Viva Forever

~Chapter 6~

Sasuke drove as if in a trance. Naruto’s words echoed repeatedly within his head, engrossing his concentration, and he was not completely conscious of where he was heading but reliant on his body to take him where he needed to go. It led him back to the hotel where he was staying and after the car was parked and the engine put into hibernation, Sasuke remained inside the vehicle for many minutes later. He just stared straight ahead at the dense shrubbery that lined the thick, brick wall and continued to brood in silent contemplation.

‘…If he considered you half the friend you think he is then he never would have forgotten you.”

He couldn’t argue with that logic even though it had been the utterances of one, Naruto Uzumaki but he stubbornly refused to accept it as truth. Just seeing the boy, turned man, after all these years brought back his past emotions and he felt as strongly about him as he did back then.

Time barely changed him and he was still much shorter and still just as waif-like as he had been fifteen years ago. His large, lavender eyes still possessed that naïve ignorance that invited anyone to take advantage of him and he moved with that familiar, graceful elegance that exhibited his vulnerability, for all manner of predators to see. Strategically, Sasuke had always been his shield, the hard shell that protected the weak flesh of the tortoise. He was eternally grateful that the young man had managed to survive in this harsh world without him, but that thought depressed him as much as it relieved him and his grip upon the steering wheel tightened until his knuckles shone white.

Neji no longer needed his protection even though he’d been blindly dependant on him in the past.

But what did that mean for him now that he no longer had a ‘purpose’ in life? For fifteen years, Sasuke had been retaining his role as Neji’s guardian angel in hopes that, one day, they would meet again. For fifteen years he pined, prayed and longed for that little boy that filled those scant, two weeks of his childhood with uncalculated bliss and, for fifteen years, Sasuke Uchiha continued to love Neji Hyuuga unconditionally and that love grew immeasurably when he was old enough to understand the true meaning of that word in all its contexts.

He winced at the pain that shot through his skull and he realized that he’d been gritting his teeth, a habit akin to a feral dog that refused to give up his bone, and Sasuke was not about to give up Neji so easily.

If he planned on winning the Hyuuga back, he was going to have to approach him with a white flag. They had parted on less than reasonable terms last night and he didn’t want to scare the other off if he saw him approaching. Sasuke exited his vehicle and, with his new course of action in mind, he made his way towards the privacy of his reserved room. As much as he valued Naruto’s opinion, he respected his brother’s advice even more and he was the only one he could talk to because he was the only other person who knew about their secret relationship.

He kicked off his shoes at the door and maneuvered through the dimly illuminated room by memory, avoiding his suitcase, a table and that damn potted plant that always brushed its leaves against him whenever he passed. A flick of the switch on the bedside table filled the room with its warm, orange glow but the artificial light was made faint against the stronger orange, rays of the setting sun. It would be dark soon though and any additional light was welcome.

“Come on Itachi, pick up,” Sasuke muttered impatiently into the receiver. It was just like his brother to purposely miss his calls just to piss him off and even though he was now a successful, twenty-six year old business man with the responsibility of a multi-million dollar, international company on his hands, he still behaved in that sardonic attitude towards his little brother.

Sure enough, the second time Sasuke called, he answered with a bitter, “What?”

“Hey, Itachi. It’s me… Sasuke,” was his younger sibling’s greeting and, for some reason, the concept of sharing his concerns paralyzed his courage.

There was a soft, exasperated sigh on the other end, quickly followed by a scathingly dry, “No shit?” and he carefully spaced each word while specifically enunciating each syllable much like one would say ‘whoop-dee-fucking-doo’.

“Did I call at a bad time?” Sasuke asked, already tired of the other man’s sarcastic nature.

“Everytime you call is a bad time for me,” he grumbled. “What do you want?”

“Nothing really. I just-” and he was cut off by the sound of a click and a dead line. Sasuke’s temper flared and he punched the buttons on the telephone so hard that it slid upon the polished, bed-side table. “You son-of-a-bitch, stop hanging up on me,” the young brunette raged the second his brother picked up the call. He hated it whenever Itachi did that.

“You can curse me all you want but don’t bring mother into this,” was his drawled response to the insult. “Besides, you said you didn’t want anything so why the hell should I let you waste my time just because you’ve got no friends to talk to?”

That was actually a low-blow but, for the sake of soliciting his brother’s advice, Sasuke decided to let it roll off his back.

“Fine! I’ll get right to the point then,” Sasuke snapped and brought his legs up onto the bed so he could comfortably support his back against the head board. “Do you remember Neji?”

There was a lengthy pause from his brother’s end and Sasuke wondered if he’d been hung up on again.

“Neji?” Itachi finally asked. The name didn’t seem to ring a bell.

“You remember, Neji,” he insisted. “The boy that I married.”

“Ohh, the annoying, neighbour kid,” the elder Uchiha agreed once the hint triggered a particularly humorous memory. “Yeah, I remember him. I also remember, after he left, you became depressed and pretty much isolated yourself inside your room,” and a low chuckle traveled from Iachchi’s chest and into Sasuke’s ear. “Those were the best four months of my life.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes and, for a moment, wondered if seeking his brother’s help was actually worth all his scathing remarks.

“So, what about him?” Itachi then asked, wanting to hurry this along so he could bring the conversation to an abrupt end.

“I… I saw him yesterday,” Sasuke admitted and a scowl etched deep within his face when he recalled Neji’s negative reaction towards him.

“Oh really? How is he?” and if Sasuke didn’t know any better he’d have sworn that Itachi actually sounded interested.

He could have said he was fine, or that he hadn’t changed much. Hell, he could have said that Neji said ‘Hi’, but instead he whined, “He doesn’t remember me.”

There was another lengthy pause before a flat “So?” and Sasuke’s despondency melted away as his ire erupted.

“What do you mean, ‘So’?” he raged, practically screaming into the receiver. “Before Neji left he promised me he wouldn’t forget me, but he did. I never forgot him Itachi! He broke his promise to me and he betrayed me.”

He’d hoped that his little rant would have swayed his brother to see his side of the argument because he wanted there to be at least one other person who felt the same way he did. Someone else who agreed that he was right and Neji was wrong, but Itachi’s barked laughter that rang in his ears only relayed that his last life-line thought him as big a fool as everyone else did.

“Listen to yourself, Sasuke. You sound just like a child,” the older man snickered ironically at his sibling’s immaturity. “You were only what… six years old when you first met Neji,” he quickly calculated the time within his head before continuing. “You knew each other for about two weeks and now, almost fifteen years later you expect him to remember you? Get real, little brother,” he scoffed.

Sasuke wanted to rip the telephone from its cord, toss it out the window then break into a conniption fit upon the bed. Why did no one sympathize with him? Why was everyone making him out to be some obsessive-compulsive, mental patient a few marbles scant of becoming a perseverant stalker?

“I can’t believe you called me just to bitch about something as insignificant as this,” Itachi went on and as deeply annoyed as he sounded, Sasuke could tell that he was harvesting sadistic pleasure from his misery. “Thanks for wasting the last five minutes of my life.”

“I only called for your advice,” Sasuke retorted, his voice dripping with venom.

“Oh, you wanted my advice? Why didn’t you say so?” Itachi almost purred, his voice softening significantly, but Sasuke knew that it was only ruse to get him to lower his defenses before he dropped the bomb. “Here’s what I think you should do. Since you’ve literally wasted the last fifteen years pining after some over-protected, little, fairy twink, you should forget him, start over and Get.A.Fucking.Life! Is that relevant enough advice for you, Sasuke?”

Rhetorical question. He knew he didn’t have to answer and even if he could find a catty comment, Itachi didn’t give him the chance to use it.

He didn’t bother to call his brother back this time. He’d probably had a bad day and was looking for someone to take it out on. Maybe if he waited for his brother to settle into a calmer frame of mind maybe he could get him to see his side…

Now, he was just being unreasonable and he knew it. As much as he truly did value his brother’s opinion, Sasuke didn’t agree with him just because he said so but because he was finally starting to believe what Naruto said, what his Itachi said and what his rationale said.

Sasuke was never one to ignore that part of his mind, he was the type of person that went with facts and figures as opposed to gut instincts and dumb luck but the only reason he refused to listen this time was because he wanted to obey his heart instead.

The obnoxious laughter of the telephone signal echoed within his head, jumbling his thoughts and snapping him back to the real world and after Sasuke hung up and looked around the large, elegant room the reality of just how empty and cold his life was, smacked him hard like a ton of bricks.

His inner child became lonely again and Sasuke drew his knees up to wrap his arms around his legs in a comforting manner. He frowned as he stared at his reflection in the blank television screen, much like a mirror that bore the resemblance of his pitiable existence.

It was only him and no one else.

For the second time, he felt as if he’d lost Neji all over again and for a second time he felt as if a part of him had died.

Sasuke sighed heavily and gathered what little dignity he possessed. There was no reason for him to remain here in this place that had quickly become a tomb for his hopeful emotions and if he were to follow through on his brother’s counsel then he’d have to get as far away from Neji as possible.

They did say ‘Out of sight; out of mind’ right?

He reached out, rather reluctantly, for the phone again and dialed the number for the front desk. What little emotion that barely survived within his hardening heart begged him to reconsider and tried to persuade him to confer with Neji one more time but his mind had already been changed and he refused to allow himself to suffer that humiliation and rejection for a second time.

It hurt too much.

He’d almost forgotten who or why he had even made this call and the front clerk’s annoyed tone of voice let him know that he had, most likely, just interrupted him from something more important and that, in turn, made him feel even more miserable. He arranged with him to check out and send a taxi within the hour. There hadn’t been a need to bring that much luggage and it wouldn’t take long to toss his clothes and toiletries inside a case.

After curtly informing him his instructions would be followed, the young man hung up a little too quickly and, purely out of force of habit, Sasuke almost called Itachi.

He still hated having to admit to himself that his brother was right but he was also right in saying, in no uncertain terms, that he was an idiot. Damn, there were people in this world going through issues a hundred times more grievous than this and here he was acting as if fate’s cruelty decided to curse only him.

He’d be alright, he just needed to dust off and start over, like Itachi said. Neji wasn’t the only one who could forget about their relationship and pretend it never existed. He wasn’t the only one who could move on as if they didn’t mean anything to each other. Sasuke too could create a brighter future for himself if he put in the effort, and Neji… he could stay in the past.