Through the Eyes of the Insane
folder
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
8
Views:
1,241
Reviews:
50
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult +
Chapters:
8
Views:
1,241
Reviews:
50
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Chapter Six
A.N. OMG! THANK GOD SOMEONE CAN SPELL! Seriously, I know for a fact that I had spelled awkward wrong when I spelled it aquard. But I’ve put it up before and not ONE person bothered to tell me how to spell it… I put the stupid word through spellchecker (three different one’s and I spelled it different ways too) and I tried dictionary.com… I tried google… lot of good that did me. FINALLY in ONE shot! TWO people tell me how to spell the frickin word! THANK YOU!
Seriously, it pissed me off so much forever… so, for that, I dedicate this chapter to you two. GO JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox.
TO JDSakuraKLi - Thanks for the offer for the beta. The problem with me and beta’s is I am a very impatient person when it comes to this kind of thing. When I write a chapter, I organize it and put it together in my head so that it only takes like an hour to type out, and then BOOM! Its up like five minutes later. So for me to actually send it to someone to beta, I would be just so horribly antsy and… I’ve tried it. It aint pretty. But if you want to just read it as I put the chapters up and point out anything you see, that would be awesome. You’ve saved my butt twice now. I love you!
This chapter is basically a fluff and funny chapter for JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox cause they told me how to spell the frickin word right. Thanks you two. I’ve been trying to spell that word for a long time, and never once have I gotten it right.
Since I got like three reviews on the short mini snippet of stupidness, I’m going to continue because it was well received.
Anyway, on with the actual story!
Through the Eyes of the Insane ~ Chapter Six
Now, Sasuke was seething. And he had only made it past the second story. He had just listened to Naruto get through the man eating toilet story, and was now watching the blond cry with mirth, wanting to just punch the guy out. HE didn’t find it funny in the least, but apparently the loudmouth did. It would figure.
“But that story isn’t as good as the one where I came home and you were hunting socks.” Sasuke took a deep breath and counted backwards from ten to keep in his seat as he listened on.
Naruto took a deep breath and continued on with the story.
~~Flashback~~
Sighing, Naruto unlocked the door to the house, the same way he did every day. But today, he smiled before he opened the door, knowing he would at least have someone to talk to tonight besides his moody cat. He pushed the wooden door open and froze, staring at the sight that greeted him in the hallway.
Sasuke stood there in a pair of boxers, the same one’s he slept in every night, holding a stick and crouching down, spying around the corner. The raven turned his head at the sound at the door, and Naruto cocked an eyebrow at what the boy had done to his face.
Apparently, he hadn’t hidden the paint that Konohamaru had left there last time he had babysat well enough, as Sasuke had found it and decided to use it as war paint. He had a black streak running down his nose and one black and one red streak on each cheek. There was a black dot beneath his mouth, and finally, one thick red one down the center of his chest.
Severe curiosity broke out over Naruto’s brain, and, so as not to disturb the boy in whatever adventure he had taken up today, closed the door quietly and tiptoed over to where Sasuke was, peeking around the corner as the other was doing. He couldn’t see anything, so his irrational fear that Sasuke had finally had enough with the cat vanished, but the curiosity got stronger, and he couldn’t keep himself from asking any longer.
“What are you doing?” he kept his voice at a whisper, and watched as Sasuke practically dove to behind the couch in a very bad James Bond impression. He watched as the boy peaked out from behind the couch, then locked eyes with him as he finally looked his way.
“Socks run away. Sasuke hunt socks for Naruto.”
It took a few minutes for the blond to realize what Sasuke was talking about, but then a memory of talking to Sasuke came back to him.
About two days previous, Naruto had been frustrated over loosing the pairs for his socks… again… to his ever vengeful dryer. He wasn’t sure what he had done, but the stupid thing kept eating the socks. Sasuke had asked what was wrong, and instead of getting into the theory of quantum physics, (which Naruto strongly believed had to do with missing socks from the dryer) instead, he told the boy that socks ran away when you put them in the dryer sometimes. It seemed Sasuke had taken this to heart.
Naruto was broken out of his thoughts by a Zina battle cry, and watched, unable to move as Sasuke lunged from behind the couch, throwing the stick in his hand with amazing accuracy, piercing a random sock that just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, laying on the back of the chair beside the TV.
Naruto couldn’t help it. He doubled over, clutching his stomach, briefcase completely forgotten, laughing himself to death. Stitches formed in his side, and it took a full ten minutes for the blond to calm down enough to stand, though when he did, he needed the walls help and he was still clutching his sides. Tears rolled down his face as he looked at Sasuke, who stood there, a mighty warrior of the living room, in all his mostly naked glory, painted on and holding his prey. The poor sock didn’t see it coming.
“Ok, Sasuke. I think you need to stop watching TV.” The fact that the boy had combined the moves of James Bond (albeit poorly) and the battle cry of Zina was a clear sign that there was too much TV in the boy’s life.
Sasuke’s eyes widened and he dropped the sock on the arm rest of the chair to clutch the TV instead. “You no take away T-Vision.”
Ah yes. T-Vision. The combination of Television and TV that Sasuke had managed to come up with. The boy stood there glaring at Naruto with all his icy pride (which wasn’t very much) until Naruto raised an eyebrow.
“So your going to let the sock get away to protect your T-Vision instead?”
Sasuke immediately realized the mistake and let go, swirling around to find the escapee. Which he again, speared with his stick.
Naruto was clutching his sides all night.
~~End Flashback~~
Naruto was crying again. He still pretty much died every time he thought about that one. It had been one of the most interesting and funny things he had ever seen in his entire life. "It took a while to figure out where you got the stick from, but apparently you had seen it from outside because my walking stick was gone. But there was something even more interesting left there in its place. Apparently your other self doesn't know what a sliding glass door is or that there was one there, because I found an entire body print on the glass." He laughed even harder just thinking about how it would have gotten there.
This only made Sasuke’s anger rise even more.
“It was just… just…” he burst out into fits of laughter again, mumbling stuff when he could get a word in about cute and adorable and completely unexpected, but for the next ten minutes, that’s all the raven was able to make out of the useless blabbering that the blond seemed so intent to let fall from his mouth.
He rubbed his temples, preying that it didn’t get any worse than that.
~~Two hours later~~
Ok, so it didn’t get worse than that. For that, Sasuke was thankful. All the other story’s were perfectly explainable and the blond didn’t have too much to do with them at all.
He had accidentally hit the record button on the answering machine, recorded himself, then got scared that the machine was trying to steal his voice every time it picked up. Completely reasonable and not all that funny, especially since Naruto had to buy a new answering machine after that one. Well, it was funny to Sasuke.
The arctic in the freezer and the desert in the microwave were also completely reasonable and even self explanatory, and to be honest, he had expected the people living in the TV right from the first story.
The cat really WAS the demons incarnate, and Sasuke just shook his head every time he tried to explain the ninja thing. Even Sasuke was at a complete loss for that one. He had no idea what the hell the blond was talking about, and apparently no idea what his other self was talking about.
The worst one after the first three had to be god in the cupboard.
Apparently, Sasuke had found his way into the food pantry, and had made a habit of getting himself snacks randomly throughout the day. Reasonable and predictable. Naruto had noticed this, and at one point brought home some new snacks for him, filling the pantry to the point of bursting, only ten minutes after Sasuke had retrieved something from the almost empty thing. Naruto had done so on his lunch hour and Sasuke had been absorbed in Zina, so he hadn’t noticed Naruto’s short arrival and departure, so when he went back for food, he had marveled in the now full cupboard. The gods had blessed him and given him more food.
Well, that was how Naruto had put it. Which is apparently how his other self had put it. Not really the blonds fault, so he wouldn’t hold that one against him.
But the other three… Sasuke shook his head, thinking back on the way the blond had described everything. It had been in quite good detail, and it made him almost wonder if the blond had a photographic memory, which he believed to be impossible since he couldn’t find the kettle on the stove when he went back for more tea.
Then something clicked. The way Naruto had described the situations, and the way that he had described Sasuke after each situation… oh this was so not happening.
Naruto sat down again, with his fourth cup of tea and sighed, leaning back wiping his eyes again to keep the tears from getting too far. “But honestly Sasuke, it really was hilarious.”
Sasuke looked up at the blond with a smirk. “You really are stupid aren’t you?”
That earned him a glare. “What the hell are you talking about. I took you in and taught you what you needed to know. What is your problem?”
Sasuke’s smirk only grew. “You’ve got a thing for the other me.”
It was a simple statement, said with a flat voice and a level tone, but that one statement brought a lot of shit crashing down on the blonds head.
He thought back to the way he had viewed the other Sasuke. Cute, adorable, funny, and mix that in with the urge to protect him and keep him here, even though it was evident he had come from a loony bin… and then it made sense. And to top it all off, it had been the bastard himself who had figured it out before Naruto.
The blond looked up, determined not to loose to the other again.
“I don’t know what your talking about.” He stood, moving to the living room, Sasuke following close behind him, both of their tea’s completely forgotten on the kitchen table.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A.N. Phew. That all kinda came out in one giant blurb.
Anyway, that was for you two JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox for your excellent help.
And now what you’ve all been waiting for.
EPISODE TWO! ~ Part two of three ~ The copy ninja meets his match
Kakashi: *leaning against the wall to the copy room, whistling a toon and waiting for someone*
Orochimaru: *Walks in and places his sheet of paper on the photocopier*
Kakashi: *watching intently*
Orochimaru: *quickly presses a few buttons and his copies come out*
Kakashi: *wasn’t able to catch which buttons he’s supposed to push*
Orochimaru: *takes his copies and walks out*
Kakashi: *walks over to the machine and puts his paper on the copy bed* *hit’s a few buttons*
Machine: *goes dead*
Kakashi: So you’ll work for the Michael Jackson wannabe but you wont work for me!? *kicks the machine*
Machine: *no response*
Kakashi: *lifts the lid and moves the paper to lean down over the copy bed* *Hand accidentally presses the copy button*
Machine: *lid slams down on Kakashi and begins copying*
Kakashi: *face is smashed against the copy bed*
Machine: *spits out a bunch of copies of Kakashi’s squished face*
Kakashi: *pulls his head from the vial machine* you’ve won this round.
~Fin
Lol. Alright, so the copy nin is again thwarted by the photocopy machine. Will his third try be successful? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!
Seriously, it pissed me off so much forever… so, for that, I dedicate this chapter to you two. GO JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox.
TO JDSakuraKLi - Thanks for the offer for the beta. The problem with me and beta’s is I am a very impatient person when it comes to this kind of thing. When I write a chapter, I organize it and put it together in my head so that it only takes like an hour to type out, and then BOOM! Its up like five minutes later. So for me to actually send it to someone to beta, I would be just so horribly antsy and… I’ve tried it. It aint pretty. But if you want to just read it as I put the chapters up and point out anything you see, that would be awesome. You’ve saved my butt twice now. I love you!
This chapter is basically a fluff and funny chapter for JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox cause they told me how to spell the frickin word right. Thanks you two. I’ve been trying to spell that word for a long time, and never once have I gotten it right.
Since I got like three reviews on the short mini snippet of stupidness, I’m going to continue because it was well received.
Anyway, on with the actual story!
Through the Eyes of the Insane ~ Chapter Six
Now, Sasuke was seething. And he had only made it past the second story. He had just listened to Naruto get through the man eating toilet story, and was now watching the blond cry with mirth, wanting to just punch the guy out. HE didn’t find it funny in the least, but apparently the loudmouth did. It would figure.
“But that story isn’t as good as the one where I came home and you were hunting socks.” Sasuke took a deep breath and counted backwards from ten to keep in his seat as he listened on.
Naruto took a deep breath and continued on with the story.
~~Flashback~~
Sighing, Naruto unlocked the door to the house, the same way he did every day. But today, he smiled before he opened the door, knowing he would at least have someone to talk to tonight besides his moody cat. He pushed the wooden door open and froze, staring at the sight that greeted him in the hallway.
Sasuke stood there in a pair of boxers, the same one’s he slept in every night, holding a stick and crouching down, spying around the corner. The raven turned his head at the sound at the door, and Naruto cocked an eyebrow at what the boy had done to his face.
Apparently, he hadn’t hidden the paint that Konohamaru had left there last time he had babysat well enough, as Sasuke had found it and decided to use it as war paint. He had a black streak running down his nose and one black and one red streak on each cheek. There was a black dot beneath his mouth, and finally, one thick red one down the center of his chest.
Severe curiosity broke out over Naruto’s brain, and, so as not to disturb the boy in whatever adventure he had taken up today, closed the door quietly and tiptoed over to where Sasuke was, peeking around the corner as the other was doing. He couldn’t see anything, so his irrational fear that Sasuke had finally had enough with the cat vanished, but the curiosity got stronger, and he couldn’t keep himself from asking any longer.
“What are you doing?” he kept his voice at a whisper, and watched as Sasuke practically dove to behind the couch in a very bad James Bond impression. He watched as the boy peaked out from behind the couch, then locked eyes with him as he finally looked his way.
“Socks run away. Sasuke hunt socks for Naruto.”
It took a few minutes for the blond to realize what Sasuke was talking about, but then a memory of talking to Sasuke came back to him.
About two days previous, Naruto had been frustrated over loosing the pairs for his socks… again… to his ever vengeful dryer. He wasn’t sure what he had done, but the stupid thing kept eating the socks. Sasuke had asked what was wrong, and instead of getting into the theory of quantum physics, (which Naruto strongly believed had to do with missing socks from the dryer) instead, he told the boy that socks ran away when you put them in the dryer sometimes. It seemed Sasuke had taken this to heart.
Naruto was broken out of his thoughts by a Zina battle cry, and watched, unable to move as Sasuke lunged from behind the couch, throwing the stick in his hand with amazing accuracy, piercing a random sock that just happen to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, laying on the back of the chair beside the TV.
Naruto couldn’t help it. He doubled over, clutching his stomach, briefcase completely forgotten, laughing himself to death. Stitches formed in his side, and it took a full ten minutes for the blond to calm down enough to stand, though when he did, he needed the walls help and he was still clutching his sides. Tears rolled down his face as he looked at Sasuke, who stood there, a mighty warrior of the living room, in all his mostly naked glory, painted on and holding his prey. The poor sock didn’t see it coming.
“Ok, Sasuke. I think you need to stop watching TV.” The fact that the boy had combined the moves of James Bond (albeit poorly) and the battle cry of Zina was a clear sign that there was too much TV in the boy’s life.
Sasuke’s eyes widened and he dropped the sock on the arm rest of the chair to clutch the TV instead. “You no take away T-Vision.”
Ah yes. T-Vision. The combination of Television and TV that Sasuke had managed to come up with. The boy stood there glaring at Naruto with all his icy pride (which wasn’t very much) until Naruto raised an eyebrow.
“So your going to let the sock get away to protect your T-Vision instead?”
Sasuke immediately realized the mistake and let go, swirling around to find the escapee. Which he again, speared with his stick.
Naruto was clutching his sides all night.
~~End Flashback~~
Naruto was crying again. He still pretty much died every time he thought about that one. It had been one of the most interesting and funny things he had ever seen in his entire life. "It took a while to figure out where you got the stick from, but apparently you had seen it from outside because my walking stick was gone. But there was something even more interesting left there in its place. Apparently your other self doesn't know what a sliding glass door is or that there was one there, because I found an entire body print on the glass." He laughed even harder just thinking about how it would have gotten there.
This only made Sasuke’s anger rise even more.
“It was just… just…” he burst out into fits of laughter again, mumbling stuff when he could get a word in about cute and adorable and completely unexpected, but for the next ten minutes, that’s all the raven was able to make out of the useless blabbering that the blond seemed so intent to let fall from his mouth.
He rubbed his temples, preying that it didn’t get any worse than that.
~~Two hours later~~
Ok, so it didn’t get worse than that. For that, Sasuke was thankful. All the other story’s were perfectly explainable and the blond didn’t have too much to do with them at all.
He had accidentally hit the record button on the answering machine, recorded himself, then got scared that the machine was trying to steal his voice every time it picked up. Completely reasonable and not all that funny, especially since Naruto had to buy a new answering machine after that one. Well, it was funny to Sasuke.
The arctic in the freezer and the desert in the microwave were also completely reasonable and even self explanatory, and to be honest, he had expected the people living in the TV right from the first story.
The cat really WAS the demons incarnate, and Sasuke just shook his head every time he tried to explain the ninja thing. Even Sasuke was at a complete loss for that one. He had no idea what the hell the blond was talking about, and apparently no idea what his other self was talking about.
The worst one after the first three had to be god in the cupboard.
Apparently, Sasuke had found his way into the food pantry, and had made a habit of getting himself snacks randomly throughout the day. Reasonable and predictable. Naruto had noticed this, and at one point brought home some new snacks for him, filling the pantry to the point of bursting, only ten minutes after Sasuke had retrieved something from the almost empty thing. Naruto had done so on his lunch hour and Sasuke had been absorbed in Zina, so he hadn’t noticed Naruto’s short arrival and departure, so when he went back for food, he had marveled in the now full cupboard. The gods had blessed him and given him more food.
Well, that was how Naruto had put it. Which is apparently how his other self had put it. Not really the blonds fault, so he wouldn’t hold that one against him.
But the other three… Sasuke shook his head, thinking back on the way the blond had described everything. It had been in quite good detail, and it made him almost wonder if the blond had a photographic memory, which he believed to be impossible since he couldn’t find the kettle on the stove when he went back for more tea.
Then something clicked. The way Naruto had described the situations, and the way that he had described Sasuke after each situation… oh this was so not happening.
Naruto sat down again, with his fourth cup of tea and sighed, leaning back wiping his eyes again to keep the tears from getting too far. “But honestly Sasuke, it really was hilarious.”
Sasuke looked up at the blond with a smirk. “You really are stupid aren’t you?”
That earned him a glare. “What the hell are you talking about. I took you in and taught you what you needed to know. What is your problem?”
Sasuke’s smirk only grew. “You’ve got a thing for the other me.”
It was a simple statement, said with a flat voice and a level tone, but that one statement brought a lot of shit crashing down on the blonds head.
He thought back to the way he had viewed the other Sasuke. Cute, adorable, funny, and mix that in with the urge to protect him and keep him here, even though it was evident he had come from a loony bin… and then it made sense. And to top it all off, it had been the bastard himself who had figured it out before Naruto.
The blond looked up, determined not to loose to the other again.
“I don’t know what your talking about.” He stood, moving to the living room, Sasuke following close behind him, both of their tea’s completely forgotten on the kitchen table.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A.N. Phew. That all kinda came out in one giant blurb.
Anyway, that was for you two JDSakuraKLi and Sneakyfox for your excellent help.
And now what you’ve all been waiting for.
EPISODE TWO! ~ Part two of three ~ The copy ninja meets his match
Kakashi: *leaning against the wall to the copy room, whistling a toon and waiting for someone*
Orochimaru: *Walks in and places his sheet of paper on the photocopier*
Kakashi: *watching intently*
Orochimaru: *quickly presses a few buttons and his copies come out*
Kakashi: *wasn’t able to catch which buttons he’s supposed to push*
Orochimaru: *takes his copies and walks out*
Kakashi: *walks over to the machine and puts his paper on the copy bed* *hit’s a few buttons*
Machine: *goes dead*
Kakashi: So you’ll work for the Michael Jackson wannabe but you wont work for me!? *kicks the machine*
Machine: *no response*
Kakashi: *lifts the lid and moves the paper to lean down over the copy bed* *Hand accidentally presses the copy button*
Machine: *lid slams down on Kakashi and begins copying*
Kakashi: *face is smashed against the copy bed*
Machine: *spits out a bunch of copies of Kakashi’s squished face*
Kakashi: *pulls his head from the vial machine* you’ve won this round.
~Fin
Lol. Alright, so the copy nin is again thwarted by the photocopy machine. Will his third try be successful? TUNE IN AND FIND OUT!