I See You

IV.

It took a lot of nerve, but Genma decided to it would be best visit Mizuki in person instead of sent him a message. He had one hell of a crazy story to tell the man, and he had no idea how Mizuki was going to take it. He waited until dinnertime, figuring his best shot was to get the white-haired chūnin to agree to come with him tonight. Genma definitely didn't want to give him the chance to sleep on the whole thing!

Genma was lost for a while before he managed to find the apartment building Mizuki lived in. It was in an affluent area of downtown, close to designer boutiques and markets selling fancy imported food. Genma had never really checked this area out. He decided that he didn't really like it. It was a very different side of Konoha.

He hoped Mizuki would let him enter his apartment, but if he didn't, the special jōnin had other ways to persuade him. Genma was going to have to do some fast talking. His only saving grace was being armed with details about Iruka that only Mizuki would know. He had no choice but to make the man believe him. It was Iruka's only chance.

The man who opened the door to the spacious pent house apartment, Genma had to admit, was very good-looking...It seemed like he had just come back from work. He was still with his chūnin uniform and hitae-ate, that if it was backwards, would look like Genma's. But yep, the special jōnin still hated him. But he had to be nice and get Mizuki warmed up before he hit him with the big bomb.

"Hello, Mizuki-sensei. I'm Shiranui Genma. I work as a teacher in the academy, just like you."

Mizuki looked a bit wary. "I know you. You're a jōnin, right?" Genma nodded. "What brings you here Shiranui-san, did something happen?"

Genma shook his head. "No, no. Nothing happened. It's just I bought a house with my friend. And I recently found out that before it used to belong to you, I just wanted to talk a little bit about it."

They chit chatted for a minute, but Genma could see that Mizuki wasn't quite buying his story. In fact, he could feel the subtle shift towards the door. He knew the chūnin wanted to try to get rid of him. He had to stop it, or the next thing he knew he'd be out in the hallway and no closer to helping Iruka.

Genma took a deep breath. "Mizuki-sensei, I haven't been one hundred percent honest with you." He didn't want to pause very long and give Mizuki a chance to kick him out, so he pushed through. "Yes I live in your old house and there's something in that place that brought me to you."

"Shiranui-san, you aren't here about the Halloween murder are you? I already told everything I know to Hokage-sama." Mizuki looked angry. The subtle push towards the front door became much more noticeable.

"Mizuki-sensei... The truth is, I'm here because there's someone we both know, and love, who desperately needs your help."

Mizuki froze. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about Iruka."

Mizuki didn't even hesitate. "I'm sorry being rude but I think you need to leave," He choked out. Even hearing the name seemed too much for him.

"Wait…I know this sounds crazy but I'm serious. I know Iruka. He's real. I can prove it to you."

"Umino Iruka has been dead for five years."

"Five years tomorrow," Genma confirmed. Mizuki's face twisted. Genma imagined that Halloween must not be his favorite day. The chūnin started pushing him towards the door. He had to act quickly "Iruka loved classic music.." Genma blurted out. "he loved ramen, but you hate it.. You told him how much you liked his hair down, but you didn't like when the others saw how beautiful he looked, so he decided to keep it on a ponytail and only show it to you, when you guys were alone. You liked to kiss his scar, because it made him crinkling his nose and you always found it cute." Mizuki was starting to believe him. Genma hit him with his ace. "The first time you kissed him was in that house, in your room. You were telling him how much you want to become a jōnin and then you kissed him." Genma hoped to hell the man remembered that.

He could see Mizuki's eyes widen. He remembered. He also knew there was no way anyone but him and Iruka had known those things. Mizuki walked over to a chair in the entrance and sank into it. Genma was kind of afraid he was having a heart attack or something.

"Iruka," He murmured. The pain was so obvious in his face. Whatever bad choices Mizuki made, he had loved Iruka. Probably still did.

"Mizuki...sensei, Iruka needs your help. Will you come with me?" Genma could barely believe it, but Mizuki nodded. "Thank you so much for believing me."

..👻👻👻..

They were sitting in Genma's room waiting for Iruka, Genma on his bed, Mizuki on the armchair in the corner. Genma could tell Mizuki hated being in the house, even more in this room. The man kept looking at a spot on the floor. Genma was pretty sure that's the last place he had ever seen Iruka, but he didn't want to even think about it.

At midnight, Iruka appeared as usual. He smiled a big sunny smile "Hey Genma," he said before reaching out to brush Genma's cheek in what had become an achingly familiar gesture. He froze when he heard the shocked intake of breath that came from Genma's easy chair. Iruka turned slowly. He wavered for a second before becoming solid again. "Mizu?"

The man was obviously older, but there was no mistaking that face. Iruka's mouth dropped wide open. Mizuki looked like he was having a hard time breathing. He opened and closed his mouth a few times before he finally spoke. "Oh God, Iruka. Are you really here? This-this not some kind of illusion, right?"

He looked at Genma, and the special jōnin only shook his head. "Believe me, he's real... I also thought he wasn't a ghost at first."

Mizuki looked back at Iruka. "I..ru..ka. Please forgive me."

"Why did you do it, Mizuki? Why did you say those things?" Iruka was crying. Mizuki reached out towards him, but Iruka flinched away.

"God, 'Ruka, I don't know." Genma cringed at the endearment, hating it. He wanted to tell Mizuki that Iruka was his now but he knew that would sound insane, so he just stay there chewing his senbon nervously. "I panicked. I was so insecure and I didn't want the guys to think less of me, so I just put the blame on you and took off. I had no idea they would do what they did."

Iruka was getting angry. "You had to know, Mizuki. That's the way things were back then. They weren't just going to leave it alone. They were your friends, you…you should know…you let them kill me, Mizuki."

Mizuki looked down at the floor, shame filling his face. He was crying, reliving the guilt and horror of that night. "I was coming back to apologize, to tell the truth. To tell you and anyone else who wanted to hear that I loved you. When I got to the room and saw those guys on top of you I started screaming at the top of my lungs, trying to rip him off of you, but it was too late. You were gone." Iruka shook his head slowly, processing what Mizuki had told him. Mizuki looked a little desperate. "Iruka, you've got to know that I have thought about that night every single day my entire life. I loved you. That's the truth."

Iruka's face was filled with pain. "I know you did, Mizu. I loved you too. But I guess it just wasn't enough."

Iruka started walking towards the door to the room. As he walked, he slowly disappeared.

'Oh my god, is that it? Am I never going to see Iruka again?' Genma started to panic, but then realized he had an emotional chūnin sitting in his room crying, and he needed to get him the hell out of there so he could break down in peace.

"Mizuki-sensei?" Genma whispered, afraid to upset him more. "Mizuki?" He repeated. "Thank you so much for coming. It was important for Iruka to see you." Mizuki wasn't responding to his words, so Genma went over to him, and put his arm around him, shuffling him to the door. "I will take you to the door."

When they got to the entryway, Genma heard Mizuki laughing. "Mizuki-sensei? Are you all right?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine...You know, I think I might be. I've been waiting to apologize to him for five years. It felt good to finally be able to say it." finally Mizuki spoke.

Genma honestly didn't care about Mizuki's feelings, he was just being polite. "I think it helped Iruka to hear it, too."

Mizuki smiled a half way smile. "I hope so. If I can do even one thing for him, then maybe I can earn a little bit of forgiveness."

Genma didn't say anything. What can you say to someone who has felt the guilt of his actions weighing him down for five years? But still something was bugging him about Mizuki. Something was telling that Mizuki wasn't feeling guilty at all. But Genma pushed this thought to the back of his mind.

Mizuki said his goodbye and Genma closed the door. He needed to get back to the room to see if Iruka was really gone. He didn't want him to be gone, but he knew it was the best thing for Iruka.

Heart pounding, he went back to his room, unlocked the door terrified that he would find nothing on the other side. He nearly cried with relief when he saw Iruka sitting there waiting for him. "Iruka" He began, but Iruka put his finger on his lips to shush him.

"Just lay down next to me. I want to watch you fall asleep."

Genma had a million things to say and was nowhere near sleep, but he did as Iruka asked. He wanted to make Iruka happy. He took his shirt and his jeans off and lay down on the bed next to Iruka.

..👻👻👻..

Genma woke up to find Iruka sitting in the same chair where the jōnin saw him in the first time. He was facing the window, looking at the sunrise.

"Iruka!" Genma whispered.

Iruka looked at him and smiled. "It's Halloween. In a few hours it will be exactly five years since I died."

Genma felt a sharp pain on his chest. "You know, I thought last night we finally gave you what you needed. I figured you'd be gone by now, but you're still here somehow and now I don't want you to go. I know it's selfish. I'm just going to miss you so much."

Iruka stood up and sat on the bed beside him. "Genma, that's not selfish. I don't want to go either...at least I don't want to leave you. But I can't stay stuck in this room forever, and you can't spend your life talking to someone who isn't really there." He sighed as he caressed Genma's cheek. "I know you, jōnins, are a little bit unbalanced, but I never saw one talking all the time with someone who isn't really there."

Genma laughed, then he stopped and looked sadly at the chūnin. "Iruka, you can't go. Don't you know? I'm falling in love you! I don't care if no one else can see you. You make me happy." He couldn't believe he had actually said it out loud.

"You love me?" Iruka looked incredulous.

"Yes, I love you." Genma was almost angry and he felt a little irrational. "Do you want me to go shout it in the street, cause I will. I'm not Mizuki. I'll tell everyone I'm in love with a beautiful ghost, and he's the best thing in my life."

Iruka started laughing. But then the laugh turned into tears. "I love you too, my amazing, handsome and lunatic Gen. Please don't go running around telling people you're in love with a ghost. I don't want you getting carted off in a straight jacket." Iruka smiled sadly. "You know, I get it now. You're what I was missing all along, Genma. I didn't need you to help me, I just needed you. I needed to feel what it was like to really be loved with no conditions. You did that for me."

Genma tried to hold the hand that was caressing his face, but he he ended up holding nothing, but his own face. Iruka looked at him in wonder. He reached up to hold Iruka's face and kiss him. But his cheek was tingly and translucent, more than the usual. Genma's eyes widened in horror. "Iruka, no!" He exclaimed. "It's not midnight yet. What's..."

"I don't know, I'm not ready yet, it's still early." Iruka's eyes were full of the fear.
The chūnin was fading quickly, not even as solid as he had been when they first met. His face looked panicked.

Genma felt like he was dying. How could the universe do this? Find someone for him to love and have that love be the reason they left forever? He wanted to scream at the stars.

"Genma, I don't want to go, I really don't! I'm scared...Please help me…Gen…" Iruka sounded distant. He reached out to touch the jōnin, but his hand slipped right through Genma's body. He was nothing more than a slight glow.

"Iruka, no! I love you!" Genma cried, even though he couldn't see Iruka at all. He knew Iruka was still there, if only for a second more.

"...love you…too..." It was a far off whisper, barely discernible in the air.
And then there was nothing.

Tbc