Blue Christmas

Chapter 8 “I Don’t Know What I Want.”

His knees were weak, his heart was pounding and all he could think was ‘this must be heaven.’ His body molded against the taller boy and his hand buried into the silky raven tresses. This was truly his first real kiss and it felt so perfect. Unfortunately the need for oxygen became an issue and he slowly ended the kiss. As the kiss ended reality set in and as much as he wished to be swept away by the gorgeous Uchiha he knew he couldn’t.

“Sasuke…” those sorrowful blue eyes hid underneath the shaggy golden bangs. “Don’t…”

“Naruto don’t push me away. I can feel you trying but I won’t let you.”

“Teme, as nice as that kiss was and no matter how your bastard ways are starting to grow on me, I can’t be with you.” The blond gently pushed the taller boy away.

“You can, you just don’t want to be with me.” Sasuke glared refusing to move an inch.

“I… I don’t know what I want but I can’t be with anyone. I am a parent and I am struggling to keep my brother with me against a woman who is determined to take him from an unstable home. I can’t afford another custody battle so I need play by there rules. I’m sorry Sasuke.” Naruto cried as he turned away trying to leave the Uchiha but the raven didn’t let him go.

“Naruto… You won’t lose Kyuubi. You are a great parent to that little boy. No one who has seen what I have in the last two days can deny that. Hell the whole schools know you would do anything for him just by singing to him front of everybody. That bitch won’t take him from you I promise.” Sasuke pulled the smaller boy into his arms and held tight. He could feel the tears soak his shirt and hands grip his clothes with desperation.

“I can’t lose him. Kyu is the last part of my parents I have. She already tried once and she threaten to do it again.”

“Everything is going to be alright. You have me and our friends to support you not to mention your family at Rasengan. If she does try we can have him transferred to Konoha Academy Primary School Division.”

“But it cost a lot to attend Konoha and he’s too young to get a scholarship.”

“But not too young for a Sharingan scholarship. My Uncle has a program in his company that sponsors underprivileged kids each year who has the most potential to succeed and gives them the chance at the school of their choice.”

“If I move Kyu it would be like running and I’m not about to turn tail like a coward. I’m no coward and I don’t want my brother to see me as one.” Naruto snapped as he pushed the Uchiha away.

“It’s not running it’s providing your brother with a better life. He’ll be with Tobi and Obito who are now his best friends. Moving him to Konoha would be showing everyone that you are giving him the best education possible.”

“My brother is right Naruto-kun.” Both teens jump as Itachi seemed to come out of no where. “The school official is looking for funding for her school. Fire Country distributes funding not only by grade averages but how affective their staff is performing. It shows the state that the teachers are wiling to put their students first and they are deserving of extra funding. Having a child taken away from an improper home would be a huge feather in the schools cap when it comes to review time. It would show that they are willing to go beyond the call of duty for the children.”

“So she’s going to keep trying to take Kyuubi away no matter what I do.” Naruto stated as he looked helplessly at the nursery door.

“Not if you do as Sasuke suggests and have him transfer to Konoha. Being a private institution they don’t need to seek funding from the state.”

“I’ll think about it. Thanks Itachi-san. I better head back to the party Emerald and Sasori are probably wondering what happened to me.” The blond teen bowed briefing before disappearing down the hall.

“Itachi what the hell are you doing here?” Sasuke growled. He was furious not only did Itachi take his time with the Dobe he let Naruto get away.

“You both were taking so long to put the children to bed mother was getting worried she wanted me to make sure everything was alright. It looks as though Naruto-kun is under a lot of stress.”

“That is an understatement if I ever heard one. He is worried about losing his brother that he won’t at least try and be with me. How is it that you were able to calm his fears saying the same thing I did, when he just fought me at every word?”

“You just want to get in to his pants otouto, while I on the other hand am a voice of reason with no ulterior motive.” the older Uchiha smirked as he turned and headed back to the ballroom.

“I want more than just a quick fuck Itachi. Naruto means more to me than that.” Sasuke growled as he caught up to his brother just before the ballroom doors.

“Then you better start showing it. If you don’t he’ll be gone before you know it.”

XxXxXxXx

“Iruka-sensei are you here all by your lonesome?”

“No Genma-sensei I’m here with Naruto and his brother.”

“Yeah I saw the munchkin cute little thing I didn’t even know Uzumaki had a brother. But as nice as the Uzumaki kids are you need to get out there and find a dance partner. Kakashi-sensei seems to have taken an interest in you. He’s been watching you all night.” The shaggy blond winked at the scar English teacher.

“Not you too? Did Naruto tell you to try and get me together with Kakashi-sensei?”

“Go Naruto! He is one sharp cookie and I think he’s right. You both could balance each other, just like me and Raido. He’s my common sense and I’m his fun side other wise I’d be wild and drunk off my ass by now and he’d be as fun as a sick in the mud.”

“I seriously doubt that. Raido-sensei is a good friend and I’ve never seen him as dull.” Iruka wasn’t one to gossip but he didn’t like putting anyone down. Raido was Genma longtime lover, probably since their high school years, and he taught algebra in the Math department. He was badly scarred on the left side of his face but despite the deformity he was well like and popular with the students. Iruka didn’t see why Genma was saying he was dull and boring.

“Thank you Iruka-sensei, but I have to agree with my less than tactful boyfriend.” Raido smiled as he walked up to the two teachers. “As much as I hate to admit it I was a very serious minded person before I was jumped by Genma in our senior year.”

“I did not jump you! I just gave you a friendly glomp. You looked so stressed I had to do something before you cracked.” Genma exclaimed as he squeeze his lover.

“And you were such an air-head that if it weren’t for me making half of our dates study dates you wouldn’t have passed high school or college.” Raido replied.

“See Iruka-sensei it’s like I said we balance each other. You need someone that balance and I think Uzumaki is trying to help you find it. Loosen up and go dance with the man.”

“I don’t need to loosen up and I am balanced. Kakashi-sensei and I are too different and mix together as well as oil and water. Why won’t you all just leave me alone!” Iruka snapped but before his stunned colleagues could respond he stormed out of the ballroom.

“I think I pushed him too far.”

“You think Gen? Not everyone can admit their lonely babe. He’s scared and doesn’t like change.”

“Well that is just going to have to change. It’s Christmas and no one should be alone at Christmas.” Genma declared as he started scanning the crowd.

“How are you going to that and what are you doing now?”

“I’m looking for Uzumaki-san. He’s trying to get Iruka and Kakashi together. Were going to find him and demand he let us help.”

The Scarred Math teacher sighed. “Something tells me we’ll be getting coal for Christmas.”

XxXxXxXx

‘Why can’t everyone just leave me alone?’ Iruka walked quickly through the halls not really paying attention to where he was going until he bumped into a smaller petite figure.

“Oh Gomen I’m sorry I wasn’t paying attention.”

“It’s alright Iruka-sensei I’m not use to my surroundings here.” the blind pianist giggled.

“Yes this place is rather huge and intimidating. Still I should have been more careful I nearly ran you over.” The flustered teacher apologized once again.

“Don’t worry about it, but where were you going in such a hurry is the ballroom on fire?”

“No! I mean no I was just getting some fresh air and away from bothersome colleagues.”

“I take it this has to do with Kakashi-sensei.” Sukora smiled understanding at the stunned teacher.

“How?”

“Blue Eyes is a bit of a gossip and in a small place like Rasengan everyone knows by dinner time.”

“Oh how embarrassing.” Iruka groaned hiding his face in his hands.

“Don’t be sensei it just shows how much he cares and that you are part of the family.” Sukora gently slipped her arm through his and began to lead him back to the ballroom. “Now, I understand that you like Kakashi-sensei but he lacks tact and manners.”

“Well, I…”

“Don’t worry sensei your secret is safe with me. Anyways as I was saying Blue Eyes is a gossip and he also talks about Kakashi-sensei. I know how much he loves you and he is hurt every time you turn him down.”

“Well, he…”

“I know Sensei, he is very blunt and debased when it comes to expressing it. Well he hasn’t had the emotional or morel guidance we had growing up. From what Blue Eyes has told me he’s been alone for a very long time and is more like and infant in the ways of proper dating.”

“That is an understatement. It’s so embarrassing sometimes.” Iruka’s blush came back in full force. “But even if he somehow tamed it down I don’t think I’ll date him. We’re too different and just wouldn’t work.”

“I think you both are not so different Sensei.” Sukora giggled a little when she felt the teacher go rigid with the accusation. “I don’t mean you have the same personality Sensei but the pasts. But instead of trying to move beyond it you seem to be content in being alone. I won’t ask why, because that reason is your own, and I can understand that. My Father is the same way. Since my mom died he’s content to raise me and not look for a girlfriend to make him happy. As much as I love my father it makes me sad to think he’s giving up his chance of happiness for me. I believe Blue Eyes feels the same way. You are important to him and he wants you to be happy.”

“Naruto is just as important to me like a younger brother, but I’m fine.”

“But are you happy?” Sukora asked quietly as they entered the Ballroom. Shino was at her side in an instant and she shyly slipped her hand in his. “Thank you for helping me find my way back Iruka-sensei.”

“You’re welcome Sukora-san.” The English watched the girl be whisked away by her date as he thought about what she said. He was content in his quiet life and he had been since his parents died. It was a lonely life but he didn’t want to risk getting into a relationship only to be left alone in the end. Was he happy? Content yes, but no he was not happy. The years of loneliness seemed to have crept up on him and left him jaded and bitter. He wanted out of this cycle he had gotten himself into, he wanted to be with someone who would make him happy and chase away the loneliness. Could that Person be the perverted art teacher? Iruka’s sensible side was shouting and stomping its foot saying ‘Absolutely Not!’ While his emotional side screamed ‘Take a Chance!’ he was torn.

“I need a drink.” Shaking away his warring thoughts he headed straight for the bar. If he couldn’t make sense of his heart and thoughts then he would drown them out until he could.

XxXxXxXx

The next morning Iruka woke up with on doozy of a hang over. He had spent the rest of the ball at the bar trying to drown his confusing thoughts. Kakashi was shocked to find the teacher so wasted he could barely remember his name. The Masked sensei dragged the poor English teacher back to his room to sleep it off. But once he managed to get Iruka to bed the scarred man pulled Kakashi into bed with him and refused to let go. Only at the first rays of sunlight did Iruka let go of his hostage. Even though the thought of leaving broke Kakashi’s heart he knew it was best if he left. Chances were that Iruka wouldn’t remember anything.

“Why is Iruka-sensei holding his head?” Kyuubi asked loudly at breakfast causing said teacher to wince.

“Kyu-chan you do not shout at the table. Iruka-sensei has a bad headache so it’s best if we speak softly.” Kakashi said gently as he took a seat by the miserable teacher. “Are you feeling better Iruka-sensei?”

“The room is no longer spinning but that’s about it.” grumbled the smaller man as he sipped his coffee.

“I think I had better drive us to Rasengan.” The art teacher smiled beneath his mask.

Soon Naruto entered the room with Madara Uchiha. It seemed they were in a deep conversation. Sasuke was hopeful that his uncle would convince Naruto to have Kyuubi moved to Konoha. His Dobe was in deep thought over it but it seemed his pride might be a factor in keeping the boy at Shuriken.

“Thank you Uchiha-sama I have much to think about but you and the twins are welcomed at Rasengan anytime. I know Kyuubi would happy to see you all again.”

“You are a good man Uzumaki-san. I know Tobi and Obit will want tot visit Kyuubi-kun real soon. You have done wonders with them and I hope you keep an open mind about that scholarship. Kyuubi-kun is a bright child and has a real future ahead of him following in his brother’s foot steps.”

“Arigato Uchiha-sama.” Naruto bowed deeply hiding the blush on his face before hurrying to his place next to Sasuke at the breakfast table.

“Last Night was a wonderful evening.” Mikoto smiled as she glided into the room. “You are very talented Naruto-kun. Wherever did you learn to dance so elegantly I swear I have been trying to find a good place that teaches ballroom dancing. I was in competitions when I was young but I fell out of practice after I had Itachi. I tried to get him and Sasuke into it but they found the instructors mundane and refused to learn anything but the basic waltz.”

“I started learning when I was 12. Kurenai Sarutobi is one of the tenets at my building open a dance studio and asked my mom if I would be interested lessons. My mom signed me up saying I needed exercise and get my head out of the books. I’ve been dancing ever since. I mostly dance on the weekends helping with the other students but Emerald and I did win a junior competition once. We entered mostly to promote the dance studio but we had a lot of fun blowing the competition away.” Naruto smiled as he poured the syrup on his pancakes.

“You must give the name of the Studio I would like to start taking lessons again.”

“Oh it’s called Genjutsu Studios.”

“You know what? Maybe I can get Itachi and Sasuke to try again.” Mikoto’s eye lit up as she looked to her children.

“I would to mother, but my schedule won’t allow it.” Itachi said as he cracked opened his soft boiled egg. “But Sasuke’s schedule is free. I’m sure with Naruto-kun as his teacher he will excel most rapidly.”

“What a wonderful idea I’ll call first thing after the holidays!” Sasuke paled before glaring at his smirking older brother. “Naruto-kun I would like to thank you for singing last night it was the highlight of the party. Everyone was talking about it after you left.”

“Uh… yeah that was kind of unplanned.” The whiskered teen laughed as he scratched the back of his head. “Kyuubi can be stubborn about his nightly song.”

“No moon song, no sleep.” Kyuubi said stubbornly.

“Yeah I got that buddy.”

“Well I hope we will be seeing more of you both from now on. Madara decided to move back to the manor to stay closer to family. You and Kyuubi are here welcome anytime.”

“Arigato Mikoto-san and for all your hospitality you have shown us.”

“Our thanks as well, but I’m afraid we have to get going.” Kakashi smiled through his mask as he helped Iruka to feet. “Naruto is the main cook for Christmas Eve Dinner tonight.”

“You cook too? Naruto-kun you are man of many talents.” Itachi smirked looking pointedly at Sasuke who was itching to kick his brother but was too far away.

“Well it was trail and error for awhile but Izumo took pity on me and took me under his culinary wing.” The blond smiled as he finished his breakfast.

“Do we have to go?” the whiskered chibi groaned. Tobi and Obito didn’t look to happy with their friend leaving either.

“I’m afraid so Kyu-chan but we’ll come back again. Finish up eating and I’ll finish packing up.”

“Hai Aniki.” The chibi sighed sorrowful.

XxXxXxXx

Iruka stumbled to car his head still pounding. He swore he would never drink again but then again that’s what everyone says when they suffer a tremendous hangover. He felt that he missed something that last night but his head hurt too much to think about it. He also didn’t like the idea that Kakashi was driving his car, but he wasn’t well enough to drive.

“Take it easy sensei you don’t want to make your headache worse do you?”

“Shut up and drive Kakashi.” the English teacher snarled.

“Sensei is grouchie.” whispered little Kyuubi.

“I know so we’ll let him rest on the ride home.” Naruto whispered back as he buckled the car seat.

“So Dobe you gonna call?” Sasuke asked as he watched the blond closed the car door.

“Call who?”

“Who do you think?”

“Look Sasuke things are little crazy right now. I just can’t think about anything relationship wise and I probably won’t until Kyu is grown and on his own. So let’s just leave us at friends.”

“I said it once and I’ll say it again don’t push me away I won’t let you. You deserve a life too. Just because you are a single parent doesn’t mean you can’t have a relationship.”

“Yes it does. When someone is trying to take my brother I wil do everything I possibly can to stop them. Getting in a relationship with another boy is just more fuel on the fire that will burn me to the stake.” Naruto’s eyes began to tear up. He was drawn to Sasuke and he wanted to be free to explore these growing feelings he had for the raven haired boy but he just couldn’t risk losing Kyuubi. Utatane had high moral standards and a gay guardian was not the ideal home for a child.

“Naruto, I won’t give up on us. If that bitch tries to take Kyuubi than we’ll fight her! I won’t let you be alone in this. Take Madara’s offer move him to Konoha!” Sasuke was pissed that Naruto wanted to run from him rather than try and stay together.

“I just don’t know okay! I want to be with you but I can’t right now. I have to do what’s best Kyuubi. I’m sorry.” The Raven watched as his Dobe slip away from him. He wanted to go after him but he was held back by his brother.

“Give him some time, otouto. He’s hurting and torn right now give him chance to collect his thoughts.” The Uchiha’s watched the little compact drive out of sight. “This is the time of year his pain is at an all time high. You heard at breakfast how his mother signed him up for dancing lessons him. Rumor around the Hyuuga’s firm is that his father had an awesome tenor voice during Karaoke night at the office gatherings. I’m willing to bet that the moon song was sung every night to Naruto and Kyuubi before he died.”

“How do you know all this stuff?”

“When you became smitten with Naruto-kun, naturally I had to find out about this person. The first thing that came up was the newspaper clipping about the accident. The Sannins managed to keep the worst of the trials out of the press but there were still updates on 14 year-old orphan turned father. After that his name would pop up in the oddest places which eventually led me to Otogakure and watching his performance. I knew eventually you would find him as well but you were stubborn and it took you longer than I excepted.” Itachi sighed as they walked the snowy grounds.

“You’re saying that you wanted me to date him just because he got me to react?”

“No I wanted you to be his friend. The kiss was accidental and could easily be laughed of over time. I never thought you would want something more until the night of the Christmas production. I was there when you cornered the slippery fox and before he made his great escape you were glaring daggers at the girl who was assumed to be his girlfriend. If looks could kill that girl would be dead.”

“So what now Aniki?” Sasuke ran a frustrated hand through his hair. He was lost and in doubt of himself and what to do but the only thing that he do was listen to the wise words of his older just as he had done as a child.

“You wait and you can be there for him when he needs you to be. But if you want to be in his thoughts just to get your foot through the door buy him a nice Christmas present.” Itachi smirked before disappearing into the house.

“Great. What kind of present do you get a Dobe?”

A/N: Greetings from the Arizona Desert! In an attempt to find a cure for my writes block I have traveled across the ocean to a barren wasteland. While I have found some muses to inspire me they have yet to influence the rig I ht stories. So here is what I have to offer. While it is not as long as I would have liked to post it is from the heart of my muse. I have not given up on My Chibi Dobe! I am however stuck in the middle of the chapter. So have patience as I continue to work at it and hunt down muses. Thanks for reading Keep reviewing.