Fading Scars

This is an Alternate Universe fic set perhaps a day or two after Orochimaru’s retreat from Konoha. A lot of liberties were taken from that point on in terms of time-line. This is also a very angsty (especially Naruto) and sexually graphic fic—just the way we like it!

This was written as a one-on-one RP, so the point of view of the story will change, usually with every paragraph. Scenes will also change abruptly and large periods of time will pass with little notice, though I’ll try to give some warning at the beginning of the chapter.

// = thoughts
* = emphasis

Light warnings this chapter for Neji’s naughty hand. ^.^

Please read and enjoy!

Fading Scars
Chapter Five:

The next morning the pair found themselves a small rock side cave to spend the day in--whatever had once occupied it seemed long gone, but they still set a simple trap that would stop just about anything that came too near. Now that the rain had stopped Sasuke even stripped out of his shirt to set aside and let dry. When they settled in to sleep...he considered moving closer to Neji, to keep warm, but now that they had enough room for themselves he was too stubborn to suggest it. Grateful that he could at l sle sleep in the dark for once he curled up on his side facing the wall.

As he'd hoped, Sasuke was able to fall quickly and deeply asleep, thanks to the shadowed, closed in space--it almost felt safe. But he hadn't slept more deeply than a doze in some time, and it allowed his mind to wander free. The cold stone against his face...something about it drew him quickly into old memories, and he whimpered softly in his sleep. //Mama....//

Neji had likewise removed some of his clothing to dry, even going so far as to remove his headband and loosening his hair. He wished suddenly for some soap--he hated the feeling of oily, gritty hair. //When we get a bit further away, I'm taking a bath.// He sat down not too far from Sasuke, giving him the room he seemed to need, and wondered if he could dare start some kind of fire.

He had finally settled, the darkness somehow comforting. Neji was just about to slip into deeper dreams when a quiet sound brought his awareness back. He lay still, listening, and he finally recognized Sasuke's voice. //Is he dreaming?//

In Sasuke's mind...he wasn't alone. He was huddled in a room, cold except for his hands--his fingers were coated with thick warm fluid, so that when he pressed them to his face his eyes stung. //Mama....// Sasuke shuddered. In his dream he pulled his hands away only to be faced with a scene of burning scarlet, choking his breath as a cry tried to break free.

//No…this isn't real. This isn't--//

The corpse on the ground suddenly twisted, hair falling away to reveal a woman's gouged and bloodied face. And Sasuke screamed, unable to turn his eyes away.

Neji jerked himself upright, spinning around to quickly cover Sasuke's mouth and stop the sudden cry. When the boy tried to struggle, he pulled himself over the smaller, twisting body to keep him still. "Sasuke!" he hissed in his ear. "Wake up!"

Sasuke continued to thrash weakly beneath him, prying at Neji's hand as hot tears began to slide free from his tightly pressed eyelids. //B-Brother--?// Shaking, he reached for his kunai holster, but the touch of cool metal against his fingertips abruptly woke him. He went abruptly still as he stared at the blurred wall. //What…?//

"Calm down," Neji murmured, not moving just in case Sasuke was still confused. He frowned at the feel of liquid sliding over his fingers. //Is he crying...?// "It's me--it's Neji. You were dreaming."

//Dreaming…?// Sasuke tried to take in a sharp breath, but with Neji's hand against his face he couldn't get enough air. He panicked a little, and this time managed to get Neji's hand off him--he drew in a gasp that was half sob and turned his face against the ground.

Neji stayed still, biting his lip. //Damnit, it must have been something bad to get him this worked up.// He pushed himself up, just a little, so all his weight wasn't resting on Sasuke, but he remained hovering over him protectively. His hair fell down around them in a dark curtain. "Shh," he hushed quietly. Eyes lowering, Neji could just make out a few dark marks against Sasuke's skin--his fingers curled, recognizing what it was.

Sasuke continued to shiver against the ground, hating himself for the tears he couldn't stop from falling. He scrubbed at his eyes but that only made them ache more. "Leave me alone," he choked stubbornly, though shaken as he was it sounded as if he were pleading.

Sighing, Neji touched his head faintly. "Sasuke...it's okay," he murmured. "We all have nightmares, but if you really want me to go...." He trailed off, pushing himself to a sitting position beside the boy, keeping a hand on him a moment longer.

Sasuke didn't reply. He...didn't want Neji to go, when it was already so cold. His shoulders hunched. //Damnit, stop.// He pressed the heel of his palms into his eyes as if that would keep him from crying further. //Stop it!// "Mama...."

Neji felt his chest clench. He remembered crying like that, calling into the dark for someone.... //Damnit, why did this have to happen? Why us?// Moving closer, Neji gently took Sasuke's arm, trying to urge him closer. //Why were we destined to suffer like this?// "Come here."

Sasuke resisted only a moment, and then he was turning around, pressing up against Neji's chest. He gave up trying to stop his tears--he sobbed, quietly, as dark hair brushed his cheek. "I'm sorry," he whispered hoarsely.

Neji reached behind him, grabbing his still moist coat to cover them before wrapping his arms around the boy. "I understand," he murmured. Neji curled protectively around Sasuke's trembling form, biting the inside of his cheek to keep from losing to his own memories. "I understand...."

Sasuke finally cried himself dry, but he continued to shiver a little against Neji's body. Gradually that lessened as well, leaving him exhausted and ill. "Neji...." He sighed. "Sorry," he murmured. "I'm...all right, now."

Nodding, Neji gradually loosened his hold, leaning back to brush the hair and dirt from Sasuke's forehead. "I understand," he repeated. He pushed himself up on one elbow, glancing briefly at the cave entrance to be sure everything was fine, checking the hour. //We still have a lot of time.// Sighing, he lay back down. "Want me to...move?" he asked.

"No." There didn't seem to be any point in trying to save his pride in this situation. Sasuke slumped weakly against the earth as he tried to clean his face a bit. "Unless...you want to."

"It's fine." He didn't want to risk Sasuke having another screaming nightmare like that, most of all, though some small part of him wasn't about to turn aside the chance at warmth. Neji pillowed his head on his lower arm, the other winding around Sasuke, hand pressing lightly against his bare back.

Sasuke wriggled closer almost obediently at the touch, more eager than he would have admitted to have the warmth of another body again. "Um..." Unsure what to do with his arms he slipped one around Neji's ribs, surprised at how...nice it felt, being able to hold him. He sighed quietly. "Thanks."

Neji only nodded. His worry was quickly being replaced with a stirring heat in his stomach, encouraged by the feel of warm, bare skin against him. //It's been a while since I've been around someone. Too long.// His fingers continued to move idly against the younger boy's back, lightly tracing the line of his spine, the sharp jut of his shoulderblade.

//What is he...?// Sasuke frowned slightly at the gentle movements. He wasn't sure if Neji was still just trying to calm him or...whatever, but it was kind of nice, even if it was preventing him from falling asleep again. //I think I'm even getting used to his smell,// he thought idly. //It's…strange.//

Neji finally forced himself to stop--it wasn't fair, taking advantage of the boy. He fell still. //At least he's letting it go this far.// He relaxed against the ground, closing his eyes. "Feeling better?" he asked softly.

"Yeah...." By now Sasuke was curious--why did it feel so strange, lying like this? And at least it kept him from remembering his nightmare. "Sorry about that--it's been a while since I...you know." He moved his hand slightly against Neji's back as if that wouldp hip him figure it out for himself.

Neji's fingers curled faintly at the touch, sighing quietly into Sasuke's hair. "I understand," he replied. "I used to have nightmares like that, too."

Sasuke blushed a little at the warm breath against his scalp, then frowned. //Geez, I'm acting like a girl. Is that why this is so weird?// He kicked his feet faintly in frustration--even so, he didn't want to move away. //Oh yeah, he just said something.// Sasuke took in a deep breath. "Yeah. It sucks."

"They'll stop, eventually," he murmured. All Sasuke's little innocent movements were starting to make him anxious, and he resumed the subtle movement of his hand against the boy's back.

//I guess…it does feel good.// Giving in, Sasuke relaxed, licking his lips as he mirrored Neji's idle touches. //He's really warm.// "I hope so...."

//Sasuke...do you know what you're doing?// Wondering how brave he would get, Neji continued, sliding his fingers up to Sasuke's neck and down to the small of his back. //He's so thin....//

Sasuke shivered. //He's doing it again. Like before, when he touched my neck....// His fingers lost a little of their confidence as he traced Neji's ribs. //What should I do? Isn't this, like, flirting or something…?// He'd never spoken to anyone about those sorts of things--it never interested him. But now....

They were so close that Neji easily felt the tremor in the boy's skin. "You okay?" he asked, tone low. "Is this too much?"

Sasuke could feel Neji's voice rumble through his chest as he spoke. "Too much what?" he replied shortly, as if trying to pass it off. //How should I know, I don't know what I'm doing.//

Neji smirked. "You've never done this before, have you," he said, making his words a statement rather than a question. "You've never touched someone like this."

Sasuke snorted, glad that Neji couldn't have seen his embarrassed expression. "It's not like I've had time," he muttered, shifting. "Or the opportunity, or really wanted to...."

Neji pressed his hand lightly into the small of Sasuke's back, pulling him slowly closer. "Do you want to?" he asked.

//Do I want to…?// Sasuke was about to ask exactly what Neji was talking about, but as they pressed closer Sasuke felt something brush against his hip he knew he wasn't supposed to feel. He flushed as a familiar heat spread through him and coiled in his groin, making him hard.

//Shit--// Sasuke jerked back with a tiny gasp. "Wait--"

Neji held him still, though he allowed some space between them. "Sasuke." //You need to understand.// "Would you calm down?" he said quietly.

Sasuke scowled at him in the dark. "I'm fine," he muttered, drawing his hand back as if it would be any help hiding him. His shoulders hunched. //Shit. It's not like I've…done this before....//

Neji rolled his eyes. "Listen," he said quietly. "I like guys. You should know that, since we're traveling together." He slumped a bit against the ground. "I like them the way most guys like girls."

"You...." Sasuke frowned at him; Neji's eyes were still pale in the dark, and it was a little intimidating. //He likes guys the way…Sakura likes me?// He made a face. //What a waste of time.// But still...he couldn't deny that he had...reacted to him. "Isn't that wrong?" he asked bluntly. "I mean, that's not...how it's supposed to be, right?"

He snorted, pulling his arm back slightly. "That's not how to have children," he replied. "Most people believe that's enough for it to be wrong, especially in a house like those we were from. The Hyuuga's needed children, to later inherit or to later serve." Neji closed his eyes. "It may be wrong, but...it's the way I am. The way I was supposed to be."

"Oh." Sasuke frowned thoughtfully as he considered that, and at last he slowly sat up. //So he likes other guys? But then, does that mean…?// "Do you have a crush on me?" he asked abruptly, staring down at him.

Neji choked on another snort, rolling onto his back to better see the boy. "I think you're...attractive," he answered honestly. "It's not the same as a girly crush."

//Well that's a relief.// Sasuke continued to watch him. //Neji is…well, I don't know. When he touched me I…so does that mean that I'm like him…?// He twisted around so he could see Neji better. "What's it like?"

He raised an eyebrow, head tilting slightly. "What's what like?"

"Liking someone." Sasuke shrugged slightly. "I've never really liked somewhat before. What's it like?"

//He's really....// Neji relaxed again. //He's really that innocent.// "It feels good," he replied, tone lowered and sincere. "But also anxious. Like something is about to happen, and you want it to, and it builds up inside you. Here--" He laid a hand against his bare stomach, just above the waist of his pants. //I can feel it now.//

Sasuke sat up a little taller. //I felt that, didn't I? Just a while ago.// He frowned. //Does that mean I like him?// He scooted a little closer. Without really thinking he reached out, nudging Neji's hand away so he could touch him himself. "I see...."

His eyes narrowed. //Do you, Sasuke?// Neji trailed his fingers over the back of Sasuke's hand, tracing the tendons beneath his skin, up his wrist. "Sometimes...it goes lower," he continued. "And higher. Makes your heart pound. Makes you...tense."

Sasuke gulped; his pulse seemed to raise a pitch just from Neji mentioning it. He wasn't sure what he was doing but he lifted his other hand to Neji's chest, and he could feel his heart beating faster than normal--just as he'd said. He leaned slightly against Neji's side. A shift of his thighs reminded him that he was still excited and made him blush. "I think...I know what you mean."

Neji tilted his head. "Have you ever been with a girl?" he asked. "Ever held one. Kissed one?"

"No...." //I guess I could have--Sakura and her friends were so obsessed with it.// He shrugged. "It seemed boring."

Neji's eyes narrowed, and he couldn't help a smirk. "It depends on who you're kissing. If it's someone you like...it feels really good." //I wonder if he'd let me. It seems that he might be like me, with all this.// His fingers curled around Sasuke's in silent encouragement.

Though the thought that Neji may have wanted to kiss him wasn't anything new--Sasuke had gotten that from girls before, after all--there was something different about the way Neji was watching him. It wasn't the same kind of girly fluffy nonsense he was used to. It was somehow...intense. Sasuke licked his lips unconsciously. "Do you want me to?" he asked, maybe stalling a little. "Kiss you."

"I am curious," he admitted, deciding it would be best to be honest with Sasuke. "But it's up to you. I'm not about to jump a kid if he doesn't want me to." //I don't force people.// His fingers tightened. //I won't.//

"I'm not a kid," Sasuke muttered. But...he was curious, too. He edged higher up Neji's body and leaned slowly forward. He hesitated when he felt Neji's breath slide over his lips. //Am I really doing this?// Determined not to back down he pressed their mouths clumsily together.

Neji lifted a hand, catching the back of Sasuke's neck to hold him still. He was a bit surprised by his boldness--he hadn't expected Sasuke to actually do it--but he got over it quickly to return the kiss. His stomach curled. //I do like him. I wonder what he tastes like.// But he had to keep things slow, not wanting to overwhelm or surprise Sasuke. Neji moved his lips gently, coaxing Sasuke's to do the same.

Sasuke tensed; he wouldn't ever admit it, but he was nervous, and grateful for how gentle Neji was being. He was clumsy but gradually he began to get the hang of it. //It…does feel good.// He braced his hand against the ground next to Neji's head as he kissed him again, carefully.

//I wonder if he's ready for the next step....// Neji cupped the other's cheek in one hand, brushing with his thumb as he parted his lips. He used his tongue to try and get Sasuke to do the same, keeping him close as he deepened the kiss.

Sasuke made a soft sound of protest. //Ew, his tongue?// He pressed his lips shut but then it just felt slimy. //But he knows what he's doing, right?// Hesitantly he parted his lips, allowing Neji to do as he wanted.

Neji hummed soft approval, tugging Sasuke closer. //Trust me.// He rubbed their tongues together, trying to coax the boy to return his affections. //It feels good, doesn't it?// Lifting his free hand, Neji pressed it against the other's lower abdomen. //Right there....//

Sasuke murmured quietly, and was so surprised by the sound of his own voice he flinched back a little. He returned quickly to Neji's mouth. //I didn't know it felt like this.// He sucked experimentally on the tip of Neji's tongue and was delighted by the tiny shiver it spread through him. //It's really weird but I…kind of like it.//

Neji finally had to urge him back to catch his breath. He grinned softly against Sasuke's lips--a real grin. "Not so bad, is it." Before Sasuke could reply, he kissed him again, hands sliding down. "Here. Come lie down." He urged the boy lower, getting him to settle over his hips, a leg on either side of him. "It'll feel better."

Sasuke followed his prodding, but when he began to settle he paused, pressing against Neji's chest with sudden uncertainty. "Wait…." When he shifted his still taut flesh rubbed against Neji's stomach, sending a warm but uneasy tremor through him. It left him feeling strangely vulnerable.

"It's okay," he assured, gradually drawing Sasuke lower. Neji pressed his feet into the ground, pushing himself higher so his own hips brushed against him. "I am too." Neji kissed him, sucking briefly at his lips. "I am too."

Sasuke took his breath slowly as he allowed himself to be stretched out over Neji's body. When he kissed him again he tried to keep it slow so he could get used to all the different sensations. It still felt like they were doing something wrong, and it made his heart flutter.

Neji told himself to be satisfied, relaxing and simply continuing to kiss his companion. He slid a hand through Sasuke's hair, lightly massaging his scalp in hopes of getting him to loosen up. His other hand moved slowly along the line of the boy's spine.

"Neji...." Sasuke shivered, flexing his thighs slightly against Neji's sides. //I want something more.// But he wasn't sure what until he pushed himself a little higher, and the friction against his groin made him whimper.

He brushed Sasuke's cheek before kissing him again, softer and briefly. Neji closed his eyes as he leaned back, smiling to himself. //We'll be all right. Together....//

"What...." Sasuke gulped hard and licked his lips, still shifting awkwardly. It was against his nature, but he had to ask. "You know this...better than me," he whispered. "What should I do?"

Neji tilted his head, still moving his hand against Sasuke's back. "What do you want to do?" he asked back. //A cave isn't exactly the best place, but....// He stretched, arching his back slightly, just to see how Sasuke would react.

Sasuke's mouth went dry as the body shifted beneath him. "I don't know," he breathed. "Just...." He whimpered softly as he draped himself over Neji's chest. "It's hot…."

Neji held him close, lowering his head to kiss at Sasuke's neck. "Have you ever gotten off before?" //He can't be that innocent, can he? To have never....//

"Well, yeah...." Sasuke twisted a little--he didn't like Neji touching him so close to his curse seal. //I was nervous then, too.// He nuzzled Neji's neck as he tried to catch his breath back. Their small cave suddenly felt warmer...

He leaned back at the other's discomfort. "Want me to...help you?" he persisted, hands sliding over Sasuke's rear. Neji pulled them together, murmuring softly.

Sasuke gasped thickly. "Yes," he hissed thoughtlessly. "I...." He shook his head and gave Neji a sudden, firm kiss.

//All right then.// Neji had to urge Sasuke's hips back slightly to get beneath him, and he quickly slipped his hand into the boy's shorts. "Try to stay quiet," he whispered against Sasuke's lips. Circling hard flesh, Neji began to stroke him.

Sasuke bit his lip hard to keep from making a sound--Neji's hand was coarse, and the friction it gave him was almost too much. //He's really touching me.// He hadn't really been prepared for how much better it felt than when he had tried it himself…. He pressed his face fitfully against Neji's chest as he breathed harshly through his nose.

Neji wrapped his arm around trembling shoulders, keeping Sasuke close as he continued to massage him. For a moment...he wished they could have been home, warm in a bed. //Later,// he promised himself. //When this is all over...I'll take care of him properly.//

"Ne..." Sasuke's hips rocked instinctively into Neji's hand, and he hissed through his teeth. //Feels good....// It occurred to him for a moment that he should have been doing something for Neji, but the thought didn't last long--he simply couldn't concentrate with Neji touching him like that. Already he could feel that he wouldn't last much longer, and he whined plaintively. "Sto...."

"It's all right," Neji hissed quietly. "Go ahead." He increased his pace, just to make sure Sasuke wouldn't be able to protest. Turning his lips against the other's ear, he moaned quietly to help him along.

Sasuke shuddered, jaw clenching to keep all but a thin whine from sounding as he climaxed. He hadn't felt anything like it before, and it left him breathless and weak. "Neji...." With a quiet murmur he sagged against his chest.

Neji found his coat, pulling it over Sasuke's bare back. //I can sleep like this, and he'll need the rest.// Smiling, he ran a tender hand through Sasuke's hair, suddenly overcome with fondness for his companion.

Sasuke took long minutes to regain his breath, to relax and find his composure. "Neji...?" He shifted, and grimaced a little at how sticky he felt. //Should I…?// He kissed Neji's cheek. "What about...?"

"Don't worry about it," he said. "Get some more sleep--we can still get a few hours." Neji pulled him into a kiss. //I'm still wound up, but I'd rather he think on it for now.//

"Wait," Sasuke murmured when he pulled back. "I'm all...." He frowned, starting to slide off him. "I gotta piss," came the first excuse he could think of.

He chuckled softly. "All right." Neji stretched and folded his arms behind his head. "Watch out for the trap."

"Right…." Sasuke smirked vaguely and pushed wobbly to his feet. //Geez, I'm tired.// Trying to not let it show he slipped out of the cave. His face burned as he did his business, slipped quickly out of his shorts, and cleaned them and him as best he could in a deep puddle left by the rain. //Still damp, but at least it's not sticky.// He shivered--the fresh air against his sweat-moistened skin almost seemed to sting.

//I can't believe we actually just....// Sasuke glanced back at the cave, feeling his heart flutter a little. //Damn. I shouldn't be embarrassed, but…it kind of is.// With a deep breath he sidestepped their traps and crawled back inside.

Neji glanced up, smiling lightly. He raised a hand, silently waving Sasuke closer. //He really is pretty cute.// "All set?"

"Yeah." Sasuke dropped down next to him, stretching out on his side. After only a slight hesitation this time he slid up his companion. "I'm sleeping here," he said. "Problem with that?"

"None at all." Neji turned his head, touching a quick kiss to Sasuke's forehead. //He's warm.// "I'll try not to toss too much."

//I'll try not to wake up screaming....// Sasuke sighed as he finally relaxed. "Goodnight," he murmured. And despite everything that had happened, as he began to fall asleep he couldn't help but think that as long as Neji stayed with him, they'd be all right.

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