In the cold of space you find the heat of suns

Thank you for the reviews. They inspire me to continue this story.

There has been an extra update this week. You may wish to check that you have read the last chapter.

Apologies if the characters have grown differently in their new environment.

Spacer crews travel the Far Borders and the Fringe of occupied space, trading. Spacing is an ancient and honourable profession carved out by millenniums. Most spacers start out as fourteen-year-old boys seeking a future. Few survive a decade spacing.

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83. Survival

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All thoughts of Gaara and Kimimaro vanished when Kiba rechecked the kit with the tail. He had stopped gaining mass and he was moving less than the others. Kiba was beginning to think that he had been wrong; perhaps a foetus with a tail could not be promising.

When Naruto came through from the babies’ nursery Kiba could see that he had waited too long; Naruto already knew that the kit was in trouble.

“He is not doing well,” Naruto admitted. “What can we do?”

“We could begin experimenting,” Kiba suggested. “We could change the feeds slightly, based on what one would anticipate would be required by an individual who was more fox, less human.” He hesitated but pushed on. “How far so you want to go to save him if he starts to slide away?”

Naruto’s skin had changed colour. His whiskers had drooped. Kiba prepared to catch him should he faint. “You think it will come to that?” he whispered.

“I do not know,” Kiba admitted. “I know we should discuss it now and not when seconds will make a difference between whether an intervention will succeed or fail. We will find Sasuke-sama and talk.”


They talked with Iruka and Kakashi as well as Sasuke. The five of them settled around the table in the galley.

“If the kit fades away,” Kiba explained, “it probably means that there is something fundamentally wrong, some clash between his fox side and his human side. If we save him, that clash will probably continue to cause him problems. We will probably go from crisis to crisis. Each time he will acquire more damage, more problems, with which he will have to live.”

“But you cannot be sure,” Kakashi observed.

“I hope I am wrong,” Kiba admitted. “I hope that some simple changes in his oxygen supply or his nutrients will solve the problem and he will pick up.”

“But you are experienced in intervening to save kits that are not thriving,” Iruka checked.

Kiba decided to be honest. “Orochimaru often wanted deformed foetuses to live so that he could study them. It was my job to keep them alive. I can do it.”

Naruto growled. “He is not deformed,” he stated.

Kiba understood. “He is beautiful,” he agreed.

“Kiba-san wasn’t talking about our kit,” Sasuke reminded Naruto. “He was saying that he can keep him alive even if there is something seriously wrong with him.”

Naruto stared at the wall. “No, we will let him go rather than do that to him. We will do only the simple things.” He looked back to Kiba. “I am relying on your judgement, Kiba-san, and I will agree with any decision you make.” He turned to Sasuke. “I wanted not to name the kits until we found out what they were like, but this one needs a name.”

Kiba understood. The kit must not die without a name. If he died without a name they would be treating him as if he was less than a person.

“Kazuki,” Sasuke suggested. “Harmonious, because we want his fox and human sides to work together and hope because that is what we have for him.”

“Kazuki,” Naruto agreed.

---

Kiba woke just before the timer buzzed. He reset it before checking the kit, as he had every one hundred minutes for the last five days. The kit was no worse. There might be the first signs of improvement. Kiba quashed the thought. It was too early. If he thought it Naruto might sense it. He did not want to raise Naruto’s hopes.

He visited the head, had a quick shower and investigated the latest basket Iruka had slid through the door of his room while he slept. He dressed in the clean clothes and demolished the food. Then it was back to the kit, pouring over the records of the last three hundred minutes, trying to decide if he should try the current settings a little longer or try changing them. He decided to leave them be.


There was the sound of the door between the nurseries sliding open. Kiba was surprised; he had thought that it was ship’s night. A check of the chronometer confirmed that everyone should be asleep.

It was Naruto. He was clad only in pyjama pants that clung to his hips. A heady cocktail of scents accompanied him. Kiba reminded himself that Naruto was not only taken but bonded; he had no interest in anyone but Sasuke.

Naruto saw Kiba and blinked. Kiba could see him trying to assemble enough coherent thoughts to speak.

“There is no change,” Kiba told him. “He is no worse. You should go back to bed.”

Naruto shook his head. He stared at the displays on the gestator and tried to use the viewer. Kiba could see he was too tired to do either. Then he climbed onto the platform and lay down, curling his body around Kazuki’s gestator.

Kiba made a decision. He went into his room, through the crew room and into Sasuke and Naruto’s room. Luckily the door was not locked.

The room reeked of Naruto, of Sasuke and of sex. A sleeping Sasuke was as beautiful as Kiba had imagined he would be. Kiba shook him awake.

“Naruto needs you,” Kiba told him. “He is in the kits’ nursery and he needs you.”

Sasuke threw off the bedcover. Kiba caught a glimpse of his nakedness before turning away.

“Kazuki?” Sasuke demanded.

“No worse,” Kiba assured him, “but I think Naruto is at his limit.” He heard Sasuke pulling on clothes and risked looking. He was already on his way into the babies’ nursery.


He gave them as long as he could but he had to carry out the one hundred minute checks. Kiba slid open the door to the nursery. Naruto was curled around the gestator. Sasuke was curled around Naruto. They were asleep.

It was the most beautiful thing Kiba had ever seen.

He managed to carry out the checks without disturbing them. There was a hint of improvement. Perhaps, if it continued for the next one hundred minutes, he would risk telling Naruto.

He watched them for a few minutes before creeping back into his room and closing the door.


Naruto and Sasuke were awake when he went in to perform the next checks. Naruto had the projector working. Sasuke was looking at the hologram. Naruto was studying the display on the gestator.

“He’s gained mass,” Naruto announced before Kiba was across the threshold. “And he is moving more.”

Kiba smiled. “That is good news,” he agreed. “I still must carry out the hundred minute checks,” he warned them.

Naruto nodded and moved away from the gestator. He stood with his arm around Sasuke.

The kit had improved more than Kiba had expected. He was making progress.

“It is hopeful,” he admitted.

---

Sasuke stood in the docking bay waiting for the Silver Leaf’s airlock to open. It was good that they had managed to rendezvous before Tarrasade. He just wished it had not been this day. He was exhausted, both physically and emotionally. At least Kiba thought Kazuki was making progress.

He went through the motions of greeting: a bow here; a response there; not rising to Tsunade-san’s comments. He remained focused on his objective.

“Jiraiya-san,” he stated. “I have something I wish to discuss with you.”

Jiraiya bowed. “I am at your service, Sasuke-sama.”


They went directly to Sasuke’s office. Sasuke signalled that Jiraiya should take a seat and went to make tea. He had prepared the tray earlier, it was merely a matter of heating the water and pouring it on the leaves. He watched Jiraiya via a strategically placed mirror as he waited. There was no indication that he knew about Itachi. He was studying the picture of Naruto, which Sasuke had displayed deliberately.

“Perhaps I should change that,” Sasuke said, placing the tray on the low table between the chairs.

“It is remarkable,” Jiraiya commented.

“One of Klennethon Darrent’s artists,” Sasuke told him as he walked to his desk and switched the frame to show a landscape. He returned to the table, sat down and poured tea for them both. He sat back in his chair; this was it.

“I have come to realise,” he began, “that you and I are the two people who loved Mikoto-san most.” He saw Jiraiya tense and his expression become wary. “Perhaps even the two people she loved most,” he added.

Jiraiya relaxed a little but said nothing.

“So there are two things I need to tell you. The first is that I have chosen to use Mikoto-san’s genome for my daughter. Her name is Hoshi and she will be born when we reach Tarrasade. Only Naruto, Rin, Shikamaru and now you know her genetic heritage. Shikamaru was helping me optimise the babies’ genomes. Naruto and you have the right to know.”

“A clone?” Jiraiya asked.

“I have changed her eye colour,” Sasuke admitted.

Jiraiya smiled slightly. “Let me guess, to blue,” he suggested.

“It was all I could do to acknowledge Naruto,” Sasuke admitted. “Of course, that was when Naruto had made it clear that there would be no baby narutos. After Kabuto’s interference we have six baby narutos. Perhaps I would not have done it if I had known that would be so.”

Jiraiya shook his head. “It good that your children should bear a mark of your love for him. Six little narutos as well as three little Uchihas. Have you thought through the consequences?”

“Not really,” Sasuke admitted. “Then there is the second thing, Jiraiya-san. Kabuto interfered in other things. He woke Itachi.”

Jiraiya froze. His expression became unreadable.

“Itachi remembers nothing of the last eleven or twelve standards and his memory of earlier times are also affected. It is as if he has undergone a selective mindwipe. That does not absolve him of his guilt and responsibility, but it mitigated my response. I have stripped him of the Uchiha name but I have chosen not to kill him. I have reserved that right, but I have chosen to wait to see what manner of man he is.

“The others have left the matter to me; even Haku has agreed to do so. Some of them have done this for me. Many have done it for Kisame’s sake. Perhaps a few have done it partly for Itachi’s sake, because they remember the boy and the man he could have become without our father.

“I know you can demand his life. I am begging you for a stay of execution.”

Sasuke waited. He could see Jiraiya studying him.

“You would expose your family, your children, to a man who kills for no reason?” he asked.

“No,” Sasuke replied. “He will see a Therapist when we reach Tarrasade. I have already sent to the Central Institute for someone suitable. If the Therapist says he is a danger, I will kill him. Until then we will all be vigilant.”

Jiraiya’s nostrils flared. “You get him in here, now. I want Neji here. No one else.”

“I can’t,” Sasuke admitted. “I promised Naruto I would not be in Itachi’s presence without proper protection. One of the kits almost died yesterday. Naruto is in no fit state to stand as bodyguard.”

“Use Kakashi,” Jiraiya told him. “Do it or I will demand Itachi’s death today.”


Within twenty minutes Itachi was sitting opposite him and Jiraiya. Kakashi was standing as bodyguard. Neji was off to the side slightly, observing.

Sasuke wished he were less tired.

“Do you remember me?” Jiraiya asked Itachi.

Itachi nodded. “You are Jiraiya. You often visited the household when I was a child.” He frowned. “Like Kakashi, you vanished after Sasuke was born but no one spoke of it. From what I have heard since waking, you must have been working with Kakashi-san preparing the crew for Sasuke.”

“I have the right to demand your death,” Jiraiya told him. “I had known Mikoto-san for the whole of her life. She was the best person I have ever known and I cannot imagine ever meeting her equal.”

Sasuke saw Itachi flinch.

“Explain to me why I should not kill you,” Jiraiya demanded.

Itachi did not look at him. “For Kisame,” he answered. “There is no other reason. It is the reason I chose to live like this rather than to die.” His gaze went to Jiraiya’s face. “The day we can be sure that Kisame will choose to live rather than to die, you can kill me. You would be doing me a favour I do not deserve.”

Sasuke felt sick. Did Itachi really feel like that? This was not the Itachi who had agreed to his terms on Jewel. What had happened?

“We could concoct a scenario to get you back in the tank,” Jiraiya suggested. “A relapse. Rin-san would normally refuse to do such a thing but I believe she would make an exception for you.”

Itachi’s gaze went to Sasuke. His eyes, those eyes that had always burned with such intensity, were dead. “You would agree to that? Please, in memory of what were once were to each other. Please.”

“Why?” Sasuke asked, not fighting the tears that were forming in his eyes.

“Haku-san told me what I had become,” Itachi replied. He looked at the top corner of the room. “It is hard to live with the knowledge that he won. That even killing him did not stop it. That there was none of me left. That I became the monster that he wanted me to be. That I became him.

“And I am weak,” he confessed. “I want to be with Kisame. I want to speak with him. I want to be close to him. Even though I know he is better off with Haku. Pretending that I want them to be together is the hardest thing I have ever done. I may break. I may tell Kisame what I feel. That will not happen if I am tanked.”

Itchai’s lifeless eyes came back to him. “Please,” he begged. “Please.”

“No,” Jiraiya stated. He turned to Sasuke. “If Haku told him, then Haku wants him to have to live with the knowledge.”

“Sasuke-sama, at least ask Haku if he would agree to it.” Neji requested.

Sasuke had not expected Neji to speak. He was, as always, impossible for Sasuke to read. He was even paler than usual, Sasuke could see that.

“Please let me fetch Haku, Sasuke-sama,” Neji asked.

Sasuke studied Itachi. He had withdrawn behind his hair. He looked frail. Sasuke wondered if he was broken. He looked to Neji and nodded.


The wait was excruciating. No one moved. Sasuke found himself wondering what Kakashi was thinking. Then his eyes went to Keitaro’s painting. He doubted that Itachi had ever been allowed to paint messy, abstract flowers.

He hated his father.


Finally Neji returned with Haku. Haku acknowledged everyone but Itachi and took the chair Sasuke indicated.

“It has been suggested that Itachi should have a relapse and be tanked,” Sasuke explained. “This would return the situation to as it was before Kabuto interfered. However, Jiraiya-san believes that this would clash with the reparations you have demanded.”

Haku did not hesitate. Sasuke wondered if Neji had warned him.

“Jiraiya-san is correct,” Haku replied. “It is not acceptable to me that Itachi should be tanked.”

Sasuke watched Itachi change. He straightened. His head came up. He pushed his hair back from his face. It was the familiar composed, elegant Itachi. It was difficult to remember the broken, begging man who had been there before.

Was this Itachi a lie? Was the other? Could they both be true?

His eyes were still dead.

“You have no idea what you are asking of him, Haku-san,” Kakashi stated, his voice harsh.

Again, Sasuke had not expected the interjection. What did Kakashi mean by it?

“Probably not,” Haku admitted, “but I know he has to live through it if he is to have any hope of redemption.”

Itachi’s head snapped about. For a moment he stared at Haku. Then he looked forward again, his face was expressionless but his eyes burned.

Haku stood up. “I will go now,” he stated. He turned to Jiraiya. “I add my voice to Sasuke-sama’s. Please do not kill him.” He bowed four times. “Sasuke-sama, Kakashi-san, Jiraiya-san, Neji-san.”

Then he left.

“Send him away,” Jiraiya said, gesturing towards Itachi.

“Itachi, please go to your room,” Sasuke said.

It sounded bizarre, like he was chastising a child.

Itachi stood and bowed. “Sasuke-sama,” he acknowledged and left.


Jiraiya looked to Neji. Neji looked to Sasuke, who nodded.

“He is deeply depressed,” Neji told them. “Not suicidal, or he would not be capable of worrying about what his death would do to Kisame, but beyond despair. For some reason that I do not understand, what Haku said helped. Perhaps it was the mention of redemption, the possibility of a future. Have you ever discussed the future with him, Sasuke-sama?”

“No,” Sasuke admitted. “I have never thought beyond him not dying.”

“If you are going to expect him to live, you must give him something to live for,” Neji warned him.

“Kakashi-sensei?” Sasuke asked.

“No one deserves what he has been going through,” Kakashi insisted. “Not even Itachi. He is working with me on the security systems. I will be more encouraging, less cruel.”

“Jiraiya-san?”

Jiraiya sighed. “I give up my right to claim his life. I will leave him to Haku.”


Sasuke sat in the chair for some time after they had gone. Then he forced his aching body into action and moved to his desk. He switched the display frame to the picture of Naruto. It helped anchor him.

It was a good day; Kazuki was making progress.

It was a good day; Jiraiya had not demanded Itachi’s life.

It was a good day; he still had his son and his brother.

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