Fading Scars

This is an Alternate Universe fic set perhaps a day or two after Orochimaru’s retreat from Konoha. A lot of liberties were taken from that point on in terms of time-line. This is also a very angsty (especially Naruto) and sexually graphic fic—just the way we like it!

This was written as a one-on-one RP, so the point of view of the story will change, usually with every paragraph. Scenes will also change abruptly and large periods of time will pass with little notice, though I’ll try to give some warning at the beginning of the chapter.

// = thoughts
* = emphasis

Please read and enjoy!

Fading Scars
Chapter Eight:

Neji eyed the meat with distaste, but he knew it would probably be the last fresh food they might have for a while. He sighed but nodded, accepting a small leg piece to nibble at.

Though they were both hungry, Naruto and Kiba each gave up some of their rabbits to share with Hinata, just to be sure they all got some. The warm meat helped improve Naruto's mood immensely, and he wished suddenly that they could have spent more time camping like this, back when they had been training with Kakashi.

The meal, though welcomed, took on something of a solemn air as everyone began to finish. Eventually they were going to have to decide what to do, and in the meantime…Shikamaru was all too aware that the responsibility of that decision fell to him. Once it seemed that everyone was finishing, he cleared his throat loudly to get their attention. "It doesn't seem like we're going anywhere today," he said. "And I, for one, am sick of running at night. We can take the day to rest up and get some shit together." He fixed Sasuke and Neji with a sharp eye. "And if you even think about running off, we're not going easy next time. You two have been enough of a pain."

Neji lifted a slightly trembling hand, rubbing at his forehead. "I'm not going anywhere," he assured, feeling the truth of his words in the ache that still rang at the back of his skull. "I think I need to rest anyway." He touched Sasuke's arm before shifting away, dropping onto his side.

Shikamaru shrugged out of his chuunin coat, tossing it around the fire to Sasuke. "Give him that to sleep on," he offered. "While you go through with me and disarm the rest of the traps."

Sasuke frowned, though he was impressed that Shikamaru recognized there still were some. He folded the jacket and moved to slip it under Neji's head. "Yeah, okay. There are only a few left."

Naruto watched them a moment, frowning. //I want something to do.// He jumped to his feet and began gathering their canteens. "I'll get us some more water," he decided, bouncing off towards the river.

Kiba stood as well, patting Hinata briefly on the shoulder. "I'm getting some more wood. Akamaru--stay here, allright?" The dog barked once, moving closer to Hinata. He smiled at them both before heading out on his own mission.

Neji glanced up only briefly to see that he was alone with Hinata; he closed his eyes again.

Hinata gulped. She suddenly wished she could have found an excuse of her own, if only to keep her from this particular situation. Slowly she edged around the fire near Neji, hugging Akamaru to her chest. "Um…Neji-kun...?" She licked her lips. "I...really am sorry. I didn't mean to...to hurt you so badly."

He snorted quietly. "Did they only teach you that one seal, Hinata-sama?" he asked, unable to keep all the bitterness out of his voice. "I wouldn't be surprised, if they did."

"I...." Hinata hugged Akamaru more tightly. "I'm sorry," she said again. "I'd take it off for you, if...I could...." She felt her eyes begin to sting and tried to push back the emotion. "I won't do it anymore."

Neji was quiet a long moment, listening to her sniffling. "It's all right," he murmured. He lay still, opening his eyes so he could stare into the fire. "Hinata-sama. Would you have killed me?" he asked, tone low.

Hinata bit her lip. "They told me to," she said quietly. "But I don't think I would have been able to." She shivered. "I don't want you to die."

//I don't want to die, either.// He nodded, curling a little tighter. "You were always kind," he whispered. "It's good that you didn't move on in the exam, Hinata-sama. You...." Neji trailed off, not sure how to continue.

Hinata smiled faintly. "I know." A little encouraged that Neji didn't seem too angry with her, she moved a little closer and let Akamaru down. The dog approached Neji hesitantly to sniff him. "Is there...anything I can do?"

Neji glanced up at her. "Did that brat leave any water before he ran off?" he asked. "I'm a little thirsty...."

"I still have mine," Hinata offered, grateful that she could help. She tugged her small canteen free. "It's got some left, but it might be warm."

"That's fine." Neji pushed himself up onto his elbow, managing to stay upright long enough to get a few gulps down. He settled back quickly, taking a several steadying breaths. Once he felt that he wouldn't be sick again, Neji spoke up once more. "I'm not going back," he murmured softly--he had to be sure she understood.

Hinata's shoulders slumped. "I know." She licked her lips. //I should tell him.// "Neji-kun...please don't go to that man." She shifted anxiously. "I overheard my father--he said that if you make it out of the country, the seal won't be able to work as well. It won't even slow you down. So please...just not him."

Neji was already shaking his head. "You don't understand," he replied. "I want to get rid of this mark--I need to." He brushed the seal in question, eyes narrowing as it tingled. "How can I be free...if I still carry this?"

"But he won't be able to help you anyway," she pleaded. "Not even Hokage could. And Sasuke-kun--"

She broke off abruptly, hunching her shoulders again. //No, he has to understand.// "Please," she said again. "Don't go. He'll just use you to get Byakugan. And if Sasuke-kun goes...he'll die."

Neji looked up sharply at that, trying to judge the truth in her words. "How do you know?" he asked, keeping his voice down so Sasuke wouldn't be able to hear him.

"I was there when Hokage-sama explained it to my father," Hinata answered meekly. "The curse seal he has...if he uses it, it'll poison him with Orochimaru's spirit. And then there won't be any Sasuke-kun left...." She lowered her head. "I didn't really understand it. But that's what I d." d."

Neji shuddered, pulling his coat a little tighter. "We will have to tell him," he said quietly. "But I don't know if he'll listen. He--neither of us--trust the Hokage anymore." //But if Sasuke really is in danger of losing his soul....//

"He...might listen to you," Hinata suggested. "And, if it helps, this is what Hokage told my father.ess ess they are all lying even to each other...." She shivered a little at the thought.

"It is possible," he replied, shaking his head. "But I will talk to him. Later." Neji closed his eyes, trying to alleviate the ache in skull so he could think better. "Either way, though, neither of us want to go back. Things...are very wrong there."

Hinata nodded vaguely. "Okay." She took her canteen back, and patted Akamaru on the head, hoping...he might stay with Neji a while. "If you need anything, I'll get it for you," she said as she edge away to allow him space.

"Thank you." //Hinata-sama.... If only you could understand. Someone like you shouldn't be there any more than me.// But he fell silent again, adjusting Shikamaru's jacket beneath his head so he could try and get some rest. For a moment...he wished Sasuke would return. It felt strange, lying there without him.

Sasuke and Shikamaru returned not long afterwards, Naruto and Kiba soon after that. But they were awkward as a group, and already Sasuke was trying to think of excuses to slip away for a while. Not that he figured he could get far--Shikamaru didn't seem to be paying attention, but he could tell the ninja's senses were keen. Not to mention Naruto.

Sasukghedghed, leaning lightly against Neji's back as the older boy continued to rest. //I guess we're just stuck here for now.//

Neji managed to doze for a time, comforted by Sasuke's presence. When he woke again, it was to an air of tension. He sighed. //I need to talk to Sasuke, but....// He lifted his head, glancing over his shoulder. "We need to talk," he said quietly, brushing a hand against his back.

//They're not going to give us privacy,// Sasuke thought with a frown. He glanced down at him. "Something wrong?"

//I might as well say it--they all know this already anyway.// "Your curse seal. Apparently it will allow Orochimaru to eventually take over your mind." His eyes narrowed. "I don't know if it's true," he went on quickly, "but such a thing is possible."

Sasuke went still, his eyes narrowing. //Him, too?// He glanced around their small camp--Hinata was trying to look interested in helping Kiba sharpen his kunai, Shikamaru and Naruto playing some kind of drawing game in the dirt, but...their eyes kept flicking to him. Especially Hinata. "Hinata told you that?" he asked quietly.

"She overheard the Hokage telling Hyuuga," he admitted. Neji rolled onto his back to better see his companion. "Sasuke. It is possible, especially if your curse is like mine. He could transfer enough chakra to do it." His eyes narrowed. "But if you still want to go, I'm still coming with you."

Naruto raised his head, about to protest, but the look being passed between the two made him fall silent again.

Sasuke just watched him a moment, considering those words. //He'd be willing to come with me, even if it meant both of us just dying....// He looked vaguely away. "If I gave into him," he murmured. "If they're righd thd the curse gives everything I have to Orochimaru…do you think he'd use it to kill my brother?"

//It really means that much to you.// "No," he replied, just as quietly. "Not unless your brother got in his way."

"Oh." Sasuke slumped a little. "No, you're right. He wouldn't." Even he knew that much. But there was still that chance....

A tremor went down Sasuke's arms, and he clenched his fists against that sudden anger. //But this is…my only chance. Even Kakashi said that I've just about reached my limit for how young I still am. But I can't wait any longer!// His teeth ground in frustration. //I'm the only one that can....//

Neji watched him a moment, feeling a strange ache in his chest at Sasuke's obvious pain. Mindful that there were others watching, he could do no more than set a firm hand against his companion's arm. //I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sasuke.//

Naruto looked away, shaking. //There has to be something--isn't there something I can do? I can fight--I can help him, but....// He pressed a hand against his stomach. //What will happen to me, if I do?//

Sasuke pushed abruptly to his feet--he couldn't think straight, with everyone staring at him, pitying him.... "I'm not running away," he shot in Shikamaru's direction. "I want time to think."

Shikamaru frowned. "Don't take too long," he warned boredly.

Naruto watched him walk off, still debating. Finally, he stood up before Sasuke could disappear. "Wait!" His fingers curled tightly. "Sasuke, I...." He trailed off, suddenly unsure again.

Sasuke paused, turning to glance at Naruto over his shoulder. As if he would understand. "Yeah?" he called back. "What?"

//What...am I doing? Sasuke....// "Think about it, okay? I know...." His fists clenched. "I know what this is like for you, believe it or not. I just...want you to know that."

"You...." Sasuke turned to face him properly, his expression darkened. "You know," he repeated. "What the hell makes you think you know what this is like for me?"

Naruto straightened beneath his glare. "I know what kind of choice you have to make now," he replied, feeling everyone's gaze heavily upon him. "I know...what it's like to fight against something you can't beat." His eyes narrowed. "You're not the only one who's special, you know."

Sasuke felt another tremor run through him, one that nearly wrenched his barely maintained composure from him. "I'm not special," he replied in a low tone. "I'm just the only one that survived."

He shook his head. "Everything's about you," he growled. "It's always been about you. Best in the class, number one rookie, special favors and attention from all the teachers. And now this." Naruto unconsciously set a hand against his stomach, fingers curling tightly in his shirt.

"It's not like I asked for this!" Sasuke shot back, beginning to tremble. //The only reason that's true is because I'm the only one left!// "It's only because they want to use me--everyone wants to use me!" He jerked down the collar of his shirt to reveal his curse seal. "I know what this is! *You're* the ones that don't understand!"

"Nobody ever asks for it!" Naruto bellowed over him, stepping away from the fire. "Nobody wants to be used! *I didn't want to be used!*" Naruto jerked his own shirt up. The marks that covered his entire stomach seemed twist with his heavy breathing. "Don't you talk to me about what's fair! Don't you tell me that I don't understand!"

Sasuke froze, staring at the marks covering Naruto's stomach. Behind him, the others had gone silent, staring. He gulped. //That's…a curse seal? But how…?// "What...." Sasuke suddenly couldn't find his voice. "What is that?"

Naruto snarled, though he felt angry tears already burning in his eyes. "That's what I have to carry," he hissed. "That's the destiny I was born with. That's the monster living in me, what makes me just as special as you. That's what'll eat me if I can't be strong enough." Naruto pulled his shirt back into place, dropping his eyes. "Don't you fucking tell me...I don't understand."

Neji pushed himself up on his elbows, feeling the skin on his forehead tingle and burn. "Naruto...."

Sasuke's hands trembled at his sides as he continued to stare at his former teammate. It…was too much. There wasn't anything he could say, and after everything, all that he already had tearing at his mind....

"Sh…shut up!" Sasuke all but screamed. //I can't do this.// "Who the hell cares about you, anyway!" He twisted around, fleeing up into the trees. //Damnit…!//

"Naruto-kun...." Hinata gulped, pushing shakily to her feet. She approached slowly. //I don't understand, but…Naruto-kun is….//

Naruto glanced up to watch him go. He felt suddenly hollow after saying so much, his anger draining into shame. //I...shouldn't have said all that.//

Neji glanced between the two boys, feeling dizzy. //Sasuke....// He rolled onto his knees, but there his body stopped. His fingers curled against the grass, angry at his weakness. //Damnit, Sasuke--//

Hinata licked her lips, finally reaching Naruto's side. She reached out, hesitated, and at last touched his shoulder. "Naruto-kun...?" She watched him with concern. "Are...are you...okay?"

Taking a deep breath, Naruto finally lifted his head. "Yeah." He brushed dust off his shirt, reaching up to pat Hinata's hand. "I'll be fine." Naruto stepped back. "I think...I'll go get us some water, okay? I won't be long." Picking up his canteen, he started towards the river.

Hinata reached after him, but by then he was too far. Slowly she dropped her hand. "Naruto-kun...."

Shikamaru watched him go, then glanced at the direction Sasuke had gone, then back towards Naruto. He sighed. //What a mess.// He wasn't quite brave enough to face Sasuke at the moment, but Naruto...maybe. He pushed to his feet. "Kiba, keep an eye out, okay?" He gave Neji a look as he started after Naruto. "All of you stay here."

Neji looked at him, then sighed. //Damnit.// He nodded and lowered himself back into the grass.

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