Hard Love Life

Hidan awoke to Zekkou crying. He sighed and got up, picking him up gently. "Shh, It's okay sweetie. Oh dear... You need a new diaper."

Kakuzu continued to sleep.

"Kakuzu, where are the diapers?" Hidan asked, nudging Kakuzu with his foot.

Kakuzu grunted, "Closet."

Hidan nodded and went to the closet, grabbing a diaper and setting Zekkou on the changing table. "Hmm, doesn't smell all that bad. Zetsu’s breath smells worse." he said as he tossed the used diaper into the trash, "Now to wipe you clean. Kakuzu you mind helping me?"

Kakuzu sighed and crawled out of bed, rubbing his eye tiredly, "Do we need two people to change a diaper?"

"I don't know how to put one on." Hidan said tiredly, finished with cleaning Zekkou up.

Kakuzu nodded and put on the diaper.

Hidan sighed and put Zekkou back to bed. "Glad he doesn't cry nonstop." he said as he crawled back to bed.

Kakuzu nodded and slipped in next to Hidan.

Hidan scratched his head. "When can we go to a night club?"

Kakuzu shrugged, "In a week or so?"

"A week?" Hidan asked pouting.

Kakuzu nodded and fell back asleep.

Hidan sighed. "Damn it. This is gonna be boring." he said before rolling over and falling asleep as well.

Kakuzu woke up a few hours later.

Hidan snored quietly, a loopy smile on his face.

Kakuzu shook Hidan awake.

"Huh? What is it?" Hidan asked, pouting angrily.

Kakuzu smiled, "I just wanted to see your gorgeous eyes."

"Oh god... I'll go into a coma from all this niceness." Hidan said, groaning.

Kakuzu smirked, "But wasn't that such a lovely way to wake up?"

"No. A good way to wake up is to you molesting me." Hidan said before yawning.

"That's not creepy..."

"I wouldn't care." Hidan said, stretching, "I'm always consenting Kakuzu unless I say other wise."

"That doesn't make it any less creepy," Kakuzu said looking away.

"It’s not creepy." Hidan said, rolling his eyes, "It's only creepy if you do it to someone you don't know." Hidan got out of bed and picked Zekkou out of his bassinet before going to the small refrigerator and pulling out a bottle of his breast milk, "Are you hungry Mr. perfect?"

"You need to warm that up before you give it to him."

Hidan pouted at Kakuzu and put the bottle in his pants leg. "I'll warm it up to my body temperature then." he said.

"That's going to take forever, why don't you just go to the kitchen, boil a pot of water and put the bottle in?"

"He isn't hungry just yet. He's not crying and he is very much awake." Hidan said, stroking Zekkou's cheek with a finger, "Plus we are using the electric blanket, so lets just turn it on... There! Now it will warm up faster."

Kakuzu sighed and shrugged, standing up and walking out of the room to go talk with Konan.

Hidan pouted as Kakuzu left. "Meany." he muttered before turning his attention back on his baby.

Kakuzu managed to find Konan and talked with her for a while before persuading her to take a look at Zekkou.

"Alright. I'll look at him." Konan said, raising her hands in defeat making her way to Kakuzu's room, "Did the birth go well?"

Kakuzu nodded, "He's quite the handsome bugger too. I wish he looked more like his mother though."

"He might look like Hidan when he grows older." Konan said, "So why do you need me?"

Kakuzu smirked, "I wanted you to see him because he's so damn cute."

"Is that all? Are you wanting me to fall in love with him so I can watch him while you and Hidan..." Konan paused, "Can do what ever perverted things you do?"

Kakuzu nodded, "Pretty much, but this for Hidan, not me."

"Why is it for Hidan?" Konan asked, stopping so Kakuzu would answer.

Kakuzu shrugged, "He wants to go clubbing and all the shit now, and honestly I don't want to go. But it's to make Hidan happy."

"You might like it." Konan said, continuing on her way before stopping in front of the bedroom door, "Well open it."

Kakuzu opened the door and let Konan in. "Hidan, I have company."

Hidan looked up, feeding Zekkou. "Why did you bring Konan here?"

Kakuzu smiled, "Because I wanted to show him off."

Hidan pouted. "Fine." Hidan said, shifting so Konan could see him.

Konan looked at Zekkou for a bit before turning around and dashing off. "I'll look after him!" she called back.

Kakuzu chuckled slightly, "I think Pein’s going to be mad at us."

"Why?" Hidan asked, moving Zekkou to rest on his shoulder and patting his back.

"Because Konan probably wants a baby now."

"Oh." Hidan said, "Which leader will she choose?"

Kakuzu shrugged, "Who knows?"

Hidan smiled, chuckling when Zekkou burped. "He is cute. I can't stand it."

Kakuzu smiled and sat next to Hidan. "Mhm, cute just like his momma."

"I'm more sexy then cute." Hidan said, pouting.

"You keep telling yourself that Hidan."

"What can I do to prove I'm sexy?" Hidan said, glaring at Kakuzu, "I used to be sexy."

"You still are sexy, just not as sexy as you are cute," Kakuzu said, shrugging.

"I don't want to be cute." Hidan said, refraining from yelling.

"Hidan, calm down baby." Kakuzu leaned over and stroked Hidan's cheek. "Calm down."

Hidan pouted playfully at Kakuzu, leaning in to his hand. "I love you jerk."

Kakuzu smiled and stole Zekkou from Hidan. "I love you too."

"No! Give me back my baby~!" Hidan whined, trying to get Zekkou back.

Kakuzu huffed and pushed Hidan away, "You're hogging him. He's half mine too, even if you did all the work."

"But he's my baby~! I carried him in me for almost nine months." Hidan said, whimpering, "I love him more then you."

Kakuzu handed back the baby, glaring at Hidan slightly before standing and leaving quietly.

Hidan pouted and laid down, petting Zekkou's head. "I'm sorry you have to see us fighting."

Kakuzu walked to the girls' room and smiled, "Hey girls."

"Daddy!" Seiun and Acheron squealed, grabbing on to Kakuzu's legs. "Sorry we said all those things about our brother." Seiun said, looking at Kakuzu sadly, "Is momma watching him now?"

Kakuzu picked up both of them, "Yes, your momma is watching him." He kissed both of their foreheads, "Have you been good?"

"Yes." Acheron said, kissing Kakuzu's cheek, "Real good."

"How about we go out for ice cream then?" Kakuzu asked putting both of them down.

"Is momma not coming?" Seiun asked.

"Momma is busy with Zekkou."

"What he doing?" Acheron asked, holding he arm up, begging to be carried.

Kakuzu picked up Acheron and shrugged, "Just taking care of him."

"So brother can't come?" Acheron asked, wrapping her arms around Kakuzu's neck.

Kakuzu shook his head, "Nope, he can't."

Acheron pouted. "I want him to come." she said.

Kakuzu frowned, "You can't always get what you want."

Acheron whined and buried her face into Kakuzu's neck, throwing a small fit. "No."

Kakuzu sighed, "Get over it."

"Daddy don't be mean." Seiun said, sitting on the floor.

Kakuzu grunted, "C'mon, let's go out for ice cream."

Acheron shook her head. "I want momma." she whined. Seiun looked nervously at her sister and them to her dad. "Acheron do what daddy says. He'll yell at us again."

Kakuzu sighed, "Your mother is busy, I already told you that."

"Momma." Acheron continued to press, squirming in Kakuzu's arms, "Want momma."

Kakuzu set her down, "No. She's busy."

"Isn't momma a boy?" Seiun asked.

Kakuzu just rolled his eyes and walked out, "You're both grounded for being smart-aleks and talking back to me."

"What did I do?" Seiun asked, starting to cry as Kakuzu left.

Kakuzu went back to the bedroom and growled, "We have the most annoying daughters."

Hidan chucked a paper weight at Kakuzu. "Fuck you! You wanted them. What were you expecting you bastard? Are they supposed to be little adults?"

Kakuzu rolled his eyes. "No, but I wish they wouldn't be so stubborn whine I tell them that you're busy and can't go out for ice cream. I mean, I just wanted my alone time with them and they have to be brats about it."

"I want ice cream." Hidan said sadly, "I've been ignoring them a lot, what do you expect. They are not brats. You'd never call them that if they were really yours."

"I've been ignoring them a lot too, I just wanted some alone time with my daughters," Kakuzu sighed, "I'd call them brats either way."

"Well then do it. Don't complain to me about it and leave them all alone." Hidan looked up from Zekkou, "Did you make them cry?"

"I grounded them," Kakuzu said, "So I probably did."

"Unground them and take them out." Hidan ordered, "They only wanted me."

"Yes, that's the problem, only want you. They don't love me."

"Well you've been mean to them before." Hidan pointed out, "It's hard to love an asshole."

"Then why do you love me? Why don't you just leave me then?!"

"First of all, I meant a different sort of love. You're not their real father." Hidan said coolly, "They love you differently. Zekkou here will love you no matter what you do. They will love you to a point."

Kakuzu sighed and sat across from Hidan, "So what can they do? Go back to live in the ghetto?"

"They can hate you." Hidan said, "They can also run away."

"And go where?"

"Anywhere." Hidan said, "Kids are not very smart when it comes to rational thought."

Kakuzu shrugged, "I think they know now to run away."

"Shut up and take them out." Hidan hissed, kissing Zekkou's cheek.

Kakuzu sighed and left the room to go back to the girls' room, letting himself in, "I'm sorry you two."

Acheron looked up from her doll. "Seiun is under the bed daddy."

Kakuzu sighed and picked up the bed, "Come on out."

"Your not supposed to do that." Seiun said, wiping her eyes, "You were supposed to crawl under too."

Kakuzu sighed, "I guess I'm not a good dad then?"

"That's not it." Seiun said, "Put the bed down and come under here."

Kakuzu sighed again and put the bed down, crawling under the bed.

"What did I do?" Seiun asked again.

"You were being a smart alec," Kakuzu said.

"What does that mean?" Seiun asked, sniffling, "I mean, being smart is a good thing but you grounded me."

"It means you were talking back to me in ... Look, I'm sorry and that's all that matters."

"How can be one if I don't know what it means?" Seiun asked, crawling a bit closer to Kakuzu.

Kakuzu sighed, "Just drop it or we won't go out for ice cream."

Seiun scooted away from Kakuzu again until she was against the wall. She buried her face in her hands. "You can't see me."

Kakuzu smirked, "Where did Seiun go? I guess she can't go to get ice cream if I can't find her..."

Seiun remained quiet. She really did not want to be seen even if she liked ice cream.

Kakuzu slipped out from under the bed and shrugged, "Oh well, Acheron, have you seen your sister? I can't find her."

Acheron looked under the bed, clearly seeing her sister. "She's under the bed covering her face- Ow! Daddy she pinched me!"

Kakuzu shrugged, "I was just under the bed and I didn't see her."

"She's there. I'll show you." Acheron said, crawling under the bed. There was scuffling sounds and small squeaks before Acheron came back out in tears. "Daddy, Seiun mean. Look at my arm."

Kakuzu frowned at the bed, "If you weren't grounded before Seiun for a reason, then you're grounded now for hurting your sister." He leaned down and gave Acheron's bite mark a kiss. "Want to go out for ice cream to make you feel better?"

Acheron nodded. "Will you tell momma what she did?" She asked, raising her arms in the air again.

Kakuzu picked her up, "Do you want me to?" He began walking out of the bedroom.

"No." Acheron replied, looking over Kakuzu's shoulder to see Seiun poke her head out from under the bed, "What would momma do if you did?"

Kakuzu walked out the bedroom and closed the door behind him. "I don't know."

"How many scoops?" Acheron asked, referring to ice cream.

"As many as you want," Kakuzu said, kissing her forehead. "Do you love your daddy?"

"Yes." Acheron said, kissing Kakuzu's cheek, "Less go."

Kakuzu smiled, "Daddy loves you too." He began towards the village.

"Daddy, what’s grounded?" Acheron asked, playing with Kakuzu's hair.

"It means that you're in your room with no fun. You're punished," Kakuzu explained, kissing her nose. "Want to see the baby when you get back?"

"Ogay. I thought you liked Seiun best." Acheron said, giggling, "Yes."

"I don’t. I love both of you the same," Kakuzu said, "Okay, we'll talk to momma about it."

"But you talk to her more." Acheron said, "Daddy, we walked by."

"Just because she's there," Kakuzu turned around and went to the ice-cream stand. "Order anything you want."

"I want... Uh..... strawberry cheesecake flavor." Acheron said, "In a coco coated cone."

Kakuzu nodded, "And I'll have vanilla with strawberries in a bowl."

Acheron yawned. "Daddy. Don't want Seiun to be grounded." she said, rubbing her eyes.

Kakuzu nodded, "No falling asleep right now. We just got your ice cream."

"Ogay." Acheron nodded and reached out for her Ice-cream, "Yummy."

Kakuzu reached for his as well. "Can you walk? I want to eat my ice cream."

Acheron nodded, beginning to lick her ice-cream after Kakuzu set her down. "Yummy." she mumbled again.

Kakuzu began to eat his ice cream, going to the tables near the ice cream stand.

Acheron ate her ice-cream quickly. "No brain freeze." she said.

Kakuzu smiled, "That's good."

Acheron yawned again. After a bit she rested her head on the table and fell asleep.

Kakuzu smiled and looked at her, finishing his ice cream and picking her up, bringing her back to the base and dropping her off in her bedroom before heading back to his own.

Hidan snored as Kakuzu came in, very much asleep. On his chest laid Zekkou while to his side was Seiun.

Kakuzu went and got Acheron and took her to his bedroom and laid her down with all of them before crawling into bed himself.

Zekkou woke up awhile after, squirming on Hidan's chest. Hidan's hand instantly came ups to rest on his small back, shushing him.

Kakuzu grunted slightly, snoring.

Hidan sighed and opened his eyes a bit, huffing. "I wish I could hug all of them." He said, kissing Zekkou's head softly as he petting Seiun and Acheron’s hair with the other.

Kakuzu rolled over and wrapped an arm around Hidan's waist.

"Hi Kakuzu." Hidan said, "Can you watch the kids for a while?" I need to do my thing."

Kakuzu nodded and waved Hidan off.

Hidan smiled and got himself all ready for his favorite ritual; killing stuff.

Kakuzu fell back to sleep.

Hidan return hours later, feeling extremely giddy. He crawled onto the bed and to Kakuzu, bleeding everywhere. "Kakuzu-chan."

Kakuzu woke up and looked sleepily at Hidan, "Hmmm?"

"Hello." Hidan said, smiling insanely, "How about we move the kids to another room?"

Kakuzu sighed, "Hidan, I'm tired."

"Who said I wanted sex?" Hidan asked.

Kakuzu grunted and got up, moving the kids to their room along with Zekkou's bassinet. When he was done he sat on the bed, "What do you want?"

"Pain. I want pain. More of it. The sweet wife is gone. Only the old Hidan remains." Hidan said.

"I'm going to miss him..." Kakuzu said, looking to the side.

“You don’t like the old Hidan.”

He looked around, "Uh... I do. Just I got used to the new you."

"Why are you not looking at me?" Hidan asked, sitting on Kakuzu's lap and smirking at him, "Do you not like me this way?"

He kissed up Hidan's neck, "I love you anyway."

Hidan smirked and raked his nails down Kakuzu's back, leaving red marks that bleed a bit. "Come on. Hurt me."

Kakuzu used his threads to pin Hidan down to the bed and he found a kunai to thrust in between Hidan's ribs.

Hidan hissed in relief, felling his blood, flow over his skin. "Put me on the floor. I want you to dissect me. Haven't you ever wondered how I work?"

He tossed Hidan on the floor carelessly. "Not really, because I never cared."

Hidan hissed in pain as his skull his the floor. "Well do it any way." he snarled.

"Bossy much?" Kakuzu began to cut open Hidan, pulling out organs as he moved down.

Hidan licked his lips as he ran a finger down his still untouched chest. "Why are you..." He trailed off as Kakuzu ran his hand over his liver, shivering.

Kakuzu tugged at Hidan's stomach, ripping the tendons that kept it in place and held it in his hand, squeezing it softly, seeing if it'd have the effect he thought it would.

Hidan arched his back of the ground, groaning in pain. He panted out a mantra of swear words, many on one breath. "Keep going." Hidan urged, smirking at his husband.

He took the kunai and shoved it in Hidan's lung while he began to pull out Hidan's ribs, trying to get to his heart.

Hidan lost his breath for a second. He continued to smirk at Kakuzu, sliding his hands up his arm. "Hit me." Hidan commanded, felling his pants grow tight. He would have to go into the shower after this to not only clean up, but to have a bit of fun with himself.

"I have a better idea," Kakuzu said, finally getting to Hidan's heart and leaning down, placing a tender kiss on it before taking the kunai out and shoving it into the heart.

Hidan tossed his head to the side, whining loudly. "Yesfuckyesshit!" Hidan gasped hurriedly, running his fingers over his ribs, "Feel so fucking good. Holly! Hit me you cock sucker!"

He punched Hidan in the jaw, smirking slightly.

Hidan growled and spat out one of his teeth, grimacing slightly at the blood that thickly filled his mouth. "Touch everything in me."

"Will that grow back?" Kakuzu asked, starting with Hidan's small intestine and ending with Hidan's lungs.

"No." Hidan croaked out, spitting out the blood, "You'll have to put it back."

"Great." Kakuzu muttered, pulling out one of Hidan's kidney's.

"Having fun?" Hidan asked, "See anything out of the ordinary? Cancer maybe?" He chuckled, grabbing some of his intestines and tugging on them roughly.

Kakuzu nodded, "This is quite fun." He removed Hidan's appendix next.

"You can stop now." Hidan said, panting, "Put me back together so I can have some fun time in the shower."

Kakuzu nodded, putting everything back in and stitched Hidan up, putting the tooth back in as well.

Hidan sat up slowly. "See you in a bit." he said to Kakuzu, standing up and walking off to the bathroom.

Kakuzu followed him, going to take a shower as well.

"Oh you’re following me?" Hidan asked, sounding like he was drunk, "Is it to clean up?"

"Mhm," Kakuzu hummed, "I need to wash off this blood."

Hidan smiled at Kakuzu and walked into the shower and sat on the floor. "To tired to stand."

Kakuzu smirked and stepped into the shower after stripping his clothes.

Hidan leaned against the wall, watching his blood go down the drain. "Hmm. It was fun wasn't it?" he asked, smiling.

Kakuzu nodded, "It was."

"I wish you had let me go alone." Hidan said, looking up at Kakuzu, "It got me all antsy as you can see."

"Sorry." Kakuzu said, "Want me to get out?"

"Finish up and I'll have me fun." Hidan said lazily, smiling, "We lack a sex life now don't we?"

Kakuzu sighed and finished up, getting out, "We don't."

Hidan sighed. "Good bye Kakuzu." he said.

Kakuzu left and went to the bedroom, cleaning up all the blood.

Loud wailing came from the bedroom where the kids were put. Zekkou was awake and upset.

Kakuzu stood up and walked to the bedroom and picked up Zekkou. "What's wrong baby?"

Zekkou whimpered, growing silent for a bit before crying again. He kicked his legs as his face grew a bit red.

Kakuzu carried Zekkou to their bedroom, pulling out a bottle and quickly taking it to the kitchen to warm it up. "Hush. Shhh. Shhh."

Zekkou calmed down a little, still crying but much softer.

Kakuzu kissed Zekkou's forehead. "Shhh."

Zekkou finally calmed down. He however had a look of discomfort on his little face. His tummy didn't feel to good.

Kakuzu brought Zekkou to his shoulder and began to pat his back.

Zekkou began to whimper again. After a will his little stomach heaved and he vomited on Kakuzu's shoulder, beginning to cry again.

Kakuzu grimaced. "I just took a shower Zekkou." He sighed and took the milk out of the stove, testing it out on his wrist before holding the bottle up to the Zekkou's mouth.

Zekkou turned his head away, refusing to eat. He began coughing and sputtering.

"You are aware you're making his aspirate on his own vomit." Itachi said, standing in the kitchen doorway.

Kakuzu looked desperately at Itachi. "I have no clue what I'm doing." He pat Zekkou's back, trying make him throw up again or something.

Itachi sighed and took Zekkou away from Kakuzu and held him so he was facing the floor. "Keep him like that and take him to a doctor. Honestly you should have done that when he was born." he held Zekkou out for Kakuzu to take him.

Kakuzu groaned, "Blame Hidan, I haven't been with the kid for more than an hour." He sighed and left the kitchen, throwing on some shoes and his cloak after wiping off the puke with a towel and going to doctor, calling out to Itachi in the kitchen to tell Hidan where he was going once he got out of the shower.

"Where are you going?" Hidan asked, darting in front of Kakuzu, "What's wrong?"

Kakuzu sidestepped him, continuing on his way, "Go ask Itachi, no time to tell you now." He held onto Zekkou's head and began to run so he didn't get SBS as they went to the doctors.

Hidan dashed after Kakuzu, already dressed. "Where are you taking my baby?!" he yelled, just behind Kakuzu.

"To the doctor's Hidan. And stop calling him yours. He's ours."

"Well what's wrong with him?" Hidan asked, "Can you blame me from being possessive?"

"Just... Shut up Hidan." Kakuzu sighed when they finally got to the doctors, setting Zekkou on the counter.

"Don't put him on a cold surface." Hidan said, gently taking Zekkou from Kakuzu. He signed in and went back into the waiting room and sat down, cradling Zekkou close to him.

Kakuzu rolled his eyes. "And again I don't get my son. Might as well not even be his father." The woman at the counter gave him a sympathetic smile and handed him documents to fill out.

"Shut up." Hidan said, kissing Zekkou's forehead, "You didn't give birth to him. I did. I'm much closer to him in certain ways then you are."

Kakuzu rolled his eyes again. "What ever Hidan." He began muttering to himself, shaking his head.

"I'm just as worried as you are." Hidan snapped, “Now get over here and sit with my while you fill that out.”

Kakuzu sighed and sat next to Hidan, filling out the papers.

Hidan leaned next to Kakuzu and trembled. "Is he going to be okay Kakuzu?" he asked.

Kakuzu sighed, "I don't… I don’t know."

Hidan squeezed his eyes shut and nuzzled Zekkou. "Our poor baby."

Kakuzu kissed Hidan's cheek. "I'm sure he'll be fine."

A few tears leaked out of Hidan's eyes but he got over it quickly. He stood when their names were called. "Come on Kakuzu."

Kakuzu stroked Hidan's hair. He walked to the nurse when their names were called.

They were led into a warm room and told to wait for the doctor. "We'll look like awful parents. He is only in a diaper." Hidan said.

"That's because I was just about to feed him," Kakuzu said, "And you were in the shower when he threw up on me."

"He should be dress all the time unless it's fucking hot out." Hidan said, rubbing his son's back.

"Well, I'm fucking sorry Hidan. Maybe you shouldn't have been jacking off in the shower."

"Shut up. I'm practically a teenager still." Hidan said sadly, sniffing, "Only my kids like me."

Kakuzu wrapped his arm around Hidan's waist. "I love you. Not only the kids like you."

"You get angry at me for being horny." Hidan said, "Some love that is."

"I'm sorry Hidan, sometimes you go overboard," Kakuzu said, "I do love you, don't ever doubt me."

"I hadn't been horny in months!" Hidan snapped, "What am I supposed to do? Paralyze you so I can rape you?"

Kakuzu shrugged, "I'm not surprised if you actually did."

"I respect you. Why? Do you want me to do that?" Hidan asked.

Kakuzu sighed, "No, but sometimes, before you got pregnant, I actually could see you doing that." He looked down at Zekkou. "He's so handsome."

"I might have." Hidan said, looking down at Zekkou, "He is. In a baby way."

Kakuzu nuzzled Hidan. "I do love you." He sighed, kissing Hidan's temple.

The doctor came in and looked briefly. "Vomiting is common in newborns. It wasn't projectile so he's fine." was all he said before leaving.

Hidan blinked. "What? It's common?"

Kakuzu blinked. "Oh that son of a bitch Itachi. Told me to go to the doctor's. All he said was it was common. I wasted money for this. Good money. Money that could've been used for something fucking important."

"Stop it Kakuzu. He has a baby brother right?" Hidan asked, shrinking away from his husband.

Kakuzu nodded, "I'm pretty sure he does."

"Lets go." Hidan said, standing up and going to the door, "Open it? I have hands full of baby."

Kakuzu opened the door, going back to grumbling about money and Itachi.

"Kakuzu stop it. It was only three-hundred ryo." Hidan said, kissing Zekkou's cheek, "It wasn’t some expensive surgery."

Kakuzu huffed and pouted, folding his arms over his chest. "Itachi pisses me off."

"Stop." Hidan said firmly, "It was just some money. Our baby's health is more important then that."

"Not when there's nothing wrong with him."

"We didn't know that." Hidan said.

"We should've known that."

"We're new at this Kakuzu." Hidan said, feeling even worse, "How can money be more important to you then Zekkou's health?"

Kakuzu sighed, kissing Hidan's cheek. "It isn't more important."

"Then you should be ranting on how glad you are that nothing is wrong with him." Hidan said, frowning.

Kakuzu huffed, "I am."

"Then talk about that."

"Let me hold him."

Hidan nodded and gave Zekkou to Kakuzu. "He's so small."

Kakuzu held Zekkou close to him. "That's because he's a baby."

"My sister was bigger then him" Hidan said, tilting his head to the side.

Kakuzu shrugged, "He was also born two week early because someone just had to go for a walk."

"I think it was more then that, but whatever." Hidan said, wrapping his arm around Kakuzu's middle.

"Oh yeah, like a month early," Kakuzu shook his head, "He's going to be a runt."

"They come when they come Kakuzu. Be glad it wasn't more." Hidan snapped, glaring at people who were looking at them oddly.

"They don't come when you sit and relax all the time that late in the pregnancy."

"It can happen at anytime." Hidan said, pouting, "I had fun, and I really wanted him to be born in a park."

"Well, I'm sure other people didn't want him to be born there."

"They didn't even know." Hidan said, "I really want to go dancing."

"Why do you want to drag me to do something I don't want to do? Why do you always do that? Whatever. We can go tonight."

"You don't have to dance." Hidan said, I'll go nuts and you can watch."

Kakuzu rolled his eyes, "Whatever, no dancing with other people though."

"Fine." Hidan said, "I have the perfect dress."

"Dress? You're going as a woman?"

"Yes I am. It's more fun." Hidan said, "Why? You don't want that?"

"I just thought you' want to be a man after nine months of being a woman."

"I want to make you jealous." Hidan said, smiling.

Kakuzu frowned, "That's not nice."

"I don't care. I want to dance and fell sexy and get people to look at me." Hidan said, pouting innocently.

Kakuzu sighed, "Fine, but I want to see big breasts on you then."

"Fine." Hidan said, smiling.

"The bigger the better," Kakuzu said.

"I'm only doing DDDs." Hidan said, "Any bigger and men will be jumping me on the dance floor."

Kakuzu nodded, "I'd have to kill them."

"Yes you would." Hidan said, humming a tune, "But don't."