Shattered Dreams

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“So, what happened Kakashi?” Tenzo asked. “I thought this was just a simple reconnaissance mission.”

“Yeah, you and me both.” He sighed. “So, I guess you all want the gory details then?” he grinned.

“Yeah well you know only if you feel like it.” Sai said sarcastically.

Kakashi smirked at that and prepared to tell them all what had happened and why he had vanished.

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Flashback

Kakashi left the village and immediately leapt up into the trees and made his way to the mission he’d been assigned as fast as possible. He wanted to spend as little time as possible on the journey there, he just wanted to observe and report back. If these were indeed Orochimaru’s henchmen then it could be a possible lead to Sasuke. ‘I hope this can lead us to Sasuke’ he thought to himself. ‘He’s been gone far too long. It’s about damn time he came home!’ he sighed hoping that Sasuke would be back. Things just weren’t right without him, and to have Orochimaru’s men so close to home? That just wasn’t good any way you thought about it.

He continued on his journey wishing he had someone along with him. Of course he could call Pakkun but he just wanted to get this mission over with and hopefully the ANBU would be able to come and sort things out once he got there and sorted out what was what. He got his latest Icha Icha book out and read as he went. Ok so for most people especially travelling this fast it really wasn’t a good idea but well he had the Sharingan to keep an eye on his surroundings, he thought as he uncovered it just in case.

He neither met nor even saw or heard a single person on his journey, and he was rather glad of this as he had a chance to catch up on his reading. He travelled fast and relentlessly not stopping till gone very late in the afternoon, at which time he resigned himself to having to eat something. He sat down on a rather solid tree branch and began to eat his rice balls while reading through Icha Icha Tactics again. After a short break he set off on his way again as fast as possible, only stopping as it became to dark to see by.

He stopped grudgingly and set up a campfire, after calling his ninken to help keep guard and for company he finally sat on the ground, and read for a while, Pakkun sat obediently by his side. ‘I wish Team 7 was here’ he thought. ‘At least with Naruto yelling constantly, Sakura hitting him on the head…’ He sighed deeply at that name. ‘Sakura!’ he thought. He knew he shouldn’t think of her in that way, but well she was of age, and well something about their relationship had changed recently. It wasn’t like he’d asked to feel this way.

“You’re in for it now Kakashi.” He groaned.

“In for what, boss?” Pakkun questioned.

“Huh? Oh nothing, just thinking aloud.” He answered knowing that it wouldn’t satisfy the little dog but he also knew he wouldn’t keep questioning him either. ‘Shit Kakashi, you gotta be careful what you think.’ He shook his head and stuck his nose back in his book, before eventually settling down to sleep.

His dreams were invaded by an extremely beautiful woman, one with sparkling green eyes, pink hair and the sweetest blush that spread across her cheeks when he made one of his dirty comments or a rude joke. He loved her innocence at those times, but there was also the tough side to her, the side that could punch a hole through the wall or through any mans chest if needed. Being around her was intoxicating but she would just have to remain forever in his dreams, his rather steamy dreams he might add. He couldn’t allow it to go any further. It wasn’t that he didn’t want her, or that she wasn’t beautiful, it wasn’t even that he thought she had no attraction to him what so ever (which he was certain she didn’t) but he wasn’t worthy of her.

He knew he’d never be good enough for her. She deserved someone who could tell her how he was feeling, say the words I love you, someone who wasn’t an older, perverted, undeserving of love, waste of space. Someone who wouldn’t make her cry, by doing or saying the wrong thing, and of course there was always the chance he wouldn’t come back from a mission leaving her alone. He couldn’t do that to her.

Unfortunately for him he had no idea just how prophetic his thoughts and dreams were going to turn out...

The next few days consisted of the same routine, travel hard and fast, whilst reading, stop late afternoon for something to eat, continue till it was to dark to see, then sit with his ninken on guard before finally falling into his dreams where Sakura was by his side always and in various other positions most of the time to.

On the third day he arrived at his destination and decided he’d better observe alone, the more people observing the more chance of being found out. He wasn’t to get in battle here, he was just there to gather information and report back as soon as possible, if he were to engage in battle they would most likely move to a new place and their objective of finding out something about Sasuke would be ruined. He moved forward silently ever watchful searching for the underground bunker that was supposedly near by. He’d find the entrance soon he was sure, and soon enough there it was.

He settled down in a tree to observe, he didn’t even attempt to enter the compound. That wasn’t his mission, he was just there to look and listen. What he wouldn’t give for someone to share this task with, a warm body to rest against… ‘Snap out of it Kakashi, this isn’t the time!’ he admonished himself. He continued his lonely vigil day after day catching small snippets of conversation as the men and women below him carried out their assigned tasks. Not a word of Sasuke reached his ears however.

Growing bored and realising that they either didn’t seem to know the whereabouts of Sasuke or they just didn’t care, he began to think it might be time to head home. On the fifth day of watching it seemed they had figured out someone was around. They clearly didn’t know whom or where but he figured that now was the time to bow out before he really was found out.

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Jumping down from his perch, he made to disappear before anyone noticed he had been there. Unfortunately someone had noticed he was there however, they were on him in seconds. He knew he had been ordered not to fight on this mission unless absolutely necessary but this felt pretty much necessary. So he prepared to challenge the man in front of him as he felt more of them arrive. ‘Well Kakashi you better deal with this quick and make a fast exit’ he sighed to himself as he raised his hitai-ate to uncover his sharingan.

With a puff of smoke he disappeared only to reappear behind the first enemy nin and had his kunai buried in the mans back before he even knew what hit him. Turning on his heel he brought the kunai up to defend himself from the attack of the second man who’d appeared behind him pretty much from nowhere as he’d just done. The man looked at him in surprise. ‘Damn this one’s fast and smart too, we better watch our step with him.’ He decided.

The clash of metal on metal sounded again as another attacked him from the left side, no time to read his book in this battle it seemed as he ducked a flying shuriken that landed in a tree behind him and buried itself in the soft bark. He moved with lightning speed and buried his kunai in the chest of the third man whilst using his other arm to defend from the second one. Unfortunately at that moment a fourth man appeared and sliced a huge gash down his leg. He’d managed to catch the kunai before it did too much damage, but his distraction with the first two guys had cost him a little. He spun around and delivered a swift kick to the man sending him flying a few feet and knocking him unconscious for a few minutes.

Of course as soon as he dealt with one, more came along. Two more came running into the fray as Kakashi pondered his next move. As all four of them came running at him he used his substitution jutsu and disappeared under the ground, only to come flying up attacking the first man from beneath, who went flying crashing his head into a tree and landing in a rather undignified heap at the bottom of the tree, blood trickling from his head wound.

Kakashi quickly dealt with the remaining two ninja and dispatched them with a flick of his wrist and a swift stab from his kunai. He realised he couldn’t leave the last two alive. Ok so they were barely breathing and totally unconscious but he couldn’t allow them to live and tell of the fact that he had been there. Moving forward cautiously, knowing that although they were supposedly unconscious there was always the off chance that they might be more awake than he thought.

He moved towards the first man warily watching for any signs that the man was about to move but there was no indication that he was anything but deeply unconscious. Kakashi made to dispatch him swiftly and without hesitation when without warning the man actually did awaken and ripped through Kakashi’s uniform slicing a rather nasty gash down his arm. Kakashi’s eyes darkened as he moved back a little and began circling the prone man.

Without warning the man flew up from his position on the ground and stabbed Kakashi in the shoulder blade with his kunai. Unfortunately for him Kakashi’s kunai had also been raised and the man was impaled on it as he drove his own weapon deep into Kakashi’s shoulder. Kakashi growled at the pain in his shoulder but used all his strength to push the now dead man off of him.

With fury raging in his eyes he turned to the man slumped against the tree and dispatched him without a second thought. Wincing slightly and breathing heavily he used the blood from his wound to summon his ninken and asked them to bury the bodies and then disappear.

“Boss?” Pakkun asked warily.

“Yes?”

“You ok? You need medical assistance.”

“I know but I can’t risk anyone coming here just yet. Just bury the bodies and go. I’ll call you again when it’s safe to summon the ANBU here ok? I need the enemy to continue to think they’re safe here and not move on before we can get some intelligence from them.” He said crinkling his eye in a smile to the small dog.

“Ok boss.” He replied moving to join the rest in disposing of the enemy.

Kakashi meanwhile was looking around for somewhere to rest for a while until the coast was clear again and he had the strength to move again. Spotting the gaping hole in set into the side of the rock he decided that would be the best place to go. As the dogs finished their work Pakkun turned again to his master with a worried expression.

“Boss, I’m not happy about this.” He sighed.

“Yeah, me either but I need to try and see if I can gather something about Sasuke. I need to do it. I couldn’t stop him leaving but I can sure as hell try to gather some info and see if we can bring him back eventually.” He uttered darkly.

“Ok but you call me if you get anymore trouble ok?” the small dog growled.

Kakashi laughed at this, Pakkun wasn’t a fighting dog, they all knew that but yet he seemed to be deadly serious about this.

“Yes. I promise ok?” he said turning to grin at the dog.

“I’ll hold you to that mind.”

“I know.” He chuckled.

With that said Pakkun disappeared in a puff of smoke and Kakashi moved towards the cavernous entrance to the mountain. Something was drawing him in, he had no idea what it was or why but something seemed to be practically calling him onwards and to the back of the cavern. He wasn’t generally one for destiny and all that kind of stuff but this just seemed the best thing to do. So he followed his instincts and made his way along the surface of the river, through the pitch black darkness that surrounded him.

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A few hours later, Kakashi found himself facing the thing that seemed to be drawing him further and further into the cave than he’d originally planned. A faintly glowing blue light surrounding a floating ball of bright white light hovered in the air in front of him.

‘What the hell is that?!’ He wondered curiously. He had a rather disturbing urge to touch it, but resisted rationalising that it was most definitely not the world’s best idea to touch something unknown and potentially dangerous. And yet for some reason his hand had decided it was the best idea in the world and was drawn to the glowing orb without any hesitation despite his insistence that he had no desire to touch the thing.

As his fingers pushed through the light and brushed against the glowing ball every last ounce of pain and weariness left his body and he fell in slow motion to the ground, where upon his mind drifted in and out of unconsciousness and the entrance to the part of the cave he was in sealed itself. The ANBU searched the area many times, including entering the cave but the seal was so complete that none of them realised there was a room hidden behind the wall that they faced and so the fate of Kakashi Hatake was hidden from all view for a long time until Team 7 came looking.

End Flashback

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“So after I fell asleep and watched the entrance seal itself, that’s all I remember until I looked up and saw Sakura in front of me fighting that masked shinobi.”

Sakura blushed at this but hid her face in Sasuke’s leg.

“Well that’s a story and a half.” Tenzo said shocked.

“And we still don’t know what the hell that damn thing was either.” Sasuke replied.

“You didn’t check it? We can go back and check it tomorrow before we leave.” Kakashi said still under the impression it would be there.

“Well… see sensei… fact is… it well…” Naruto flustered.

“It vanished as soon as we moved you.” Sasuke finished for him.

“Really? Well that puts paid to that idea then.” He sighed. “So what did I miss in the last two years then? Apart from the entire team finally coming together and working properly, the rather obvious reappearance of Sasuke and the fact that he and Sakura appear to be a couple?” he grinned.

“What?! No! It’s not….!” She yelled jumping up from her current position as if a poisonous spider had just crawled over her face.

Sasuke pulled back slightly and regarded his sensei warily. He was just trying to gage their reaction to see if anything at all was between the pair of them. That much was obvious.

“There’s nothing between Sakura and I, as I told you she’s given her affections to someone else.” He replied coolly.

“Ah so you did, forgive me my mind is still adjusting to the trauma.” He grinned his usual grin, his uncovered eye crinkling as he did so.

Sasuke however knew better than to believe it, they’d spent too much time listening to his lies to believe this one. He was just testing the waters, that much was clear. Sasuke decided the time to have their little chat would have to be soon, so made a note to do it sooner rather than later, although he supposed it would have to wait till tomorrow. He should give Kakashi some time to recover before flying headlong into a discussion on Sakura’s love life, that he was sure was soon to contain the copy ninja.

“Come sit down Sakura.” Sasuke said to her beckoning her back to him. “You’re tired, you need to rest.”

Sakura moved forward warily. She didn’t want Kakashi to get the wrong idea, but she seemed to figure he was only kidding so she moved forward and lay down with her head in Sasuke’s lap again. Kakashi immediately picked up her feet again and began to massage them gently, lulling her into an almost sleep like state. She purred like a kitten, what with Kakashi massaging her feet and Sasuke running his hands through her hair again she couldn’t help but relax totally.

“Well how about a celebration?” Tenzo asked everyone. “I know were still on a mission but well we gotta toast Kakashi being back, right?”

“Hell yeah!” Naruto cried.

“Sounds good to me.” Sasuke replied.

“Yeah.” Sai said.

“Sakura?” Kakashi asked gently.

“I’m awake, I’m awake!” she cried sitting up.

“Yeah we established that.” Sasuke smirked. “Kakashi was asking if you were feeling up to joining us in celebration.”

“Oh, um, yeah.” She mumbled turning bright red again.

Kakashi laughed gently as Tenzo passed around cups and a large bottle of sake, he’d taken from inside a scroll.

“Put them in there to keep them from smashing.” He shrugged as they all looked at him.

They all took a glass, grinning as they did so.

“To the return of Kakashi!” they toasted.

“To my return.” He said joining in. “and to Sasuke to since I missed his return.”

“To Kakashi and Sasuke.” They toasted happily.

Unfortunately since Sakura never drank much, she didn’t like the taste and she hated to lose control so to her dismay the sake affected her more than the men and she ended up slightly tipsy, clinging to Kakashi’s side and refused to allow him to move.

“Sakura.” He whispered grinning. “You’re going to have to let go soon. After two years frozen I need to go to the bathroom, and pretty badly to.” He laughed.

Of course Sakura blushed a million shades of red and purple as she relinquished her grip on his arm and allowed him to head outside and do what he needed to. She collapsed back into Sasuke’s lap. He’d moved to sit with his back leaning against the wall by now, so she sat between his legs and collapsed against his chest, twirling a lock of his hair around her finger again.

Kakashi walked back in the room and the first thing he saw was Sakura looking so endearing as she twirled Sasuke’s hair around her finger. ‘God what I wouldn’t give to be sat there with her pressed against me, playing with my hair’ he sighed. ‘Pull yourself together Kakashi this isn’t he time to be thinking things like that.’ So ignoring his feelings and thoughts he sat down where’d he’d previously been and relaxed with his book.

Kakashi!” Sakura screeched upon seeing this.

“What?” He grinned, faking astonishment at her outburst as if he had no idea why she was seething.

“You are not going to read that damn book right now!”

“Well apparently my brain says differently.” He replied as his eye slid back to his book his smirk growing wider.

Sakura let go of Sasuke’s hair and pulled her self away from him as she stood up and walked over to Kakashi. As she moved closer he swiftly stood up, still reading and backing away from her carefully. She advanced on him as he feigned being afraid. As she got closer she reached for the book but he just moved it higher and out of her reach continuing to read as he did so. Which only served to fuel her indignation as she moved forward again determined to get the book from his hands.

“Kakashi!” she cried out as he backed out of the room and into the bedroom they’d vacated earlier.

“Well I see there both feeling ok again.” Tenzo said shaking his head as the rest agreed.

“I’m leaving them to battle it out.” Sasuke said sounding bored but in actuality he was glad they seemed to be getting on so well, maybe there was hope for them together.

“Yeah, let’s just stay out of their way for now.” Sai said sounding rather serious.

“Shouldn’t we be heading to bed soon?” Naruto asked sounding like the sensible one for once.

This of course caused all three of them to turn and look at him in astonishment. Naruto worried about them getting enough rest? Since when was he the thoughtful one?

“Yeah we should, but let those two fight it out a little longer before we turn in. It’s rather amusing really, she’ll never win and yet he let’s her think she will.” He said shaking his head and grinning as Sakura growled Kakashi’s name causing them all to smirk, even Sai couldn’t deny it was amusing the way they fought, like children over a favourite toy.

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“Sakura” Kakashi said grinning down at her. “You know the only way you’d get this book off me is from my cold dead fingers.” He chuckled.

“That can be arranged.” She growled moving forward again.

“Oh Sakura, your words cut so deep.” He said faking hurt at her words. Suddenly a very wicked idea hit him as he backed into the middle of the room, where the sleeping bag still lay, spread out on the floor. ‘So you wanna play huh?’ he thought as he planned his next move. ‘Time to see that blush spread across your beautiful little face my precious kunoichi.’

He waited until she lunged at him again, then he gripped her wrist in his hand and proceeded to ‘trip’ over the edge of the sleeping bag, falling to the ground with Sakura following his descent and landing as he’d planned on top of him.

“Kakashi!” she shrieked in indignation, slapping him across the chest, but the blush spreading across her told him all he wanted to know. She was still just as pure as the day he’d left the village, he was certain of that. He grinned broadly before composing his face into a more sombre expression.

“It wasn’t my fault, you were coming at me and I tripped on the edge of the sleeping bag. I wouldn’t raise a hand to a woman.” He said making an excuse.

“Liar!” she swatted him again as he laughed hard.

“Well are you going to let me up or do plan to stay on top of me for the rest of the night?” he asked with a rather dirty smirk spreading across his entire face.

Sakura blushed deeply again before scrambling off him in complete embarrassment, mumbling apology after apology at him while refusing to look him in the eye.

“Sakura.” He grinned looking at her directly and waiting for her to raise her eyes to his. “I did it on purpose.” He said as he stood up.

“You bastard!” she admonished with just the slightest hint of a grin twitching at the corners of her mouth.

“Don’t hate me for it ok?” he said bending down so that his face was in front of hers. “I just thought you could use a good joke after today. Friends again?” he asked holding out his hand to help her up.

“Yeah, fine friends.” She said taking his hand and pulling herself up. “But if you do it again, I’ll kill you.” She ground out.

“So it’s a deal I wont do it again and you won’t kill me right?” He grinned holding out his hand again to shake on it.

“Yeah, but don’t count on it.” She growled, returning the shake.

“Come on, let’s get back to the others.” He said wrapping his arm around her shoulders and leading them into the other room.

“So did you win?” Sasuke asked, smirking at the sulky look on Sakura’s face.

“Sadly no.” Kakashi grinned back. “Unfortunately for her, her shinobi skills aren’t quite as up to par as she makes out. She tripped over.” He said smugly.

“You liar!” she said slapping him again, her face red again only with anger this time. “You fell to! So much for the Great Copy Ninja Kakashi Hatake! You clumsy oaf!” She sneered.

“Hey! I’m not gonna hurt a woman. All I did was back off, is it my fault that I tripped on the edge of the sleeping bag?” He said backing off a little and holding his hands up protectively.

“Shut up!” She snapped, poking her tongue out at Kakashi and going back to sit with Sasuke, who promptly wrapped his arms around her and laughed loudly at the goings on of one of his best friends and his ex-sensei.

“Well you know we should all head to bed before we start on the journey home tomorrow. Sai, Sasuke, Naruto, Sakura go get some rest.” Tenzo ordered.

“Yes sensei.” They answered trudging off to bed.

Sasuke, Sai and Naruto all nodded at Kakashi as they passed, he nodded back to each of them in turn. As it came Sakura’s turn to pass him she reached out her hand shyly. He took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze, giving her an eye crinkling smile before lowering his hand again. She smiled back a little unsure but followed the boys into the other room anyway.

Tenzo got up and headed outside before sitting himself down again. Kakashi followed sensing he wanted to talk but didn’t want the others to overhear. Settling down next to him Kakashi turned and said

“So what’s up?”

“Are you sure you’re ok? I mean you were like frozen all that time and well they’ve been so worried, Sakura especially. I think everyone just presumes she’s grown up now and is tough as nails but she’s still pretty soft underneath it all you know.”

“I’m fine, I swear. I feel pretty good actually. And don’t worry I know the real Sakura, she can be just as tough as those boys in there but she has a heart of gold that one.” He grinned.

“You’re honestly ok?”

“Trust me I’m fine. If Sakura’s given me a bill of health I must be ok right? I mean she is the Hokage’s apprentice right?” he grinned his eye crinkling smile.

“Yeah I’m sure you’re right.” Tenzo sighed before handing Kakashi another bottle of sake. “Might not be the best idea under the circumstances but eh we’ll over look that right?”

“Sure.” Kakashi grinned as they drank half the bottle of sake between them before deciding they really should head to bed.

They entered the house again and Kakashi decided to take a look at the team. They were of course fast asleep, thanks in small part to the sake they’d drunk, but also due to being so tired from the day’s activities. They’d fallen asleep the same way they had in the woods the night before, Sakura on her side gripping Naruto’s hand pretty hard, Sasuke behind her, not actually touching her apart from his hand draped over her hip and her other hand gripping his hand and Sai above her his hand resting on her head again.

Kakashi sighed. So much he’d missed, Sasuke returning, making right with Sakura and Naruto and even Sai it seemed, Sakura growing so strong, all the boys growing up to be caring considerate men… ‘What else have I missed?’ he thought sadly. Of course what he didn’t realise was that all this had only come about due to him and the fact that he was missing. They’d pretty much clung to each other while they waited for him to return. Sighing again he closed the bedroom door and settled down in the main room, while Tenzo kept watch.

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A few hours later Tenzo moved to wake Sai up for guard duty but just as he did so a hand reached out and grabbed his ankle. He turned to see Kakashi sitting up.

“Go back to sleep!” He hissed looking at him.

“Can’t sleep.” He shrugged. “I’ll take over guard duty. I’m fine,” he said catching the look on Tenzo’s face. “Honestly I’m fine, I just want some fresh air, just relax I’m fine.”

“Ok, ok but if you go disappearing again don’t expect me to come looking for you a second time.” He sighed.

“Fine, I won’t expect you any time soon if I go wondering again.” He grinned.

Tenzo groaned and said “You may be my superior Kakashi Hatake but you’re an infuriating man, you know that?”

“Lady Hokage tells me that every day.” He chuckled.

“Go on get out and leave me in piece!” he sighed half groaning, half laughing, before rolling over to sleep.

Kakashi exited the small house again and sat down with his back against the wall. ‘Two years have passed? How the hell did everything go so wrong?’ Of course these were questions he’d never receive the answer to. He sighed and made himself more comfortable, for once he didn’t get his book out. He just sat staring at the sky glad to be able to see it again.

Suddenly he sensed a familiar chakra signature at his side and he looked up to see Sakura standing there looking down at him sadly. He put his arm out motioning for her to sit with him. She sat down and immediately snuggled into his chest without saying a word. He put his arm around her shoulder and rested his cheek on the top of her head before looking back up at the inky blue sky dotted with thousands of brightly shining stars.

He sighed contently, it may not be completely appropriate to sit here with his young ex-student in his arms but how could it be so wrong when it just felt so right? Besides she was all he thought about before he’d disappeared and he couldn’t change that now that he was back, at least not straight away anyway.

Sakura shivered slightly after they’d sat in total silence for a while, just enjoying each others company. He chuckled as she did so.

“You should go back inside” he said gently, “You’re cold and tired.”

She shook her head no and just inched closer to him shivering again.

“Sakura, you need to rest and you need to keep warm.”

“No.” She shook her head stubbornly again. “I’m not leaving you out here alone. What if something happens to you again?” she said sounding scared as tears leaked from her eyes at the thought of losing him again.

“Sakura.” He whispered lifting her chin and looking straight into her eyes. “I’m not going anywhere again, ok?”

“Ok.” She breathed.

‘Dear god she looks so beautiful with the moon shining on her like this.’ He thought as he fought the urge to kiss her. He smiled again as she shivered once again.

“Sakura…”

“No.” She interrupted more stubborn than ever.

“Fine, then at least come here, so I can keep you warm.” He said gesturing for her to sit between his legs.

She moved towards him unsure of herself, this was what she wanted to be wrapped up in his arms like Sasuke and Naruto had done so many times to comfort her, but she couldn’t help feeling he was only doing it out of duty or pity for her. One look at his face however told her his concern was genuine so she moved shyly to sit in his lap, but she sat to far away to gain the benefits of body heat.

“Not there, come here.” Kakashi chuckled, pulling her to him tight and wrapping his legs over hers and his arms around her torso. “Better?” he whispered in her ear.

“Mmm hmm.” She muttered going bright red again.

He squeezed her gently again and she felt rather than heard him chuckle his amusement over her embarrassment. She slapped his chest again for laughing at her and he laughed again knowing she didn’t mean it at all.

“You’d never hurt me Sakura. We both know you couldn’t.”

“Shut up!” She muttered grumpily into his chest.

“I love it when you get angry.” He laughed. “You’re so cute.”

Sakura turned round and kneeled up facing him when he said this, with a look of indignation and a little embarrassment on her face. She leaned forward and moved her arm to slap him square in the face. He chuckled and grabbed her wrist, and held her hand to his face while grabbing her hip with his other hand. She moved to release herself from his grip but hadn’t noticed the hand holding her hip and she fell backwards, her left hand grasping onto anything to keep her from falling and ended up pulling down his mask.

Before she knew what was happening or had a chance to look at his face he leaned forward and pressed his lips to hers, passionate but gentle. He didn’t want to scare her with the desire burning in his heart so he restrained himself from kissing her to hard.

She froze at first terrified and excited all at the same time, after a few seconds, just as Kakashi was about to pull away fearing he’d gotten it all wrong and she wasn’t interested at all, she just cared for him as friend, a teacher, she came round from her shock and responded willingly.

Keeping hold of her left hand with his right and his other hand on her hip, he leaned back against the wall of the cabin pulling her to him. ‘Is this real or am I hallucinating?’ she wondered but the amazing warm tingle that shot through her entire body as he opened his mouth just enough to allow his tongue to gently sweep across her lips told her it was most definitely real.

She melted into his arms and he moaned gently. ‘Dear god you have to stop this before it goes too far Kakashi. Before anything else happens.’ He scolded himself.He knew his sub-conscious was right of course, this wasn’t exactly right or he thought it wasn’t anyway, it certainly felt right, but if he didn’t stop it now he knew there was a chance he’d get too turned on to stop and he couldn’t do that to her. He wanted her, god knows he wanted her but he couldn’t take her here and now, he had to know she was certain she wanted to be with him first. And he was worried too, worried she expected to much from him, she wanted something from him he was certain he’d never be able to give her. He wanted to but he just didn’t think he could ever fully give himself to anyone. Everyone he’d ever loved or cared for had died and he couldn’t do a damn thing to stop it. He couldn’t allow that to happen to Sakura, she was far too precious to him.

“Sakura” he whispered in her ear as he pulled away. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. Please forgive me.” He said before pulling his mask back over the lower part of his face and pulling away from her a little.

She looked at him clearly in turmoil. She’d wanted it, she could tell he wanted to kiss her to, so why was he apologising like he’d done something wrong? Was it her? Was she a bad kisser?

“I… I don’t understand.” She uttered on the verge of tears again. “Did I do something wrong? Was I not good enough?” she asked her bottom lip trembling from the tears that were about to spill from her eyes.

“Sakura.” He said gently cupping her face in his hand and brushing his thumb backwards and forwards over her cheek, as he stared straight at her. “It’s not that, you did nothing wrong, please don’t think that ok? I was the one who did wrong, I shouldn’t have done that and I’m sorry.”

She looked at him as he said those words and she wanted to believe him, she truly did but she found herself unable to believe him or to hold back the tears pouring down her face.

“Sakura, please…” Kakashi said as he looked at her sadly.

“Stay away from me Kakashi Hatake!” She hissed. “I hate you!”

“Sakura, you don’t mean that. Please don’t say you hate me.” He sighed dejectedly holding her wrist as gently as possible while trying to stop her pulling away from him.

“Let me go!” she squeaked as she looked everywhere but at his face.

“Fine.” Kakashi sighed before gripping her wrist a little tighter and pleading with her first. “Just please tell me you don’t hate me. Tell me you don’t hate me and I’ll let you go.”

“I… I don’t hate you.” She whispered sneaking a quick look at his face as she did so.

She saw a look of relief wash over his face as he released her wrist. She made to run back in the house as he did so but her legs buckled beneath her and her sobs grew more heartbreaking as she collapsed to the floor in a pathetic heap.

Kakashi stood up and walked over to her, he scooped her up into his arms and carried her back to the wall of the house. Leaning back against the now cold hard wall, he hugged her to him tighter than before and ran his hand up and down her arm as he rocked her gently.

“Sakura, I never meant to hurt you, I’d never want to hurt you. You’re the most precious thing in my life. I just don’t think we should be doing this. It’s not right and it’s not fair to you. You should be with someone your own age, someone who can give you everything you deserve.” He said hugging her closer and whispering into her hair.

“But I don’t want anyone else!” She whined “I want you!”

He kissed the top of her head and raised his own to look at the sky again.

“But I don’t deserve someone as special as you.” He whispered, feeling it to be the truth.

“But what if I don’t give a shit about what you think of yourself and what if I think your perfect for me?!” she said looking at him as he stared at the stars.

He chuckled at that and looked down at her thoughtfully. She stared straight back at him, embarrassed by her tear stained face but determined not to be the first to look away. He sighed as he leaned his head forward and kissed her on the forehead.

“You shouldn’t want me Sakura, I’m not good enough for you.”

“Yes you are!” she said sternly as she knelt up to face him again.

“I’ll never be good enough for you, but I promise I’ll always do my best to try and be as worthy of you as I can be.”

At this Sakura gave in, she was too tired to argue anymore. She shivered again and snuggled as close to him as possible as he enveloped her in his strong arms and held her while she fell asleep.

He stayed there till the first rays of the sun shone over the clearing, bringing the dawn with them. He cursed the sun for coming out to early before looking down at Sakura again. Bringing his mouth next to her ear once again he whispered to her gently to wake her up.

“Sakura.”

“Hmm?”

“Its morning, you better get back inside before everyone starts to panic.” He sighed reluctant to let her go but knowing he had to.

“Only if you promise you’re not going to disappear the second I turn round.” She pouted.

“I promise.” He replied with a slight grin.

Sakura got up and moved into the house slowly, as she got to the door she turned to look at him checking he was definitely still there. He chuckled when she did and motioned she should get inside. She sighed and gave him one last look before stepping inside.

As soon as she was out of site he buried his head in his hands and sighed. ‘What the hell are you doing Kakashi? You shouldn’t be corrupting her like this!’ leaning his head back, he heard someone come out through the front door again. He didn’t know if he could handle it if it was Sakura again. Opening his eyes he looked up to see a familiar dark haired shinobi above him.

“Sasuke.” He said politely.

“Kakashi.” He answered looking at him curiously. “Mind if we take a walk?” He asked coolly.

“Sure.” Kakashi said getting up warily. What could the young Uchiha possibly have to talk to him about? Unless…..

They set off between the trees in total silence side by side. Eventually Sasuke stopped and sat down leaning against a tree facing the river, Kakashi followed suit and leant against a tree next to him.

“So what’s up? Not that I’m not glad to see you, I am. But you obviously have something on your mind, so what is it?” He asked eyeing Sasuke curiously.

“Sakura.” Sasuke sighed as if that explained everything.

“Oh?” Kakashi asked raising an eyebrow quizzically.

“She’s in love with you. She’s been in love with you for the last two years and I want what’s best for her. I know what you think of yourself though and I know that you’ll push her away for the sake of making her happy. Or what you think will make her happy.” He stated simply.

“And what exactly makes you think there’s anything between us, from my side at least?”

“Don’t play dumb with me Kakashi Hatake, you know as well as I do that you have feelings for her that go beyond ex-student/teacher. But you should remember she hasn’t been your student since we were all thirteen.”

“Thank you Sasuke, I do realise that but no matter how much I think on that, I also think on the fact that I’m not good enough for her. I’ll never be good enough for her.” He sighed.

“And there in lies your problem.” Sasuke replied looking straight at him. “You constantly think on the fact that everyone you ever loved is gone, dead and there’s nothing you can or could have done about it. But you don’t see it that way, do you? You think that you should have done more and that because of that you’ll never be good enough to find love. So you do your best to avoid it and when a chance for true happiness comes along you’re going to throw it all way just because you feel you’re not good enough and that it’s wrong because at some point, long ago she was your student.”

“You know Sasuke, sometimes I think your genius is over rated.”

“I often think the same thing about you Kakashi. I mean what kind of genius is constantly late and comes up with such excuses as ‘I got lost on the path of life?’” He replied. “But you know it’s always been the village who calls me a genius.”

“Ah, true, but they’ve also called you a psychopath.”

“I’m sure they have and they’re right, which stands to reason they’re right about my genius to, doesn’t it?”

“Ok, you got me there.” Kakashi sighed.

“And so it stands to reason that if I am indeed a psychopath and a genius, I am also right in everything I’ve just said.”

“Hmm”

“I just don’t want to see her hurt. I don’t want to look into her eyes and watch her heart shatter into a thousand pieces. She deserves the chance to have someone who cares for her as much as she cares for them.” He said getting up and preparing to leave.

“Well said, but correct me if I’m wrong wasn’t it you who did exactly that?” He reposted.

“Touché.” He said stopping and looking back at his former sensei. “But don’t you think it’s silly to forgo your chance at happiness just because you’re worried about all the things that could go wrong or because you’re worried how everyone else will see the relationship. I’ve lost my chance at happiness and I’d hate to see two of the people I care most about do the same, especially when it comes to Sakura.” He shrugged. “Just think carefully before you lose her completely for the sake of the opinion of a bunch of people who barely know the real you or even care to know you for that matter.”

“So you’ve turned into our local agony aunt and match maker then? Cant say I was expecting that from the last Uchiha.”

“Yeah well what can I say? There’s some things that I care about, Sakura’s one of them. She means a lot to me and if she’s happy then I’m happy. If she’s hurting well then I have people to beat up, don’t I?” He said in a matter of fact tone.

“You’d fight me for not being with her?” Kakashi asked surprised.

“If I need to, to make you see sense, yes.” He stated without hesitation.

“I have no desire to fight you Sasuke.” He sighed sadly.

“Then do the right thing and at least think about it before you give up. Try doing something that’s good for you for once, something you want, instead of what the rest of the world wants you to do. You never turn down a mission, you always do what’s best for everyone else, and never for yourself. Don’t you wish for once you could do something to make yourself happy?” he asked before taking off into the trees and heading back for the cabin.

Kakashi sat there and thought about the previous conversation. ‘Damn it! How is it that an eighteen year old knows more than me?! How the hell can he understand everything that goes through my mind every time I think about being with Sakura?’ He cursed to himself. ‘He’s right though and you know it.’ His own mind taunted him. Grunting unhappily he thought to himself ‘Well I better return I guess, we need to be heading back to the village.’

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