Konoha Legal

A/N: Here's the chapter. Next one in a few days time... I hope! :D

FULL Summary: Naruto is the Konoha District Attorney responsible for prosecuting Itachi. Unwittingly, he is thrown into the middle of a dangerous conspiracy, where blackmail and deceit become the rule of the day. Can he even trust Sasuke, his long lost best friend that he was just recently reunited with? SasuNaruSasu AU

Rating: Pervy Jiraiya and his... accessories in this chapter.

Disclaimer: Read my lips. Do. Not. Own.

Naruto parked his car in front of Konoha Hilton, before a valet attendant requested his keys. When the attendant noticed Naruto’s below average priced car, his eyes narrowed in scorn before walking away.

“Asshole” Naruto muttered under his breath.

Weaving his way through the many luxury cars that lined the front of Konoha’s top hotel, he stole one last glance at his car before realizing that it did indeed seem a little out of place.

Shrugging, he whipped out his phone and to call Tsunade.

“Tsunade?”Naruto checked when the line connected.

“Yeah. Proceed as planned” With that, Naruto stuffed the phone into his coat, careful not to end the line.

Stepping into the foyer of the hotel, he allowed himself to momentarily admire the exquisite marble floor, the intricate mosaic roof, and the giant chandelier that hung high and illuminated the whole area. Making his way to the reception, he cleared his throat to get the receptionist’s attention.

The receptionist looked up from her computer screen, gave him a fake, cheery smile, briefly finishing her typing before looking up again.

“Welcome to Hilton Konoha. How may I help you?”

“I have a booking under the name of Uzumaki Naruto”

“One moment please” The receptionist’s eyes went back to the computer screen.

Waiting patiently, Naruto allowed his eyes to admire the artwork that hung behind the receptionist.

Noticing his attention, the receptionist commented distractedly “You like our paintings?”

Naruto nodded, his eyes still fixed on one particular portrait.

That particular abstract portrait seemed to remind him of someone. Pale skin, black haired. Must be an Uchiha…

The receptionist continued: ‘This is one of the paintings commissioned by one of our largest benefactors, Uchiha Itachi. I’m sure you’ve heard of him, with the murder trial in the news…”

Naruto’s interest perked at that piece of information. An Uchiha Itachi portrait hanging in the most luxurious hotel in Konoha? Then again, Uchiha Inc. was a large benefactor of Hilton Konoha, and a portrait in the lobby shouldn’t be that out of the ordinary.

Deciding to enquire further, Naruto proceeded: “Who was the painter?”

“A lad known by the name of Sai. I think he is jail… Murder or something like that”

Nodding once again, Naruto asked the receptionist whether he could take a closer look at the photo. He knew he shouldn’t waste time on such a trivial matter, but somehow, something seemed out of place, something seemed out of the ordinary in that painting.

The receptionist flashed him a raised eyebrow and shrugged, motioning Naruto to help himself.

Naruto walked closer to the portrait, and looked carefully at the painting. It was one of those blurred abstract paintings. Blushing deeply when he realized it actually depicted Itachi in the nude, Naruto admired the flawless, pale, skin that was Itachi’s.

He knew Itachi, and he knew that Itachi wouldn’t just let anyone paint him in the nude. Meaning, this Sai guy either knew Itachi very, very well, or this guy was just painting his imagination, painting what he thought was Uchiha Itachi nude. Taking one last look at the portrait, his eyes suddenly rested on a scar drawn on Itachi’s left inner thigh.

Naruto thought back to the report he read just earlier. Uchiha Itachi was indeed scarred at that particular area. Those reports were confidential, which could only mean one thing: - this Sai guy knew Itachi very, very, very well. Itachi was by nature a withdrawn and private person. For him to be willing to be drawn in the nude… this Sai guy must be something to Itachi.

“Room 168, on the 16th floor” The receptionists voice seemed to bring him back to reality.

Nodding and thanking the receptionist, he took the keys and proceeded to the elevator, mentally reminding himself to check this Sai guy out some time.

Naruto found himself in front of room 168. His body tensed slightly with anticipation, before inserting the key. He then cautiously pushed open the door. Feeling and making sure that the pistol was still safely stowed in his jacket, he took a step into the room.

Quickly scanning the room, he realized that room 168 was a large executive suite. A large, king sized bed sat in the middle of the room, while a sofa stood perpendicular to him on the opposite side of the room. Facing it was a large flat screened television, one that he would never ever think of affording with his measly salary. Beside the television and facing the glass wall opposite Naruto stood a lavish work table overlooking the balcony. On his left was another door, evidently to the bathroom.

The room seemed empty and vacant. His eyes darting suspiciously around the room, Naruto slowly walked into it, feeling the pistol in his pocket again. His eyes suddenly caught a grey duffel bag lying beside the television. Feeling his hand tighten around the pistol again, he slowly unzipped the bag to reveal…

Sex toys. Lots and lots of sex toys, in every shape, size and colour. Dildos, vibrators, restraints, you name it. Blushing slightly, Naruto was about to walk away when the bathroom door suddenly opened. Tensing, 

Naruto quickly turned around and whipped out the pistol and pointed it at the source of the disturbance.

A man with long, white hair stepped out and quickly held his hands up. “Whoa, soldier…Calm down”

“Who are you?” Naruto snapped.

“People call me the Great Sage. But you can call me Jiraiya” the man announced, bowing in an elaborate fashion. “By the way…You’re holding the gun the wrong way”

Scowling, Naruto cautiously moved towards the exit, not taking his eyes and the pistol off the man.

“Why are you here?”

“What do you mean why am I here? Oh…” A look of realization dawned upon Jiraiya’s face.

“So that’s how you like it? Okay…” Jiraiya held his hands higher up.

Naruto raised his eyebrows.

“Mr. Policeman, I’ve been a bad, bad boy. Please punish me, sir” Jiraiya let out in a playful voice.

“What..?! No, EWW! STOP!! ” Naruto blurted out, disgusted. “I’m leaving!”

“Don’t you want to discipline me for being a bad, bad, disobedient boy? Come on, I have plenty of toys for you to… use on me”

As soon as those words escaped Jiraiya’s mouth, Naruto dropped the pistol and covered his ears, accidently falling to his knees, blushing deeply despite of himself. “Who the FUCK are you and why are you hitting on me? GET AWAY FROM ME YOU PERVERT!”

“Ooh… playing hard to get… I like that” Jiaraiya licked his lips in anticipation, making Naruto shudder involuntarily.

Fearing for his life, Naruto scrambled to his feet, and made his way to the door, exiting and slamming it behind him. Running towards the elevator, he suddenly remembered he had Tsunade on the line, and immediately whipped out the phone.

“NARUTO!!” said person flinched when he pressed his ear to the phone, and stopped his hasty retreat to the elevator.

“Did you hear that, Tsunade? The man hit on me! He wanted me to punish him! PUNISH HIM!! EWW!! He is a fucking pervert. I’m calling him The Pervert from now on! The nerve of him…“

Naruto was interrupted with a screech that sounded only remotely like his name emanating from the phone.

“LISTEN TO ME, NARUTO!”

Naruto stopped his rampage and paused, patiently waiting for Tsunade to continue.

“That man, Jiraiya, I know him. I want you to go back into the room and hand me to him. NOW!”

“But The Pervert hit on me. He wanted to…”

“NOW!!”

Sighing in defeat, he walked back to room 168 and opened the door again.

The Pervert greeted him with a smug smile, lying down suggestively on the bed. He made a motion to Naruto’s pistol that lay on the ground. “You forgot your gun”

Scowling, Naruto thrust the phone to The Pervert, before walking across the room, trying to put as much distance as possible between them.

Raising his eyebrows, Jiraiya looked at the phone and saw an active call to Tsunade. Immediately, he pressed the phone to his ears. “Tsunade?”

Naruto heard nothing but hmms, yes and okays for the next fifteen minutes before The Pervert approached him and passed the phone to him.

Throwing The Pervert a dirty look, Naruto wiped the phone on his sleeve before pressing it to his ear. God knows where that face has been.

“Tsunade?”

“Naruto, I want you to take Jiraiya to my chambers”

“WHAT?! NO!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT HE JUST DID! HE…”

Naruto was interrupted with what he recognized as Tsunade’s fist banging on the table.

“Bring. Jiraiya. To. My. Chambers. Now” Tsunade demanded in a voice that that allowed no dissent.

Gulping, Naruto sighed and nodded. “Okay… but if he tries anything funny I’ll castrate him”

“That will make the two of us” Tsunade sighed amusingly.

Ending the call, Naruto looked up to The Pervert and motioned him to follow.

“You heard what I said. Try anything funny and I’ll castrate you”

“Ooh… Pain in pleasure… Me likey” Jiraiya licked his lips.

Shoulders drooping in defeat, he practically ran to the elevator hoping that he would lose The Pervert.

What say you?

Review please!

PS: Who else is anxious to see what Jiraiya's message/Pein's secret is?