Strange Hotels
And then I was molested by Gaara
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Ok,
I just want to say that this is a real chapter and it continues after
ch. 4, not the crack ch.5.
Oh
and Vio-chan my dear, sweet beta and friend, in response to your “review” I
only have this to say…
…
…
LISTEN
HEIFER AND LISTEN GOOD, IF I WANT MAGICAL STAR FAIRY BUNNIES TO SWOOP DOWN AND
BISHIE-NAP SASUKE & NARUTO SO THEY CAN SHAG IN PEACE, THEN I’LL DO THAT!
AND I CAN UPDATE ANY DAMN TIME I WANT!
…
…
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>Ok? Lurve ya ta
death. hug hug, kiss kiss, on with the story.
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
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mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>CHAPTER 6 (And then I was molested by
Gaara)
“
Gaara
glanced at Naruto, “What, what?”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“You!
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'> And the “I like my men maskless”
comment, when he started hitting on
you!” Naruto shouted as he whirled around and pointed to Kakashi.
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“YOU!
THIS IS YOUR FAULT, YOU BASTARD!”
Kakashi
looked up from his book with a bored expression, “Impossible. Nothing’s my
fault since I’m perfect in every way.”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>You…fucking…narcissist…
“And
who the hell ever said you were perfect, asshole” Naruto ground out.
Kakashi’s
eye grinned. “Well let’s see.”
Kakashi
scanned the crowd and beckoned to the first person he made eye contact with.
The girl squeed (yes squeed, not squealed. squeeing is worse) and was instantly
in front of Kakashi.
“Yes.”
She breathed.
Lightening
fast, Kakashi drew her to him and romantically dipped her (like
how you dip a tango partner but not like how you dip a chip).
Staring
deeply into the heart-shaped eyes of the fangirl, he whispered, “Do you love
me?”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>Naruto face-planted into the floor.
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
“Oh
yes” she sighed shyly, while her inner self was saying something along the
lines of, HELL YEAH!!! THIS IS WHAT I’M
TALKING ABOUT!
“Do
you think I’m sexy?” Kakashi gently asked.
“HELL
YE- I mean, Oh yes Kakashi” she sweetly finished.
Naruto
gaped in disgusted shock while inwardly thinking, I hope Satan has already reserved you your own special place in hell,
you bastard!
And
Gaara… well his thought pattern was, If I
were to use my Desert Coffin on Naruto’s former sensei, would that be going
against the whole “good guy” thing or would I be doing the world a favor?
“Tell
me how sexy I am.” he continued, caressing the girl’s
cheek.
“With
your gleaming silver hair, smoldering eye, mysterious mask, lean yummy body and
your sexy voice, you’re a girl’s wet dream.”
“Are
you saying that I only interest women?”
Frantically
Naruto looked about the room. Gonna…vomit…must
find…trash can…
“Oh,
no Kakashi!” the fangirl gushed. “Your sexiness is like a river that both males
and females drown in, your ass is like a greek gods,
and you-you-” Kakashi’s face was getting closer and closer to hers, causing her
to stutter. “y-you-you’re perfect!” she exclaimed,
before a fountain of blood whooshed from her nose and she abrubtly passed out.
Kakashi
dropped her and offhandedly said, “Thanks babe that will be all.”
Naruto
stared at the unconscious woman. “Jesus, sensei did you just make that girl
come?”
“Sounds
like it. Anyway the lesson to be learned today is that my perfection is
obvious, even to complete strangers.”
…
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>Someone get me a tourniquet, I think
my sanity is bleeding.
“You
know,” Gaara stated offhandedly, interrupting his houseguests thoughts. “
wasn’t one of your fans.”
A
gleam of interest shined in Kakashi’s eye.
“I’ve
never gotten any complaints.”
“The
people you screw probably couldn’t tell the difference between great sex and a
hole in the wall.”
Naruto
mentally cheered on his friend. That’s it
Gaara, verbally kick his ass!
“Well
this isn’t something that can be proven with words alone so… how about I give
you a demonstration?”
“Nice
try, sensei!” laughed Naruto. “Like Gaara would-”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“When?”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
Naruto
gaped at his closet obliterating friend.
Kakashi’s
eye grinned, “Well when are you free?”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“Now.”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“My place or yours?”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“Yours.”
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>
“Well
then, what are we waiting for?”
Gaara
turned to Naruto and said, “Call a cab and get a ride back to the house, tell
the driver to charge the fare to my name. Don’t wait up for me. See ya.”
Naruto
nodded mutely, then stared as his now best friend left
to go have wild crazy sex with his ex-sensei. He wondered where it all went
wrong. He wondered how he let this happen. He wondered…
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>“How the fuck am I supposed to get in
the house when you have the keys to that fortress! Huh!? GAARA!!!”
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Oh
shit… I forgot. Ok so yeah the title of this chapter is named “And then I was
molested by Gaara” and when I first started writing this I had every intention
of having Gaara molest the hell out of our favorite blond, but then it took
much longer then I was expecting to finish this up and school… yeah. I forgot. SUE
ME! ANYWAY, I have every intention of having Gaara molest Naruto somehow… and
have this story still be completely SasuNaru. So look forward to that and! Next
chapter we start getting into the actual plot (I kno~oow. Plot.
Me? WTF!?!) Oh and more detail on Kakashi and Gaara
for latas!
mso-bidi-font-family:"Arial Unicode MS"'>TTFN.
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