice. "
Why?"
Neji stared down at him, warring for control. The shadow-nin offered no attack or defence in response, just remained very still and very quiet.
When Neji finally spoke, his voice was a tight whisper. "Because I need to push you
back."
Shikamaru's eyes widened…then softened.
"Don't." Neji shook his head. "Don't look at me like that."
Shikamaru felt the tension crumble away from his face. He released his latch at Neji's wrist, but didn't give the Hyūga time to respond before he reached up to rake his fingers into the Jōnin's dark mane, kneading Neji's scalp lightly.
"Troublesome," he said softly.
He watched something tear across Neji's eyes before the Hyūga shuttered his gaze, trying to hide whatever it was that rippled across the pale orbs. Shikamaru once again allowed unspoken words to play into his touch, kneading his fingers down to Neji's nape until he felt the grip at the back of his own neck loosen.
The cold steel of Neji's hitai-ate settled at his brow.
They stayed this way for a moment, both shackled by silence.
Shikamaru's heartbeat had steadied, but that heat remained tightly fisted in his core, tendrils of it leaking into his blood every time Neji's breath ghosted across his lips.
The links of tension between them practically hummed.
Then it happened.
Shikamaru had no idea how, but they moved at exactly the same time.
A subtle tilt of their heads and their mouths slanted together, brushing softly. It was a fleeting sweep that led to a mutual parting of lips, but neither moved to deepen the kiss. They shared breath for a moment, mouths hovering close, tasting the intoxicating hint of a kiss without dipping into the tangle of tongues.
Once again they were barely touching, but just this was enough to strike a fever between them. Shikamaru could feel Neji's breath shaking against his lips, an erotic shiver of restrained desire. It almost snapped his sanity then and there. He'd never experienced this kind of captivated lust before; and all the complicated
wants that came with it.
Neji leaned in again, then froze.
Shikamaru heard it a second later.
The soft sound of voices carrying just beyond the tent.
It broke the spell cast over their senses, dousing some of the heat. Neji drew back and Shikamaru dropped his hand away, both of them dragging in air that didn't taste of each other. The Hyūga remained kneeling for a moment, allowing enough room for Shikamaru to sit up.
There was no way to tell what the last few minutes had done to the precarious ground they had managed to establish. Shikamaru couldn't tell whether a wedge had just slammed down between them, or something had just thrust them closer.
The silence offered no answers and Neji's eyes held nothing but questions when they flicked up again.
Shikamaru couldn't respond to them.
He didn't want to.
He didn't want to
want to.
Neji offered a final, conflicted glance before he turned in a fluid, graceful motion, his calm poise at total odds with the look in his eyes as he quietly swept out of the tent.
The minute the flap rustled shut Shikamaru clenched his eyes shut and flopped back onto the bedroll, rubbing his hands across his face and sighing into the cup of his palms.
Fuck. A shuddering sigh rattled out of him before he dragged his fingertips to his head, gripping his skull.
What the hell am I doing…? The sound of footsteps caused him to drop his hands and glance toward the tent flap. He didn't have to wait long for the hovering person to speak.
"Shikamaru?"
Sakura…