The Traveling Pussy

Chapter 5: ANBU’s Interrogation Room

I wasn’t expecting the little interrogation room I was left in to be painted blue. Blue was a calming color, a normal color. Surely it was de rigueur for all interrogation rooms to be a plain white or a menacing grey or, better yet, a scary black? In all my fantasies of being interrogated by Ibiki, I had usually gone with the black walls. I had pictured something like the secret hidden rooms in the mountain that Konoha’s citizens and children hid in when we were under attack. Blue walls, and pale blue to boot, were hardly part of my fantasies.

The mirror was perfect, however, big and wide. It was damn arousing to know I was being watched from the other side of it. The chairs were good too, made of steel, and fucking awful on the ass. I had taken the chair facing the mirror, but it occurred to me that was the normal position to take, so I stood up and tried sitting with my back to the mirror. There was nothing to look at but a pale blue wall and an empty chair. The steel table top between the two chairs attracted my attention. It was pretty perfect too. It was about three feet by six feet, a bit shorter than the table I like to imagine myself shackled to, but at least I’d fit on it without my head or feet hanging over.

I looked up at the ceiling. The harsh ceiling lights were just what I had expected. I had to see how they would look when lying on the table. I sat on the table and swung my legs up on it and lay down on my back. The ceiling light was definitely horrid on the eyes. I shut my eyes. With my eyes shut, it felt bizarre as if I was home in my bed with my eyes shut, just fantasizing I was lying on a steel table in one of ANBU’s interrogation rooms. I felt a shiver of pure excitement and rubbed my legs together and just moaned. The thought of someone watching me lying here so aroused, only made me feel hornier. Cripes, I needed to get off bad. I spent the last week fantasizing and masturbating to dreams of Gaara, working myself over until I couldn't really get off very well any more. Fake cock wasn’t cutting it. I needed the real thing.

It suddenly occurred to me I could be interrogated by a woman. If that happened, I was going to cry with frustration and disappointment. Crying would probably look good anyway, wasn’t that what interrogation rooms were for—breaking down people so they got to the stage were they would cry and spill their guts? I didn’t want to spill my guts, I wanted to spill out the juices of a fantastic orgasm, but it looked like that might not be happening. Dammit, dammit, dammit. If I’d just said nothing to that first ANBU figure or had kept heading home, I could be lying naked in my bed with two vibrators in me and some nipple clamps on, working myself towards ecstasy and exhaustion. It was my god-damn vacation, and it was also my bedtime after a hard night’s work. Ok, not a hard night’s work, but a full night’s work at the gate.

I looked at my watch to see it was 6:58, just 38 minutes since the last time I had checked it when sitting on the pavement of Shodai Street. I wondered how long I was going to be left here to just stew. Likely at least an hour or two. Hell, I might as well just masturbate and fall asleep. Maybe that would get me some attention more quickly. I sat up and unbuckled my shoes. I threw them in the corner below the mirror, just to be more annoying since they were now out of the line of sight of anyone on the other side of the mirror. Of course, there might be a secret peep hole somewhere else in the room--hell, there probably was--but I might not be expected to be thinking that way. A ninja’s shoes could hold a lot of weapons. They hadn’t asked me to disarm or anything.

I pushed the chair on the far side of the table from the mirror away from the table. I pulled my sunglasses out of my pocket and my wallet and set them on the chair seat. Then I took out my hair pins and set them on the chair. I took off my forehead protector, my half gloves, and my watch and put them on the chair too. Then I added my belt and weapon pouch to the pile as well as my shuriken holder. The straps of my bra were digging into my shoulders and the lining of the bra cups was making my aroused nipples feel a bit itchy. I took off my top and bra, rolling them up to make a neck support and lay back on the table with my right arm over my eyes to block out the light. If anyone was looking through the mirror, my breasts were on full display.

I had ok breasts. Men were usually not that fussy. But they weren’t anything special like Tsunade’s huge ones. Men didn’t even need to see Tsunade’s breasts naked to lose it. If Tsunade’s punch wasn’t so lethal, hardly anyone with a penis would ever look her in the face with those two melons pushing out there and tempting them to stare and drool. My boobs were pretty much standard size, standard appearance. I knew some women had big, dark aureoles around their nipples almost like a tattoo, but mine were nothing extraordinary. Other woman with pale skin like Sakura or Hinata probably had nipples that stood out more—spots of pink dramatically rising up from a mound of creamy white flesh. My skin was a soft tan or brown, and my nipples were a pinky-brown. I didn’t have any tattoos either.

I was suddenly glad I didn’t have any hickeys on my breasts—oh my god, what if I had managed to sleep with Gaara before ANBU pulled me in? I shivered and moaned at the thought of Ibiki examining my body for every mark of Gaara’s mouth, every love bite, every scratch—or sand burn? What would that sand feel like creeping around my body? I had been hoping it wouldn’t feel exactly like the regular sand like you found on a beach. Whenever I had spent time at the ocean shore swimming, I usually became a bit of a shower freak. Sand seemed to get everywhere, which was irritating. It wasn’t as gross as barbeque sauce though or bugs.

I started to laugh. The more I thought about it, the funnier it seemed. I had spent a week thinking about a guy who was partially sand, lived in sand, and always had sand with him or could make it in a second. I didn’t like sand. I sat up laughing, bending over, and holding my stomach since I was laughing so hard my stomach was starting to hurt. I gasped for air and tried to stop, but the giggles took me again. It wasn’t an orgasm, but it felt almost as good to just laugh myself into exhaustion. Panting between new waves of chuckles, I finally collapsed back on the table. I felt really tired now. I reached down for my leaf headband. I leaned up enough to tie my forehead protector over my eyes and block out that awful light.

I was going to try to sleep now. I undid the top button of my pants and slid the zipper down, so I could breathe better. I felt a few last little chuckles came out of my mouth before I managed to put myself into a state of relaxation. There was no better place to take a nap if you liked peace and quiet. The room was soundproofed and silent. Although the light was harsh and the table hard, it wasn’t cold or hot in the room. And Konoha’s finest were protecting me and watching over me. When I think back on it now, I’m pretty amazed I was so cool at that time. But somehow then it just seemed like a perfectly normal thing to do on the first morning of my week-long vacation. I let myself slide into sleep.

Part of the reason I slept so deeply was no doubt the fact that I was dreaming I was lying awake in ANBU’s pale blue interrogation room. I was shackled to the steel table. Ino-Shika-Cho and Kiba came in wearing ANBU masks. Ino was whining I had ruined her panties from the last time they had stuck them in my mouth. She wanted Chouji to put his boxers in my mouth. Chouji insisted he had gone commando today and took off his pants to prove it. Then for some reason he used his Buben Baika no Jutsu to enlarge his penis to about three feet in length and the thickness of a good stout bat. This sort of thing happened a lot in dreams, so it didn’t surprise me too much. He started slapping my breasts with his unnaturally enlarged member, saying, “Pinch your nipples, bitch, I want to see you pinch your nipples.” That didn’t sound very Chouji like, but I wasn’t going to complain about Chouji suddenly getting a backbone.

I was pinching my nipples when the door opened, and Shino came in still in his ANBU uniform and said, “Yo, wake up!” I didn’t want Shino in my dream. Dreams with Shino in them tended to be nightmares. It was annoying that Shino was saying again and again, “Wake up, Sleeping Beauty, wake up!”

Horribly, I suddenly realized Shino must be real. I stopped pinching my nipples, sat up, and pulled my forehead protector off my eyes. Yup, I was in the pale blue interrogation room with just Shino. This wasn’t a dream, dammit.

I scowled, pissed off. Dreams of Chouji and his Buben Baika no Jutsu didn’t come very often and to be interrupted in the middle of a good one was incredibly annoying. “What the fuck do you want now Shino?” I snapped, “Can't you see I was trying to sleep?”

Shino laughed in that weird way he had, “You’ll never change, will you? Well, feel free to go back to sleep, everyone is enjoying the show. Since you got me my promotion, I was feeling sort of grateful and was going to offer you a pillow, so you could put your shirt back on.”

Sure enough there was a pillow in his hand, a small navy square of fabric. “Oh, thanks, chuck it here,” I said.

When I had caught it, I said, “That’s pretty nice of you, but you don’t owe me a damn thing. Until you appeared in your ridiculous version of the ANBU uniform, I still thought you were a chuunin. You do know that collar is stupid, don’t you?”

Shino didn’t say anything and with the mask of course I couldn’t see his reaction. “Well, whatever, but when you recruit Kotetsu don’t let him put that silly bandage he always ties around his face over his pretty animal mask.”

Shino bowed to me, revealing his wide tall collar was holding a massive amount of bugs. Shit! Shino always managed to make me feel like an ass. “Ok, so it’s a great hiding place for your buddies, but it still looks dumb,” I said defensively, grabbing back for my shirt. I pulled it on not bothering with my bra.

“Sweet dreams,” said Shino.

“Hey, hey, don’t go bug boy. I’m lonely in here. Tell little old me all about your promotion. Oh, and, uh, congratulations.”

“Thanks,” said Shino, “but it was your comments about me in your crime reports that helped.”

“I wrote about you in a report?”

“That’s what I heard.”

“Well fancy that, can we call it even now? Are my nose and ears safe?”

“I wouldn’t do that to you,” said Shino.

“Oh, now, you tell me! You’re pretty fucking scary when you’re pissed.”

“So are you,” said Shino.

“Ah, I love complements! So, hey, you’re like talking to me now. Does that mean we can have sex?”

“I don’t think I’m scary enough for you,” said Shino.

I threw the pillow at him, “Asshole! Who told you?”

He didn’t say anything and stood there in that silly mask. I reached down to the chair where I had put my stuff and went for a kunai. Of course my hand didn’t make it, held back by a stream of his bugs.

“Chicken shit,” I said, “Can’t you come closer and restrain me with your body? Come on, let’s really give them a show.”

“I think your comments just prove my point,” said Shino with a sigh. His bugs returned to him, and he threw the pillow back at me. “Sorry, I may be talking to you, but I’m not touching you. Here, go back to sleep.”

I caught it, sniffing, pissed off that bug boy still didn’t want me. God, all the crap guys talk about always being ready for sex and being willing and ready to do it anywhere. It was seriously crap. If I had a dollar for every guy that turned me down, I could—well, I couldn’t do much, but I could sure get myself a damn fine dinner with drinks and dessert at the finest restaurant in town. Fuck! I had been planning to treat myself over this holiday. Suddenly, I was really hungry. I was also pissed that Shino seemed to know about my new sexual preference. Who else did? And who had talked—Kiba, Ino, Chouji, or Shikamaru?

Suddenly it occurred to me this whole thing might be an elaborate joke set up by them with Shino. Maybe Shino hadn’t been promoted, and this was some weird-ass game that all five of them had thought up. It was about as weird and pointless as that bizarre break-in where I’d been tied up and smelled up by Kiba. I stood up, angry. I pulled off my shirt and put my bra on, and then put the shirt back on. It was smelling a little, and that made me madder. I stomped over to the corner and got my shoes and put them on, then proceeded to gear up. Before I put my weapons pouch back on, I opened it up and began methodically sorting out what I had. I wasn’t planning on sticking around much longer, so I figured I'd better be ready for a fight just in case.

Hmm, I didn’t really have that much on me. I’d have liked to have had a few more exploding tags. I sat back in the chair and leaned back against the wall and propped my feet up on the table. Absent-mindedly I flipped up the kunai in my hand, sending it spinning up in the air, and caught it on the way down. I liked to toss a kunai like this when I was thinking hard. Supposedly it scares some people, which was good because they usually left me alone to think in peace.

God, this chair was hard on the ass. I pulled my legs off the table and grabbed that stupid pillow so I could sit on it. I checked my watch again. It was nine-fucking-thirty in the morning! Well at least I had gotten a fairly decent nap in. I stood up and went to try the door to see if it was open. It was. Well, that was another mind game I’d failed at, I thought grumpily. I stepped into the hall and was surprised to see no one at all. How humiliating! I was considered so low a threat, not only hadn’t they taken my weapons, they hadn’t bothered to lock the door, or even post a guard. Cripes, there probably wasn’t even anybody next door watching, and Shino was lying about “they” enjoying the show.

I went over the door into the mirror room and jerked it open, expecting it to be an empty, dinky little closet. To my surprise, it was a rather large and luxurious office—and sitting behind a heavy, wide desk with a good view of the window to my little blue cell was Ibiki.

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