The Art of Comedy Combat

Clowning Around

Written By: PrinceofPervs

Summary: What if Naruto revealed a fighting style not seen since his mother, Uzumaki Kushina, perished? After all, he's called the Number one COMEDY Ninja for a reason... Naruto/Harem. Because women love funny men.

Okay, here is the next chapter! Hope you like this even more than the last one!


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The entire room was stunned into silence.

They couldn't believe what they had just witnessed. A boy...who used pies, a banana, and a RUBBER CHICKEN of all things...won against one of the top students from the graduating year.

To say that they were shocked would be a HUGE understatement.

The silence continued for some time, until Sakura began cheering wildly for the blonde.

"WHOO HOO! ALRIGHT, NARUTO! WAY TO GO!" Sakura cheered loudly.

'Na...Naruto-kun did it...he r-really did it...!' Hinata thought, feeling very happy for the blond. Of course she still felt sorry for her friend and teammate Kiba, but she couldn't say that he wasn't asking for it with how he underestimated Naruto like that.

She took a look at the container full of healing slave that she had left over from the second exam. Naruto wasn't hurt from his match with Kiba at all...and she knew that she should be worrying about Kiba right now...but she couldn't help it as she rushed over to a beaming Naruto who was climbing up the stairs. Curse her hormones!

"Um...Na-Naruto-kun..." Hinata said, looking at the ground shyly as she came before the Comedy Ninja.

"Hm? Oh, hi, Hinata-chan!" Naruto greeted. "Did you need something?"

"Um...well..." Hinata stuttered, trying hard to find the courage to give Naruto the container. "Um...here!" She thrust the contained into Naruto's arms, blushing as her hands made brief contact with the blond's arms.

"Huh?" Naruto said, startled by the sudden movement Hinata had done. "What's this?"

"It's...it's a healing slave...I know t-that you didn't g-get hurt in your f-fight with K-kiba-kun...but I thought that you...well..." Hinata stuttered, poking her index fingers together in a nervous gesture as she blushed bright red.

Naruto was stunned, but touched by Hinata's kindness. And now that he thought about it, she was one of the few who had always been kind to him in class, even if she didn't talk much. That was enough to make her a friend in his eyes.

Naruto was about to thank her, before he saw her turn pale all of a sudden, and heard Hayate call out the next match.

"Hyuuga Neji vs Hyuuga Hinata. Will both fighters please come down to the arena?"

Hinata looked as though she had seen a ghost. She turned paler than normal, and her eyes went wide.

This couldn't be real. It just COULDN'T! She never thought that she would have to fight her Cousin of all people! Hinata began to feel a bit sick to her stomach. There was no way that she could beat her cousin, the genius of the Hyuuga clan! ...Maybe she would be better off quitting, and saving herself the trouble of an embarrassing defeat...

Naruto saw how scared Hinata looked. He just couldn't understand WHY she was so scared. I mean, this Neji guy had the same last name that she did. So he wouldn't do anything to hurt her too badly...right?

'Even so, Hinata won't be a match for him in her current state of mind, if the rumors I've heard about Neji are true...maybe that new vial I created could be of some help...but I haven't quite got the taste down yet...' Naruto thought for a moment. Then he pounded his hand into his open palm. "I've got it!"

Despite what other people thought, Naruto wasn't all that dense. Well, not ever since he began to train in the art of Comedy Combat. It required the foresight of other people's intentions to really work, so that moves like Naruto's Laugh Gas Surprise would be able to hit their mark. That's why he had gotten Kiba so mad, so that his defense would crumble, and that he would be easier to hit.

Naruto had known about Hinata's crush on him for some time now. Even since she had first talked to him, Naruto could tell that something was off about her. Sure, she was shy around other people as well, but even more so when it came to the blond. It didn't take the Comedy user too long to figure it out.

Hence the idea that popped into his head. He had read one of Kakashi's books when he wasn't looking (more like Kakashi LET him read it while he was PRETENDING to not look), and was curious by one of the characters. He had done this thing called 'seducing', and whatever it was, the female seemed to like it a WHOLE lot. Maybe he could convince Hinata to drink the vial if he seduced her! It was brilliant!

Hinata gulped down her fear. Regardless of her fear, she couldn't let herself appear weak in front of Naruto-kun. She had to be strong...even if it meant fighting in a battle that she had no hope of winning. With her resolve in place, she made to go slowly down the stairs...

Only to freeze as Naruto wrapped his arms around her middle, and rested his head on her shoulder.

"Hinata-chan..." Naruto breathed into her ear, causing shivers to go through the female Hyuuga. "...Have I ever told you...that you have the most adorable voice I've ever heard...?"

Hinata could have sworn that she had just died and gone to heaven. Naruto-kun...had his arms wrapped around her...and was resting his head so close to her ear...his breath felt so hot...and his voice sounded even HOTTER... it took all it had for the Hyuuga to not faint.

"What the hell...WHAT does your student think that he is trying to do to Hinata-chan...?" Kurenai growled towards Kakashi, resisting the urge to run over and stab Naruto with a kunai.

"...I have no idea..." Kakashi said, mentally cursing Naruto in his head. Of all the times to re-perform an act right out of his book...

"Mmmm...that voice...does things to me, Hinata-chan. ...NAUGHTY things..." Naruto purred into the bright red Hinata's ear. He heard Hinata give a little gasp as his hand trailed along the side of the Hyuuga's belly, slowly sliding and caressing through the soft skin concealed by her thick jacket. Soon, he moved it to where the Hyuuga's breast would be, and teasingly caressed close to it, enjoying the tiny moan that Hinata gave.

"Well...that Uzumaki kid is smooth...not bad," Kankuro chuckled. "Of course, he's nothing compared to me."

"...You just keep telling yourself that, little brother," Temari replied, rolling her eyes.

"What the HELL is Naruto doing to innocent Hinata-chan?!" Ino snarled, holding herself back from KILLING the other blonde as he began to slowly caress the Hyuuga's breasts.

"Something that Hinata seems to like, if her moans are any indication," Shikamaru replied.

Hinata couldn't believe that this was happening. Not even in her wildest dreams had she imanged that her beloved Naruto-kun would just...TAKE her like this! And in front of EVERYONE to boot! And the scary thing was...she liked it even more that way! Oh Kami... "Oh, N-Naruto-kun..."

Neji watched on in disgust. He cared not which loser happened to be involved with his pathetic cousin, but for them to have the GALL to do it in broad daylight...and to keep him waiting like this! It was disrespectful! Humph...well, he would teach his cousin a lesson that she soon wouldn't forget.

Naruto saw how Hinata was turning into putty in her hands, and decided to go for the kill.

"Hinata-chan. I know that you can beat this Neji guy...I can see it in your eyes...and if you DO beat him..."

Naruto leaned in and said in the littlest whisper that he could.

"I'm gonna sex you UP..."

THUD.

Hinata fainted.

Naruto blinked as he looked at the laid out Hyuuga, before shrugging. "I guess I must have over did it. Oh well." And he proceeded to open Hinata's mouth while plugging her nose, and pouring the vial he had into her mouth.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!" Kurenai screamed, being held back by Kakashi as she tried to bum rush the blond who was doing such vile things to her student.

"Calm down, Kurenai! I'm sure that Naruto has a good reason for what he's doing!" Kakashi reassured her. '...I think.'

"He better. Or I'll beat his ass myself!" Sakura growled.

Soon, the last of the potion that Naruto fed Hinata vanished, and nothing happened for a while. But soon, Hinata's eyes began to open slowly. "Where...where am I...?" She said.

"Hinata-chan, you okay?" Naruto's voice said from above her. When she saw Naruto, her face lit up.

"Naruto-kun!" She squealed, throwing herself on top of the stunned blond and kissing him with a passion.

The rest of the people had their eyes bugged out at the display, Kurenai in particular.

Soon enough, Naruto was able to push Hinata off of him, before he got TOO into the kiss. "Maybe later, Hinata-chan. Right now, you have to fight Neji..."

"Neji-nii? I'd rather have you do that sexing up thing you mentioned!" Hinata huffed, her cheeks puffing up in a cute way. "But I guess I'll play with Neji-nii for a bit...and THEN you can sex me up!"

"...Sure, Hinata-chan. Sure," Naruto said with a nervous smile.

"YAY!" Hinata cheered, giving Naruto a little peck before she jumped down into the arena.

"Naruto...what the blue HELL did you give her?" Sakura said, walking up behind the blond and cracking her knuckles.

"Just watch, you'll see," Naruto chuckled.

Neji glared at Hinata as she skipped towards the middle of the arena. "Are you ready to see just how weak you are, Hinata-sama?" Neji spat out the last part.

"Whatever, Neji-nii. Let's just do this quick so I can get back to Naru-kun!" Hinata said, taking up a stance. "Ready when you are, girly-man!"


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And that ends this chapter. What did Naruto give Hinata? Why is she acting so different? And how will Neji react to being called a girly-man? Wait until next time to find out! All in the next chapter, 'Of Imps and Pixies'!

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