In the cold of space you find the heat of suns

Apologies if the characters have grown differently in their new environment.

Spacer crews travel the Far Borders and the Fringe of occupied space, trading. Spacing is an ancient and honourable profession carved out by millenniums. Most spacers start out as fourteen-year-old boys seeking a future. Few survive a decade spacing.

50. The Ring

Sasuke flexed his hands, pleased that the damage was almost resolved, and straightened his jacket. After much thought they had decided that he and Naruto would greet the Silver Leaf’s crew at the docking bay. Not including Neji had been a conscious choice; these were allies.

Naruto looked magnificent as always. There was magic in the nonchalant way he wore his tags. Thinking about it, there was magic in the way he wore that amazing body. Sasuke dragged his mind back to business.

The inner door of the airlock opened and Tsunade stepped through. She looked well.

“Sasuke-sama, Naruto-san,” she acknowledged. “Let me introduce my crew.”

She gestured forward a woman of about Kakashi’s age with dark curly hair and a pointed chin. “This is Suzume. She looks after us all.”

Sasuke recognised the way they had used to refer to Iruka when he was still resisted being called queen. “Suzume-san,” he acknowledged.

Her eyes were on Naruto. All their eyes were on Naruto. “Sasuke-sama,” she replied, “Naruto-san.”

Naruto gave a slight bow of acknowledgement.

Tsunade moved onto the next, another woman of similar age but taller with straight dark hair and large, expressive eyes. “Shizune-san is our medico. She is very much looking forward to meeting Rin.”

There was a round of acknowledgements. Tsunade moved on to a younger woman with spiky violet hair and light brown eyes. Her stance yelled fighter. “This is Anko. Anko-san is responsible for security.”

Sasuke noticed that they only merited a curt nod from Anko. This was not someone who gave respect that was not earned.

“These are Temari and Tenten,” Tsunade continued, indicating two young women that Sasuke thought were a similar age to him and Naruto. The blonde, Temari, was staring at Naruto in a way that Sasuke was certain he did not like. The dark one, Tenten, was more concerned with checking out the exits, suggesting another fighter.

There was one other. “As allies and old friends?” Sasuke suggested.

Tsunade smiled and called the red-haired youngster to her side. The girl regarded him with fierce, brown eyes. “This is Tayuya, our cat. She is still a little rough,” Tsunade admitted.

Feral was the word that came to Sasuke.

Sasuke gestured towards the exit. “Please walk with us to where the others are waiting to meet with you.”


Thirty minutes later, Sasuke had decided that the mildest way of describing the scene was ‘lively’. He thought of bringing the meal forward in order to trap the visiting females in their seats but that would not be fair on Choza. Apparently some female spacers, although members of a Traditional crew, regarded males with heterosexual tendencies as fair game.

Suzume was chatting up Ibiki, which was fine. Temari and Tenten obviously hunted as a pair and, having toured the room, were focusing on Shikamaru despite him being plastered to Neji’s side. Worst, Anko was hitting on Kakashi, which had already stretched Iruka’s courtesy past its limits. Sasuke scowled at Tsunade, who gave the impression of being too involved with a combination of whisky and Jiraiya to notice.

There was a sudden scuffle. Sumaru and Tayuya were fighting. Sasuke was surprised that the girl could hold her own. Naruto was there in a flash and had one suspended from each hand with his arms outstretched. He deposited the girl at Suzume’s feet and then brought Sumaru to Sasuke; as he was too young to cat he was Sasuke’s responsibility rather than Iruka’s. Naruto gave the boy a quick shake.

“Do not embarrass us further,” he ordered. “I am ashamed of you.”


Sumaru flushed but his eyes were still wild. Sasuke wondered what the girl had said to him. Unfortunately, Tayuya was already away from Suzume, doubtless bent on causing more trouble. Sasuke decided it was time to do something.

“Stay close to Naruto,” he told Sumaru and began walking with purpose towards Tsunade.

“Tsunade-sama,” he insisted.

She reluctantly turned towards him.

“Could you please ask Anko-san to come over and speak with me?” Sasuke asked her.

She and Jiraiya focused on where Anko was standing. The violet-haired woman was on the verge of moving into touching range of Kakashi.

“That is not good,” observed Jiraiya. “Remember that time on Laratan when Iruka…”

Tsunade was already moving. She swept in and caught Anko’s upper arm.

“Sorry to interrupt, Kakashi-san, Iruka-san. Anko, Sasuke-sama wishes to speak with you.” She guided Anko in Sasuke’s direction. “You idiot,” she hissed, “Iruka may look harmless but he’ll gut you if you touch Kakashi.”

“He isn’t wearing a ring, “ Anko complained, far too loudly. “I don’t hit on the ones wearing rings.”

Sasuke flinched. He saw Jiraiya’s eyes close. There was no way that Iruka had not heard. Sasuke risked a glance. Iruka was as white as someone with his skin colour could become, which was an unpleasant beige.

It was a not a good time for a rerun of the ring issue. Kakashi had never offered a love ring to Iruka, so Iruka refused to contemplate giving one to Kakashi. The lack of a ring rarely caused a problem because one look at Kakashi was enough to stop anyone with basic survival instincts approaching Iruka. Sasuke had never experienced what happened when Kakashi was the target, but obviously Jiraiya and Tsunade had.

Sasuke managed a sensible-sounding query about security while docked, which Anko answered with the minimum number of words. She then turned to Tsunade.

“Who else is off limits?” she demanded.

Tsunade looked helplessly at Sasuke.

“It would be best if you would avoid those who are, at this time, in an exclusive relationship,” Sasuke suggested. “That is Naruto and myself, Kakashi and Iruka, Neji and Shikamaru, Rin and Dan and Asuma and Kurenai. It may also be wise to avoid Hamaki, Terai and Fu. Fu can be unpredictable.”

Anko grimaced. “That’s all the attractive ones except…” She focused on Shino and set off, humming.

“They are always like this?” Sasuke asked.

Tsunade shrugged. “Anko is the worst,” she admitted but she was looking towards where Tenten and Temari were still trying to separate Shikamaru from Neji. It looked like their strategy was for Tenten to distract Neji so that Temari could corner Shikamaru.

Sasuke was considering sending Naruto when Haku bore down on the quartet towing Gai.


The meal was easier. The traditional Uchiha arrangement of low tables made physical interaction less likely. Sasuke was pleased that he had asked Choza to reduce the available whisky by two-thirds. Most of the remainder was making its way down Tsunade and Jiraiya’s throats.

Tayuya’s table manners were appalling.

He heard Anko asking Shino if there would be a party. His denial was uncharacteristically loud and blunt.

“Music would be good,” Tsunade announced, waving her cup. “We’re good at music and singing.”

It was worth trying. Sasuke asked Konohamaru to get his lute.

It worked. Amazingly, Tayuya was phenomenal on the flute, which had the added bonus of keeping her busy. Tenten drummed well. The singing was lively, although Iruka was unusually silent.

It was not a party but there was some dancing. Temari danced well, followed by Terai and Fu. Naruto looked at him and Sasuke nodded.

No one could dance like Naruto. Sasuke’s fingers flew over the strings and the frets. Tayuya’s flute never faltered. Tenten reinforced the rhythm with her drum.

It was joyous.


Iruka sat in the empty hall. He had told Kakashi to go ahead and that he would soon follow. He was so tired. He yearned for his simple, small world on the Silver Leaf but it no longer existed; the Silver Leaf had a crew of loud, crude women. He looked at his duty ring and thought of what it represented, an ever-expanding responsibility where stability was constantly sacrificed for change.

He remembered Naruto dancing and the pride on Sasuke’s face as he watched him.

Iruka wanted to cry.

He went to the Sakura and the bunk he shared with Kakashi. It did not look right, because most of their possessions were in their room on the Oak, and it did not smell right, because he and Kakashi had not been sleeping there.

The woman’s words had struck deep but Kakashi’s behaviour had hurt him more. One overt gesture of affection and the whole sordid scene would have been over. Instead Kakashi had stood there thinking it was a great joke to have a sexy woman hitting on him while Iruka bridled.

By the Lady it was painful to be your life’s love’s second best.

Iruka lay down on the bunk and wept.


Kakashi had seized the opportunity to share a drink with Ibiki and Shino. His eye kept going to the door, expecting Iruka to appear and frown at him. It was only when Ibiki moved to fill his cup for the third time that the uneasy feeling started. He gestured the bottle away and stood up.

Iruka was not in their room, or the shower, or the head, or the bathroom, or the closet. He walked back to the hall but he was not there either. He clung to the hope that their paths had crossed and made his way back to the crew room. All the lovers were in their rooms and there was a full-blown drinking session in the galley. They were playing cards and gambling. His and Iruka’s room was still empty.

He tried searching again before desperation took him to Asuma and Kurenai’s apartment. There was a long delay before Asuma answered his knock.

“Kakashi?” he queried. Then he took in Kakashi’s expression and gestured him inside.

“I can’t find him,” Kakashi admitted.

“Find who?” Asuma asked gently.

“Iruka. He didn’t come back to the crew room. I don’t know where he is.”

Asuma looked at him. “Perhaps he doesn’t want you to find him. After that scene with Anko, who could blame him? I was amazed he held it together for the rest of the evening.”

Kakashi felt himself flush. “Was it that bad?” he asked.

Asuma shook his head. “You are an idiot. Yes, it was that bad. You gave an unattached vibe to a stranger with your lover standing only five paces away. By the Lady, Kakashi, he lives his life for you and sometimes you treat him like he was some casual squeeze.”

“I do not!” Kakashi complained. “Maybe I got it wrong tonight, but he’s my partner. Everyone knows he’s my partner.”

“Anko didn’t,” Asuma reminded him. “You take him for granted, Ka-chan. You never had to win him; you’ve had him since he was a cat. You don’t give him presents. I’ve never heard you pay him a compliment. Everyone knows you have never offered him a ring and everyone thinks they know why.”

Kakashi no longer wanted to listen. “I need to know he is safe,” he stated.

Asuma sighed. “I’ll get dressed. Then we’ll go scan the ship.”


There were only twenty-three people on the Oak and that gave Kakashi the clue he needed. Jiraiya was on the Silver Leaf, which was the last place Iruka would be. He might, however, be on the Sakura.

He was there, asleep. His jacket was carefully hung and his boots neatly placed but he was sleeping in his clothes and his hair was still up. Kakashi retreated and contacted Asuma. He then crept back to Iruka’s side. Running his fingertips across the pillow confirmed what Iruka’s face had already told him; he had cried himself to sleep.

Kakashi knew he often hurt Iruka. He never hit him or used harsh words. It was always what Kakashi did not do or did not say. He would hurt him and Iruka would take a deep breath and continue through the pain as if nothing had happened. Afterwards Kakashi would hold him or make extra effort the next time they fucked. That was their pattern.

This was not. Or perhaps it was. Maybe, if he walked away, Iruka would be there in the galley in the morning offering some half-baked excuse about falling asleep that Kakashi could accept. Everything would continue as normal.

Kakashi rubbed his fingertips together, remembering Iruka’s tears.

Was Iruka’s pain always this bad? Was this what that deep breath usually covered? Was tonight different only because Iruka’s reserves had run low?

Or had the pain been significantly worse because, this time, Kakashi had publicly humiliated his lover?

Could he offer Iruka a ring?

Would Iruka accept it?

Would it help?

It was not true that Iruka had never offered him a ring. It had been soon after Iruka had been promoted to crew. He had been shyly proud that Kakashi had claimed him. Young and innocent, he had bought Kakashi a ring. Kakashi still remembered Iruka’s expression when Kakashi had put it on his right hand rather than his left. Kakashi had not loved Iruka then. He had only claimed him to keep him safe until he could develop into the queen for the Silver Leaf that Kakashi needed.

Kakashi turned and left.


Iruka did not know what had woken him. Sleeping had helped. He put on his boots and jacket. He checked the time. Kakashi might have noticed his absence. He opened a locker and took out the first thing he saw, a tapestry cushion. He would say that he had gone, on impulse, to fetch it from the Sakura, laid down for a few minutes and fallen asleep. It was believable enough that Kakashi would feel no obligation to query it. He washed his face, fixed his hair and set off.

He heard Kakashi’s step before he saw him. There was no time to decide if Kakashi looking for him was good or bad. He schooled his features and raised the cushion.

“I fell asl…” he began before the cushion was ripped from his hands and Kakashi was kissing him. Iruka melted into his arms, all thought of the evening’s disappointments washed away by desire. Kakashi did that to him. He had always done that to him.

Then the familiar pattern broke. Kakashi’s arms moved down his body as he sunk to his knees. He hugged Iruka about the hips. His cheek was against Iruka’s abdomen.

“I am sorry, Ir-chan,” Kakashi whispered, “for every time I have made you feel like that.”

Iruka was not sure what Kakashi meant. He stroked the wild, grey hair.

“I know you went to the Sakura so no one would see how upset you were. So that I would not see how upset you were.”

Iruka’s fingers stilled. It was not that Kakashi knew, it was that Kakashi was admitting that he knew.

Kakashi hugged him closer. “I love you, Ir-chan. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Time slowed. Iruka had long ago given up hope of hearing words like that from Kakashi.

Kakashi looked up at him. Iruka realised that his silence had scared him.

“I love you, ‘Kashi. I have since I was fourteen. You know that.”

“I know that,” Kakashi admitted. He stood up, walked to the discarded cushion and booted it down the corridor. He came back, took Iruka’s hand and started to walk towards the crew quarters.


Kakashi never held hands with him, except for a joke and then only for a few seconds. Iruka looked down at their linked hands and saw the ring on Kakashi’s heart finger. He stopped and pulled Kakashi to face him.

“I don’t want you to wear it just because that purple-haired vamp had no manners,” Iruka told him.

Kakashi shook his head. “It wasn’t true when you gave it to me. It is now. Will you wear mine?”

Iruka smiled. “Of course.” He lifted the hand that bore his duty ring. “It would be nice to have a visual reminder of why I burdened myself with this.” He stepped close and gave Kakashi a quick hug. “I love our family, but it sometimes it can be hard.”

Kakashi pulled the tie from his hair and kissed him gently on the lips.

Iruka felt himself blushing.


They could hear the noise from the galley as they approached the crew room. There was singing and shouting; the unmistakable sounds of a group of drunken gamblers.

Iruka sped up. “It’s the middle of the night. Where did they find that much whisky? Why didn’t Sasuke stop them?”

“He’s probably stuck on Naruto’s knot,” Kakashi reminded him.

“Haku then. I knew he was too young for the responsibility of running a crew room.”

At that exact moment Haku’s voice cut across the noise.

“You should all be ashamed of yourselves! Iruka-sensei takes some private time and look what you do. This stops now. You tidy up and you go to bed or I will tell Iruka-sensei that you fed Kono-kun enough whisky to make him hurl. Shino-san, how could you let that happen? And I am not cleaning up the puke and neither is Konohamaru.”

Iruka surged towards the door but Kakashi stopped him.

“Haku is coping fine. Kono-kun will survive. You can lecture them tomorrow when they have hangovers. Let’s sneak into our room for that ‘private time’.”

Iruka battled with himself for a few moments, then relaxed, smiled and crept with Kakashi towards their room.

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