100 Themes fics

Title: Tears

Pairing: GenIru, GenRai

Rating: G

Warnings: Yaoi M/M relationship, WAFF, Angst, No sexual content, One shot, COMPLETE

Summary: Genma tells his best friend he's 'in love.'

Disclaimer: Borrowed from Kishi for evilness.



Genma hated the way the little drops of moisture formed in the other's eyes before slipping quietly down the tanned cheeks. It tore at him to watch the smile form, knowing it wasn't real but it was for him. But, the worst, was when Iruka hugged him and told him how happy he was for him. That... that killed a not-so-small part of his heart.



"You two are perfect for each other..." The words lacked enthusiasm but held a surprising amount of conviction.



When Iruka hugged him, his resolve faltered. How could 'happiness' hurt so much? It didn't make sense and for a moment the desire to tell the chunin it was a mistake was overwhelming. But, for a reason he couldn't name, the words simply wouldn't come.



"Thanks," he said instead.  It wasn't as though Iruka would ever be his, and as much as he loathed it, he knew it was a fact. Genma had kept hoping that the other would begin to feel something more for him, anything. But, it had never happened. Iruka loved him, just not the way Genma wanted the man to love him. 



The tears... didn't mean what he wanted them to. He wished Iruka was upset because Genma was moving on. Despite how much of a lie that was. It was simply that he had given up on the chunin ever returning his feelings, and was settling for the only other person he knew he could love, someday. Someone who already loved him.



Because, it was easier than fighting for something he could never have. He just couldn't hold onto false hopes anymore. Too many tears had left him achingly hollow and right now Genma knew he needed something solid and real to fill that.



No, the tears in Iruka's eyes were because knew he couldn't come running to him whenever he was upset anymore. That, made Genma feel worse, because he wanted to be there for his friend. Even though,  he knew it was slowly killing him.



But, Raidou... Raidou loved him. His best friend loved him as much as Genma loved Iruka. And because he couldn't stand causing Rai to feel the way he felt, he'd given up on what he wanted. It wasn't as hard as he'd thought, because he already knew he could never have it. But, it hurt, and, he knew it always would. Just maybe though, if he didn't have to see Iruka's tears he could pretend it didn't.



So, he hugged his friend, smiled and then walked away.