Falling away from me

Sorry it's taken a such a horrendously long time to update. If you skipped the last chapter, Lee had a breakdown and Gai came home to find all was seemingly fine, except for a drop of blood on the bathroom floor. In this chapter, Gai finds out what happened while he was gone.

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Gai rolled over and stretched in the warm sunlight that was trickling in through Lee's window. His hand brushed the still sleeping youth and Lee made a small sound of pain. Gai was awake instantly, his heart racing. No. Couldn't be. He slowly moved the blankets down, uncovering one of Lee's arms. With the care of a neurosurgeon, he pulled up the sleeve. An inch up, the cuts started. Gai made a despairing sound and went to the window to call for a messenger bird. He wrote upon a slip of paper ' Honored Tsunade, my beloved student Lee has once again lapsed into a horrible pit of despair. I fear this time we must put him in the hospital so he may be kept from further harming himself. Please come to his home as soon as you are able. Your humble operative, Gai' He fastened it to the bird's foot and sent it to the Hokage's tower.

He moved about the apartment quickly, first getting Lee's duffel bag out from under the bed. He put in it a weeks worth of socks and underwear, a toothbrush, hairbrush, pajamas, 4 t-shirts and 4 shorts. He had just zipped it up when the door slammed open. Tsunade was NOT a morning person. Shizune followed, carrying a bag of what he assumed to be supplies.

"Where's the brat?" Tsunade growled. Gai gestured to the bedroom door. She walked in and turned on the overhead light. She yanked off the covers with no regard and turned to her assistant. "Scissors." They were handed to her, bandage scissors that were designed to protect the skin from cutting. She started at his legs, slicing the body suit up to the middle. When it was all cut off and Lee was blinking up at them sleepily she whistled. "This is worse than last time. You really did a number on yourself, kid. Lee realized what was happening and jerked to cover himself. (I assume he goes commando under all that spandex, ever seen an underwear line on Lee?) Then he got angry and forgot his modesty. He leaped from the bed and shot himself toward Gai, aiming for his neck. But his past few days of poor nutrition were catching up to him. He barely touched his sensei before he found himself pinned to the ground.

"How COULD you! After all we've been through how could you call her!"

"You selfish child! Can't you see I love you? Every time you hurt yourself you stab me through the heart! It has to stop!" Gai stopped cold. Had he really just confessed his love to his former student, a man fifteen years his junior? The look on Lee's face said he had. Shizune was expressionless, but Tsunade was trying to suppress a smirk. Gai got up and bolted out the door. He may have just ruined everything that mattered to him.

Lee sat in shock as he was bandaged and dressed and then carried out of his apartment. He had never realized that Gai felt that way about him. Sure, they had sex every once in a while, but that wasn't anything out of the ordinary. Shinobi were known for having sex whenever the circumstances were right. He didn't fight as he was checked into the hospital, or as the i.v. found his vein. When the sedative began to take effect, he was grateful.

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Iruka blinked at the man standing on his porch. It sure looked like Gai, bright green bodysuit and orange leg warmers. But Gai was never seen with silent tears streaming down his face, nor without his trademark smile. He hadn't said youth once, he hadn't struck a pose. Just asked for Kakashi in a small, beaten voice. Iruka wordlessly led him into their kitchen and poured a glass of sake for him. He was about to put the sake away, thought about it, and left it on the table.

Kakashi was in their bedroom, reading a book on self control. Iruka was making him leave his Icha Icha home for Shino and Kiba's wedding.

"Who was at the door, 'Ruka?"

"You'd better see for yourself. Be prepared for a shock." Kakashi raised his eyebrow at Iruka and put the book away. He walked into the kitchen just in time to see Gai polish off the bottle of sake he had bought yesterday. One of those big ones.

"You didn't." When Gai looked up at him woth sorrowful eyes, Kakashi sighed. "You did. Why?"

"It just sort of slipped out." Kakashi walked over to the cupboard and pulled out another bottle of sake and 2 more glasses. He gestured for Iruka to join them at the table. "Neji left him, the day before I got sent on that mission. He called me over and I stayed with him that night. I came home last night and everything looked fine, but this morning I found out he'd been cutting himself. He cut everywhere he could reach that is covered by clothing." He paused to down another glass of sake. "I called Tsunade, he went nuclear, I had to restrain him. He demanded to know why I called Tsunade, and the words were out of my mouth before I could stop them. I just had visions of finding him dead by his own had, or taking a mission and purposely not coming back from it." He let his head thump down to the table. Iruka and Kakashi exchanged a glance.

You can stay with us. Everything will work out, but for now why don't you go try to sleep. You're still recovering from that mission, and all this on top of that isn't good," Iruka said softly. Gai nodded, and he and Kakashi helped the big man up and into the guest bedroom. When they got him settled in and came back out to the kitchen, Kakashi wrapped his arms around Iruka.

"He's strong, he'll figure out what to do."

"He may be strong," Iruka said, "but this is pain different from what he's used to handling."

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Comments? Questions? R&R please?