Spiral Falling

Title: Spiral Falling
Author: BeccaAmon
Genre: AU
Pairings: Naruto x Sasuke x Naruto
Warnings: Shounen ai, yaoi, language
Disclaimer: Standard disclaimers apply.

Chapter 28 – Selfishness

*

Sasuke woke to the feel of chilled feet rubbing against his calves. He moved his legs away only for the feet to follow. Shivering, he allowed the warmth seeking feet to indulge. Seeming satisfied, Naruto tangled his legs around his, pressing onto his side closer. Sasuke stiffened when the boy nuzzled his neck in sleep, an arm sliding and covering his abdomen. Blond hair tickled his cheek. Warm breath against his neck made him swallow guiltily. His body seemed to be recalling all sorts of memories acquainted with Naruto’s. Steadying his breath, he melted into the moment. He savored the softness of the mattress and the hard body covering half of his. Moving an arm around Naruto’s shoulders, he pulled Naruto to him. He sighed into the boy’s hair, closing his eyes and inhaling the familiar, baby powder scent.

A tentative kiss to his neck startled his eyes open. A whoosh of air escaping him when the arm on his abdomen squirmed under his shirt to caress over a nipple. Naruto lifted his head and met his gaze.

“Naruto--”

A pair of lips cut him off, pressing against his firmly. His hands automatically gripped Naruto by the shirt and pulled him on top. Their mouths meshed, teeth clacked and tongues sought partners. Sasuke’s heart beat against his ribcage, strong and excited as a warm, liquid flush spread throughout his body. He opened his mouth wider, wincing when his jaw protested. It throbbed slightly as he recalled Naruto’s sucker punch the night before. Naruto’s hand caressed the abused cheek, at the same time deepening their kiss. A long drawn out moan was pulled from him, the kiss intensifying, curling his toes.

The kiss released slowly. Naruto looked down at him, a smug grin wanting to break out.

“How’s my stomach taste?” Sasuke quipped.

Naruto laughed and punched his shoulder.

Sasuke chuckled, missing that infectious sound. He ignored the urge to rub his shoulder. The punch sort of hurt. Instead, he ran his hands down Naruto’s back, resting them at the small dip below the waist. Playing with the elastic bands of Naruto’s pants, he nipped at the boy’s chin and jaw line, humming as he moved along. Naruto’s hands closed over his neck, fingers moving up to his scalp, tangling with his hair.

“…teeth,” Naruto murmured.

Sasuke hummed, inquiring as his hands dipped lower, fingers smoothing over warm, rounded muscles.

“We should brush our teeth,” Naruto repeated more clearly.

Kissing down Naruto’s neck and then to the side to nip at the juncture between neck and shoulder, Sasuke groaned in protest. “But I don’t want to get up yet. The toothpaste will wake me.” He kind of liked this lazy morning feel. It’s been weeks since he stayed in bed not because he didn’t want to face life, but because he wanted to just be lazy and be with someone, particularly Naruto.

“Well, I’m not kissing you again with that morning breath.” Naruto said, contradicting himself perfectly by giving Sasuke’s lips a small peck.

Sasuke groaned again, just for show.

“And yours taste mountain fresh,” he mocked. “Fine, fine, let’s go.”

This kind of thing, pretending that they hadn’t been separated for a couple of weeks, that he hadn’t hurt Naruto and that he was going to eventually leave Naruto, this pretending thing works when you’re barely awake and just plain horny.

Naruto slowly got off him, stretching like a fox up from a long winter night’s sleep. Sasuke followed soon after, still reluctant on leaving the warm bed.

In the washroom, Naruto had started without him. He was surprised to find his toothbrush was still where he had left it. Picking up the blue brush, he accepted the toothpaste Naruto handed him. Over the counter, in front of the mirror, and side by side, they brushed their teeth. Sasuke watched Naruto spit and rinse, throwing cold water over his face and getting his fringes wet. He watched the curve of the boy’s back as he hunched over, followed the single droplet travel down Naruto’s arm.

Naruto looked up at him, raising a curious brow. Shaking his head, Sasuke finished brushing and washed his face just as Naruto had. Locating the cup his toothbrush originally was placed in, he hesitated, thoughtful as to whether he should bring the brush home or keep it here. Biting his bottom lip, he let the brush fall from his fingers. It clacked against the ceramic walls of the cup and settled beside Naruto’s. Too late now.

Naruto left him to do his business. From the bedroom, Sasuke heard Naruto’s footsteps over the creaking floors, heard the bed groan and then the floor creaked again. Finishing up, he found Naruto by the door. Leaving the washroom to him, Sasuke went back to bed, still reluctant to face the day.

Staring at the ceiling, he traced the patterns and cracks, a habit he never outgrew. Placing his hands behind his head, he sighed, deflating. He wondered what he was still doing in Naruto’s apartment, his bed. He should leave now. How does someone go about breaking something like this up? With a kiss? Some words? He groaned. With a fuck?

Naruto had encouraged him to do what he wanted, to go. He should leave then. But, not yet. Just a little longer and then he would say goodbye.

He heard Naruto approach and smiled as the boy towered over him. Naruto easily straddled his hips, bending over to rest his elbows on the mattress, and trapped Sasuke’s head in between. Blowing a mint-chilled breath toward Naruto, he waited for his kiss. Naruto delivered generously, fingertips drawing random swirls on his scalp. And then he began to rock against Sasuke, maddeningly slow. Sasuke gripped the boy’s hips, grinding up and humming as warm curls churned in his stomach.

Naruto thrust a sinuous tongue into his mouth, wet and deep. Sasuke’s head pressed into the pillow with the pressure, his hips lifting off the mattress to grind against Naruto’s. A hand slipped between his legs, cupping his groin and softly massaging. Sasuke gasped into their mouths, the long fingers moving back and forth helping his half-erect cock to harden fully.

Sliding his hands to cup Naruto’s ass, he ran two fingers in between clothed cheeks. Naruto moved against his hand, gasping as Sasuke rubbed teasingly.

Sasuke pushed himself off the mattress, sitting up and holding Naruto still on his lap. Breaking the kiss, he lapped at Naruto’s lips, bit the bottom one and pulled. He sucked it into his mouth greedily; his eyes open to watch Naruto.

“Sasuke…” Naruto palmed Sasuke’s cock through cloth, stroking the length in quick, controlled jerks.

Sasuke thrust against the hand, gritting his teeth. “More…” He gasped, eyes closing as Naruto stroked faster.

“Whatever you want.” Naruto returned, hands slipping beneath his pants and boxers to wrap around him.

Naruto jerked him off, face buried on his shoulder, warm breath licking up Sasuke’s skin. Sasuke tilted his head back, his awareness being pulled to just one place. He moaned softly, eyebrows furrowing in pleasure, precum leaking over Naruto’s fingers.

Lifting his arm, his hand closed over Naruto’s. He stopped the boy’s movement, his lungs aching for air. He had been so close, but it hadn’t felt right. Something about what Naruto had said felt wrong. But his muddled mind couldn’t even form a coherent sentence, least of all think of what the boy had meant.

Naruto looked up, confused. Mouth about to speak, Sasuke covered it with his. He skimmed kisses over the boy’s cheeks, breathed in the scent of his neck, kissed his favorite part. Lifting Naruto to his knees, Sasuke pushed off the shirt and worried on a nipple. He toyed with it using his tongue, biting lightly to get Naruto to cry out. Sucking and pulling. He kissed down a firm abdomen, slick with sweat. His tongue swiped at the navel, bit into flesh and sucked on it until he left a mark.

Naruto breathed heavily above him, moaning when Sasuke closed his mouth over his crotch. Pulling the thin boxers down, Sasuke lapped at the underside of Naruto’s cock, tonguing the slit and mouthing the tip. He nuzzled the stiff length, caressing the head across his kiss-swollen lips.

Sasuke helped Naruto out of his boxers, kissing any place he could as the boy made himself comfortable. Reaching behind him beneath the pillows, he searched for the lube. He smiled into Naruto’s thigh as his fingers found it. He poured some onto his palm, some of it dripping to his legs, glimmering over slick skin. Sasuke slipped Naruto’s cock into his mouth, taking in what he could as he slid a finger between Naruto’s parted legs.

Naruto’s hands gripped his shoulder, as he pushed a finger in and sucked him off simultaneously. His finger slid in and out, cock throbbing in anticipation. A bead of sweat ran down the side of his face, his mouth accepting more of Naruto.

Grunting, Naruto fucked his mouth. Sasuke could feel the boy’s body straining not to thrust any harder. He slid in a second finger, stretching Naruto to accommodate his size. His fingers plunged deep; curling to brush against Naruto’s prostate. Naruto stiffened immediately, his muscles closing over Sasuke’s fingers.

“Sasuke,” Naruto panted with labored breath, reaching for the lube. “That’s enough…”

Sasuke released Naruto’s cock, tongue licking off precum clinging to his lips.

Naruto reached for his cock, hand dripping with lube. He hissed and ground up as Naruto coated him, and bit the inside of his cheek as he was stroked rapidly. A finger grazed across the slit. “Fuck…”Sasuke sighed, feeling light-headed.

Holding onto Naruto’s waist, he guided the boy onto him. Gasping out loud when he began to enter, hips giving shallow thrusts. Naruto arched his back, fingernails digging into Sasuke’s flesh as he slid inside.

Sasuke kissed Naruto’s open mouth as they adjusted, seconds crawling past until Naruto was ready. He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth. Naruto surrounded him, ate him up. He felt lightheaded and heavy at the same time.

“Move, Sasuke…” His partner groaned, biting his bottom lip. The flesh turned white as he bit harder.

Sasuke swallowed and drove his hips up, pushing in, pulling out. Over and over. His thighs trembled at the strain. His toes shoved against the sheets as pleasure coursed through him. Naruto felt so tight and warm. His body sliding against Naruto’s was pure bliss. Fingers raking down his back, thrilling.

Naruto’s groans pushed him to thrust in and out faster, making sure to hit the spot that made Naruto scream.

They gazed at each other with an opiated warmth. Sasuke’s breath hitched. It was heady; the sweat, the pleasure and pain. The sight of Naruto made him harder, drove him to the brink. Their eyes held onto each other, as they fucked face to face. He palmed Naruto against his abdomen. His other hand, its fingers bit into Naruto’s skin.

Naruto’s breath against his lips was moist, heated and sweet. Sasuke moved forward, kissed Naruto deep, and came into him, hard.

Naruto groaned into their mouths. Sasuke felt him cum on his stomach as he fucked Naruto with his tongue and cock.

It was a sky-kissing elation, while caught in each other’s embrace.

They shuddered against each other, panted as their mouths joined and tongues slid together. Sasuke fell back onto the bed, bringing Naruto with him.

They breathed heavily, limbs shaking and eyes falling close.

Naruto was heavy against him, but Sasuke continued the slow, sated kiss. He held what breath he had and then spent it all on the kiss. If he ended this, time would move again and he would have to move with it. Act with it and begin what he sought out to do.

Naruto was the first one to pull away, roll over and collapse tiredly with his face pressed to the sheets. Their chests rose and fell with each breath, Sasuke’s body tingling still.

“When do you leave?” Naruto asked after they had cooled down and the world no longer spun.

“In a day or two,” Sasuke replied, debating if he should say anything more. If he should make this any harder for both of them. “I have a few more things to pack, and my room arrangement at the student apartments hasn’t been finalized yet.”

“Oh.”

A moment later, Naruto spoke again. “You should have a going away party or something. I’m sure Sakura and Ino would be able to put something together in such short notice.”

Sasuke let the light tone settle over him, ignored the suggestion and just listened to the voice. “Hm, that’s not necessary.”

“What?!” Naruto asked, sitting up. “Of course, it is. They don’t even know. They’ll be pissed if you just left without saying goodbye.”

Sasuke gave a self-deprecating smile, “That’s fine.”

“But--”

“Just drop it, Naruto!” He hadn’t meant to yell. Really. He was just frustrated. His friends’ reactions were the last thing on his mind right now.

“Che,” Naruto sat on the edge of the bed, and got ready to stand.

Sasuke summoned what strength he had and gripped Naruto’s wrist, stopping him from leaving. He moved to sit behind Naruto, his legs and arms trapping Naruto in between.

“Sorry,” Sasuke murmured into Naruto’s shoulder, his arms wrapping around the boy’s waist.

Naruto nodded eventually, and stayed.

Releasing a small sign of relief, Sasuke nuzzled behind Naruto’s ear. He kissed down the nape of the neck and then rested his cheek on it.

Naruto sought his hands and laced it with his, sagging against him.

“I love you.” Sasuke said softly as he closed his eyes. He heard Naruto take a surprised breath, heard his heart beat faster.

Naruto turned in his arms and pushed him to lie back down.

Sasuke stayed in Naruto’s apartment that day. They watched the traffic from Naruto’s balcony, flipped through channels absently. Naruto cooked for him--surprisingly it wasn’t ramen. They played some board games and Naruto laughed at him for his bad luck. He held Naruto under the spray of the shower, kissed him until their lips were swollen. They wandered to bed or the couch, and held each other close, and fucked again and again. Like it was the only thing they could do. The next morning, he and Naruto separated—Naruto went to school and Sasuke went home. Naruto had only taken his palm to kiss and whisper something Sasuke didn’t hear. And then they had parted ways.


Sasuke zipped his suitcase close and looked around. His suitcase was barely filled; he didn’t have that many things to bring. Among his clothes and toiletries was a single picture frame. Strung around his neck was Naruto’s pendant. His train ticket lay on top of his sheets, the coat he planned to wear hung on the back of his chair. He checked the time; he had about an hour until his train left. His father had been busy at work, his mother had already bid him goodbye.

She had spent an afternoon with him. They had talked awkwardly, but still talked. As if spurned by the moment, she told him about her high school days, how she had met his father and fallen in love. She had dreamed of little girls, but got little boys. In a silent voice, with a rare smile on her face, she confessed that in the end she was still happy. And having Itachi come home, she had never been happier. She had told him with a tone of regret, she wished he didn’t have to leave, but wouldn’t dare stop him. She had never been a good mother, she had said, but wished he’d give her another chance.

Sasuke looked over at the box lunch beside his tickets. She had packed it for him, just in case he got hungry during the train ride.

His cab pulled around his driveway, the driver coming out to help him with his luggage. A thin drizzle made the air misty, the sun was covered by grey clouds. He sighed at the warmth inside the cab as he shut the door close. Giving the driver his destination, he sat back and watched his house grow farther and farther away.

Among the passing scenery, he spotted places that had never meant anything to him before, that coaxed a reaction out of him now. He patted the pocket that held his ticket and the letter of acceptance into the school. He took a deep breath and looked away from the window.

The train station wasn’t that far and Sasuke soon found himself riding the escalator to the platform, his luggage in tow. He found a spot in the spacious platform, checked his train’s arrival on the board, and waited.

Minutes passed quickly, the overhead speakers announced his train’s arrival and he saw its light from the distance.

Sasuke closed his eyes, steeled himself and just breathed.


“What are you doing out here?”

Naruto looked up from his comic book, his attention pulled away by the voice. He grinned when he saw who it was and patted the step he sat on.

“Old man, haven’t seen you in awhile.” He greeted.

Jiraiya scratched the back of his neck, grinning widely. “Yeah, well, I’ve been busy.”

“Too busy for your babe-watching?” Naruto teased as the old man took the seat beside him.

Jiraiya scowled, and then leered. “What makes you think there are no babes where I work?”

Naruto laughed and shook his head. The old man never ceased to amuse him. He put his comic away, its pages a little damp from the drizzle. The traffic below them was loud. Everyone drove more carefully when it was wet. Colorful umbrellas littered the sidewalks, held by people in a hurry. The street lights and car lights seemed to ooze, glowing faintly because of the mist.

“So? What are you doing out here?” Jiraiya repeated.

“Seemed like a good day to go out.” Naruto replied, looking up to the grey skies, raindrops catching on his eyelashes.

“Uh huh…” Jiraiya didn’t sound like he believed him. Naruto wouldn’t believe him too.

“Any luck with that girl of yours?” The old man asked as he lit a pipe. The acrid, sweet smell of tabacco rose in the air, teased his nose.

“Uhh no, he left.”

The honk of cars and sounds of downtown filled in the silence between them. Naruto looked onto the passing crowd dully, and thought he might sneeze from the smell of Jiraiya’s pipe.

“Well, that’s too bad. Sounded like you really liked him.” Smoke escaped Jiraiya’s mouth as he talked.

“Yeah,” Naruto felt a stirring in his gut and it made him choke. “I did. I do…Still.”

Jiraiya hummed, understanding. “Maybe you should tell him.”

“But I don’t even know where--”

“Naruto-kun,”

Naruto looked down, at the bottom of the steps Itachi stood.

“How the hell do you always find me?!” He yelled down, making a few people stare.

Jiraiya looked on, puffing away at his pipe.

“Talent,” Itachi smiled that familiar smile he always saw on Sasuke’s face. Naruto wanted to step down and smack it off.

“You said you weren’t going to stay away from him. You want to prove it?”

Naruto frowned, a little confused. Before he could yell back however, Itachi began to walk away. Throwing a confused glance to Jiraiya—the old man shrugged—Naruto nodded goodbye and followed Sasuke’s odd sibling. Itachi had parked along the sidewalk, the other cars moving around it.

Itachi indicated for him to get in, as he himself slid inside. Naruto shrugged, threw caution to the wind and hopped on. The car sped away, cutting through traffic and swerving lanes.

“Hey! Be a little more careful will ya. This is how accidents happen!” Naruto growled, gripping his seatbelt tight.

The asshole actually had the nerve to laugh at him and sped up.

“What do you mean prove myself?” Naruto managed to ask in between reeling from coming too close to a white car and barely dodging another.

Itachi didn’t say anything, just kept driving. The tires screeched when they stopped abruptly, their upper bodies moving forward then back at the momentum.

Itachi rested his hands on the wheels and sighed. Naruto looked outside, eyes widening when he realized where they were. He turned to Itachi, baffled more than before.

“Why are we here?”

“Maybe, I had been selfish at the time. Thinking what didn’t hurt him too much will make him stronger. Maybe I had been mistaken.” Itachi said softly, as he leaned back into his chair, looked on to the wet scenery beyond the glass.

“Platform B--,” Itachi murmured after the silent pause.

Naruto’s eyes widened. He gripped the door’s handle, shoved it open and flew out of the car. He left the door gaping wide as he ran up the slick stairs. He dodged past people and hopped over the ticket gate. Taking the escalator steps two at a time, he almost slipped as he reached the top.

Naruto ran along the platform before a sign caught his eye. “Platform A. Shit!”

He looked across him, to the right platform, to the train leaving the tracks.

“No,no…” Naruto whispered. His voice colored with disbelief. “I don’t want you to go after all. I love you, asshole!” He screamed.

His voice echoed throughout the tunnel, the train’s noise eating it up. He breathed out desperately, fists curled by his sides. He shook his head, bit his lip and berated himself for being the idiot Sasuke had always claimed he was. The more he had wished for Sasuke’s happiness, the more selfish he became. But still, he had wanted him to stay, always had. It’s not selfish to wish for his own happiness, right?

He looked on as the train left, shivered from a gust of wind. Teetering on the edge, he felt a dull throb settle over him. He had been selfish too late.

The end of the train moved out of the way, clearing his view of the platform across. A lone figure stood with his head bowed. Naruto gaped, everything captured in stillness. The figure looked up and across, and everything moved again.

Fearing the scene would prove to be an illusion, Naruto didn’t dare blink. Sasuke pointed to the side. Naruto followed where Sasuke indicated and he found the stairs leading to a floor connecting both platforms.

Nudging his foot to forward, he walked to the steps at the end of the platform. His pace quickened as he got closer. He saw Sasuke do the same. He rushed up the steps, propelled by the realization that Sasuke was still there.

Sasuke met him halfway on the second floor, his luggage by his side.

Naruto tried to catch his breath and flushed at the wide smile he couldn’t suppress.

“Hey,” He greeted.

“…Hey,” Sasuke replied. He looked a bit confused, but a smile tugged at his lips.

“You’re still here.” Naruto said just a bit astonished.

Sasuke shrugged, his hair fluttering in the tunnel’s breeze. “I didn’t want to go.”

Naruto sighed, nodding in understanding and in relief. “As long as it’s what you wanted.”

“Yeah, it is.”

Naruto beamed and took Sasuke’s luggage. He grabbed Sasuke by the arm and started to drag the boy down the stairs. “Good! Then, let’s go! You brother’s probably waiting. Maybe got a ticket too. ‘Cuz he parked at a no parking zone. Let’s hope he does. What a pain in the ass.”

Sasuke stopped walking, forcing Naruto to stop as well. “My brother?”

“Yeah, he drove me here.” Naruto explained.

“Why?”

“Hell if I know. Anyways, let’s go.” He started to walk again.

Sasuke didn’t budge. “Wait. Why are you here?”

Naruto stiffened, recalled what he had screamed in public and flushed. “Uhh….”

By Sasuke’s reaction, he probably hadn’t heard. Good. “Umm, no reason.”

“What? You’re lying!” Sasuke accused.

Naruto dragged them out of there and kept dodging Sasuke’s questions. He hugged Sasuke quickly, smiling into his shoulder, and then let go before the boy even had time to react.

Itachi did get a ticket, and Naruto thought overall that it had been a good day.

TBC