Can I See Your Package
folder
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
13
Views:
1,564
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Category:
Naruto › Yaoi - Male/Male
Rating:
Adult ++
Chapters:
13
Views:
1,564
Reviews:
5
Recommended:
0
Currently Reading:
0
Disclaimer:
I do not own Naruto, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.
Part 9
Can I See Your Package
Part 9
Rating: NC-17 again for language
Warning: you know the drill, basically pervertedness all around. Not meant to offend
Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto
Lee was walking down the street just minding his business and thinking. He was thinking of a lot of different things...ok maybe he was thinking of one thing just different ~positions~. Hey, he never said he was an innocent when it came to the act of showing love...or lust...Whatever. Anyway, as Lee was thinking of what he was going to do to Gaara later he was stopped by someone standing in front of him. He looked up and frowned.
“Oh Hello Sasuke, what can I do for you?” Lee was never very good friends with Sasuke, hell the little bastard stole his moves at the Chunin exam Not that Lee kept grudges or anything... little punk...
Sasuke frowned and looked at the ground. He ran a hand through his hair almost nervously.
“Ok look, you know I’m not someone to get all into your business. Hell I could care less what you do with Gaara but...uh...” Lee sighed as Sasuke seemed at a loss for words. Oh great now he had to deal with this jerk-off as well as the rest of the village idiots...perverts...whatever it wasn’t important... “Well Naruto’s been a real nosey shit lately as I’m sure you have noticed what with all the scratches and sand up his ass. But unfortunately because of that, he’s been kinda refusing... well, not ~refusing~ but he’s been well..” Lee was ready to kick Sasuke in the face at the moment. What did he care if Naruto wasn’t giving it up for Sasuke anymore?
“Um..Sasuke it really isn’t my business...” Sasuke nodded.
“I know but look I need to know...” Sasuke moved closer making Lee step back. Sasuke glared and whispered somewhat loudly “Did you take anything to actually help it get that big?” Lee almost choked on his tongue as he looked at the boy in front of him. No...there was no way in ~hell~ Sasuke just asked about his penis...Well even if he did, there was no way Lee was going to have this conversation! Not with Sasuke of all people...Wait, what did he mean by asking that? What Lee couldn’t be naturally gifted with a huge cock? Figures the bastard would imply that.
“Look Sasuke, I didn’t take anything to get it this big. I was just blessed with awesome genes. What I’d advise you to do is to come up with something new in bed so Naruto doesn’t keep sneaking off to spy on me and Gaara.” Lee went to walk away but stopped. “Oh and Gaara said next time he sees Naruto trying to peep on us, he’s going to use a rolling pin on him.” Lee blushed slightly and turned away from a now ~very~ confused Sasuke. Lee really never wanted to see a rolling pin ever again considering his overactive imagination, and of course Kakashi’s big mouth. Hell last night he had a nightmare of a giant rolling pin coming after him! That was just wrong! Now he could never make homemade cookies ever again...
Lee continued on his little walk, not really paying attention to where he was going. That probably wasn’t the ~smartest~ thing to do considering he had people after his balls...literally. He walked pat one of the whore houses...ok so maybe that wasn’t the right word for it...no wait yes it was. A bunch of girls getting paid to “sit”and “talk” to someone like Jiraiya...definitely a whore house, right in the middle of Konoha too....nice...anyway Lee walked by quickly as the girls started whistling at him, figures...
Lee turned the corner and smacked into someone. This time he was not thrown into a wall though (thank god) but he was caught by a strong hand.
“Oi Lee, wow we really need to stop doing this ne?” Lee smiled at Chouji and nodded.
“Sorry Chouji, I was just on my way to pick up something for Gaara at the adult....uh...” Chouji coughed and nodded.
“Well that’s nice I guess, I just really hope Shikamaru doesn’t start talking to Gaara, no offense...” Lee smirked and shook his head.
“It’s alright, well anyway I have to get going I’ll see you later ok?” Chouji nodded and began eating his always present potato chips. Lee headed towards his destination only to be thrown out of the way by a purple and blonde blur followed closely by a green and black blur
“Seriously Shikamaru I didn’t ~touch~ anything!”
“Don’t think I won’t kill you just because you’re a girl! I’m always stuck fighting girls anyway, I have no qualms with beating you senseless. Now for the last time, ~stop~ spying on us while we’re in the shower wench!”
Lee decided it was a good time to pick his ass off the ground and just leave. Maybe he should go to Suna for a while. Just to escape the madness for a while. Seriously, he couldn’t even walk down the street without getting attacked, tackled, perved on, or just plain harassed. Lee shook his head, he’d think more on it later. Luckily for Lee he finally got to his destination without being glomped once again. He looked at the sign and blushed, he really hoped his nose wasn’t bleeding. The neon sign was bright and pretty much screamed perversion...which lets face it, that was the towns description lately. Hell they should just change the name of the village to ‘Giggles’ or ‘Pervert Nation’ something like that. Why not the town had apparently already named his penis. All he knew was that if he walked into the ‘adult store’ and saw a picture book of “Emperor Head” Lee was going to start busting some ass, starting with Naruto...little shit...
So he walked into the store. Not only was it embarrassing to walk into the place as is, oh no, they had to announce it like the king just walked in. The bell had to have shaken the door almost off it’s hinges. Plus apparently he was the third customer of the day who used the door and didn’t just use a transportation jutsu, so he was greeted with confetti and a balloon. The manager looked just ~thrilled~ to have another perv come into his store as he practically threw the confetti into Lee’s eye. The balloon was in the shape of a rooster that said ‘#1 cock’ on it. Oh yes Lee was going to go home and drown himself after this embarrassment. Especially with all the people in the store laughing at him. Christ, all he needed was a bottle of cherry lube! Couldn’t a man shop for his lovers safety without having everyone ~staring~ and ~whispering~. What’s worse is that Lee was pretty sure that someone bowed down when he passed them.
Lee went to the lube section and grabbed a tube of it then quickly went to the counter while trying to wipe the confetti out of his hair...were they really in the shape of penises?
Gaara was ~definitely~ getting the lube next time. This was worse then the time he went to get tampons and vagisil for TenTen and the damn things didn’t ring up at the register. Shaking of that horrible memory, he quickly paid and turned to leave. In his haste he forgot to get rid of the balloon. So as he walked back towards his house, lets just say this time people were definitely bowing down for him.
“You tell ‘em Lee!”
“Woohoo! Alright Lee! Be proud of what you’ve got!”
“Can I see it??”
Yep, Lee was ready to cry as he raced to his house. Quickly he slammed open the door and slammed it shut. He was breathing heavily as Gaara walked into the room. Gaara looked at the balloon and at the state his lover was in.
“What did they throw you a parade or something?” Lee glared as he threw the bag with the lube on the table where Gaara examined it.
“They might as well have. I’m going upstairs to take a bath...I feel violated....
Gaara smirked slightly.
“That wouldn’t be because you have a penis near your ear is it?” Lee yelped and swiped at the hair near his ear watching as the confetti dropped to the ground. “Don’t take a bath with that crap in your hair, it’ll clog the tub.” Lee nodded miserably and turned toward the living room mirror, picking out the confetti. “I like the balloon, maybe we should put it on the front door?” Lee glared at his lover who seemed to be enjoying his misery ~way too much.
“Don’t you dare.” Gaara shrugged and looked at the lube.
“Lee love?” Lee turned to Gaara and began taking off his clothes.
“You got the wrong one.” Lee’s eyes nearly popped out of his head as he ran over to check the bottle, he read it out loud.
“...and the grape will tingle your tongue....Goddamn it! I hate grape!!!” Gaara hugged his lover who sobbed against his shoulder.
“It’s ok I’ll just go by and get some when I’m done talking to the Hokage. I wouldn’t want you to go through that twice. Now go on upstairs and take a bath ok?” Lee nodded as Gaara kissed him lightly. “I promise to make you forget about it later ok?” Lee smiled and nodded as he went to walk up the stairs to the bathroom. Yay! Gaara was going to beat up some people for him and ~then~ use that perfect muscle control! Oh yeah! Now, Lee was happy.
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
Part 9
Rating: NC-17 again for language
Warning: you know the drill, basically pervertedness all around. Not meant to offend
Disclaimer: I don’t own Naruto
Lee was walking down the street just minding his business and thinking. He was thinking of a lot of different things...ok maybe he was thinking of one thing just different ~positions~. Hey, he never said he was an innocent when it came to the act of showing love...or lust...Whatever. Anyway, as Lee was thinking of what he was going to do to Gaara later he was stopped by someone standing in front of him. He looked up and frowned.
“Oh Hello Sasuke, what can I do for you?” Lee was never very good friends with Sasuke, hell the little bastard stole his moves at the Chunin exam Not that Lee kept grudges or anything... little punk...
Sasuke frowned and looked at the ground. He ran a hand through his hair almost nervously.
“Ok look, you know I’m not someone to get all into your business. Hell I could care less what you do with Gaara but...uh...” Lee sighed as Sasuke seemed at a loss for words. Oh great now he had to deal with this jerk-off as well as the rest of the village idiots...perverts...whatever it wasn’t important... “Well Naruto’s been a real nosey shit lately as I’m sure you have noticed what with all the scratches and sand up his ass. But unfortunately because of that, he’s been kinda refusing... well, not ~refusing~ but he’s been well..” Lee was ready to kick Sasuke in the face at the moment. What did he care if Naruto wasn’t giving it up for Sasuke anymore?
“Um..Sasuke it really isn’t my business...” Sasuke nodded.
“I know but look I need to know...” Sasuke moved closer making Lee step back. Sasuke glared and whispered somewhat loudly “Did you take anything to actually help it get that big?” Lee almost choked on his tongue as he looked at the boy in front of him. No...there was no way in ~hell~ Sasuke just asked about his penis...Well even if he did, there was no way Lee was going to have this conversation! Not with Sasuke of all people...Wait, what did he mean by asking that? What Lee couldn’t be naturally gifted with a huge cock? Figures the bastard would imply that.
“Look Sasuke, I didn’t take anything to get it this big. I was just blessed with awesome genes. What I’d advise you to do is to come up with something new in bed so Naruto doesn’t keep sneaking off to spy on me and Gaara.” Lee went to walk away but stopped. “Oh and Gaara said next time he sees Naruto trying to peep on us, he’s going to use a rolling pin on him.” Lee blushed slightly and turned away from a now ~very~ confused Sasuke. Lee really never wanted to see a rolling pin ever again considering his overactive imagination, and of course Kakashi’s big mouth. Hell last night he had a nightmare of a giant rolling pin coming after him! That was just wrong! Now he could never make homemade cookies ever again...
Lee continued on his little walk, not really paying attention to where he was going. That probably wasn’t the ~smartest~ thing to do considering he had people after his balls...literally. He walked pat one of the whore houses...ok so maybe that wasn’t the right word for it...no wait yes it was. A bunch of girls getting paid to “sit”and “talk” to someone like Jiraiya...definitely a whore house, right in the middle of Konoha too....nice...anyway Lee walked by quickly as the girls started whistling at him, figures...
Lee turned the corner and smacked into someone. This time he was not thrown into a wall though (thank god) but he was caught by a strong hand.
“Oi Lee, wow we really need to stop doing this ne?” Lee smiled at Chouji and nodded.
“Sorry Chouji, I was just on my way to pick up something for Gaara at the adult....uh...” Chouji coughed and nodded.
“Well that’s nice I guess, I just really hope Shikamaru doesn’t start talking to Gaara, no offense...” Lee smirked and shook his head.
“It’s alright, well anyway I have to get going I’ll see you later ok?” Chouji nodded and began eating his always present potato chips. Lee headed towards his destination only to be thrown out of the way by a purple and blonde blur followed closely by a green and black blur
“Seriously Shikamaru I didn’t ~touch~ anything!”
“Don’t think I won’t kill you just because you’re a girl! I’m always stuck fighting girls anyway, I have no qualms with beating you senseless. Now for the last time, ~stop~ spying on us while we’re in the shower wench!”
Lee decided it was a good time to pick his ass off the ground and just leave. Maybe he should go to Suna for a while. Just to escape the madness for a while. Seriously, he couldn’t even walk down the street without getting attacked, tackled, perved on, or just plain harassed. Lee shook his head, he’d think more on it later. Luckily for Lee he finally got to his destination without being glomped once again. He looked at the sign and blushed, he really hoped his nose wasn’t bleeding. The neon sign was bright and pretty much screamed perversion...which lets face it, that was the towns description lately. Hell they should just change the name of the village to ‘Giggles’ or ‘Pervert Nation’ something like that. Why not the town had apparently already named his penis. All he knew was that if he walked into the ‘adult store’ and saw a picture book of “Emperor Head” Lee was going to start busting some ass, starting with Naruto...little shit...
So he walked into the store. Not only was it embarrassing to walk into the place as is, oh no, they had to announce it like the king just walked in. The bell had to have shaken the door almost off it’s hinges. Plus apparently he was the third customer of the day who used the door and didn’t just use a transportation jutsu, so he was greeted with confetti and a balloon. The manager looked just ~thrilled~ to have another perv come into his store as he practically threw the confetti into Lee’s eye. The balloon was in the shape of a rooster that said ‘#1 cock’ on it. Oh yes Lee was going to go home and drown himself after this embarrassment. Especially with all the people in the store laughing at him. Christ, all he needed was a bottle of cherry lube! Couldn’t a man shop for his lovers safety without having everyone ~staring~ and ~whispering~. What’s worse is that Lee was pretty sure that someone bowed down when he passed them.
Lee went to the lube section and grabbed a tube of it then quickly went to the counter while trying to wipe the confetti out of his hair...were they really in the shape of penises?
Gaara was ~definitely~ getting the lube next time. This was worse then the time he went to get tampons and vagisil for TenTen and the damn things didn’t ring up at the register. Shaking of that horrible memory, he quickly paid and turned to leave. In his haste he forgot to get rid of the balloon. So as he walked back towards his house, lets just say this time people were definitely bowing down for him.
“You tell ‘em Lee!”
“Woohoo! Alright Lee! Be proud of what you’ve got!”
“Can I see it??”
Yep, Lee was ready to cry as he raced to his house. Quickly he slammed open the door and slammed it shut. He was breathing heavily as Gaara walked into the room. Gaara looked at the balloon and at the state his lover was in.
“What did they throw you a parade or something?” Lee glared as he threw the bag with the lube on the table where Gaara examined it.
“They might as well have. I’m going upstairs to take a bath...I feel violated....
Gaara smirked slightly.
“That wouldn’t be because you have a penis near your ear is it?” Lee yelped and swiped at the hair near his ear watching as the confetti dropped to the ground. “Don’t take a bath with that crap in your hair, it’ll clog the tub.” Lee nodded miserably and turned toward the living room mirror, picking out the confetti. “I like the balloon, maybe we should put it on the front door?” Lee glared at his lover who seemed to be enjoying his misery ~way too much.
“Don’t you dare.” Gaara shrugged and looked at the lube.
“Lee love?” Lee turned to Gaara and began taking off his clothes.
“You got the wrong one.” Lee’s eyes nearly popped out of his head as he ran over to check the bottle, he read it out loud.
“...and the grape will tingle your tongue....Goddamn it! I hate grape!!!” Gaara hugged his lover who sobbed against his shoulder.
“It’s ok I’ll just go by and get some when I’m done talking to the Hokage. I wouldn’t want you to go through that twice. Now go on upstairs and take a bath ok?” Lee nodded as Gaara kissed him lightly. “I promise to make you forget about it later ok?” Lee smiled and nodded as he went to walk up the stairs to the bathroom. Yay! Gaara was going to beat up some people for him and ~then~ use that perfect muscle control! Oh yeah! Now, Lee was happy.
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0