His Undying Will

It was another spring day out and it was days like this that made Sasuke appreciate the warmth of the sun in the spring. He sat outside his house thinking about his life. He did that a lot - thinking to himself - he was supposed to be doing his homework.

Shikamaru was supposed to come over soon, too. It seemed odd for him to have a friend over. He just wanted to have company - he hoped that his brother wouldn't be rude.

He bit his lower lip at the thought of how jealous his brother would get of others taking up his time. He supposed it was because he thought of himself as a father figure now. At least that was what one of his teachers had told him.

That was when the doorbell rang and it brought Sasuke from his thoughts. He perked up immediately and smiled as he ran towards the door. He didn't usually have company over which was the explination for his excitement that Shikamaru was coming to spend the night.

"Coming!"

He opened the door and smiled as he saw his brown haired friend. He wore a black t-shirt and a pair of blue jeans. Not the typical school uniform that he had seen him in consisting of a white shirt and green and blue pladded pants.

It was a rather disgusting outfit that Sasuke would not want to be seen in public with. He was glad that he could take it off after school and have the freedom of creativity with his clothing.

Being at a very expensive private school Sasuke wasn't surprised that he had to wear a uniform. He had moved to Konoha because kids at his old school were picking on him for being weird. At the private school however, Sasuke was well accepted and he had many friends.

He wondered what the difference was. He would have to remember to think about this later.

"Hey, what's up?" he heard Shikamaru say as he walked into the Uchiha household.

The house was rather clean. Too clean for Shikamaru's taste. He looked around and noticed that there were flowers in the middle of the table in the kitchen.

The living room was the first thing that you would see when walking in. The next was the kitchen. To the side was a staircase that lead to the upstairs bedrooms and bathroom. To the left of the staircase was an office room with a computer desk and a working computer.

It was a nice house nevertheless. Shikamaru was sure he would be able to get used to coming over and spending time with Sasuke. He had heard from Kiba what had happened with his parents. It seemed he was trying to reach out to others in this way.

"Hey, how are you? Can I get you anything?" he asked and looked down, "Are you hungry?"

Sasuke was told that it was always a good thing to be a good host to a guest. That was what his brother had told him. He was a bit surprised to hear that Itachi would let someone come home on a school night, though.

He supposed Shikamaru was an exception though since he had very good grades and was unlikely to cause Sasuke any trouble while being there. Itachi didn't particularly like Kiba, though. He knew about the drugs and what he did when he partied with his friends, and he didn't want Sasuke around that scene.

"Oh, don't worry about me. Great place." he said and walked into the room where Itachi was speaking to one of his business partners.

Itachi was a lawyer. He had gone to law school in hopes of making life easier for both him and Sasuke. Now that he had a job as a lawyer they had more than enough money to take care of one another.

"So, what are we gonna do?"

Sasuke thought a minute and smirked. "You like video games?"

"Who doesn't?" Shikamaru replied.

Sasuke walked up the stairs and made a right down the hall and Shikamaru followed. On the left of the hallway there was a door to his room and he opened it, walking inside. Sasuke's room was clean as well.

His bed was very large for someone Sasuke's age. He had a night stand by the bed and a television in front of the bed. The bed leaned against the wall with the head facing the wall and the end facing the television in front of it.

The raven haired boy's room was particularly tidy and it made the other rooms look messy compared to it. Shikamaru wondered about this as he looked at the collection of video games that were kept in neat stacks against a shelf next to the television set. He smirked when he saw the Resident Evil III game.

"Ever play Resident Evil?" he asked as he pulled out the game and handed it to Sasuke.

"I've already beat that one." he said with a smile.

Shikamaru gasped. "No way!"

"Totally. It took about three hours but I finally beat it on the first day that I got it. You can play if you want though." he said as he turned on the PS2, and handed Shikamaru the controller.

As the game started, Sasuke leaned against the end of his bed and looked over at Shikamaru. He was smart, cute of course, but he would never think of Sasuke as anything more than a friend. Wait a second! Why was he thinking like this?

Did his brother have this much of an effect on him that he would try to seduce his friends, too? No, that was meant to be kept a secret just between him and his brother. No one was supposed to find out about it.

About an hour passed with the two boys in the room playing video games. Sasuke laughed when Shikamaru got angry at the video game when he lost a match against a zombie. Or when he died after falling off a ledge.

It was odd, but happiness seemed to swell within him as he hung out with his friend.

A knock sounded against a closed door.

"Sasuke, you need to get a shower in before you go to bed." he reminded him.

"Oh yeah, Shika, I'll be right back." he said before he grabbed a pair of pajama's and made his way to the bathroom that was in the center of the hallway, almost next to his room.

"Sasuke."

"Yeah?"

He turned to look at his older brother with a raised eyebrow.

"You haven't said anything have you?"

Sasuke shook his head.

"Good."

"I love you, anki." he said, and smiled as he went into the bathroom.

"I love you, too." he said with a smirk as he watched Sasuke go into the bathroom.

He allowed the water to run until it was warm, but not scalding as he sat his clothes down on the floor. Underneath the bathroom sink were the towels and Sasuke pulled one out sitting it on top of his pj's. He paused for a moment and looked in the mirror.

He honestly didn't like what he saw staring back at him. It was a lonely, broken child with no one to care for him. Sure, he had his brother, but he seemed oddly attracted to him.

Something was telling Sasuke that it was a bad thing to feel that way about his brother. Maybe once Itachi was in bed, Sasuke would ask Shikamaru about it. Shikamaru was very smart, after all.

After making his decision he smiled and turned on the shower, stepping into the bathtub and closing the curtain as he did so. He allowed the water to pour against his back, and felt very good after he had done so. He lathered his hair and his body as he stood there in the shower. The soap smelled like oranges.

The orange smell reminded him of his english teacher, Naruto. He seemed exceptionally worried about him lately. It was as though he knew something about Sasuke that Sasuke didn't even know about himself.

Perhaps his teacher would be someone he could talk to. Of course he would want ananemity. He didn't want his brother to get angry with him for telling someone about their secret. He just felt a sense of dread, like it was meant to be told.

Like he SHOULD tell someone.

He bit his lip so hard that blood trickled down his lip and onto his chin, down into the running water and into the drain. He stared at the drain before he allowed the water to wash the soap and shampoo out of his hair and off his body. The raven then turned the shower off, got his towel, and wiped himself off before getting dressed.

"Good night, brother!" he said as he made his way towards his room.

By the time that he had gotten out of the shower, Shikamaru had already beaten Resident Evil and had gone onto another game. Sasuke smirked - the kid WAS smart. He could figure out things quickly but only if he thought it was a game.

That made him more interesting to Sasuke.

"'Tachi said we gotta go to bed soon," he said as he sat on his bed.

"I'll be done in just a minute." he said and pushed the buttons on the controller a few more times.

"You already beat Resident Evil and now you're on another game? You really are a genius." he said with a laugh.

"I'm not that smart."

"PaLEAse," Sasuke said and looked over at him, "You got the highest scores on all the exams last year. You have to be!" he told him.

"Oh c'mon, stop flattering me!" he said and laughed as he finished the game.

They both lay in the bed together staring at the ceiling. Sasuke wanted to tell him, but he was too afraid that his brother would find out.

He would wait until another time.