My collection of Naruto / ? pairings

Naruto / Deidara / Zetsu (both female)

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto *pulls away the paper fans with ASUMA IS DEAD! WOOHOO!!!* I wish to extend my condolences to everyone who liked Sarutobi Asuma… *Muffles away a banner with: ASUMA IS DEAD, KURENAI IS FREE!!!* and would like to offer my sincere condolences to Yuuhi Kurenai *removes a banner which says: NARUTO IS FREE TOO, GO GET HIM KURENAI!* and would like to offer some mental support to the rabid Asuma fangirls *grabs a rocket launcher, loads a rocket into it, then points at the rabid Asuma fans, and fires*

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Uzumaki Naruto generally wasn’t surprised about anything. When a girl came in front of him, he paused, looking her once over, then his eyes widened at the attire that she wore. A black top coupled with black pants was covering her up, and she looked at him with her cyan eyes blinking slightly. He looked at her as she blushed as she knew he looked at her, with her speaking up: “ You’re a shinobi, aren’t you?” he nodded, seeing a hint of a hitai-ate under the back pants, near the knee. “ You’re one too, aren’t you?”

Deidara nodded. “ You’re also a Jinchuriki, aren’t you?” Naruto’s brow furrowed. “ Why do you know?” Deidara licked her lips. “ I’ve always had a fascination with powerful men…”

She hid the fact that she had been made into a female by her mother at the tender age of 1 and a half, though she didn’t really make too much of a problem of it. She had heard that she had been born male. But that her mother was a spiteful bitch, which she admitted to herself of course, having lived with her mother, and that her mother had turned her into a fully working female thanks to an elixir that would make the genitals go 180 degrees, turning male genitals into female genitals and vice versa. The idea that it must have been painful came to mind, and she could faintly remember a sting of pain, everything that she remembered was the pain. She could keep her voice low, since the genitals had been affected only, with breasts growing thanks to the extra hormonal influx from her body thinking it was female.

It was really something that you could hide your gender by just placing a few strands of hair over one eye, then speak with a voice that is deep and male, while you really have breasts and a vagina to go with it. She had been assigned to a plant guy this time, to make sure that there wouldn’t be someone to cross their plans in the area… about the exact gender of the guy, she didn’t know, since the plant covered up pretty much of the body… and it looked pretty creepy with one side of the voice speaking in robotic voices, while the other seemed to be more human… and then the colours of black and white that seemingly had been inked on the man’s face… ugh… she hated that…

She looked at him, finding him to be cute, and knowing from the pictures that this was the Jinchuriki of the Kyuubi no kitsune. She found him cute, and it was by luck that she had strayed across him. “So, you’ve got a fascination with powerful men…” he repeated, looking at her, with which she got a pretty good idea… she could have him in a good way, without him going to blab about her being an Akatsuki member to that old pervert she had seen. The mouths on her hands seemed to itch a bit, so she scratched them for a moment, making sure not to reveal them too much. She looked around, it being quite the isolated spot, with nobody around.

“ So, what’s your name?” she asked, looking at him with her eyes sparkling slightly, though her left eye was hidden under the lock of hair.

She looked to be pretty hot to him, certainly a step up from those whores that Ero-sennin usually had relationships with… and he wanted to feel loved, and this girl seemed to hold no prejudice against him, but acknowledging his power, saying that she liked powerful men… “Uzumaki Naruto… And your name?” he asked, looking at her, with her licking her lips as he just looked so adorable. “ Deidara… Say, would you be interested in coming with me to my hotel room? You look so… adorable…” she was 18, and older then him, most probable, though she could easily pass for a 16 year old, had she put up a henge or something. He looked to be around 14, and a perfect prey for her.

He looked at her, blinking, thinking this to be some macabre joke from god. “ Come with you?” she nodded, coming up to him, grabbing him by the arm and saying: “ Just some casual sex, nothing more, nothing less… I just hope that that grumpy old bastard hasn’t returned yet…” he sent her a glance, to which she answered: “ His name is Zetsu, and we were originally assigned a mission to quell the unrest in the area… but he’s gone off, the prick.” Naruto nodded, and let himself be led to the hotel where she stayed, which coincidentally was the same hotel that he and Ero-sennin stayed in.

Well, this is quite the surprise… he thought as he entered the room, only to see a bit of a mess, with some pairs of pants being strewn all over the room, Deidara muffling something away quickly, then turned to him. “ I guess you’re a virgin, aren’t you? Well then… enjoy yourself…” and she slowly began to strip, taking her top off first, making a bit of a show of it as she slowly pulled it off, making him look at her with a bit of surprise, though it lessened swiftly and he began to enjoy the show she was putting on, the breast bindings coming off soon after. He wondered why she had bound her chest, though he suspected that her partner was not quite informed as to her feminine state: “Doesn’t he know you’re a female, or don’t you like to wear a bra?” she looked at him, then shook her head; “ It’s not something I go flaunting around. I just wore this so I could get out anonymously… it’s a bit tough when a guy can recognise you because you wear clothes that cover most of your body…” she absently stroked her hair, slightly messing it up, causing her eye to come into view, plucking the scope from it, then flicking it into the clothes pile next to her, then started to work on the lower part of her clothes. She looked at him, looking at the sign of his arousal in his pants, smiling softly as she knew the drill, knowing how the female body worked really well, having seen some of the erotic Doujins that most men used to read, and smiled. “ Come on, unclothe yourself…”

Naruto obeyed, not wanting to anger this girl, who had so graciously offered to take his virginity from him, almost ripping off his clothing. He looked at her as he stood there naked, walking slowly towards her, making nary but a sound as she gasped slightly, then forced a slight smile.

He’ll break me with that thing… and it’s so hard…Naruto was after all a normal guy, whose hormones had been raging through his body for some time. He looked at her, his hard-on making her gasp slightly, while she kept herself in control from praying to whatever deity that listened that Zetsu wouldn’t come in…

Said plant was currently engaged in doing its laundry, humming a cheerful tune, while absently removing the bra from the line, to put into its pack reserved for the underwear of choice… it could move between male and female, like a plant, which had both male as well as female parts, though Zetsu preferred to look like a male, while having female Genitalia. Also, his robotic personality was female, and seemingly more sympathetic then her human personality which was male.

Deidara lay there on the bed, Naruto on top of her., they had settled in this position because it would be easy for him to thrust inside of her. He had entered her slowly, causing her to whimper most uncharacteristically as she could feel her hymen breaking, before she was able to feel the pleasure of his cock entering her. The feeling that it made, was better then the time that she orgasmed when masturbating. She looked into his blue eyes, hoping to see something of compassion within them, but he didn’t even reply to her, wanting to feel her better.

He could feel her hot sheath around his cock, clinging to it like a vine. “ This feels so good.” He hoarsely spoke, looking at her as he thrust deeper into her, making her feel his cock inside her, with her speaking softly; “ Damn… I’ve taken your virginity, while I gave you mine… how can this feel so good?” she asked herself out loud, looking at him with her cyan eyes shining brightly. She had no intention of bringing him in, since that was Itachi and Kisame’s job, but she could feel some sort of connection forming between them, making her feel strangely attached to Naruto, who seemed to be enjoying the treatment pretty well.

The feeling of a man hugging her, like Naruto was doing now, made her feel happy and secure, even though he was hurting her slightly, her pussy bleeding a bit because of the hymen being broken. The feeling was pretty good, after the pain of course. She looked into his eyes, making contact with her cyan and his blue, which seemed to lure her deeper into the deep recesses of his mind… so absorbed she was in his eyes, that she didn’t hear the door open, Zetsu stepping inside and freezing at the moans that she was making. The plant-creature looked at Deidara, recognising her instantly as Naruto rolled over, giving her more movement space, something that he had heard about.

“So, you were female…” the robotic voice spoke, and Deidara’s attention snapped towards Zetsu, a deep blush growing on her face. “ Zetsu… I didn’t mean…” “ I’m glad for that… otherwise, I’d have to keep my own femininity hidden as well…” and the Akatsuki cloak parted, to reveal a lot of plant mass, the huge Venus fly-trap still being quite discernable, but with it parting to reveal slender legs, which looked to be well shaven, then revealing absolutely nothing to be worn, a hairless pussy, the one side of her body being black, the other white, and then breasts which looked to be big, like Tsunade’s… The plant was attached to her back, giving her no freedom, but she could meld with the floor, as showed as she melted into the floor, then laid herself on the bed: “ Well, it seems like we’re both female now… let’s see what that guy you caught can do…”

Naruto was pretty surprised to see the female, with the Kusagakure hitai-ate around her neck look at him and he gulped as Deidara raised herself vertically, looking at Naruto with eyes that seemed to carry a hint of joy within them. “Well, let’s show you what two women can do… but first, I want to come…” and she started to gyrate her groin with his, making him groan softly, making her feel his cock within her move slightly, then could feel her pussy become so wet that she seemed to be able to feel everything so good that it made her feel like she had been made from a gel-like substance, as an orgasm washed over her.

“Well then, let’s see how he handles me! Get off her Deidara and I’ll show him how a real slut handles things…” the black side of her face had a more colourful vocabulary then the white side, which was generally considered to be her more human side, which the black made the more animalistic side. Deidara got off Naruto’s cock, Zetsu climbing on top of him and immediately beginning to work him like a pro, squeezing his cock with her pussy muscles, making him groan at the expertise that she showed. “This woman has seen more action then you could ever fathom… and the best part is, I can switch between male and female…” and while Zetsu did not do that, Deidara could see that she was telling the truth. After all, why lie to a person you had to work with for a while?

“What’s his name? I’d liekt o know just who I’m having sex with… just for the record…” Naruto looked uncomfortable, the question being a bit on the unsafe side, but Deidara replied; “Itachi and Kisame’s target… but that doesn’t mean that we can’t have some fun with him…” Zetsu smiled softly; “I always thought of you as a weird dude… now I k now for sure that you are one hell of a weird girl…” Deidara was almost insulted at that. “ You just keep that opinion to yourself, please… I won’t have this argument with you at the time, not with him in the room.”

Naruto was now the focal point of attention to both women, with Zetsu having stopped trying to get him off by muscle control alone. “Seems like our little man-whore needs a bit more of encouragement before he would be able to make sure that his cum will flood my pussy… it’s a blessing that I can’t get pregnant, so I’m not too bothered by it… after he’s done, you can clean him, or I could do it…” Naruto looked at her and then suddenly felt Zetsu’s muscles tighten once again around his cock, making him groan slightly as the pleasure hit him, making him feel slightly light headed, the feeling moving through his bones and feet, making him feel the bits of ministration that she endowed him with, giving a low groan though, the feeling of her pussy clamping around his cock to be good enough o make him come finally.

When his semen gushed into her pussy. Zetsu could only sigh deeply, then look at Deidara and said; “ He’s probably driven by lust, like all men… tell me, what do you think is attractive on him? His penis or his looks?” Deidara looked at Zetsu for a moment, then said; “Both, I guess. The feeling that he gives me is really nice when he wants to please me, making me feel happy that he’s around and stuff like that.” He looked at her, coming down from his bliss as he felt Zetsu climb off him, making him shiver briefly, not wanting to experience the sensation once again, since it felt like a thousand spiders had crawled over his body just now…

“Eh, don’t I get a say in this?” he dared to ask, with the two ladies looking at him like he were mad, with him shaking his head slightly. “I guess not…” “Licking time, Deidara-chan.” Deidara nodded and said; “ Keep still Naruto-kun… we’ll lick it clean for you…”

And they set to work. Naruto experienced the sensation of their tongues, making soft groans as Deidara went first, taking his limp cock in her hand and then licking it slowly, letting her tongue go over it, making her feel the texture of his cock. She could taste Zetsu’s and Naruto’s juices, with a faint trace of her own. The feeling that there would be cum coming out soon welled up within her, and she shoved herself to the side to allow Zetsu to sit next to her, making sure that they both got a side, with Zetsu, who wasd the more experienced one, sucking on one side, licking it occasionally while Deidara kept on flicking her head over the tip of his cock, never letting it stray from there. There seemed to be something that was out of the ordinary, Naruto thought, as he looked at the two ladies lavishing attentions at his cock, making him feel so damned good, Deidara’s blonde locks making his blood begin to boil slightly, coupled with the look on Zetsu’s face, which seemed to be hormones mixed with something called lust, then stirred, shaken and turned into passion. Zetsu was now licking him most furiously, and the effect was not long to come, as he groaned deeply and came, his cum coming out of it slowly, giving both women a good dose on their nose, with Zetsu catching some in her hair, and on the black side of her face, with Deidara getting some of it into her long hair. They looked at each other, and then giggled at the same time, making Naruto wonder if there was some inside joke between the two of them…

“I guess that it’s going to be a parting way now, Naruto-kun… We can’t be around you too much, or we’ll get the leader on top of us, something that wouldn’t be nice…” Deidara spoke, looking at Zetsu with a bit of a blush on her face. “Yes, the guy would be not so nice when he discovers that we fucked this cute Jinchuriki into submission…” Naruto was not so amused, as he felt like he had been used. “What?” that was the only thing he said, before he was kicked out of the room, his clothes on, with the advice to get the hell to his room, stay there for a few days.

“Ero-sennin… I got kicked out of some girl’s room…” he said once he stood in front of the man, who had a lecherous look on his face; “ Well, what did they look like?” Naruto shook his head, knowing that Jiraiya was going to bite his tongue from the announcement. “They wear Akatsuki cloaks, one of them has a hand with a mouth in it, and the other looks like a plant crossed with a guy, though that’s just a cover-up…” Jiraiya’s eyes widened, before he shook his head; “Nah, you got to be kidding me… I’ve scanned the area, and haven’t seen any Akatsuki here, so you must have gotten one of the hot chicks in the lobby, didn’t you? Maybe that purple-haired one…” Naruto shook his head, knowing that Jiriaya had dismissed it as some sort of weird fragment of his mind…

One and a half year later, he met the two of them once again, in the mission to retrieve Gaara. “ Don’t hurt the blonde too much, she knows me, and would probably be unable to hurt me too much. DEIDARA-CHAN GET THE HELL DOWN HERE, WE WON’T HURT YOU!”

Deidara looked at Naruto, having a big sweat drop on the back of her head at the loud voice, which probably could have been heard in Sunagakure, then shook her head and decided to abide to the request, since she didn’t want to blow up such a sweet piece of ass like Naruto.

Kakashi nearly fainted from surprise as he saw the clay bird land, eject Gaara’s body, then Deidara kneeling slowly, looking at Naruto with a slightly annoyed look on her face; “Its because I like you a lot that I am surrendering, so… just execute me or take me with you, I don’t care…” he was saved from answering, as Zetsu appeared, dragging Deidara into the foilage, then disappearing with her. “So much for getting 2 Akatsuki members to join Konoha…” Kakashi just looked weirdly at him, shrugging, though being a bit pissed at having one of them escape his grasp…

Three weeks later, Naruto was tending to his small garden, weeding it until a particularly large weed seemed to grow behind him, revealing Zetsu’s caped form, with the woman holding Deidara in a safe grip. “We’re back, Naruto-kun, and we’ve left Akatsuki… just to be with you…” Naruto turned around, looking at them with tears in his eyes. “You’ve come for me? Thank you so much… I’ll have to get you to Tsunade-baachan immediately…”

Zetsu raised an eyebrow, then looked at Deidara and said; “I guess we’ll have to make a nice impression on the Hokage… Deidara, would you mind coming with me into the ground, and then we’ll follow Naruto-kun, and I’ll henge into a potted plant, then you’ll hand me to Tsunade, I make a grand entrance by making myself appear from the plant… and Deidara, you could be a clay object…” Deidara nodded, finding it a good idea for a prank, and with a small hand motion, the hand on her left side spat out a glob of clay, which became an elaborate vase, which she then handed to Naruto, hengeing into the same thing, but keeping herself quite hidden. Zetsu just shrugged, transforming into a small potted plant, put into a nearby pot.

“Baachan, I got a plant and a vase for you!” he stormed into her office, bbursting with joy as he saw one of his favourite people, who looked up from the paperwork, and he placed the vase and the plant on her desk, then stepped back to watch the show. “ Arigatou, Naruto-kun…”

She didn’t get much further, as the vase exploded, revealing Deidara standing there on the desk, before hopping off, standing next to Naruto, waiting for Zetsu. “Yo Hokage-sama! I’m Deidara, one of Naruto’s current girlfriends, and most permanently a girlfriend, because we’re not letting go… I want to become a shinobi of Konoha, like my boyfriend, so will you let me?” Tsunade was still stunned enough by the explosion, and Naruto looked at the potted plant, before the huge gargantuan Venus fly-trap appeared, and snapped at Tsuande, jerking her from her daze, and making her fall back with a thump, her eyes wide from the scare that she had just gotten, only getting up in time to see Zetsu standing next to Naruto, with a grin on the woman’s face: “My name is Zetsu, and I want to join Konoha. I possess information about Akatsuki, being their oi-nin for most of their existence. And I’m also one of Naruto’s girlfriends…” Tsunade rubbed her temples, thinking about the pro’s and the cons of having Akatsuki members in Konoha, even after they had left the organization…

“You’re accepted.” Naruto said, predicting what she was going to say perfectly, causing her to nod dumbly. “You’ll live in my house, since you don’t have one of your own…” the two ladies nodded, before Naruto took charge and they all went to his house for some… entertainment…

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Now this was bad… I feel like my head is coming apart, I’m a bit sick at the moment, so that’s to blame… I am also having my holidays, so I want to enjoy them a bit, so I’m giving you 2 choices for an update.

Either one with Kurenai* gets the fans with: GO GET HIM KURENAI AND DRAIN HIS BALLS DRY! Out.*

Or one with Tsunade* smiles softly, then goes to make some coffee*

I hope you pick well… for next chapter, I’d like to have… 920 reviews… think you can do that? If you get 1000 reviews, I’d be having the most reviews on site, I guess…

So, please review…

Also, tell me if AFF.net can handle more then 1 MB of text... i might be releasing a document with all the stories behind each other, for easy scrolling or something like that...

but still....

Please Review!