Campaign of Distraction

Chapter 9
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Sasuke closed his bedroom door loudly enough to fool his brother into thinking that the young boy was still upset and unfolded the scrap of paper. As expected, Naruto’s number was scrawled across it in an untidy scrawl and the man’s name just below it! Now this was just too good to pass up. Besides, maybe a little extra sex would loosen Itachi up about the no tomato thing.

Itachi pulled the ingredients for a simple vegetarian dish that his brother liked. The dish consisted of; eggplant topped with a feta cheese and sour cream mixture. On top of that were slices of tomatoes with melted mozzarella cheese to complete the dish. He felt a bit bad about yelling at the boy all day, so he figured fixing something that had a bit of tomato in it wouldn't hurt. He was totally oblivious to what his little brother was planning... Hell, he thought the brat was doing his homework. Looking back on it, Itachi figured he probably should have told Sasuke to do his homework in the living room, or checked his pockets and put Naruto's phone number away first.

Sasuke turned some music on like he usually did while studying and slunk over to the phone next to his bed.

The boy’s fingers flew over the buttons on the phone and Sasuke was forced to wait while the blond let his phone ring.

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Naruto sat in the living room, cell phone in one hand and a Vodka Tonic in the other... He was already calling? The blond would have thought Itachi would at least wait a day. He shrugged it off as he took a sip of his beverage and opened his phone. "Uzumaki speaking..." he greeted in his best bedroom voice he could muster.

Sasuke swallowed hastily and just stared at the smooth voice pouring from the phone like honey. That voice had reached into the little Uchiha’s body and hooked a finger around his balls to make his cock start to stand at attention and wonder why it had happened all at the same time. Holy crap that blond was hot even on the phone! “Uh, hi. This is Sasuke. I was wondering if maybe..."

Naruto's eyes opened wide and he almost dropped the phone. "What? Sasuke.... Oh... the brat, right. Um... how did you get my number? I thought I only gave it to your brother."

"What? I'm not a brat and he dropped the number in the house! It’s not my fault he can’t even keep track of a number that's worth keeping next to your balls. But that's not why I'm calling you. I need something form you and I think you’re going to enjoy it."

Sasuke crossed his fingers so tightly that they began to hurt and hoped that the blond would play along.

Naruto ignored the comment about balls and shook his head. "Not interested kid. Whatever you're planning, I'm sure Itachi has no idea; am I right?" He could smell shit from a mile away, and this kid was definitely trying to pull something.

Sasuke swore softly and loosened his pants to make it easier on his rising cock. "Well actually he does know. He's just too damn busy making dinner to call you and guess who found your number? Besides, he needs this. He’s had a hard day because of me. You don’t really expect me to suddenly kiss his ass out of kindness do you?”

Naruto raised one eyebrow. "Your brother asked you to call me?" He set his drink down on the table and stood up. "You think I'm going to buy that? I know all your little tricks you little troublemaker..."

“Hey hey, I’m just trying to be a good brother! Besides, if you didn't want to see him again why would you have given him your number in the first place?"

Damn fucking little shit was trying to guilt trip him... But what if he was telling the truth? Then he'd look like a total ass if he didn't show up. But on the other hand, if Itachi didn't know about the phone call and he just showed up unannounced.... Fuck, what was he supposed to do? He picked up his glass and took a long gulp. "Let me talk to Itachi."

Sasuke nearly felt like shitting his pants. Itachi wasn’t going to be happy about this. "U-uh… Sure, He’s making dinner at the moment but I'll try to get him to wash his hands to talk with you. Hang on for just a moment.” Sasuke scrambled to his door, one shoe had disappeared somewhere, and hurried into the kitchen. He had no plan, no clue what to do, and no Second take!

Itachi saw his brother scramble into the kitchen, for some reason with only one shoe on. What was he up to? "Dinner's not ready yet Sasuke. Did you finish your homework?" He just noticed the phone that his little brother clutched in his hand. "Who are you talking to?" He didn't hear the phone ring and Sasuke didn't have many friends, so it was strange to see Sasuke on the phone.

Naruto drummed his fingers on the side of couch waiting for either Sasuke to get his brother on the phone, or try to come up with some lame assed excuse why he was unavailable.

Sasuke put his thumb over the little microphone on the device to blur the conversation and hoped to God that this worked; otherwise his ass was going to be on a plate for a year.

"You don’t mind if Shino form school comes over do you? His mom threw him out again. Something about her lingerie disappearing."

Itachi gave his brother a weird look. "Who the hell is that?" He didn't believe his brother for an instant. "Sasuke, who's really on the phone?"

Naruto sighed a bit impatiently as he waited for someone to speak again. He could hear muffled conversation, but nothing very distinct.

"It’s Shino. He's at a payphone a couple of blocks away. You’ve seen him at school. Weird kid always wears sunglasses and a huge coat everywhere. We're supposed to be working on a project with a few others."

Itachi sighed. Well, if the kid had nowhere else to go... "Fine, whatever, he can come over. But I don't want him staying too long. You need to go to bed soon."

Sasuke smiled his head off and was glad that he'd taken his sweaty thumb off the mic for Naruto to hear that. Now to talk to the blond and get his sexy ass over there.

Sasuke smiled like a cat and lifted the phone to his ear. "Did you hear that? He said you could come over but no sleeping over. You'll have to crash somewhere else."

Naruto frowned. "I thought you said he already knew you were calling me." He raised an eyebrow. "You little shit... let me talk to him like I asked you from the beginning." The brat tried to pull a fast one on him; well he wasn't as dumb as he looked.

Sasuke hurried over with a smile painted on his face and kicked his bedroom door shut. "Hey it's not my fault he can't remember much beyond leaving work. After all, I only met his manager and got handcuffed to your manager instead. Oh and tell that old man to invest in mouthwash."

Naruto sighed. If he made a fool of himself by showing up there, he was going to kill the dumb ass kid. "Fine, tell your brother I'll be there in about a half an hour; and I expect you to not be in the room." Right before he hung up he added "Oh and one more thing, I will be staying the night; you can count on that..." He shut the phone with a satisfied smirk as he finished his drink and made his way to the bathroom to get ready.

Sasuke hung up the phone and sat down heavily on the edge of his bed. Now that he'd done what he'd wanted to do, the little raven felt drained, hopeless and trapped in a corner. Itachi thought Shino was coming over and Naruto thought his visit was Okayed. And then there was poor little spoiled Sasu in the middle trying to make things work for everyone. No good deed ever went unpunished, ever.

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Itachi had just finished setting the table when he heard the doorbell ring. Thinking that it was Sasuke's friend, he went to the door and didn't even look out before opening it. When he saw who was on the other side, he froze and blinked once. "I swear I'm going to kill that little shit one of these days..."

Naruto knew it had been a set up, judging from Itachi's reaction. Fuck what a little punk. Well, might as well play it off. He couldn't explain it, but the thought of the little brat gone from this world didn't sit too well with him. "Hey. Um... I was actually going to call before I came over, but I just really wanted to see you." That kid better be so fucking grateful for this.

"And Sasuke just happens to have a friend over at the same time you forget to call and show up? ." Itachi silently and invisibly stabbed Sasuke with a really sharp knife and imagined throwing the bleeding rat into a river.

‘Damn, he’s as smart as he looks.’ Naruto grinned a bit nervously. "You got to give him credit. He sure does go through a lot of trouble to get you laid... So, can I come in or not?"

Itachi ignored the first comment and took a step back, glaring daggers in Sasuke's direction. "Yeah he's a real saint worrying about other people before thinking about himself. Come in. I don’t want the neighbors to think you're peddling something illegal."

Sasuke opened his door a crack to listen in on what was being said and felt a hot flash race across his skin. It was either now or never. Preferably never but he couldn't just hide in his room all night. He wasn’t so desperately out of luck that he wasn't willing to go to bed hungry. With a deep breath and a stern mental talking to, Sasuke opened his door and stepped out in the first outfit he'd wanted to wear that day.

Once Naruto stepped into the apartment he saw... a sex God disguised as a little punk/brat/mothrfucking-pain-in-the-ass... otherwise known as Sasuke. What was this kid trying to do, give him a fucking hard on? "I thought I said I didn't want to see you when I came over you little two-faced brat."

Itachi almost chocked on his own saliva. "What the hell Sasuke? Go change your damn clothes. When I said not to wear that, I meant EVER."

"I live here so suck It.” he directed toward Naruto. “And no; I don’t want to change. Not after you took away my tomatoes." The little sex starved boy cast dusky eyes on the blond and tried to smile sexily as if that seductive voice form before could be turned into an expression. His face felt strained and made of plastic with what the little raven was trying to pull off.

Itachi's eyes widened and it was all he could do to not knock Sasuke flat on his ass for acting like such a slut.

Naruto shook his head. "You got it all wrong little slut-wanabe... come over here for a minute... " He then turned to Itachi. " You don't mind if I use your TV do you?"

Itachi looked from his tightly clad brother to his former co-worker and back with a look that clearly said 'what the fuck?’ This isn't what he'd planned on at all, much less for Sasuke to have instigated something this... insidious! That boy’s ass was going to be nailed to something before the next morning that was for sure. "Fine, I’ve got to check on dinner anyway.”

Sasuke pouted cutely and glared at the blond god before him with his lower lip trembling, a look that often worked on Itachi and Kakashi very well.

Naruto grinned. "Great; let’s go kid." he said as he dragged the little sex kitten over to the couch.

Picking up the remote that was on the table, he turned the TV on and turned to the pre-paid channels. He wasn't surprised to find that Itachi had some porn channels and started to go through them until he found something he recognized.

Sasuke sulked quietly as Naruto continued to ignore him in favor of the television. This guy must have some kind of fear of connections or something like that for him to not even say a word to the scantily dressed raven next to him and that just irritated the hell out of Sasuke. "Are you just going to sit there drooping in front of the boob tube or what?"Cause I'm just sitting here thinking to myself...”

"RIGHT THERE!!!!!!" the blond yelled, making the boy next to him jump ten feet in the air. "That, right there is the look you were trying to give me... not that... other thing... Look properly..." he walked to the back of the couch and grabbed the little raven's head and pointed it directly at the T.V. "Do you see what I mean? You need a lot of practice my good man."

Sasuke yelped at the blonde’s harsh grip and blinked at the TV to see what had gotten the blue eyed man so excited. There was no sex, the people were mostly clothed, and there was a girl in the scene. However the girl did have this sexy look that was making the men in the room almost rip their pants off and crawl over one another to get to her. "Couldn't you have found a man doing the look instead of a chick? And how am I supposed to learn that look if I don’t see it in real life?" The raven's scalp was starting to get irritated as the blond porn star's perfectly manicured nails started to slowly dig into his skull for whatever reason.

Itachi scowled at the linoleum tiles and stalked the oven baked dinner sizzling quietly on its tray in the oven. Trust Sasuke to fuck up a good night like this. The pony-tailed man looked though the glass front to see if the cheese had melted enough for the whole thing to be taken out and was brought forcefully from his reverie by Naruto's exclamation.

Naruto let go of Sasuke’s head as his earlier statement caught up to his brain. "Oh no... There’s no way I'm teaching you anything. FYI, I don't do little kids; not my thing."

"But...! Come on help a guy out. Sooner or later I'll have to know how to do that 'cause I sure as hell am not going to die a virgin! Or better yet, sex up my brother and I'll learn that way." Sasuke pulled his legs under his ass and shifted his weight to his hands just in front of his knees to stare earnestly at the jackass who'd roughed his scalp up.

Naruto backed up a few steps. "No. And even I did end up having sex with your brother tonight, I wouldn't let you watch."

He made his way into the kitchen ignoring the brat on the couch for now. He spotted Itachi taking something out of the oven that smelled suspiciously like Chicken parmesan... Only, it looked like there was no chicken in it. "Um... “He stopped suddenly, realizing that telling Itachi he forgot to add something would hurt the man's feelings.”Do you need help with anything?"

Itachi didn't even jump as he quickly put the hot pan on the stove before the heat got through the thin oven mitt to burn his long fingers. The cheese was steaming hot and the tomatoes were just getting to the point where their juices were starting to spread out just a little bit to flavor the rest of the vegetarian dish. "You don’t have to help if you don't want to but it would be a great help if you'd get the tea form the fridge and three glasses form that cabinet over there. "

Itachi turned around to get some plates from above the oven and carefully moved the steaming vegetable and cheese entree onto plain white plates.

Naruto blinked once. "You don't mind that I just came over unannounced... even though I thought you knew about it? I'd feel like I'm intruding if I just sat down to dinner with you guys."

Itachi carefully transferred the third slice of heaven on its plate and put some pasta on the plate from a pot on the stove and threw some fruit on there just for some added color. This guy was totally different form the man who'd been fucking him earlier. "I didn't know you were coming but since you're here I might as well be a good host. Besides I plan on locking my little brother in his room tonight just to make sure he doesn’t cause any more trouble."

Sasuke flung his shirt down the hall toward the bedrooms and sauntered into the kitchen with what he hoped was a far more accurate bedroom expression than he'd managed before. The schoolboy cast his dark eyes on the blond and smiled ever so slightly as if to tease the hell out of his target wit that glance. "I hope you've brought your appetite Naruto because I'm the first course."

Naruto almost dropped the jug of iced tea in his laughter. One liners? The kid had a lot to learn.

Itachi turned at that shitty line and stared open-mouthed at his dear, sweet Sasuke. The look on the boy’s face fell just short of smoldering despite his young age and that pale chest looked so damn hot that it was confusing the older raven’s ideology and morals just a tad. Incest wasn't supposed to be good for you, not to mention illegal! "Oh hell no. You get your ass into your room and get some real clothes on or I swear to God I’ll burn every slutty thing you own!"

The dark eyed boy blinked and his pseudo sexy pose was ruined as he tried to assimilate what he'd just heard. Wasn't that look supposed to work like a charm? And why wasn’t that blond asshole trying to jump and or badmouth him? "But, What? Stop laughing it's not funny you bastard!"

Naruto laughed even harder and had to put down the tea before he dropped it. "Oh my fucking God!!!! You are just too adorable. Now go do as your brother says or I'll leave right now.

Sasuke scowled at both men darkly and stomped off to his bedroom, picking up his discarded shirt along the way. Trust a grown-up to ruin his fun and just when he thought he'd gotten the look down too.

The spiky haired boy threw his closet door open and pulled out a plain black turtle neck that would cling to his body shape and a pair of skinny jeans that were about the same shade of black as the top. Sasuke didn’t bother to wear any underwear; what was the point anyway?

Itachi shook his head and set three places at the table while his brother most likely sulked all the way to his room to change. He'd done his best to raise Sasuke to be a good boy, so where had the eldest son gone wrong? Was it too late to fix the problem? "Thanks for helping. Sasuke can be trying at the best of times with a new guest in the house."

Naruto blinked at Itachi. Was the guy that dense? "You didn't notice? He wasn't just putting on a show for me you know."

Itachi closed his eyes and shook his head. "I know that but it's forbidden. Sasuke and I can’t get involved that way no matter what. I've come too close to losing him forever one time to let it happen again; even though THEY can’t scoop him up and drag him off now that I’m old enough to keep him legally. Not to mention he’s underage…”

The older raven smiled sadly at the remembered pain of loss and the constant fear of never seeing his brothers smiling face. He'd made Kakashi Sasuke's godfather the day after his brother had been returned to him safe and sound. That way, if something similar were to happen again, Kakashi would be able to legally take care of Sasuke until things were straightened out. "He means too much to me."

Naruto sat down at the table with the older raven and poured the tea for everyone. "But you still have an attraction toward him... I can tell by the way you look at him sometimes." He wasn't much for sentimental conversation, but he saw the longing in the older Uchiha's eyes when they had looked at Sasuke. He knew how the guy felt; Sasuke was... likeable. No matter how much he tried to repel the feelings, he couldn’t help liking Sasuke in the same way Itachi did; and not in the brotherly sense.

TBC

Sorry it’s kind of a weird place to stop… but another chapter should be coming fairly quickly. Probably tomorrow… So… yeah!